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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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11597587 No.11597587 [Reply] [Original]

After 25 years of virginity I figure it's time to stop laughing at you onahole otaku and actually get one myself.

I'm a lazy AMERIBURGERXXD who doesn't feel like going through the international shipping hassle and also knows that fleshlight and tenga are overpriced garbage. Are either of these things acceptable? http://www.queencatadulttoys.com/lilith-uterus-masturbator/ or http://www.queencatadulttoys.com/venus-clone-male-masturbator/

>> No.11597594

Please do not misuse spoilers.

>> No.11597598

Please do not post indecipherable text (example: "lol u tk him 2da bar|?") outside of /b/.

>> No.11597602

>>11597594
>>11597598
Epic......

>> No.11597609

Masturbation isn't something you want to halfass dude

>> No.11597613

>>11597609
That's why I'm willing to spend $50.

>> No.11597615

What's an AMERIBURGERXXD? Is that your irc nickname?

>> No.11597617

Take my advice. Research the archives like a madman, and spend as much as you need. The higher quality onaholes are more expensive, (usually) but they are worth it.

Don't buy until you are absolutely sure what you want, I had to throw out some cheap onaholes because I'm autistic.

Oh and personally, Hips > Onaho

>> No.11597622

>>11597609
If you don't masturbate on ecstasy while wearing a cute maid's outfit with a prostate massager up your ass, ahegao-ing for hours on end, might as well not even masturbate.

>> No.11597627

Also, this isn't how you start an onaho thread. Lurk more or pray that RDC saves your merciless soul.

>> No.11597643

>>11597617
Yeah, I'm leaning toward the $50 one since I don't want to risk wasting money. The reviews seem pretty positive.

I don't want to have a detached hip in my apartment, though. Just in case someone ever stops by.

>>11597627
This isn't an onahole general thread. I only made this thread because there isn't one currently up.

>> No.11597648

Maximum stimulation, extra realism but how would anyone who buys it know?

>> No.11597646

>After 25 years of virginity I figure it's time to stop laughing at you onahole otaku and actually get one myself.
Welcome to /jp/.

>> No.11597654

>>11597648
I thought there were tons of guys who bought fleshlights / onaholes because their wives were being prudes.

>> No.11597662

>>11597587
>After 25 years of virginity

lol

>> No.11597667
File: 67 KB, 490x424, get the HELL out normie-san!!.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11597667

>>11597662

>> No.11597665

>>11597662
Please don't do this to me.

I already feel enough shame reading this confirmation email.

>> No.11597669

Heh......

>> No.11597695

I live in LA around a lot of elevens and I've seen them in sex shops.

>> No.11597696

Wow fucking newbies fresh from /v/, huh?

>> No.11597696,1 [INTERNAL] 

OP here, why was this deleted? I thought onaholes were accepted /jp/ material.

>> No.11597696,2 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,1
Janny decides what is accepted or not nerd

>> No.11597696,3 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,1
I posted >>11597662. Then I hit Janny up on FB and told him to del this shit. Nothing wrong with onas bro, but being a virgin at 25? Pathetic.

>> No.11597696,4 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,2
Please don't call me a nerd.

>> No.11597696,5 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,1
It's a spin of the roulette

>> No.11597696,6 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,3
The fuck? I thought /jp/ was 4chan's unofficial permavirgin oldfag board.

>> No.11597696,7 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,6
It better be, otherwise I'm in the wrong place.

>> No.11597696,8 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,6
Most of us are being virgins ironically while laughing at nerds like you.

>> No.11597696,9 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,8
Damn. Now I feel like a retard.

Back to wizardchan I guess.

>> No.11597696,10 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,6
I am browsing 4chan for two years now and I have a regular sex life.

>> No.11597696,11 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,8
I'm still a virgin! Not in my asspussy though, only my girlpussy.

>> No.11597696,12 [INTERNAL] 

It's like when we ironically pretended that NEET life is fun and not a living hell of poverty and depression. Pretending that being a virgin is acceptable past the age of 18 is yet another successful master ruse from the experts at /jp/

>>11597696,9
wizchan more like normie feels central

>> No.11597696,13 [INTERNAL] 

Are girls who decimate their girlpussy with sextoys but have never had sex still considered virgins?

>> No.11597696,14 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,11
theres girl on warosu O_O?

>> No.11597696,15 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,12
Not all of wizardchan is /v9k/, you know. Some are virgins and don't give a shit.

>> No.11597696,16 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,13
>>11597696,11

Hey ladies... We should exchange contact details ;)

>> No.11597696,17 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,13
They are virgins where it matters (in the ass). Once you jump into bed with me you'll forget your pussy even exists I'll make you feel so good through your anus and expert nipple play.

>> No.11597696,18 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,14
(n˘v˘•)¬

>> No.11597696,19 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,13
All women are failures! Otherwise they'd be men!

>> No.11597696,20 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,17
Shouldn't you be off making perverted comments that nobody reads on xvideos?

>> No.11597696,21 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,20
http://gelbooru.com/index.php?page=comment&s=list

>> No.11597696,22 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,17
but I'm a good girl! I bet it would hurt..

>> No.11597696,23 [INTERNAL] 

give her the dick

>> No.11597696,24 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,21
'If nobody fucked you when you were a kid, then that's a shame, because a cutie like this deserves dick inside of him 24/7.'

lmaaOO

>> No.11597696,25 [INTERNAL] 

Just get a fleshlight sex in a can. It's as cheap as any 3rd rate onahole

>> No.11597696,26 [INTERNAL] 

Nowadays it is normal to be a virgin and eventually wizard. At least around here. So if you want to be a true abnormal, you have got to have sex on a regular basis.

>> No.11597696,27 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,11
That doesn't sound right. Did you unironically let someone fuck you in the ass to get them off while retaining your hymen, are you a post-op disgustrans.. or were you raped as a child? (;*´Д`)ﾉ

>> No.11597696,28 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,27
Oops, I forgot my name. Please don't tell /ota/ about this, I don't think they'd like it if I was talking to girls behind their backs. （~～~）

>> No.11597696,29 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,28
Who cares, dude? Even if I tried to tell anybody, you would just delete my post and permaban me. Stop bullshitting around.

>> No.11597696,30 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,29
Pin pon sekai~ Thanks for understanding! (/^-^(^ ^*)/

>> No.11597696,31 [INTERNAL] 

Ok. So I just received the product today. The plan was to use it when the wife was not in the mood. I opened the box, and could not resist lubing up and giving it a try. Could not believe how quickly it made me cum. The orgasm was almost painfully intense. I did buy the hard version thinking it would be good for a quickie and it delivered......maybe too well.

>> No.11597696,32 [INTERNAL] 

>>11597696,12
heh...always fun to find your own post during manic periods of searching 'depression' on every site possible

>>
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