/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Applying for jobs. I don't want to be alone any more.

Spent 3 hours fucking around on flockdraw until some hipsters showed up with their fancy tablets and ruined it.

Now I'm going to bed in tears.

Trying my hardest not to kill myself. I hate my life. I only bring pain to those around me. even so, if I ended it, I would only bring more pain to those around me.

I bought some drinks, pizza, oranges, energydrinks and other goodies. My body is ready to play Dark Souls and other vidya all day. Though I might sleep a bit first because I havent bothered to do that yet. Actually before anything I better take a shower. Also if anyone wants to give me a haircut, please come over and do it. I'll even pay for it.

This will be the day I start going through my video game backlog.

Going to go visit my aunt at her estate in Monaco.

>>8442942
Good man. I mean to do that myself. I'm going to start with MGS4 and Sengoku Basara.

Procrastinate=>Masturbate=>Crushing loneliness=>Cry=>Hopeful thoughts(luckily)=>Try to get shit done=> Procrastinate.

>>8442939

If you want to stop causing pain to the people around you, you must change (or at least change the way others perceive you) -- that much is obvious. What is it that you're doing to upset these people? Are they close family, or just friends you see often?

Laying here like any other day. I'm waiting for a package so I won't be going out much. I got a gigantic pack of yeast at Costco a few weeks ago. Maybe I should really start making more bread. I'd love a scale so I can make consistent measurements.

>>8442956
Friends, family. I can't explain most of it, for fear of being called insane. But short story is that I have retracted so much from social life with others that it makes most of my family worry on a daily basis. I no longer find pleasure in social situations. I hate talking to others. But I hate being alone. It's this odd way of living that keeps me away from them. I just don't feel like living. Every day I look and see that the world is still shit and no one cares. I hate living. But I can't kill myself because I don't want to feel pain, both emotional and physical. I just feel null most of the day. I do nothing but sit on my on my computer, browsing this damn forum. I hate my life, but change will give me nothing. It'll just make me fake. I want to be innocent again, but I can never go back to being happy.

>>8442986
Its really creepy when other people describe me perfectly.

>>8442986

I can't give you any advice to help with how you feel, although I'm really sorry to hear it. Have you considered doing simple things like offering to make your parents tea/coffee (whichever they prefer) when you go downstairs to get a snack/drink, or telling your mother you love her more often? These things won't help with friends, but they should probably help with your parents. Works rather well for me. There isn't much point in trying to explain to your family that you enjoy your reclusive lifestyle, they won't understand (that sounds silly, but we both know it's true).

As far as your friends go, you claim not to enjoy social situations, which makes friends rather worthless, so I shalln't discuss those. Although if you still want friends, you always have on-line ones. :3

>>8442992
thanks for that bit of help. I've been trying to do that for a long time. I'll try to be there more. I only wish my mother would stop trying to convert me back to Christianity. No, I'm not some angsty teenage atheist.I've been trying to find my niche in paganism for three years now . That's another problem. And yes, I'm 18. Just got into college. Hate it. But regardless, you do speak true for the most part. I have one or two friends. I'll talk to them more.

Not your blog, reported, etc.

Reading, sleeping, saving images, whatever I want.

For now, the world is mine.

Have you ever self-harmed, /jp/? How do you deal with the urges to relapse? It's been years since I stopped, the scars are fading away, and I still have the urge to do it. Why is this happening again?
How do you stop it? Why won't the urge stop after all these years?

>>8443038
Fuck off emo faggot.

>>8443048
Negativity will not solve negativity.

The pencil was digging into my skin for a while.
It was painful but I felt a little better. But I don't want that. Why am I going through this again?

>>8443056
You should experience military life.

>>8442941
If you pay for the plane, I'll cut your hair for you.

>>8443038
>Why won't the urge stop after all these years?
As with all things once you have done them you lose the fear you had when you first though of doing it. That fear is what keeps people from doing illegal things and those in power uses it maintain control of society. You have already overcome that fear once, why stop now? you are closer to what every man wants to achieve than most will ever get. Go out and do those thing that others can't. You've already proven you have the resolve. Seize the opportunity, there are few that will rise to challenge you.

>>8443094
I don't want to do that. I just want to stop hurting myself.

I fapped with my left hand. Haven't done that in a while. It was neat, but I'm not sure I prefer it.

Any tips on overcoming masturbation addiction?

If I just stop masturbating, my thoughts will get even more lewd, and if I try masturbate often and quickly to get the urge out the way, my libido will increase to make up for the demand.

Try substitute something for masturbation. I suggest some sort of violent activity.

>>8443116
Why would you want to give up one of the only few pleasures in life?

>>8443148
masturbation is usually pretty violent.

>>8443151
I don't want to stop doing it completely. I want to stop doing it from 18:00 to 02:00 every day.

>>8443116
I masturbate 3 times a day, everyday, averaging 45min for each time. And I'm still able to do all the shit that I want, such as improving my execution on fighting games, grinding out levels in hentaiverse, etc.

Just plan ahead and manage your time better. Masturbation shouldn't be a problem.

>>8443158
People can have a heart attack if they masturbate a lot.

>>8443189
Then why am I not dead? Lucky?

Just curious. And how much is a lot?

>>8443191
I don't know, but I read few stories about it.
Also, it depends on person if they have poor heart conditions.

I guess I'm technically no longer a NEET because I work now but I still feel the same when I didbt. After work, I just come home and lay down either on 4chan or playing games. I thought being exposed to the outside world would change that.

Perfume of love

I'm going to go to /r9k/, where this shit is actually appropriate to post. You should all join me.

>>8443305
If you meet people and spend time with them, maybe you'll change because even if you don't want it, you will be influenced by them.
With your work, I guess you buy more figures and all so it's not a bad thing.

I was going to apply for a job today, but ended up procrastinating. Next week I'll do it for sure.

http://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm8047443

>>8443623
You'll procrastinate next week huh?

Kinda getting bored of my job, I think I'll take monday off and be a hikki for a little while.

>>8443661
A hikikomori is a long-term shut-in.

>>8443661
4/10 made me reply with a reaction image

>>8443760
>>8443763
I thought he was just showing his distaste for the the normalfags in this thread by parodying their behavior. Which I guess would be kinda autistic of him, but not unexpected.

I wanna play on the PS3, but don't wanna go down stairs just to play it.

I'll masturbate and contemplate the idea of getting a job to meet new people but in the end I'll just masturbate and browse the internet like I always do.

To some it's a sad life, to me it's a decent life. The crushing loneliness hasn't kicked in yet because I own a large variety of pets who will keep me company until my final days.

Today morning was very depressing but later I decided to go see few interesting places and later I had to call school and ask few things.

I was delaying getting a job because I saved some money, I was aiming for places that would reject me but one of those faggots hired me and ruined my current lifestyle. It seems he knew my father in the university, and they were good friends. At least I can buy games with the money