/jp/ - Otaku Culture

It has come to my attention that /jp/ has been accusing me of the most reprehensible rumors. I've taken a day off from journalism to put this issue to rest.

1) I am NOT a shameless slut. These are plainly false allegations, true and simple. Any images of me in a compromising pose or situation is clearly doctored. We Tengu adhere to strict moral principles, the least of which admonishes promiscuous behavior. The most flirtatious act I ever usually do is pay Momizi compliments for her beautiful silky white hair and her cute wolf ears and tail.

2) I do NOT have any sexual relations with ZUN. I was the star of Shoot the Bullet because it is a danmaku photography game, and I am photojournalist. However, I and ZUN (along with Suika) do enjoy drinking together on Friday nights at the local bar.

3) The most strangest rumor of all, I do NOT bear any resemblance to the fictitious human character “Haruhi Suziyama” from the anime “The Melancholy of Hahuri Suziyama”.

4) It has been a concern that there have been pictures of me circulating “leaking piss,” the most disturbing that which involves the Yama ripping my wings off while I appear to soil myself. This is another yet reprehensible allegation brought about by doctored images, none of which is true.

5) Finally, I do NOT take compromising pictures of other inhabitants of Gensokyo. Bunbunmaru News has always been about upholding the truth, and turning it into a lewd gossip paper would surely stain its reputation.

I hope this will clear up any further rumors and allegations. If you have any questions or comments, or would like to submit a column or news idea, please email me.

Thank you for your time.

Humble Tengu Reporter,
射命丸　文
Aya Shameimaru