/jp/ - Otaku Culture

2. In another, Anon has experimented with a lot, so he knows their physiology. He almost boils two yukkuris (one Marisa and one Reimu), dips them in frozen water, and takes their skin off. Yukkuris wake up without their skin. "Id hurds!!!" He shows them a mirror, whereupon they are shocked. He then says he found their skins, and he'll give them back. Disregarding their protests, he puts Marisa's skin on Reimu and vice versa. With glue. He then shuts them in small boxes for 3 days. A week later, they were still pathetically rubbing against each other, trying to take their skin back.

4. Kaguya owns a yukkuri Chen and tends to spoil it, so it's quite self-absorbed.. One day, they go to an underground lab, where Kaguya puts it on a red-hot iron plate. She then sews its eyes shut. (Its exclamation it "I don't get it!"; "getting it" is as precious to yukkuri Chens as "taking it easy" is to the rest of the yukkuris.) Since then, it spent the whole day trembling in a corner. A few weeks later, Kaguya takes it to the laboratory and sews its mouth shut, leaving a small hole to feed it. It now serves as an armrest. Whenever Kaguya needs a massage, she clips one of its tails with a pair of scissors. The convulsions feel good.

3. Another with a twist: Marisa finds a family of Yukkureimus and a Yukkurisa in her house. She cages them, and Marisa says "It's not my fault, it was their idea!!! Let me go easy!!!" She lets it go. It says "Drop dead easy!!!" to the other ones before leaving. One week later, it's forgotten what it did (they always do) and sees the family again. "Hey, let's take it eas-" She gets violently rejected, and she doesn't believe that she betrayed them. It goes home, but it's been taken over by another Yukkurisa. "Get out easy, this is Marisa's home!!!" "No, you get out easy, this is Marisa's home!!!" After a week of being unable to take it easy due to every yukkuri in the forest hating it, it bumps into the Yukkureimu family again. "Hey, let's take it eas-" It gets lynched. Alice then finds it, heavily injured, and takes it home, revealing a JUST AS PLANNED; she orchestrated the whole thing from the beginning because she wanted a yukkuri that sees her as emotional support, not as a food source.

5. Yuyuko leaves for the day. Youmu goes for a nap after finishing her work, and wakes up to a yukkuri Yuyuko chewing on her ghost half. How it got there is a mystery. She faints and pisses herself. When she wakes up, she sees it sleeping as if nothing happened, and cuts it to pieces. Yuyuko walks in, sees the mess and understands completely. She sends Youmu to take a bath, and cleans the room while RAGEing. It turns out she was keeping some yukkuris as a midnight snack. She gathers them, has dinner with Youmu, and proposes that they eat a few manjuu together. They eat them alive. (Youmu only has time to eat two.) They share the last one mouth-to-mouth. It screams "Why are you doing this!!?" "Because one of your kind hurt my cute, cute Youmu."

6. Three with Meiling:
-She sees that there's going to be a yukkuri fighting tournament. She catches a Yukkureimu and trains it brutally, starving it and making it eat other Yukkureimus first, slowly turning it from a weeping and screaming mess to a killer. She then gets a Yukkuremi. It thinks it gets to eat the Yukkureimu, but it gets its hand bitten off. Scream. It then gets eaten. Then comes the championship. They get to the finals, where it gets a double KO with Alice's Yukkurisa (she had been keeping its friends hostage, apparently). In the end, Alice wins, but Meiling has found a new hobby.

This can't be very psychologically healthy.

7. A Yukkuremi tries to sneak into the SDM. It gets kicked by a sleeping Meiling. It tries (pathetically) to punish her with its umbrella, but the same thing happens again. Now RAGEing, it tries a third time. She dodges (in her sleep) and starts juggling it. After a minute of juggling, it drops to the ground, battered. It regenerates (they do that) and tries again. Meiling sits on it, doing some sort of hold on it. It screams. Sakuya comes in, and wakes Meiling up, telling her to get it over with. Meiling is surprised, but throws the Yukkuremi off and blows its torso away with a palm strike. Rumia comes in and eats it. End.

To OP:
NO ONE FUCKIN CARES.
Yukkuri have to be the stupidest fuckin shit to ever be posted on /jp/.

8. Middle of summer. The others have gone to Reimu's shrine, and Meiling is hungry and very hot. (In b4 she's always hot.) She sees a family of Yukkurisas that insist the SDM belongs to them. They try to get in, Meiling makes them faint with a shout. She then eats half of them (they wake up while being chewed). She doesn't really like sweet food, though, so she's delighted when a Yukkuremi shows up (they're meat buns, whereas the Reimus and Marisas are sweet). She throws a Yukkureimu at it to stall it, and gets a wok out. Yukkuremi tortures Yukkurisa, but doesn't eat it. Meiling then forces a bottle of soy sauce down Yukkuremi's throat, knocks it out, pulls off the wings and limbs, and starts woking it. It wakes up, trying to get out of the wok, but no. Meiling is quite excited and gives the wok one final shake, but it gets detached from the handle and breaks one of the SDM's windows. Meiling didn't eat that night.

>>904866
They're the only Touhou shit I'm interested in. So I care.

9. Mokou is returning home from Keine's place, where she ended up staying for three days. She finds a yukkuri family that think the place belongs to them. She dismembers the small ones, then starts scooping out the big one's cheeks with a spoon. She heard that the core is delicious. When she takes it out, it stops screaming. She then decides to take the sweet bean paste she's gathered to Eientei, to have a feast with Kaguya.

>>904866
To faggot:
NO ONE FUCKIN CARES
You have to be the stupidest fuckin shit to ever be posted on /jp/.

10. In the sequel, she finds out that yukkuris have eaten Kaguya's bonsai trees. (In b4 bad enough etc.) They make Mokou's paste into cakes, and have dinner. Kaguya then proposes yukkuri hunting between herself and Mokou. They split up, Mokou goes to the Forest of Magic, starts a fire and tells a yukkuri family that they won't be able to take it easy because of the fire, so they should gather all the other yukkuris. More than 300 of them. She sets a few of them on fire (without them realizing it was her) and tells them to dive into the river, but the flames won't go out with water, because phoenix. She then gathers them, and says she's going to take them to a place where they can take it easy. She incinerates them. A small one is left, to which she explains she did it. Terrified, it tries to leave. Tries. Later, she meets up with Kaguya. It turns out Kaguya used her eternity manipulation to make them reproduce instantly, so she got over 2000 of them. "Next time I won't cheat" she says.

11. Reisen and Tewi decide to have a yukkuri hunting match on their vacations. After various events, Reisen ends up promising a big family of Yukkureimus that she'll give them candy. They line up, and she shoots a suppository through all of them, except for the last one that was jumping out of joy at the moment. It took one more bullet. In the meantime, Tewi was using her good luck to get the yukkuris to come to her. In the end, Tewi beat Reisen by two. Reisen was pissed.

12. In the sequel, they go out for yukkuri "observation". Upon seeing a Reimu and Marisa pair, they stealthily kill the Reimu, and the Marisa is horrified and confused. After a while, they kill it and go on to a family of Yukkureimus and a Chen. Reisen drives the Chen crazy, making it think the others are food. It kills the small ones, and is about to eat the big one when Reisen cancels the effect. It "doesn't get it", and gets crushed by the big one. The two then go on to find a pair of old Reimu and Marisa, who have developed sarcastic personalities. Reisen: "Let's tease them and see." Yukkurisa: "She says she's going to tease us." Yukkureimu: "Scary, scary." The two get pissed and tear them to pieces. After that, Reisen felt that she got along better with Tewi.

13. One day, Anon returns from work after being sexually harassed by his gay boss. He finds a family of Yukkureimus, 20 of them. They shout at him to get out of their home. He's not in the mood, so he asks them to let him stay for the night. They demand thanks. They then wake him up at 6 in the morning, demanding to take it easy. He then starts the quarrel, pissing them off by falling to their level. "We'll get angry!!!" "And what will you do?" They have a match. They're convinced that they can beat him. In the beginning he knocks away the big one, and the small ones start assailing him. Nice massage, he says. Even after an hour of headbutting him, after he's crushed half of them, they're still saying "Just a little more!!! We can do it!!!". Anon then points out that the big one had fallen asleep. When the small ones try to wake it up, it demands to be left alone so it can take it easy. Anon makes a deal; he'll let them live if they eat the big one. They hesitate a little. The big one then begs Anon to help it. Anon says "they're your children, do you want me to crush them?" "Yes!!!" He does so, leaving only one. It exclaims "Where's mommy!!?" "I'm right here!!!" "Who are you, old lady!!? My mommy's much prettier than you!!!" After a while, he crushes them both.

15. A family of Yukkureimus is living in an abandoned house. They have a lot of food stored there, and take it easy every day. One day, an old man came in and started (IIRC) vacuum cleaning. The babies were horrified by the noise. When he stopped, they all told him to get out. He ignored them and sat on the big one. He took an apple from their storage and started eating it. The small ones shout "That's our food, mister!!! Put it down easy!!! Go away easy!!!" He ignores them, throws the apple away and gets out some gum. They change their minds, and tell him "Since you ate our food, give us some of that!!!" (The big one was moaning all along, but they stopped paying attention in fromt of the food.) He finally pays attention, and tells them to stand in a line. He then takes the gum from his mouth, and stretches it over their hair. They futilely try to lick it off each other. He then lights a cigarette, and blows the smoke on them. "*cough* That stinks, mister!!! Go away easy!!!" They finally notice the big one moaning, and try to approach him, but he farts. They go into a corner to escape the smell, but they keep shouting at him. Needless to say, the big one was horrified. He then stands up and tells them they can take it easy together. He starts jumping around, chasing the small yukkuris, almost stopming them several times. When they're too exhausted to run, he leaves, saying "We're good friends now, let's take it easy again tomorrow!" Needless to say, the whole family moved out while crying the same day.

Jissouseki vs Yukkuri
Who wins?

14. One day, Sanae visits Marisa to tell her that her yukkuri has grown to the size of half a room. (She has a family of Yukkureimus, this is the eldest one.) Marisa thinks that Sanae is weird, since everyone else in Gensokyo sees yukkuris as food, but Sanae raises them lovnigly. (Kanako also disapproves.) They visit the big yukkuri, and Marisa says it's pregnant. The number of babies depends on the size it's swollen to, and with this extreme size it'll die during birth. Sanae despairs, but Marisa suggests an abortion. Sanae hesitates, but she loves the big one (in b4 slut jokes) too much. Said abortion involves bashing it with a metal bat until it throws them up. What follows is a detailed description of Sanae crying while hitting it, and the yukkuri throwing up a torrent of sweet bean paste (read: yukkuri carcasses) and deflating. When it deflates enough to regain its speech: "Zdob id, Mwommy! My babiez are dying!" (It considers Sanae its mother). Sanae almost breaks down. After it has deflated completely, she folds it and takes it away. The room is flooded knee-deep in bean paste. Marisa then reveals that she had hidden the rest of the family in the closet. "That's what will happen to you if you get pregnant. So don't." "Okay, lady!!!" *shiver shiver* She then tells them that Sanae said they can have the bean paste on the floor. They're overjoyed. The plan is to get Sanae to see what dirty and barbaric creatures they are, so that she stops seeing them like that. The next time she met Sanae, the yukkuris with her were trembling.

16. Anon meets a family of Yukkureimus and Yukkurisas (mixed?). He asks them to let him stay at their place, and gives them some pork in return. They invite him, and he offers to teach them a game. "Slaughter game" "Slot...ter...game?" He picks a small one up, takes out a knife and says "First, we choose the "pig". We do this" (he slices its back with the knife) "and the pig pretends it's in pain." Indeed, the small one is screaming. Wow, it's really good at this game. "Then, we step on the pig until all its bean paste comes out. In the next round, someone else will be the pig, so it's okay." He gives the knife to the eldest sister, and leaves. They all play happily together, until only the eldest sister is left. The mother comes home, sees the mess, and the eldest greets her with "Welcome back easy!!! We all took it easy together!!!". "Did you do this!!?" Yes!! We played easy together!!!" Something happened after this, not specified.

this is a lot of words and I'm a busy man can someone sell this thread to me in a convincing manner?

>>904895
Dangos

>>904895
At least yukkuris try to attack, if failing.

17. Remilia is getting pissed at a Yukkuremi that's started to consider SDM as its own, and takes it to the mountains to kill it. She gives it a last bowl of its favorite pudding, but it throws the bowl in her face because it wanted cookies at the moment. It then laughs. Remilia is seriously pissed, and takes it back to the castle to "break" it. She puts it in an iron maiden. It begs to be freed, Remi and Sakuya have tea for an hour and then close the face portion of the iron maiden, putting its eyes out. A month later, they suddenly remember it. They take it out (it regenerates, so it was still alive) and put it in Flandre's room. Flandre now has a regenerating, screaming new toy. Yay.

>>904904
Never fapped to a non-porn, non-erotic story? It's never too late to start, you know.

>>904904
No, go read something else.

18. According to fanon, this is what happens to the Yukkureimu that Reimu was taking care of in Makako's comics.
The two were living peacefully together, Reimu feeding Yukkureimu snacks and Yukkureimu offering herself as a pillow for Reimu. One day, Reimu went out to investigate a disaster. Yukkureimu decided to try to clean the shrine, but was kidnapped (yukkurinapped?) by an eagle, which took it to its nest. At first it was all "I'm flying in the sky!!! Yay!!!" but when the eagle's young started eating it, it stopped having fun. After getting a lot of wounds and heavy loss of bean paste, it fell off the nest into the forest. Ants got on it and started eating the paste, so it started bouncing towards a random direction, hoping the shrine was that way. It found a puddle and shook off the ants, and went on to find a garden. It thought that if it ate the vegetables there, its wounds would heal, but then it remembered that Reimu had scolded it for eating strangers' plants. The ants were catching up. Yukkureimu didn't want Reimu to hate her, so she didn't eat the vegetables. She was losing consciousness. The ants caught up. Yukkureimu's last thought was "I wanted to take it easy with Reimu more".

19. Mokou is taking a walk through a spot in the forest she used to like, before it got infested with yukkuris. She sees them playing around, sees the damage they've done to the plants and the land, and gets pissed. They call out to her, "let's take it easy together, miss!!!". She agrees, and goes home to fetch some equipment. A bamboo pole, some string, and a "This is the result of taking it easy!!!" yukkuri Cirno, who was in some sort of hibernation. She catches the little yukkuris, uses the bis sister as a chair, scalps the big yukkuri, puts it on the yukkuri Cirno, makes a fishing pole with the bamboo and string, and starts fishing with the little yukkuris as bait. She eventually catches a big fish, and uses the scalped yukkuri as a fridge, putting the fish inside it. She then hooks another small yukkuri, and while throwing it, a Yukkuremilia catches it. Mokou decides that it's a big fish in a way, and eats it. Alive. She then goes home, satisfied with today's catch.

>>904920

too bad I finished fapping 10 minute ago, another time I guess.

20. 20. Anon has left Remirya in his car, in the middle of summer. She's got the safety belt on, so she can't move, and it's very uncomfortable. Anon then comes back and offers to cool her with some dry ice. She joyfully gets the dry ice all over her face and hands, but then it sticks her hands to her face. She can't take her hands off her cheeks by herself, so she asks Anon. He pulls them off, ripping quite a lot of skin off in the process. She starts crying, but the salty tears hurt her wounds even more. In great pain and unable to even cry, she's desperate. She puts her hands back to her cheeks without thinking, and they get stuck again. "You want me to pull them off again?" "No!!! ;_;" He then chooses the other way, to leave her in the car for a couple of hours while he goes to the beach. At 2 o' clock, in the middle of summer. He plans to gather a few pebbles for her, if she's still alive when he comes back.

21. Anon is gathering mushrooms for Marisa in the forest, and comes upon a Yukkureimu nest. He leaves the basket outside to take a peek inside, but the Reimus pop out, eat the mushrooms before he can react, breaking the basket in the process. Anon is furious, so he grabs the big one and kicks one of the small ones into a tree, squashing it. The others can't understand why he's doing this, they never did anything bad, and they're screaming. Anon almost rips the big one's hair out, throws it away and messes up their nest. The small ones cry out "Reimu's hoooooome!!! ;_;". He then ties them all on a tree, and tells them "Remirya (Yukkuremilia's actual name) is gonna eat you". They panic. "Or perhaps you'll be taken to the factory." Now they're going insane with terror. He then leaves them there, to whatever fate awaits them.

23. Yukkuri Yuyukos are called Yuubii. They are even rarer than Remiryas, and they can eat even more. They grow a body when they reach adulthood. They don't form groups, because they would eat each other eventually. There were even rumors that a fully grown one could eat a human, but they have been dispelled. Apparently, they can feed by *inhaling* other yukkuris from a distance, even fully grown Remiryas. They can also copy the characteristics of what they eat. In one fic, one sprouted wings after eating a Remirya. It then got captured in one of Eirin's yukkuri traps. By ripping said wings off, it also managed to create a familiar Remirya, which obeyed it unconditionally. (They're also quite lazy, and tend to leave everything to said helpers.) It tried to break the cage by bashing itself against it, but to no avail. Eirin caught them and took them to her laboratory, where the Yuupii heard some yukkuri voices, and started inhaling so it can eat them, but drew near some papers and gunpowder from the laboratory, and ended up with a bomb. (And also scattered papers and medicine.) Clueless, it threw it away, and the laboratory went up in flames. It tried to run away, but was caught by Eirin, who starts kicking it. It turns out that they're sakuramochi, after she kicks it to death. Cut to its cave, where a small yukkuri that can only say "yu~ yu~" is asking for food.

22. There's rumors of a yukkuri herd preventing the construction of a railroad (thousands of them), so two guys with a snowplow head there to investigate. The yukkuris greet them joyfully. They say they rolled down the mountain, and can't go back since they keep rolling back down. They're quite interested in the snowplow. The men invite one of them inside, put it in a glass box and start mowing down the rest. There are literal rivers of bean paste flying around. After half of them have been mowed down, the rest try to run away, but then collide with another herd of yukkuris that came down from the mountain to see what the interesting noise was. They form a mountain, and the ones in the bottom are crushed. The snowplow gan't go over the mountain, so the yukkuris on the other side relax. It then goes around. The yukkuris are stuck in the bean paste, and can't move, they can only watch. Later, back to the train station, they let out the one they took with them. It's blue, delirious with panic, and in a trance. They slap it until it wakes up, and kick it away. The plan is to make it tell the others never to go there again. A month later, the area is full of yukkuris again. Apparently, the yukkuris forget quickly. Even genocide.

24. A certain young man working with the police comes home after a long day of decieving everyone at work. He finds about that his Yukkureimu opened the door and let about 20 more Reimus and Marisas in. They've eaten all the food, broken his TV and decorations, and generally done as much damage as they could. Restraining his anger, he takes them to a room where they can take it easy. He gathers them, and builds a wall around them (don't ask me how). He then leaves them there for a day. He plans to make them experience hell on earth. The next day, he takes a hammer and a metal spike and tells them to start eating each other, or else he'll eat them. They get on with the cannibalism, but he starts driving the spike through all the yukkuris that seem to be winning, and then tells the others to eat it. In the end, he's left with the original Reimu he had and a Yukkurisa. He says "I'll eat this one." "No, Reimu's not tasty!!! Eat Marisa!!!" "Then I'll eat this one." "Marisa's not tasty!!! Eat Reimu!!!" He then gets them to fight each other, but they know that the winner gets the metal spike, so they don't know what to do. In the end, he kills them and starts thinking about what to do next. His train of thought ends with "I will becime the god of the new world!...Just kidding.

So yeah, it was Lighto.

25. One day, Anon buys a small remote controlled vibrator from Rinnosuke, who's quite embarrassed. We're both adults, dude, what's with the blushing? Thus thinking, Anon goes home. There he sees a yukkuri he's been playing with the past few days. He slips it a tranquilizer, cuts a little hole in it and implants the vibrator. When it wakes up, he activates it. "Yuyuyuyuyu!!? What was that!!?" "Maybe it was an earthquake?" "Erthkwake!!? I don't know, but it happened!!!" Anyway, he then tells it to come again tomorrow, and bring its friends. They come the next day, one Yukkurisa and one Patchouli (who can only say "Mukyuu!"). He activates the vibrator, Yukkureimu goes super horny and starts raping the Patchouli, (whose physical condition isn't as good as that of the other yukkuris). Yukkurisa's horrified. It turns out that after copulation, the "recipient" dies, and some sort of mini-tree sprouts from them, from which 10-15 mini yukkuris are born. Anon then turns off the vibrator. Reimu asks what happened to Patchouli, Marisa screams at her. Reimu: "Liar!!! I never did that!!!" Anon then turns the vibrator back on, and Reimu rapes Marisa this time, with the same result.

26. Anon is out for shopping at night. He likes sweets, so he bought a lot. On the way back, he meets a Yukkureimu, which greets him energetically and shows great interest in the sweets he has in the shopping bag. He lets it in the bag. It's overjoyed and starts gobbling them down, but then Anon ties the bag and starts turning it around. Of course, screams of despair are coming from inside the bag, lamenting the inability to take it easy. He keeps this up for more than ten minutes, until his arm gets tired. He then lets it out of the bag. It dizzily staggers back a meter, staring at Anon with a mixture of dizziness, hatred, surprise and dizziness. It then throws up a quarter of its size, backs up a bit more, and throws up again. Anon laughs and goes back to the store.

>>904949
>Cut to its cave, where a small yukkuri that can only say "yu~ yu~" is asking for food.

That doesn't make any fucking sense, but gets me every single time I read it.

27. Anon is a writer, but business is in a slump, and he's delayed the only project he's working on. Naturally, the editor is RAGEing. Anon has stayed up late, trying to finish it (on his PC), but his pet Yukkureimu keeps screaming "Stop working easy!!! Let's take it easy!!! I wanna play easy!!!". He is, of course, pissed. While hopping around the room, it tries to eat the flowers from a vase, and ends up breaking it. Of course, it denies that it's its fault. Anon RAGEs, cleans up and goes to the lower floor to dump the fragments of the vase. Upon returning, he finds the vile beast bouncing on his keyboard. The power is off. "I'm working easy too!!! I finished the work, so we can play easy!!!" Anon checks the PC, but no; all his work has been deleted. (Autosaving, Anon, do you use it?) He stares at the screen, dumbfounded, while Yukkureimu screams that since the work is over, they should play easy. He then takes it and dunks it into a garbage can. It didn't fit, so he pushes it until it does. He then puts a lid on it, and starts kicking it around the room, ignoring the screams and pleas for mercy. In the end, he kicks it down two floors, and leaves it in front of the front door. He plans to check if it's alive tomorrow.

28. A dozen of newborn Yukkureimus has just been brought to Anon's house, and placed in an empty room. They keep asking what happened to their mother. "She was eaten by a bad Remirya." "No!!! We hate you!!! Go away!!! ;_;" Anon raises them in that room, installing a slide, a sandpit, a small pool, a trampoline and almost everything they need. When they grow up, they begin to express the desire to go outside. Anon agrees, but says that half of them will get out now, and half of them later. He takes the first half and puts them in a hamster wheel. He tells them that if they run quickly, they'll get out. After 10 minutes of running, they're exhausted, and have just started to realize that the wheel is not moving. (Yeah.) Anon then says that they have to keep running to generate electricity until they die, otherwise - look behind you. They do, and see a crowd of hungry Remiryas. They are, of course, scared out of their wits, and keep running. The wheel, however, does not move. Cut to the other half (one is left behind, btw) which are put on a conveyor belt. They grumble, but in the end calm down and decide to take it easy during the trip. After a while, "It's getting hot easy!!! I can't take it easy!!!". The conveyor belt led into a furnace. The last yukkuri was thrown into a dark room. It begged to be let out, and when the door opened, it was ecstatic. However, someone threw something into the room and closed the door. Yukkureimu went to see if that something could be taken easy with, but yukkuri Flandres do not take it easy with Yukkureimus. End.

yukkuri makes me raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaage

29. While returning home from the grocer's, Anon encounters a strange yukkuri. It's a bit red, and it speaks very quickly. It approaches him, and he offers it a bit of food. It instantly jumps and devours it in one bite. He notes that it's a yukkuri that doesn't take it easy. "I'm Reimu!!! I take it easy three times more, so I'm triple Reimu!!!" It wants to go home with him, He initially objects, since it looks like it eats a lot, but then it promises that it'll get its own food. On the way home, it runs faster than him. He thinks that if he breeds it, he'll make a lot of money.Oddly enough, it doesn't think of his house as its own, and it keeps its promise to not break anything. Apparently, it doesn't have any friends due to its uniqueness. He even sneaks a bite when it's sleeping, and it turns out to be salty. A while later, a Reimu/Marisa couple sneaks in, acting like normal yukkuris. They start teasing Triple, infuriating it. However, when they taunt Anon, Triple snaps and pounds the hell out of them, and then proceeds to eat them. (For some reason, it notes that they're megassa tasty.) It's also quite obedient and loyal. He then takes it to the factory to discuss the matter of breeding it. They put it in a cage with another Yukkureimu, which it superfucks. The normal Reimu grows a tendril, from which a number of Triples grows right away. They start speeding around. Triple says that it'll raise its babies there, so Anon should go home alone. He sells it to the factory, and they give him a baby as a bonus. He goes home with the baby, and finds a few yukkuris in his yard, taking it easy like the place belonged to them. He calls out to them, offering them sweets, and then crushes them. The baby wakes up, jumps down and starts eating them. Oddly enough, it says "Itstasty!!! Misteryoushouldeatsometoo!!! Letseatittogether!!!" A selfless yukkuri? Impossible.

That's it for now. Looking forward to more summaries. Read it easy.

You have issues

>>904982
Thanks for posting.

>>904984
Don't worry, I won't hurt anyone. I won't let it make me. It's angry and excited, but it can't control me.

>>904982
I wonder what a yukkuri superfuck rape would look like.

...

Almost forgot. All the original moonspeak stories can be found here:
http://thewaterducts.sakura.ne.jp/cgi-bin/up/upload.html

>>904984
And he is not the only one. I have too.

No... I can't read this much hatred all at once...

>>904982

I want a story where everything ends well.

>>904982
/tg/;

RED
GOES
FASTER

>>905035
See:
>>904840
>>904845
>>904982

>>905034
Now with color

>>904922
>Yukkureimu didn't want Reimu to hate her, so she didn't eat the vegetables.
This one gets me. ;_;

>>905060
me too

>>904982 superfucks
best word ever

Here's a few more.

Anon works for a group dedicated to helping yukkuris. One day, after a rain that lasted for a few days, he goes to the forest and finds a family of one mother and 10 newborn koyukkuri Reimus, who were unable to go out since it was raining, and thus are starving. He takes them home, gives them chocolate and goes out to buy some more food. The mother ends up giving all of it to the kids, so she's still starving. She starts licking some of the chocolate the kids had bathed in. Then, one of them crashes into a wall while bouncing around, and leaves some bean paste on it. The mother licks it, and promptly proceeds to eat the baby. The others are screaming and assaulting her, but she starts crushing and eating them. After she's eaten the last one, she exclaims: "Refreshed!!!".

>>905153
Dekitaaaa!

>>905153
Man, yukkuri sure lose their concentration fast.

One based on the recent three-page comic by Makako. Reimu's Yukkureimu is being bullied by Sakuya's Remirya. She grabs it by the scruff of the neck and drags it all the way to the SDM - for the 21st time. Meiling is used to it, but Sakuya is angry. Reimu tells her that next time she won't show any mercy, and tells Sakuya to scold Remirya. She leaves, and Sakuya promises some candy to Remirya, and sends it to its room. Meiling notes that she didn't scold it at all. The next day, of course, Remirya is chasing Yukkureimu again. Reimu grabs it, tells Yukkureimu to go home, and takes Remirya to an abandoned storehouse. She ties it up, ignoring the struggling and the screams. It turns out that Sakuya had been spoiling it to an illogical degree. Remirya then remembers that it has wings. "Buuuuu, I can fly!!!" *Rip* "Not now you can't." She then puts a heavy stone on Remirya's legs, and leaves her there with the promise that she'll never come back. It can take it easy there forever. Later, Meiling drops by on a vacation, and instantly realizes that Remirya is in the warehouse. She doesn't mind, though, since she, Remilia and Patchouli really hated it. (It had the habit of drawing on Patchouli's grimoires with crayons). Later, word got out that Sakuya was raising a Flandre. It seems the trouble is not over.

>>905201
Note: She put a talisman on Remirya's wings so they wouldn't regenerate.

One fic with multiple stories.

1) Marisa goes to Kourindou, where she meets a yukkuri for the first time. She's perplexed, and goes on to make tea, but the tea leaves, cookies and the teacup she usually uses are missing. Guess who ate them. It also broke the cup because, as Kourin says, it imitates her, and therefore tried to take out her favorite cup, breaking it. She goes outside with it under the pretext of a workout, and Master Sparks it.

2) Mokou is talking with Keine.
-This is a yukkuri.
-I see.
-Burn it plzthx.
-k.
-This is another yukkuri.
-It looks like you. It even has horns.
-Burn it plzthx.
-k.

3) Yukkuris have eaten Kaguya's bonsai trees and the rabbits' carrots, and messed up Eirin's lab. Eirin takes the rabbits and all the captured yukkuris, and goes out to make an example of them. She places one into a tool that crushes it, and skewers three more. They're still alive though, so she pours honey on them and lets the ants finish the job. She then takes five more, feeds them some sort of super dehydrating pill and skewers them. After that, she tells the rabbits that they'll do the same in various areas of the forest, to frighten the other yukkuris away.

>>905317
5)Alice finds the yukkuri Marisa Master Sparked earlier. It's burnt black, but it survived. She taunts it by offering it several sweets, but they're all taken by the dolls. Eventually, she gives it a sweet bun. Halfway through, it realizes it's a spicy bun. Very much so. It begs for water, but Alice's memory is bad, so she can't remember where it is. In the end, she says that the dolls will give it some tomato sauce. It turns out to be tabasco. To finish things up, she stuffs into its mouth some wasabi she was going to throw away (I guess it's spicy) and tells the dolls to throw it away in a dangerous place.

>>905306
4) Meiling has captured a lot of Yukkurisas and Yukkureimus, and stored them in Patchouli's library. Patchouli and Koakuma decide to observe them, so they let out a Reimu and a Marisa. They try feeding them various things. They like some, they hate some, but they eat everything, even human flesh and blood. Koakuma then wonders if they can eat each other, too. To experiment, they shut them in a small cage for a week, making it look like Koakuma's fault. The yukkuris are screaming for Patchouli. A week later, Patchouli frees Reimu, and tells Marisa to wait a while. She then hands Reimu over to Koakuma ("Patchouli, there's the baddie!!! Get her!!! What are you doing!!? She's the baddie!!! ...Why are you handing me over to her? ...Patchouli?"). Koakuma takes Reimu to the kitchen. A while later, she releases Marisa with a huge smile on her face, and feeds it a great amount of something sweet, round and steak-like. Marisa devours it. When they get to the last slice, Koakuma flips it over to reveal Reimu's face. "Re...Re...Rere...Rei..Rei...mu???" "Yes, Reimu. Now, eat it." Marisa tries to run away, but Koakuma stuffs the last slice into its mouth, and takes it out to where everyone is waiting. Marisa, who was shocked speechless, tries to jump into Patchouli's arms, but she dodges and Marisa falls into a Remirya's arms. She gets a chunk bitten off, tries to run away, but gets levitated by Patchouli, who then reveals how much she detests yukkuris. Marisa is shocked speechless again, but Remilia tells her that if Remirya eats it, it won't be lonely, since Remirya ate all the other yukkuris as well. Afterwards, Patchouli notes that Remirya is modeled after Remilia, Remirya gets angry and bites Patchouli's hand. A moment later, it's a big stain on the wall. Remilia checks Patchouli's injury, they share a yuri moment, and Koakuma and Sakuya get on with the cleaning.

The factory employees have gotten their hands on a rare Remirya, and plan a certain transfusion. They shave a Yukkureimu, cut off the top part of its head, and extract more than half of its bean paste. (It only woke up towards the end, and since it had lost so much of its body, all it could do was drool like a retard. They then inject the bean paste into a screaming Remirya (they're meat buns, so it's like injecting orange juice into a human). It dies, and a tendril sprouts from it, from which Remiryas and Yukkureimus are born. The experiment was a great success.

>>905343
this shit is fucked up as hell

but i can't stop reading them and waiting for more

Fapping at the speed of pain

This is making me feel very bad. It feels like my mind is laughing, though. SUFFERING. I'm not sure what I should do.

>>905035
This one's for you.

A merchant is gathering yukkuris near the SDM. He's internally RAGEing at the fact that Remilia and Sakuya come to the market often, but have never bought anything from him. He also suspects Sakuya of stealing using her ability. He's caught a lot of yukkuris, and he needs one more to fill his bag. He sees a Yukkureimu, but as he tries to catch it, a Remirya eats it. Anon chooses to get back at it by stealing its umbrella and running away. It chases him for over 10 minutes until they get to his home. He returns the umbrella and kicks it out. After a while, he realizes that it doesn't know the way back to the SDM. He takes it out to the forest, finds a hole in a tree, fills it with grass and tells it that it'll live there from now on. "This is how you lived when you were young, right?"

Remirya and (yukkuri) Flandre are living in the SDM, being doted upon by everyone, but they've never gone out. One night, on a full moon, Remilia and Sakuya were missing, so they sneak out. They find a family of Yukkureimus and Yukkurisas in a nest. The mother bites off Remirya's wings, but Flandre kills it. They then proceed to slaughter the rest. They are then discovered by a group of factory employees, who wanted the yukkuris they ate, but are quite satisfied with this catch as well. They take them to the factory, luring them with the promise of sweets, and throw them into a cage with about 20 Yukkureimus and Yukkurisas, who gang up on them and start eating them. They can't do anything against so many grown ones. The employees tell them not to eat them all, so they'll regenerate. "Okay, mister!!! This way we'll have all the food we want!!!". They then take the two out of that caga and put them in another room, where yukkuri Alices are reproducing. As soon as the babies are born, the employees put the two in the same cage. The babies proceed to devour them, but the employees stop them at the last moment. The two are now going to spend the rest of their lives as a food source. They should have stayed at the SDM.

Thread bookmarked.

Remilia states that she wants to eat something extraordinary, and leaves the task to Sakuya. Sakuya goes to the market, and sees a Remirya being auctioned. She finds out that they can be cooked, and learns the method.

1) Tear off the wings so they don't fly away.
2) Take off the hat and wash them.
3) Restrain them so they don't struggle and steam them.

She doesn't buy it, opting to catch one from the SDM instead. She finds a couple, stops time and abducts one of them, leaving the other one confused and in tears. She takes it to the basement, pulls off the wings, steams it alive (it screams a lot), cuts the meat into small pieces and wraps them with the skin. Remilia is quite pleased, and understands what the food is. She asks if Sakuya can make it again.

There's also an omake about how to make a bottled yukkuri.

-Put a newborn yukkuri into a bottle. It will complain, but as long as you feed it, it will opt to take it easy in there.

-After a while, it will start to grow, and complain more. Keep feeding it.

-When it reaches a certain size, it won't be able to move anymore. Tell it to move towards the neck of the bottle, grab it with your fingers and pull hard. When it screams, taunt it by saying "But if I don't pull so hard, I can't get you out". Then, make a small incision with a knife, and drink the bean paste.

>>905540
>2) Take off the hat
Now I am sickened.

Japan is full of sick fucks.

These yukkuri torture threads are the greatest things to have graced /jp/ in weeks.

>>905317

Poor Patchouli ;_;

I have a better idea!

stop this story bullshit

just post more pictures you faggots

>>905616
Take it freeze

>>905563
I don't consider it torture.
I consider it pest control.

>>905616
This is the right and all of you know it

>>905616

Take it easy

>>905913
Well shit.

>>905913
WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SARA? FUCK YOU.

>>905913
Naturally I knows the take it easy.

I just spent the last 40 minutes practicing yukkuris.

Do I win?

N/N

Why is hair so damn hard to draw? Fuuuuck.

>>905990
Depends on whether you have experience drawing before or not.

I don't but it sounds like a short-payoff way to start.

>>906010
I haven't taken an art class since eighth grade.

>>904912
The sequel to this: The mother stabs the elder sister with the knife several times, and eats her top half. She then proceeds to eat the rest of the yukkuris, having forgotten what they are. Daddy Marisa then comes home, sees her eating something and says "leave some for me, ze". The eldest sister then manages to speak to Marisa, and tells her that Reimu killed all the children. Marisa then notices that Reimu has a live and screaming yukkuri in her mouth.She stomps her half to death. Later, the man returns to the nest, sprays the parents with a coolant spray and takes the video recorded he had left in the nest. He then takes them and sells them to the factory. He mentions to the manager that he plans to catch an Alice next. A few days later, in a forest where an Alice and a Marisa are living together happily, a certain man appears and asks the little Marisas and Alices if he can take it easy with them.

>>906028
>Daddy Marisa

I always figured that Reimu would wear the pants.

>>906046
Nobody wears pants in Gensokyo.

Except for Mokou

>>906063
Wriggle, too.

>>906088
Yeah, but it's not that unusual for boys to wear pants.

>>905704
"Are you the inferiour species known as Yukkuri?"

>>906100

A family of yukkuris has just built a house (the author asks us not to thing how) and the mother has gone out to gather fruit for a celebratory dinner. When she comes home, she finds a man inside. He says he didn't have anywhere else to go, and wants to take it easy there. He then takes a fruit from the mother and eats it. When she objects, he holds her down with one hand and eats the rest of the fruit. He then lies down to take a nap, and steps on a ribbon that belonged to the mother's mother. He brushes it away, saying it's just trash. The mother has had enough, and shouts at him to leave, since it's their house. The man declares that from now on it's his house. When the mother complains angrily, he says that he's just doing what they always do; barging into people's houses and claiming them as their own. "But you're a human!!! We're yukkuris!!!" He says that all yukkuris are retarded,which prompts the mother to start headbutting him. He then crushes her.

>>905201
For some reason, that page is in three parts...

>>906182 He says that all yukkuris are retarded
this made me lol

>>906196

I've decided to ignore all of this yukkuri stuff because it seems now it's just about how you can torture them the most.

I want my old YUKKURI SHITE ITTE NE back.

>>906341
Run easy!

>>906341
daily dose

>>906258
/jp/ scares me now. It's horrible, who would ever want to hurt such little things?

>>906367
DIE REFRESHED!

>>906275
Oh ho, just in time for the next one.

A farmer Anon goes home after a long day's work, and decides to preempt us by asking "Isn't this where the yukkuris tell me to take it easy?" They do, but one of them, a Yukkurisa, has a body, a deep, bass voice and is six feet tall. The Yukkureimu is normal. He preempts them too, telling them to get out of this house. Of course, they refuse. The Yukkurisa actually punches him, and he gets a nosebleed. They fight seriously for a while, with the Yukkurisa getting a few hits in, but Anon pushes it down and starts ripping the skin off its face. Meanwhile, Yukkureimu is cheering. After Anon rips some of the skin off, Reimu screams. Marisa gets up, but instead of attacking again, rips off the rest of the skin, revealing a man's face. "Huh? What the shit, where am I?" "Mister, why are you here!!? What did you do to Marisa!!?" The man apologizes, but he doesn't know what happened. He remembers that before going to bed, he was drunk, and he tried to take the hat off a Yukkurisa. When he saw that he couldn't, he put it on his head. The two men have dinner together, and end up becoming friends. It turns out that if you wear a yukkuri on your head, you'll become one. It's not irreversible, though.

>>906250
Thinking about yukkuri bleeding paste made me lol harder than ever.

>>906413
.....
what the fuck, man

seriously

>>906413

Awesome.

TAKE IT EASY IN HELL

>>906413
Oh god, yukkuris can take over the world.

>>906413
It's over. Gensokyo is finished.

>>906413
Fuck, touhou headcrabs! Better call in Freeman.

>>905317
>Remilia checks Patchouli's injury, they share a yuri moment

Details?

>>906515
Remilia shrugs off the incineration of the Remirya and approaches Patchouli.

-Oh my, are you okay, Patchy?
-It's nothing serious, Remi.
-But you're bleeding! Let me see it.
-You're so kind, Remi...
-Patchy...
-Remi...
Their eyes meet.
Their hands touch.
Their lips approach each other's.

That's it, actually, there are no details.

>Touhou headcrabs

>>906563
OH FUCK YOU.

>>906563
Are there any sites that do have details?

>>906576
Touhou headfrogs?

>>906592
It was just a random moment in an otherwise bullying-oriented fanfic. There's no more.

http://thewaterducts.sakura.ne.jp/cgi-bin/up/src/fuku0558.txt

>>906581
Hey, I didn't write it.

I know someone on /jp/ knows of some touhou fanfic sites...

>>906671
English ones?

>>906709
Dear God no. Japanese ones.

>>906716
ttp://thewaterducts.sakura.ne.jp/cgi-bin/up/upload.html

>>906758
Aren't these all yukkuri fics, though?

>>906782
Toward the end, yes, but some of the earlier ones are normal.

>>906367
Posted for great justice!

>>906886
FUCK YES! /r/ more of these type of edits.

1 - Say, Yukkuri, do you love me?
-Take it easy!!!
2 - If you love me, say "Alice, I love you".
-Take it easy!!!
3 - If you love me-
-Take it easy!!!
4 - I wuv you!!! Alice, I wuv you!!!
-I wuv you!!! I wuv you!!! I weally wuv you!!!
-Are you talking about me...?

>>906947
>-ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT KURIRIN?