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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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11064290 No.11064290[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

Depression thread.
How are you coping /jp/?
Made any progress lately?

>> No.11064298

I like to tell myself I prefer to be alone.

>> No.11064305 [DELETED] 

Wellbutrin has been helping me a lot with my depression.

I thought being a NEET would be good for my mental health but honestly it's really stressful. I miss my job and school. I cry every other day now.

>> No.11064299
File: 96 KB, 1280x720, [EveTaku] GJ-bu - 09 (1280x720 x264-Hi10P AAC)[2090FD73].mkv_snapshot_05.28_[2013.03.14_10.42.09].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11064299

Yeah

>> No.11064302

Lately I've been doing okay. I still procrastinate an awful lot and am always tired but when I snap out of it briefly I can still manage to make some nice things.

>> No.11064310

>>11064302
I should try making things. Is it a fun hobby? Time consuming? I bet it would take your mind off of other things.

>> No.11064317

I've had depression since I was around 13 and have been taking 100mg of Zoloft daily and seeing a therapist weekly to cope with it.

>> No.11064319
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11064319

>>11064312
ill love you

>> No.11064312

I think I would be dead by now if I had a gun.

I'm just so worthless. I wish somebody could love me.

>> No.11064315

When I feel depressed I put on my Japanese flag headband and focus on my reps.

>> No.11064321 [DELETED] 

>>11064310
I've been writing a lot lately. It's a lot of fun. I don't know why but it feels really good making things. My writing is crap but some people enjoy reading it.

>> No.11064322

>>11064317
ps I'm 23 now.

>> No.11064325

>>11064310

Sometimes you can really get going and zone out as you do it. I prefer to either keep a song on loop or work in silence. Depression hurts creativity though so usually the hardest part is finding an idea to work with.

>> No.11064328

>>11064310
Sure does. Making things is my career as a producer.

>> No.11064329

>>11064319
Don't lie to me.

>> No.11064331

>>11064305
Then go to school you fucking normal. You aren't cut out for the ＮＥＥＴ　ＬＩＦＥ™

>> No.11064333

>>11064317

Does it work? I am the same age as you and remember feeling this way from a young age too. I can't really afford therapy.

>> No.11064337 [DELETED] 

>>11064298
me too, but i actually am, means i don't have to mewl about like some fawning little faggot trying to impress some vacant-skulled carnal husk and can enjoy my peace of mind aand favorite things

>> No.11064340

>>11064329

>> No.11064342
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11064342

no, my bipolar is spiraling out of control, i don't have a job, i punch myself and overeat as self punishment, i live paycheck to paycheck, i'm probably going to end up killing myself or hurting someone else to prove that i'm crazy and need help.

>> No.11064348 [DELETED] 

>>11064342
This is how I was for the beginning of the year with my schizophrenia. Go to the ER and they will help you out!

How do you live paycheck to paycheck if youre unemployed?

>> No.11064349

After watching the k-on movie, I realized I don't feel bad because they will graduate and leave azusa behind and then become adults and then more likely never see eachother again.
I feel bad because I never got friends like that. Friends that would really be sad if you weren't there. Friends that loved you as much as you loved them.
I feel bad because another day passed and I'm writing this shit on my computer at 2 in the morning and I'm alone as always.

>> No.11064351

>>11064342
by paycheck to paycheck i mean i trim, so not a real job, but i guess it could be worse, i could be totally unable to work doing anything... nope, just menial repetitive tasks

>> No.11064358

I get paid to browse /jp/ while actually full blown autistic children yell in the background. It could be worse but it's slowly driving me insane because I go home with a headache every day.

>> No.11064367

>>11064349
don't worry, you aren't the only one.
a lot of people are just destined to die without ever having created any kind of friendship or relationship with somebody else. to make matters worse, some of them don't fill that space up with things that make them happy, like pursuing a skill or whatever it may be. like me

>> No.11064370

Struggling with my sleeping lately, half the week is spent sleeping all day, the other being unable to go to sleep at night.

Have a therapy session for anxiety issues in about 7 hours and I've had no sleep. I don't want to go, they're pushing for more stressful - I blame that for my exhaustion, going out our needing to interact with people was always an exhausting experience, I worry that this therapy is just going to end up making me as bad and unhealthy as going out used to, unable to sleep, miserable, exhausted and fill of nervous ticks that make any excursions that I do need to make, infinitely worse, since I need to worry about how much my body is spazzing around.

I wish I could work up the guts to apply for my neetbux, psych said I should, but it requires talking to someone online. At least then I could buy more books.

>> No.11064371

I'm pretty happy actually.

>> No.11064374

What's it like being depressed
All of my emotions require actual stimulus so I'm emotionally neutral 99.9% of the time

>> No.11064380

school and exercising used to make me very happy

now I cant do either very well, and I am quite sad. That's about it. Feel kind of stuck, because I try to get them back, but I can't.

>> No.11064391 [DELETED] 

>>11064374
That kinda sounds like depression.

I feel like I'm distracting myself when I engage in my hobbies rather than doing them because I enjoy them. "Now I have six hours to kill... I'll watch some anime..."

>> No.11064392

>>11064370
Here's the thing about applying for neetbux: they only exist so people like us can claim them. Whoever you talk to will be long used to it and very unlikely to make you feel uncomfortable.

And you get a physical, tangible reward for doing this 1 small thing: books.

>> No.11064406

>>11064374
Generally wavering between not really feeling much of anything, anything you do feel just feels like a flash in the pan that is quickly quelled by overwhelming apathy, leaving you wondering if you really felt anything at all, with some time spent being crushingly unhappy about things, before once again being overwhelmed by apathy.

>> No.11064418

>>11064358
I have autism.

>> No.11064423

>>11064418
Are you yelling?

>> No.11064425

>>11064374
a profound yearning for something you dont have the strength to acquire.

>> No.11064426
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>>11064290
I keep trying to tell myself that I'll take better care of myself tomorrow, but when I wake up in the morning I can't find the motivation to do anything.

Oh well. At least I can NEET it up some before I die.

>> No.11064427

>>11064391
>>11064406
So every emotional state that isn't happiness is now depression? You guys are fags. I'm incredibly apathetic, to the point of neurosis probably, but don't lump me in with your depression bullshit. I don't feel sad I'm cripplingly lazy.

>> No.11064431 [DELETED] 

I have a stack of dishes in my kitchen that I haven't washed for a week.

My toilet's bowl is black in some places from mold growing.

The apartment reeks of pipe tobacco, cigar smoke, and cigarettes.

It's not great, but I feel good knowing that I have a place of my own.

>> No.11064437

>>11064423
*punches wall*

*is 600 lbs*

>> No.11064441

>>11064427
there's a lot of different ways to be depressed.

i'm very simple though. if you're very sad for a long period of time, that's how i classify depression.

>> No.11064442
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11064442

I took some noopept to try to help myself motivate/focus and I'm going on 48 hours and still have a headache from it.

I feel really out of it and haven't been able to get anything done whatsoever. I wish I had stuck with aniracetam and only used it when I needed to do my drills or something.

The worst part is the bottle wasn't cheap and this check hasn't come in the mail yet. I feel like my boss is dragging his ass sending it because I haven't been available but it's hard to work when I want to tear out my brain. Hopefully it will be better tomorrow

>> No.11064459

>>11064333
Medicine alone will not help, and the side effects of antidepressants themselves may be bad enough for you to stop taking it. As for me it's only really decreased libido, but I've heard about some people being completely unable to orgasm, and of "male problems".

Anyways I'm lucky in that I know the direct cause of my depression and use the antidepressant to keep the negative feelings and obsession over it away so that I can go to work every day, but for a while it was really disabling to the point of hikikomori-ism.

>> No.11064463
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11064463

ITT: PUSSIES
>>11064431
Clean your toilet reject

>> No.11064466
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11064466

>>11064463
YEAH YOU GUYS SHOULD JUST MAN UP.

>> No.11064465

My anxiety isn't as bad as it was at the beginning of the year, but I've having more trouble with family problems at the moment.

I'm trying to stay positive though, and on the bright side I get to stay back from work and play shmups.

>> No.11064469
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11064469

Why aren't you depressed goyim on medication? Take some Xanax, Respirdal, Prozac, Welbutrin or Zoloft and you will be cured from your ailment.

No strings attached, goyim. There may be some side effects like weight gain, suicidal thoughts, blunted affect, insomnia, irritability, erectile dysfunction, hair loss, and maybe even death, but it's still perfectly safe!

>> No.11064471

>>11064431
Please stop smoking. When the body is cleansed, the mind is purified.

>> No.11064476

>>11064427
>So every emotional state that isn't happiness is now depression?
So feeling nothing is every emotional state now?

Depression is a flattening of the mood, not just being sad you faggot.

>> No.11064484 [DELETED] 

>>11064469
Risperidal isn't that great for depression. It's good if you hallucinate, but not for much more.

>> No.11064489

I haven't felt really bad since I told my boyfriend about my problems.

He's sick right now but I hope he gets better soon so we can have lots of fun together.

>> No.11064491

Be very careful with benzodiazepines like Xanax.

>> No.11064496

>>11064489
No girls allowed.

>> No.11064497

ive been on disability for depression for 4 years now

>> No.11064500
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11064500

>>11064489
I can't even tell my best friend about my problems... He'll just leave me like everyone else... So I have to keep lying to make him think I'm not a pathetic loser. I wish I didn't have to lie...

>> No.11064506

>>11064489
It's nice to have someone to talk to about your problems. Some people do not have anyone they are physically close with, and are afraid to make an adequate outlet offline to those they do interact with, which is why these threads appear.

>> No.11064507

>>11064497
... You can get on disability for it?

My doctor has literally just been throwing pills at me that don't do anything.

>> No.11064510

>being depressed
well im not surprised being that about 70% of you nerds admitted you cut yourselves yesterday

>> No.11064514

>>11064496
Do you really, honestly think like this in reality?

>> No.11064515

>>11064500
once I embraced this lifestyle and came to terms with the fact that I was going to die alone in this room, all my "friends" abandoned me. I tried calling them and talking to them but they just hated me afterwards and I havent spoken to them in years

no online friends either

I wish I wasn't like this...

>> No.11064532

>>11064507
yes you can
its actually took 10 months to go through so i guess its only been 3 years
ive been on most of the medications out there, everything sort of electro shock therapy
it doesnt feel right posting in these blog threads

>> No.11064533

>>11064515
>>11064500
Why are you afraid?

If you are at a point where you feel you do not have much to lose, then what can you lose from stepping out of your comfort zone in an attempt to find companionship?

>> No.11064536

>>11064515
I have two friends left, neither of which I've seen in RL for years.

My childhood friend I've barely spoken to in the last 5 years.

My other friend I had good contact online until about 2 years ago, where he got a job and became super busy, and I'm too anxious to start a conversation since I can't tell if people are my friends or not.

My therapist has been trying to work up to me meeting up with one of them, but it's scary.

>> No.11064545
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11064545

>>11064484
The field of psychiatry is one step ahead of you, silly goy. We have discovered that goyim can be psychotically depressed, allowing us a full arsenal of antipsychotics to use on them.

>> No.11064547
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>>11064533
Because he's my only friend... So if I tell him the truth and he decides that we aren't friends anymore, I'll have nothing and be worse off than I have been...

>> No.11064552

Been a NEET for three years, recently registered for unemployment benefits. Lately my life has gotten really fast. My therapist sees me once every two weeks, which is a lot of work. Also I'll get a doctors appointment to show them how autism I am. After that, they'll decide what to do with me. I hope they don't send me to a clinic again.

>>11064298
I have found that after years of having no social contact, I don't feel lonely anymore.

Maybe my brain has shut down that section.

Anyway, all of you NEETs should strive to save all sentient beings by attaining enlightenment and realizing the Tao.

>> No.11064553 [DELETED] 

I only have female friends because I'm too shy to ask guys to hang out. And after we go on a few dates and they find out how mentally unstable I am, they stop replying to my texts.

I have two friends right now, a girl I met in philosophy who's just as nuts as I am (her arms are covered in self-harm scars) and my childhood friend who's on SSI because she has high functioning autism. My childhood friend is worse off mentally than I am; she just spends all day lying in bed listening to music and masturbating. Whenever I talk with her online she makes sure to send me photos of her dildos. It's kind of gross but I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable by telling her that I think it's weird.

>> No.11064575

>>11064553
You should be careful because she'll see this post... you're not posting anonymously afterall

>> No.11064577

>>11064552
>My therapist sees me once every two weeks, which is a lot of work. Also I'll get a doctors appointment to show them how autism I am. After that, they'll decide what to do with me.
I have to see mine once a week with no sign of being thrown a bone via diagnosis, instead just ramping up attempts at exposure, could be worse.

>> No.11064580

>>11064553
Gay. We don't like homosexuals here, faggot.

>> No.11064586

>>11064553
She obviously wants you dude. Get it in.

>> No.11064591

>>11064547
Unless you made friends with him under false pretenses, the whole point of friendship is accepting people for who they are, as they are, and helping each other in need. In some circumstances, if you are honest they will remain your friend.

If your friend can't accept you after you share with him your honest situation and feelings, and doesn't want to help you in a time of need, then it's better to not associate yourself with such a person.

>> No.11064594

>>11064553
>My childhood friend is worse off mentally than I am; she just spends all day lying in bed listening to music and masturbating.
I-I have autism?

>> No.11064595

if I had a therapist she would probably fall in love with me.. it would be a big hassle

>> No.11064610

>>11064595
Why would she fall in love with you

>> No.11064623

>>11064553
TOKIKO PLS

>> No.11064627
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11064627

>>11064595
Pic related, it's me. With all these girls around me, no wonder I'm depressed

>> No.11064628

>>11064595
I can see why, even your post made me swoon over you.

>> No.11064632

>>11064577
My first therapist had one session with me and then stopped.

Which is funny because I was in the hospital at that time and therapist meetings are mandatory there. The head doctor told her to see me again and she still didn't. Don't even know why.

I didn't like her cuz she was fat. Maybe she fell in love with me.

>> No.11064636

>>11064595
you're pretty cute, wanna suck my cock?

>> No.11064645

Reading on other boards how they actively avoid and laugh at the ugly makes me realize I'll never have friends and then I get sad.

>> No.11064651

>>11064591
It wasn't false pretenses, it was more I made up backstory so I didn't seem like a useless NEET...

>> No.11064650

>>11064645
I'll be your friend as long as you're mildly autistic

No internet friend shit though

>> No.11064654

>>11064610
im really cute!

>> No.11064657

>>11064654
Prove it

>> No.11064662
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11064662

>>11064632

My first therapist gave up on me, basically, after six months. I'm seeing a new one right now and things are going much better.

>> No.11064666
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11064666

>>11064657
not bad for a /jp/sie right

>> No.11064673
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11064673

>>11064666
please dont respond for me

>> No.11064674

>>11064666
Not white.
0/10

>> No.11064679

>>11064666
subhuman trash

>> No.11064700

>>11064632
>>11064662
My first one was crap too, accomplished almost nothing.

Second one is accomplishing stuff, but she's really pushy when it comes to exposure tasks - which ends up in me doing things that just make me miserable or just don't get anything out of. Being asked to try and have conversations with people is suffering, the whole pretense is improving my social skills, but I don't have anything to say to people and don't really care, it's just an exhausting and unrewarding experience listening to inane chatter that leaves me worn out and frustrated with nothing to contribute to the conversation. Not sure if I prefer having a "good" therapist when I'm left worried that I'll be pushed so hard I just say fuck it.

>> No.11064705
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11064705

My GPA a shit. GPA is my life. Why can't I just be perfect?

>> No.11064708

>>11064349
I feel you man

>> No.11064711

>>11064705
You must be a yellowskinned slant eye

>> No.11064726
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11064726

DINGS ANT WHAT DEY USED TOBE

>> No.11064726,1 [INTERNAL] 

>>11064553
if tokiko can get so many babes why can't you?

>> No.11064726,2 [INTERNAL] 

I like to play games. Usually Sega games make me feel better. I'm not sure why.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNvAwAvVukY

>> No.11064726,3 [INTERNAL] 

>>11064726,1
Because he's a freak of nature that is somehow so charismatic that people still talk about him.

I will never understand.

>>
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