/jp/ - Otaku Culture

oh you

Finland pls go.

An atheist, communist, shitposter, liberal, muslim homosexual lesbian ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.

"How old is this rock?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied, "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian".

"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now"
The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.

The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity
.
Semper Fi.

I am also proud of being a GOD FEARING AMERICAN on this Christian imageboard. Happy birthday fellow Americans!

>>9292716
USA born and raised. Try again, yuro.

Unless it's racist, sexist, related to pedophilia or terrorism. Then you'll have your ass served to you in no time.

>>9292727

>>9292727
Needs a cis reference, get on with the times.

It will have been 236 years ago in a mere 3 hours that a new nation of free men and women was brought forth upon a world so used to tyranny and absolute rule. A nation where a man was not to be lawfully judged by his birth, ancestry, nor the color of his skin, but by the content of his character. This Great Experiment was a nation for the people, by the people, a nation where each and every man, woman and child was entitled to certain unalienable, God-given rights: the rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
It has now been 236 years after our great founding fathers built this great nation - not only those who authored the Declaration of Independence, but those who fought to let all men knows it message: the farmers and craftsmen who took up arms against the greatest army known to mankind and prevailed; as well as the men and women of revolutionary France who heeded our message and brought the first gentle rays of freedom to Europe. These men and women are responsible for single handedly lifting the human race out of dark, dark ignorance and on the great track of progress into a bright future.
It is 236 years later and we are now the most powerful nation ever to have graced this great Earth. No longer are we a superpower, but a hyperpower. We have lifted our common man out of the dredges of common birth and have reached out - walked on the very Moon itself, and we now stand ready spread our species, our way of life, and the idea of liberty across the stars. A new golden age for all man begins, and the United States of America shall be its herald.

Happy Independence Day, and may God forever bless this beautiful, glorious nation.

>>9292748
>A nation where a man was not to be lawfully judged by his birth, ancestry, nor the color of his skin, but by the content of his character

>>9292727
>eagle shitting on brave soldier's grave

FUCKING ANTI-AMERICAN EUROSCUM BIRD

>>9292734

>A young elementary school boy was in school, where the teacher was teaching History. The teacher taught that in European countries like Germany and England, you could get arrested for saying what you believe, because some countries don't have freedom of speech. The little boy raised his hand and asked "But what about the First Amendment?". The teacher said in a somber voice "They don't have the First Amendment in Europe."

This actually happened to me when I was very young, so for a long time I really did think that USA was the "country of freedom," as it were. Totally blew my mind when I found out that wasn't true at all.

Or maybe I only thought that because I'm stupid and had completely misheard the teacher.

>>9292716
I am america man, this country is grat.

>>9292734
I'm pretty open about loli love. Nothing happens to me, nor will it.

So today I decided that I would be patriotic and would ride around in a motorized cart. It turns out that it actually is the most comfortable and versatile way to shop for fatty foods that I've ever experienced. All Americans should do it at least once in their lifetimes

>>9292727
God blees the US of A

;_;7

Respects from Mongolia, Ameribros.

As a proud Veteran of this nation I can say that today is a day we can remember all of the proud soldiers that gave their life in the line of duty. God bless this wonderful nation, communist reds be damned.

>>9292756
This.

I suppose it was brainwashing, constantly hearing about how great our country is, constantly singing songs (i.e. The Star Spangled Banner), and "The Pledge of Allegiance" every single day in elementary school. I was surprised to find out that democracy actually exists in other countries whenever I started to get a bit older.

I remember hearing in elementary school that people in Japan are required to select a job whenever they are young, and they're not able to change their job in the future.

All of the nationalist pride and propaganda.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA! I'M GONNA GO SET A BOTTLE ROCKET OFF IN MY MOM'S SHOWER!

I was taught history and English by liberals who hated America, so this was never a problem for me.

God bless America.

I never saw the kopipe here before for some reason.
Nice stuff.

>>9292756
>>9292808
Why are people just eating it up? The majority supports it?

>>9292827
They were kids, you don't question things at a young age and are willing to take in any info. Kids are sponges.

>>9292827
>>9292833
Alright Reds, get out of /jp/ and stay out of america.

Yeah, America... where black people weren't even allowed to use the same water fountain as me 40 years ago. Have you heard the tale of "Old Nigger Tom"?

I had a black friend named Tom, it was a cold night in Michigan. I am a white man. We were walking by the river. Tom fell in. His skin was so dark, as dark as the night sky, I could not see him in the water. I used a fishing pole and a piece of fried chicken and through it in the water hoping he'd grab on... but I never saw him again. So now, I call him old nigger Tom.

>>9292835
make me turd commander

>>9292839

>>9292827
People are weak to symbols, appearances and repetition. Some people never realize/resist it.

A Mexican, a Jew, and a colored guy go into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Get the fuck out of here.

>>9292756
>>9292808
Obviously I'm not going to have children, but if in the event that I did, I would move to a different country first.

>>9292853
Good to know it's the land of the free.

>>9292850
>>9292839
>>9292836
>>9292833
>>9292827
>>9292808
>>9292756
GET THE HELL OUT OF MY THREAD, YOU UNPATRIOTIC SWINES

>>9292853
>colored guy
who?

mfw americans clap when job level goes up