/jp/ - Otaku Culture

balloon time yo!

get in here!!!

>speech in front of 300 people

>>8593882
aw shit nigga

SWAG TANK

amazing people like yourself don't commit suicide. take it easy.

Well if you got brain enough to give that speech i trust that you are creative enough to come up with something on your own.

nigafucker

I'm hammred.

Lemme tell you that.

But, I'ma give you badass advice. No, seriously.

Just do it. Who gives a FUCK. If you fuck up, so goddamned what? You become homeless? Adventure of a lifetime. Bad grade? Nigga, who gives a fuck. People laugh? Fuck em, they're niggas.

Just go do it, don't give a fuck. get drunk, like I am now, if possible. I mean real drunk. Not pussy drunk. Flask, yo. do a handful of shots before class to loosen up, and periodically drink. Actually, put it in a aquafina glass beforehand. Talk in terms of grandeur. No one will call you out on tha shit. If they do, try to school their shit as hard as possible purely on the grounds of scientific feasibility and ontology.

Fuck yeah. Life sucks shit, so make it your goddamn bitch until it kills you.

But what concerns me the most is why someone who is clearly intellectual is even posting on /jp/ in the first place.

You are the people who are supposed to be our future politicians, inventors and scientists dammit.

Charcoal, but I've got a infograph of another way that's pretty good too.


Don't trust the bullshit "portal" suggestions, they're all pretty damned stupid.
The mask thing is less than ideal for plenty of reasons I'm sure you're aware of already too.

Get to it, OP.

すわえいが　すわえいが　すわえいが　すわえいが　すわえいが　すわえい
が

Take an arrow in the knee.

>my research cloning the growth hormone receptor gene

1.stop thinking about it
2.go get some cold bear
3.entertain yourself
4.tomorrow you'll be fine

>>8593907
From a young age, Hitler was orphaned and lived among the dregs of society. Leaders come from all corners of the earth.

>>8593905
If you want science, politics or inventions - do it yourself. I just want to take it easy. Not OP but I am going to make a speech about economy now because I haven't figured out the route to Gensokyo.

Got any tall buildings near by? If they are high enough you pretty much only have to worry about hitting someone at the end.

If you're going to Gensokyo, you should go out with a bang. Write a manifesto and go on a shooting spree.

>>8593899
I can't believe I read all that, or that you even typed it in the first place.

Take it easy OP and just play some Raiden Fighters.

OP, fellow sciencefriend here. I look forward to reading your research in the future. Don't do it, and take it easy.

Polite sage.

>>8593918
Why the fuck wouldn't you just shoot yourself?

Dumbasses.

>>8593878
It has always intrigued me how the target gene could be isolated from the DNA libary. I guess you had to make a lot of sequencing, but still it is unclear to me how can the desired sequence be recognized.

How much time before we can create supermutants from enhaced growth hormone affinity?

>>8594013
Most americunts wouldn't know the correct area of the brain to shoot, nor would they prepare for recoil. Enjoy your non-lethal brain damage plus collateral damage.

>>8593878 (OP)
If you wish to do this because you are nervous then you are making a shitty decision. If you really wanted to die all along but were strung along into the research, why not just see it through and then gas yourself. It would give your life excellent closure.

take it easy

and i take you have other reasons for thinking of killing yourself besides a goddamn speech tomorrow, because otherwise i'll find you and it will be a fucking homicide not suicide

>>8594033
Can you get autism bucks if you have brain damage?

Take it easy

>>8594015
When the government lets us.

>>8594046
I imagine most people would fire at the temple, damaging the frontal lobes. That region of the brain is responsible for interpersonal relations and personality. In case studies where people have experienced trauma to this region of the brain, patients became aggressive and acted more rudely to everyone around them.

You might qualify for autism bucks, but good luck finding any shrink who would actually like you enough to recommend you.

It sounds like you've got a good thing going, keep up the research and maybe you'll find a way to use hormones to keep girls from hitting puberty for dozens of years. Eventually you could create a world full of lolis.
Alternatively, kill yourself halfway through the speech in front of everyone, I'd never have thought anyone on /jp/ is successful, and I wouldn't mind some proof.

Post your research online so it doesn't go to waste.

I'd like to talk to you about it in 2-3 years.

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Want to talk about it OP? I'm sure you shouldn't die.

>>8594015
Not OP, but this probably involves restriction enzymes and specific preplanned nucleotide sequences.

>>8594122
We're actually not that far from stopping aging, and by that I mean 15-20 years.

To be precise, your body won't age, but that's it. You'll still die of cancer or some other disease eventually, you'll just die still looking handsome. It's also incredibly expensive.

Do it OP.
And make sure to mention /jp/ a lot in your testament. How your life went down the hill when you started browsing the board and how you learned the methods to kill yourself in it.

also not OP
we've identified the entire human genome quite a while back (where in the DNA a nucleotide makes changes) (look up the Human Henome Project),
many scientists are continuing work on finding out what changes trait-wise when a nucleotide is changed, but with what is known know, people could really start experimenting today, but god, US congress shits themselves over stem cells which are in no way harmful to anyone so I doubt they'd let us work with humans anytime soon

The only thing worse than suicide is failing to kill yourself when you try

http://fringe.davesource.com/Fringe/Information/Suicide_FAQ.html

>>8594149
Holy shit, really?
I mean, wow. Dont kill yourself OP, you've got life as an attractive young man to look forward to.

Pretty stupid reason to kill yourself. You can just say fuck everything, drop the research shit, and start over again with a lifestyle that allows you to take it easy. Killing yourself is overkill.

>>8594165
>Not capitalizing
>Henome

>>8594144
Yeah, I vaguely remember doing something like cloning bacteria genes for drug resistance, splicing shit in that made the bacteria blue, forcing bacteria to incorporate that gene, and then watch as the blue bacteria master race survived the onslaught as the noncolored peasants died.

You can just not go there

That's what I'd do

>>Anon can research cloning the growth hormone receptor gene but he can't research a way to kill himself

Goofy moe.

Anyways why would you want to kill yourself Anon? I mean you have hopeless NEETs here who don't even want to kill themselves. No offense bros.

Inject yourself with the growth hormone or engineered bacteria/germ weapons you have created. A career in science offers you plenty of interesting ways to kill yourself.

Find one dumpy looking guy in the middle of the theatre

Make the presentation directly to him

>>8594214
Are you trying to turn him into the final boss?

Imagine the entire audience is full of little 2D girls cheering for oniichan to do his best. Every time you say something impressive they go "Waaah? Honto ni?" You might have to wear a penis suppressing device.

>>8593878
Enjoy reducing your measure (in a multiverse) and still finding yourself alive no matter what you do. The better choice would be to just continue your research and contribute to the positive sum game that is scientific research.

Drink an entire bottle of Drain-o. Guaranteed death, although it is quite painful.

enjoy your castration in Gensokyou

I really wish I did kill myself now, I gagged through half of the speech and only one person out of the entire audience of 300 clapped, and he was my research assistant.

They're never going to give me a grant again, I might as well find a job in retail now. And steal some Prozac before they take back my key.

>>8596156
whats your major? can't you find a job in some laboratory?
I don;t understand why you can;t find a job with all that study.

>>8596156
I'm proud of you

>>8596156
that's awful. Well, put on some nice music and take it easy, you've done enough for today huh.

>>8596186
I have a masters in shitty Biology, and going to different lab is pointless since I still get nearly all my grants from the same people who were in that audience.

I knew I should've went into accounting or banking if I wanted to make a decent living, even if it meant contributing nothing of worth to society. They're the assholes who fund me and own the people who find me.

>>8596206
You have accomplished more then I ever will, why stop now? You almost have your shit together and ending up as me is the bad end.

>Get your shit together
>Do an hero

>>8596156
>>8596206
Hey, where/what did you last publish? Tell me journal/issue/subject so that I can find you.

>>8596206

Our department and most departments could use someone like you. You would have to go through background checks and stuff but the pay is pretty good ($60,000 starting).

>>8596220
>an hero

Take this shit back to /b/, kid. We don't look kindly on memes that we thought were funny when we were in high school around here.

And yes, I am the official representative of /jp/.

>>8596206
>>8596156
This is why I'm quitting Chemistry and going into CompSci.

The pay might be shitty, and the job options are limited, but at least it will be something I have some experience in, and something that does not require social interaction at all.

Nobody told me that hard sciences required so many interpersonal skills. Fuck this shit.

Hey OP, tell me more about what the field is like. It's what I want to go into. What's finding a job placement like?

I was thinking of switching my major to biology but reading this thread now I'm not so sure.

>>8596206
Story sounds fishy. How can you have your own lab and apply for your own grants with just a Masters? Also, the GH receptor gene was cloned in previous fucking century.

>>8596238
>CompSci

As someone who dropped out of compsci in his senior year, I can tell you it's not what you think it is. Unless you're going to be a systems analyst, which is hard as fuck even for math geniuses, you're going to be unemployed or working in a cubicle dealing with office drama bullshit like in Office Space. You won't be sitting alone in your own office surrounded by computers all day.

>>8596258
What do you suggest that has minimum social interaction needed?

I dropped out of university because they required a speech class even though I was going into programming.

Fuck higher education. I'd rather teach myself shit I actually need to know and want to learn than pay some asshole professor to talk at me about something I hate doing.

>>8596265
Anything that will make you any decent money requires more than a minimum amount of social interaction.

Unless you have a ton of money and feel like going into online trading. And even then that's not a guaranteed wage. In fact, you'll probably lose money instead.

>>8596269
Fuck yea, I'd much rather just use OCW than put myself through hell in college.

Who touhou major here?

>>8596293
Stop spamming every thread you fuck.

>>8596278

>>8596286
What is OCW?

>>8596302
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OpenCourseWare

I'm a programmer and I have to interact with a lot of people everyday. At least they are the same people mostly, but I think it would worst if I had to work in the first floor with the cashiers. I want to make mobile apps for the hipsters that way I won't have to leave my home.

>>8596206
It's your fault for studying scienceshit and not something that gets you a 6 figure starting salary, like finance or economics.

>>8596156
Shit happens

>>8596323
That's the mentality which sank the economy, it may be the most profitable forthwith but quick reminder that the point of society is to make life easier for everyone through cooperation thus scientific progress, I'm not saying that there's no need of economics but lots of people start the career with “Find cracks in the market to milk everyone else job” in mind.

>>8596265
Low wage manual labor is the best option for it, really.
There's no yuppie bonding, and most of the workers are ex cons or drug addicts you want to know you about as much as they want you to know them.
As a plus, this is really the only way to work around middleaged men without getting harassed or mugged becuase they have too much to risk just to "put some kid in his place".

You won't run into any of the usual rejects you get at mcdonalds or whatever either, I mean people like the jock who can't do better, or the rave type druggy who wants to know everyone, women will be a rarity, and you're boss is less likely to be younger than you are.

Skilled labor doesn't net any of those befits, so don't plan on retiring on this kind of work. It's perfect for someone who doesn't want a social life, and doesn't plan to own three cars.

Shouldn't you normals be off doing your homework? This board isn't for your kind anyway.

>>8596397
You can't be a Neet forever, one day shit will happen and you will have to work. Dead people cant browse /jp/

>>8596397
Sure is good to be truNEET when your parents alive and willing to support you.

>>8596922
Nobody gives a shit about your sob story.

>>8596926
You only say that because he's a tripfag.

He's just pointing out that being a truNEET is a luxury. Not everyone is so lucky. Should people get out just because they aren't in that ideal situation, from what might be no fault of their own? It's not a sob story, why do people work? In order to get money, to first survive and second enjoy themselves.

It could be worse, since you only have it one time.

I study and work for six years total and finally get a masters in EE. I got hired and had to interface with the Mech Eng guys. They looked like swell people, but you know what they do? They haze me. They call my entire department "wire weenies"
You know how hard it is to work with that pressure? We have to ship precision and state of the art machinery at a deadline, and they call me a fucking "weenie" during the middle of it, like it's my god damn fucking name. It's not friendly banter, it's workplace harassment. I want to file a report but I can't do it anonymously...

Okay, OP. Here is a solution if fucking this up really will fuck your life up.

Call in sick.

Problem solved. Wowie zow. As soon as you're alone, spend every second you have getting your shit together, whether that means preparing a presentation or fleeing the country.

Or, just >>8593899 it like a boss.

>>8597045
Call them nerds back? Start working on looking more imposing? Damn it Anon you're a man, not a mouse or a little girl. We engineers are supposed to be tough as nails.

Also Sayaka is moe as HELL.

>>8597152
More like engiQUEERS.

>>8597045
punch one of them until they are in the fetal position. They will learn to fear your autism strength.

normalfag hour

>>8597240
I'd be arrested. I was actually hoping for /jp/ to give me some kind of advice. I've actually seriously considered calling them butthomo's, but decided against it.

>>8597272
I usually try to repel people by doing whatever is considered repulsive. Pretending not to speak english helps, too.

What is it with scientists and suicide?

>>8597279
Then again, you said that you have to work with them, so not sure how that would work.

>>8597272
Have you talked to your boss or other co-workers about it? What do they think?

>>8597045
How goddamn autistic can you be?

I can understand getting upset if they called you a dipshit or a fuckface, but weenie is obviously meant jokingly and if it's not then they're fucking nerds and you should call them fucking nerds.

I'm also pretty sure you're making this shit up since nobody with a masters in EE could be this stupid.

>>8597272
Calling them butthomos would probably impress them. It's too late now for that though, you'd look doubly awkward. Just act normally.

>>8596950
What you say might have some merit if the normals could at least shut up about their inane wage slavery and pretend to be NEET. They can't. Whenever they show up on the board, they either feel the need to engage in dick waving or think that /jp/ is their blog. That's why anyone who has a job, goes to college/has gone to college in the past, or has completed high school shouldn't be allowed to post here.

Relax, OP. I live alone and I'm pretty messy. My mess got out of control so when my Dad did his yearly visit to my place, he was flabbergasted at how terrible everything was. Hell, I haven't had a working toilet since I moved in.

At my Grandmother's and Father's behest, I have an hour to pack up whatever I need right away before I am put into a mental ward of sorts.

Blogging on /jp/ isn't exactly a great use of that hour.

>>8597432
>>act stupid

My face when people still do this regardless of their education levels, career field, age, etc. No one is perfect I guess.

>>8597537
I'm guessing they don't have free Internet access at this ward...

We'll miss you, Anonymous. Do whatever it takes to get back soon!

>>8597537
How would a mental ward help anyone from /jp/?

>>8597608
I think they're meant to help society deal with the mentally ill more than to help the mentally ill.

>>8597556
Case in point: you.
I mean ever since you came back from killing iraqi babies you've been the worst shitposter this board has ever seen. (Save for tokiko.)

>>8597537
Wait until you see the kind of "help" you'll receive.

If it were me, I'd already be on the cross town bus with a backpack.

>>8597618
Now, now, anon, anti-psychotics and anti-depressants actually do work.

>>8597537
That's a bit extreme. Do you have any prior history of mental illness?

I'm thinking about becoming a security guard /jp/. I mean security guards have very minimal social interaction, the pay is good and you only need a little bit of training to get into it.

Good idea: y/n?

>>8593878

Rape a loli like they do in all those pedo doujins you read.

>>8597629
Bad idea. They usually prefer level headed blokes with little education, preferably fresh out of the military. At least where I live.
No one would want to hire an antisocial deviant as a security guard.

>>8597629
Fuck that. Why would you want to become a normalfag?

>>8597648
Why wouldn't you. Normalfags get all them delicious 3d waifus you know.

>>8597525

Selection bias. How many "normals" are on the board that are blending in just fine? You'll never know. All you see are people who claim to be NEET, people who claim to be normal, and people who don't make any claim about themselves whatsoever.

>>8597525
>That's why anyone who has a job, goes to college/has gone to college in the past, or has completed high school shouldn't be allowed to post here.
>or has completed high school
Dude, what

>>8596156
Well...you got off easier than I did, I guess.

During my first media scrum interning for CUP, I pitched a question to Jack Harris and completely fucking fumbled it.

And after I repeated the question, all 100 NDP party members in attendance laughed for a good three seconds.

And a video of it would up on Youtube.

Right now the views for it are in the high five figures. ;_:

>>8593918
>>8596274

>that feel when you can't even leave your house to pick up the materials needed to kill yourself

>>8598639
>that feel when >>>/v/

/jp/ is so scientific. Is it bad I imagine you all as Steins;Gate characters in these types of threads?

>>8598669
Yeah, because Kurisu is really unrealistic and Okabe is more like a poser conspiracy theorist idiot.

I still really liked the game though, since the premise of "what if one of those conspiracy retards really did stumble across some world-changing plot" was pretty much bound to be fun. It's just I definitely don't want to be Okabe since in real life he'd just be pathetic and not actually discover anything, and as I said Kurisu is unrealistic; she should have been in her late 20s since there is no way someone in this day and age could get published in fucking Science without even having their BS yet.

>>8598669
I come to /jp/ so that I can wave my B.A. and pretend that I made a good decision by equating all hard science majors with the trogs that troll here.

>>8598683
I agree, it's just fun to imagine /jp/ as a scientist. Maybe a toned down Okabe of sorts.

>>8598684

It seems few these days (especially underage on 4chan) remember, that anime was mostly considered an ultra-nerdy hobby back in the early 90s, before it became mainstream with Toonami etc. As in, you had to rent fansubbed VHS tapes by mail service etc. It's so bizarre being around from then and remembering that it used to be really cool to have an anime shirt, since such strange, then-mysterious interests were synonymous with nerds, and nerds were suddenly massively respected for bringing about the IT revolution and high tech all around. And of course, anime is usually the first step into getting into this culture overall, so, some of us are actually still around from that heyday, even here on /jp/.

The thing is, dorks, who are the worthless idiots people now associate otaku with, love to ape the patterns of nerds/geeks, because the dorks want to try to fit in among us. After all, it's extremely beneficial for a dork to be mistaken for a nerd, because nerds are perceived as having willfully withdrawn from society rather than being forcefully rejected from it, and to boot are often intellectuals as well, so it's an upgrade all around. I suppose what happened with anime is that, because it used to be seen as an ultra-nerdy thing, so many dorks latched onto it that now people seem more likely to mistake an otaku for a dork rather than the other way around. In other words dorks wrecked our image, just as they have done for many other formerly purely nerd/geek interests. Fuck dorks.

As a person who majored in comp sci, that industry is shit tier to work in unless you are working in a startup of 5 neckbeards or something.

average day at x successful company in silicon valley:
meeting with manager who has no idea what the fuck he is talking about
follow up meeting where the engineers make sense of the hand waving
follow up where the senior dev splits off work/design
work for 2 hours
pair programming on a hard problem
code reviews for me
code reviewing someone else
bug squashing and being bitched at until 5pm.

Honestly now that everyone is an 'engineer' you have to be extremely social. Unless you become an IT analyst at some hole in the wall.

I drive a UPS truck now. Good pay, terrible hours, minimal real interaction, but you do spend the whole day driving and shooting shit with people.

>>8598900
I forgot to mention: On top of all that bullshit if your job title has Computer, Software, Developer, etc in it and you make more than 70k they don't have to pay you any overtime because of loophole laws that were established in the .com bubble when devs were making $100/hr+ and wanting overtime pay.
So yeah, I actually make more than I did as a 5 year experienced dev (and as much as I would make as a senior dev) if you include the benefits package working far less.
Best of all you will be in way better shape than anyone who isn't a fitness nut without even trying.

>>8598900

That's why Dilbert strips are so funny.

>>8598921
>On top of all that bullshit if your job title has Computer, Software, Developer, etc in it and you make more than 70k they don't have to pay you any overtime because of loophole laws that were established in the .com bubble when devs were making $100/hr+ and wanting overtime pay.

Is this US-specific? What about Canada? That seems kind of bullshit.

>>8598900
>meeting with manager who has no idea what the fuck he is talking about

Why is he the manager, then? Wouldn't you need some kind of background in CS/Software Engineering/whatever if you're going to be managing something like that?

>>8600753
ideally yes, in reality most people in management either hate doing it and don't give a shit or wanted to be there in the first place. Neither type is really well suited for the job.

>>8598930
Fuck yeah Dilbert.

I have a Daily Dilbert add-on for firefox, been reading Dilbert strips everyday for the past few years. Love me some Dilbert.

>>8600817
Take your niggerspeak elsewhere, teenager.

>>8600753
No, because much of the upper management/executives are business people through and through. If you want a crude idea they are basically idea guys with connections who are good at convincing people and closing deals.
The real idea implementation planning happens with the engineering side which may have its own managers who act as the go between the executives and the senior dev who digests the information and makes a real plan with his team.
An engineer rising up will almost never become an upper level executive unless the company is really small, or they have lots of business experience and connections.

>>8600687
It most certainly is US specific. When I was a temp and went to work in Canada I got paid their contract wage which was about double my rate in the US. It might even be west coast specific for all I know since my bros on the east coast don't deal with it nearly as harsh 50 hours vs 70 hours avg in my location + field.
I already own a house in California so I'm not going to leave if I'm going to stay in the US.

>>8600945
>When I was a temp and went to work in Canada I got paid their contract wage which was about double my rate in the US.

Oh. That's reassuring. I'm in British Columbia right now and getting my CS degree. Which province were you working in?

>>8600945
So pretty much, if you're majoring in CS, get a job outside the US once you graduate?

>>8593882
exit bags aren't painless at all. You feel like you're suffocated very slowly and begin to lose your senses very slowly. It's super easy to panic

>>8601548
balloon time ain't for parasuicidal teens.

>>8593878
Oh you so attention whore. Not only do you want the attention of the 300 people that's going to watch you, but also of /jp/, where you trot your e-penis with your oooh research on WHO GIVES A FUCK.

You're not planning to kill yourself, you're just aiming to slam in our faces what "you've accomplished in life" while you get a laugh out of it.

>>8601560
Take it easy, good sir.

>>8601537
That only changes the pay, it doesn't change the fact that being a software developer at every level is an extremely social activity. Much more so than a standard engineer in pretty much every other sector but civil.
Your best bet would be IT if you want a low social, low pressure job. Like pretty much every engineering job you never actually leave work.