/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Whenever I get dragged to big ceremonies I wish I had /jp/ there to make the experiences less boring and more bearable.

I want Saten anon to service me with his lewd mouth

>>8815981
I can do that for you too.

I'm just as good as him

>>8815981
If I post Saten would you accept my lewd mouth?

I want to hug a sad /jp/ when he is considering suicide.

To form a paramiltary group with a ragtag bunch of /jp/ dudes

I want to slit the throats of all the people discussing real world fellatio, regardless of whether they're being serious, ironic, or roleplaying.

I wish I had a friend who wasn't hundreds of miles away and through a screen

>>8816005
come hug me, dude.

>>8816014
Please don't hurt me, I'm just very lonely.

If I could do this with someone from /jp/ then my life would be complete and I could die happy.

>>8816033

Are you the girl or the boy?

>>8816022
If you're lonely, come here and we can hug and be pals and it will be great. You shouldn't want lewd things unless you're a horny moron who belongs on Omegle. In which case you will be used and abused and wish you had listened to me.

Now come over here and let's hang out, dude.

I wanna dress up as Touhous with /jp/.

I want to play video games with /jp/.

I wish I could get female hormones

sometimes I wonder if you people are serious or just playing around

>he
>his
Whoa man that's pretty homo.

>>8816079
I'm usually serious but people interpret what I say to be clever and satirical. I think people are overthink /jp/ too much.

>>8815970
I wish for the same thing

I wish I could suck your cocks through the internet. I'm not joking, I want to do this so badly.
I want to feel your rock hard members violating my mouth while I suck and blow them, twisting my tonge around all the crevices of your veiny cock and sliding my wet lips up and down them, servicing you like a whore. Your cock will melt inside my hot hot salivating mouth and throat when I let you push it deep inside to cum loads of your milk. Hmmmmfg. You would force me to drink it while you have a toe curling orgasm and I would gulp and suck even the last drop of that thick tasty semen, cleaning the hypersensitive head of your shaft as I look you in the eyes from below, as I beg you to ejaculate more inside my belly while I jerk off two other cocks with my soft and warm hands, pumping and squeezing them hard until they shoot their load over my naked body, my throbbing cock fully erect and dripping precum from all this, and my super tight virgin little ass hole gaping getting ready to get impaled by your diamond hard penis when you get impatient and flip me over to fuck me silly.

I'm not interested in 3D, but I'd cuddle /jp/ for a little while, if no one else would know about it..

I just wish I had a /jp/er to text. I own a phone but hate using it. I'm afraid of talking on the phone, but texting is nice because I can do it anywhere and answer at my leisure, unlike chatting.

>>8816095

>rock hard members
>members

Why do people always think up such ridiculous words? Just say penis or dick.

There's so many words like this and they're all so creepy. Womanhood, manhood, cunny, member, etc. Every time I read an erotic story it is filled with this stuff.

I want to dig a bunker with /jp/.

>>8816110
They need variety since they mention it so often.

Dick dick dick dick dick.

See? It's boring.

>>8816110
I always thought that was added for the comedic effect those words have

>>8816100
ill text you dude, just email me with your phone number! i like texting

>>8816110
The one that always makes me drop an erotic story is "my sex/his sex/her sex" as a substitute for genitals. It sounds like a middle schooler wrote it.

>>8816076

They don't help. Trust me.

>>8816052
Me too, but I have no idea how to make anything for dressing up as a Touhou.

They're really expensive to buy and probably not very good.

>>8816154

>>8816052
you saw those streams too right? i wish we could do it... those people are lucky

Create a successful VN group that has a one hit wonder that makes everyone millionaires.

>>8816154
Just wing it. Even if it's not that great (like so), it's still worthwhile.

>>8816160
Wait, what streams?

I wish I could drink tea with /jp/, cook for them and cuddle with them.

>>8816147
they do help but it takes a long time.

>>8816174
Swords and stuff aren't that much of an issue.

Making/buying a whole outfit is the problem.

>>8816209
Same idea, really.

>>8816181
those niconico con streams... they have guys cosplaying touhou that look like they are from here, maybe they are not but still look like good people id want to cosplay with

I want to fuq a /jp/

Play VNs with other /jp/sies.
Critique nukige with them as well.

I want to be a housewife to a /jp/ and live in a nice suburban neighborhood with a son, daughter, and golden retriever.
And when he comes home from his generic office job I'll take off my oven mitts and apron and call "daddy's home" while me and the kids run to go greet him.

Someday....

>>8816222
wch /jp/ wud fuq?

>>8816269
I-I'd marry you! you better be naked under the apron though.
...why am I so lewd? I can't help it, I even wrote that walltext about cocksucking when all I want is to love and be loved warmly by a kindred /jp/ soul. I want to cuddle softly but then I can't avoid lewd thoughts. Will you forgive me? ;_;

>>8816288
all of them

I wanna get fucking huge with /jp/ over a period of years, then go to a powerlifting meet in a frilly dress and pantyhose.

Is it too much ask to just cuddle with /jp/ once?

>>8816269
>>8816269
I want you

While you HOMOLORDS are talking about penis-sucking, would any of you be interested in sucking a small penis? Everyone seems obsessed with big penises, even on an anonymous board, and I was just wondering if there was a "market" for small penised individuals such as myself.

>>8816269

>kids

Disgusting. Replace the son and daughter with more pets and then it would be good.

>>8816525
You can't properly deep-throat a small penis

I'm sorry

>>8816525

No.

Sometimes i dispair and think about leaving /jp/ for the afterlife but then a thread like this happens and im reminded that /jp/ still has the capabillity for love in his heart

>>8816546
>>8816549
Damn. Maybe it's for the best.

>>8816049
Forgive me for the late reply, I would much rather prefer that. I don't feel horny, I just want someone to be ok with me as who I am.

>>8816525
small ones are nice for sucking because they're cute and less intimidating and less gag-reflex-inducing, but I'd be worried that you wouldn't be able to reach my prostate if we wanted to take things further.
Sage, because I'm being disgusting, albeit truthful

>>8816525
I will suck your dick even if it's small. As long as it's shaved and clean I'll put it in my mouth until it spurts your boy milk. If it's small I can take it completely in and suck it like a lollipop. I guarantee you that you will cum very fast... imagine my face with my mouth half open and your cock resting in the warm cushion of my mouth.. I jerk off your small dick peeling it back way too much until your worthless penis deposits its hot load and then I close my mouth and drink it while still caressing your little thing with my hands... even if it small it still feels great, right?

>>8816525
How small are we talking about here?

I bet you're one of those people who think that 5" is small because the average size on the internet is 8"

>>8816611
I'm sorry but 5" is small

source: I'm a professional cocksucker

>>8816611

5" is small. You must be white.

>>8816611
I'm a little above 4", though I enjoy being small.

Not the guy you're responding to.

I'm 5 1/2 inches mofo am I big?

>>8815970
I wish I could control luck, win the lottery, and become a NEET hikki.

Do you believe a hetero can be made homosexual through constant brainwashing on an anonymous imageboard?

I think it happens to me

>>8816611
Guy you're replying to here, a little over 4".
Quite skinny too, though not comically so.

>>8816617
It's just below average. Either you've never sucked a cock in your life, or you're a woman (women are horrible at calculating dick sizes).

>>8816644
get a load of this faggot, not wanting homosexual interaction

>>8816652
I wonder if the opposite if possible. My life would be so much easier if I could feel the same excitement from seeing a vagina ready to be penetrated as I feel from imagining a hard cock deep inside my ass.

>>8816657
You're making me feel big with my 5.9 cock
We should compare them by placing it one over the other and rubbing them together with our hands.

>>8816659
I'm good at judging cocksizes, since I'm a guy

it's just that 5" are barely touching your throat even if all the way inside, 5 1/2 to 6" is alot better 7" is perfect anything above is annoying

>>8816657
Sounds cute. It's suck it. Would be a little awkward to be penetrated by it, though, since it's like half my size.

>>8816652
It sort of happened to me. I'm not gay, because I can still fap to women, but I would never actually want to date one, while I REALLY wish I had a boyfriend/husband.

>>8816652
I believe it. I am already there. Gay propaganda about being "born" gay is just that, propaganda. Correct enviromental circumstances like being desperate sex deprived virgins while being constantly bombarded with homolust from japanese entertainment and internet faggots will make you crave cock sooner or later.
Analyze this thread. Here we are, each one of us feeding the loop with a bit of faggotry, ironically or not, reinforcing our gayness with homoqueer group dynamics.
That won't make you stop liking women, but...

>>8816744

I was scrolling the front page and saw this. Speak for yourself. Not everyone is a faggot like you.

>>8816744
It's not my fault women don't have delicious dicks.

>>8816762
You secretely want it... you just don't know it yet...

>>8816660
Oh, don't worry. Once I have all that money, plenty of cocksucking will occur. I'd adopt several /jp/ pals to live with me.

I plan on winning millions with the powerball. If I do would any of you consider dressing as a meido and do small chores around the house for me in return for free housing and food and a fair salary?

>>8816817
F yeah!

>>8816833
I'm rather small, very skinny, have longish hair, and enjoy crossdressing. I've also recently been rated as a 10 by someone, and posted pictures of myself naked several times on 4chan with positive results.

Would you consider picking me if you won?

>>8816833
I assume you live in america, so I'm out of luck ;_;

>>8816855
I-I have not won the lottery but would you be my maid?? I can't offer you a salary, but we can share mine even if it's small...

>>8816855
Absolutely, though I would conduct an interview so as to make sure I don't hire people that will murder me in my sleep, as well as a trial period of 90 days so both parties can decide if they're satisfied and if they want their contract extended.

>>8816873
>>8816889
I'm not a whore, but I would probably go for the richest one. Unless he's just mind-blowingly disgusting.

>>8816833
I'd be your meido if you don't mind a very hairy and very british looking man doing it.

>>8816927
Out of curiosity, what does a very British person look like?

>>8816930
Face deformed in every imaginable way.

>>8816930
the teeth mostly

>>8816855

Be rated as a 10 by virgins on 4chan when posting angled pictures and pictures that hide your manliness is the same as being rated as a 2 by a normal human being. You look like more of a man than you think.

>>8816930

>>8816930

>>8816930
verybritish

>>8816930

>>8816944
Actually, the guy who rated me 10 was watching me live on cam. I wasn't even crossdressing either. He saw my dick, too.

>>8816833
that's my dream you just wrote ;_;

I wouldn't want a salary, knowing my situation is stable would be good enough.

>>8816968

Then he's just a lonely faggot. Nothing special.

>>8816986
you really don't need to go out of your way to shit on his self esteem. Do you enjoy being a bully?

>>8816988

He's delusional. Why is it my fault?

>>8817037
Not whom you've replied to; while I get your point, you're a little overzealous about it.

>>8817037
I'm just saying you're acting like a dick and it's really not necessary.

>>8817037
How am I delusional when most people rate me well? Both on 4chan and off of it. All my life, I thought I was ugly, but recent events proved me that it wasn't true.

>>8817044
>>8817045

How can be I "overzealous" when he's making replies like: >>8817046

His confirmation bias is bordering on clinically insane levels. We have a nerd gone 40 dollar tranny who think he's a 10 (perhaps less than 0.5% of the human population) because a horny internet person told him.

>>8817046
Calm down. Post pictures. If they are good, people will support you.
I too am interested.

>>8817057
He never said he thought he was a 10, someone told him he was.

>>8817057
I'm not saying I'm a 10. I'm saying I've been rated as such recently.

>We have a nerd gone 40 dollar tranny
And, again, I wasn't even crossdressing during any of those cams/pics.

>>8817061

Please don't encourage stupid behavior. Are you new? Why would you tell someone to camwhore in 3D on /jp/?

The gay thread is here guys.
>>8816357

>>8816269
best post in the thread

1 day anon, 1 day

>>8817057
you have a point, you're less fucked up than him for granted, but you're not neutral.

it's best to not reply to him, and it's best for him to go on fucking /soc/ or whatever; the thread has been derailed badly enough.

you all know who's responsible, right?

>>8817080
Yeah. The jews.

>>8816005
Well, except Japan can't into th

>>8816005
you look so shiny

since when my /jp/ is so gay

>>8818872
/jp/ has always been gay. Fuck off to /v/ you secondary.

Make enough money to never have to worry about money.

I'm a little too much of a sociopath to deal with someone begging for my attention throughout the day, I'd much rather just purchase a call girl whenever the desire makes itself known.

>>8816014
Lol, you certainly have the world figured out.

>>8819081

As a shitty lonely hikki tranny I would seriously kill for a /jp/-tan to love and coddle and do things with that could actually tolerate my total lack of sanity. I really envy people who legitimately do not constantly crave physical affection and companionship, because it oftentimes tears me apart how lonely I am.

I cannot understand why you would want things like relationships or to even spend time around other people. It must suck to want that stuff, though.

>>8819111

I know that feeling perfectly.

;_;

>>8819237

I'm sorry.

;_;

>>8819183
I know, right? I don't understand why you'd willingly choose the hikki lifestyle if you actually wanted to be around people.

>>8819111
I don't care if you're shitty, I am so lonely too and want to hug you and cuddle with you and share good moments no matter what.
Post your location, maybe a miracle will happen!

>>8819111
it must suck to be a closet people person socializing twitter facebook using faggot huh?

I honestly can not understand how people need to be around other people. I have been sitting comfortably alone for years and have never felt lonesome once.

>>8819299
He is planning on murdering you once he finds you. It is so obvious.

>>8818931
He is right.
/jp/ was about becoming a little girl, not a homo sucking dicks.

Even though I own a lot of maid outfits, girls clothes, panties and such, I still think crossdressing isn't gay.

shameless bumping of homo thread

>>8819300
It does suck. And I honestly don't understand how people can NOT need it. I wish I didn't.
>>8819288
It's not willingly. I just don't have the mental stability to handle that kind of thing.
>>8819299
Northeastern US.

>>8819317
You forgot about FtM part of /jp/.

>>8819317
Your logic is flawed. Sucking dicks isn't homo if you become the little girl. You're just not serious enough about becoming the little girl.

>>8819354
For the Motherland?

>>8819357
Female to Male.

>>8819354
FtM part? They don't exist.

>>8819355
Little girls don't suck dicks. They drink tea, dress themselves in nice clothes etc.
Though, I wouldn't mind becoming a cum dumpster.

>>8819349
Southwest Europe... damn it...

>>8819366
The little girls of my doujin collection say otherwise

Why is /jp/ so homoerotic?

>>8819372

The best people are always far away, stuck on the other end of the internet.

>>8819379
It can't be helped. Suck my cock, dude.

Maybe one day, maybe... /jp/ mansion ;_;

>>8819401
No I wo... *Hmnbgdfg!* stop! don't force mmmm *slurp slurp*

I wish I could have sex with /jp/ users.

>>8824502
I want to hug you and stroke your hair