/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Kill it with fire.

Cover it with a box. Securely. Forget it even exists.

Eat the mushrooms and ask Jesus what to do.

>>7897033
that would lead to him breathing in the toxic fumes thus killing him

>>7897035
I already did that, with a blanket...for 1 year.

It's time I fucking go commando and kill that shit. I'm too poor to afford one of those trash guys and I wouldn't even know if they are the right people to call for dealing with mutations and hybrid shroompeople and molemonsters

Listen here. It's time to man up and engage in some chemical warfare. Get yourself latex gloves, chlorine, a sponge and a mask. Play some appropriate music and go exterminate those horrors.

I wish I could leave food rotting on my floor. I get an ant infestation if there are even crumbs around.

If you could manage, you really should try to call for some kind of cleaning agency.
That shit can really hurt your health. The fungus floats in the air you know, and if not as simple as severe asthma, it could do worse, and be potentially life threatening if you just let it lie around even more years.

>>7897039
I got some Requiem For a Dream music on loop.

But I'm still too scared to lift that blanket. I mean, bugs scare the shit out of me. What if there are shroompeople mutations under that blanket man? What if I pass out and they all crawl on me and lay eggs in my skin.

FFFFUUU

>>7897046
Armor yourself! secure the neck and sleeves so creepy crawlies can't crawl!

And play something less dramatic and more hardcore, dammit! You can't get energetic with Requiem for a Dream! Loop some Demetori or something, that's what I play when I clean around the house.

>>7897051
thanks you're really helpful btw

>>7897054
CLEANING IS HARDCORE! YOU HAVE TO BE HARDCORE! YOU HAVE TO FIGHT THE FILTH! YOU ARE THE LORD OF THE APARTMENT! YOU ARE THE BIOHAZARD!

Good luck, OP.

if you think that's bad you should see my shower. at first I thought that cleaning it would be too much trouble, but now it looks like a fucking cave and I'm afraid that if I scrape all the shit off the wall it would clog the drain.

>>7897051

Got a dl link for all of Demetori stuff?

>>7897060
Impressive. Could you make a drawing?

Sorry but you don't know SHIT about being disgusting until you've seen this video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdnQ0nO3AcY

"How to grill steak without a grill"

>>7897034
this person doesn't know what he's talking about

fire would kill the toxic spores so you wouldn't get hurt, just have a fire extinguisher ready and a cloth over your breathing area. When you're done try and air out the room. If completed successfully your room should smell like a moldy campfire. Best of luck!

>>7897030
Get a paint respirator with an organic filter. Get rubber gloves and overalls. Costs around $50 at a hardware store.

Then remove it.

Sterilize it.

Paint over it.

>>7897076
No. I've done studies on growth spores from unattended food rations and bacterial growth. At some point if he continues to breathe in the toxic fumes coming from the fungus in the corner of his room he will have convulsions in his sleep, followed by night terrors, heat rashes. Eventually the fumes will be too much for his lungs and he will die in his sleep.

>>7897075
I remember that. That video is so fascinating.

>>7897086
The sad part is he's not even trolling

Dem fucking crocs man

>>7897080
wait, i just moved into a place and am having those symptoms

Gather companions, preferably a healer, fighter, and magic user. Before you go in, bring lots of antidotes and heal potions. Don't be afraid to run away when you're low on HP. There's nothing cowardly about a tactical retreat. When you defeat the mushrooms, be polite and split the gold pieces and dropped items among party members.

How to grow awesome mushrooms in your house in a few easy steps!!!

1. Go to the nearest McDonalds and order six number 3s, four number 5's, two number 1's, a Vanilla shake, six Sugar cookies, one Dr Pepper, one Sweet Iced Tea, and 17 packets of Ranch and BBQ sauce.
2. Throw them into a corner of a room of your choosing
3. Wait about 7 days. (about 10 days on cold weather)
4.?????????
5. Profit - Enjoy huge mushrooms growing in the corner of your room. Remember to keep constantly feeding it with more of the things shown in (Step 1). It's a good topic starter or something to tell your kids.

How can you even live with yourself?

Shit's nasty bro.

http://archive.easymodo.net/jp/thread/7847397#p7848065

Delicious kopipe

>>7897107
How is that a kopipe? It seems like he just elaborated on the conditions of his room.

what the fuck am i reading

I have laminate flooring.
Cleaning up any spill or mess is easy with a kitchen towel or tissue.

>>7897066
imaging your typical shower/bath combo. now imagine it with black shit all over the walls and curtain. for a while it was pretty thick like fucking moss or something, but then I guess it died or got too heavy or something and most of it fell off in big clumps. it seems to be in recession now, but it stil completely covers the tile. I think I'm going to have to put a tarp in the bottom of the tub and go at the shit with bleach and a brush.

Why, OP, aren't you lucky? Just remember to check if it has cat ears first.

>>7897110
If you mean elaborated by adding
>Not to mention the endless amount of mutations that would be exposed if I tried to clean it.
>What can I do?
at the end then sure

>>7897113
How does it even get like that? What the hell.

>>7897112
Trust me buddy, this would be considered a *lot* more than just "a mess"

CLR kills any living thing dumber than your average Canadian.

Fucking powderbomb it.

>>7897118
Fuck you for posting that.

Throw your cat under it and hold the blanket down for 45 seconds.

If your cat comes out alive, it should be fine for cleaning with no hybrid shroompeople.

If you cat doesn't come out, or comes out with a look of shame and horror then run away and call 911

>>7897121
... Common Language Runtime?

I admit that some of them are messy, but nothing to be killed over.

>>7897127
You should have read biologist anons/national geographic anons like five post series on his dream of a fungi girl based harem visual novel.

It was freaking amazing.

All NEETs must first challenge the local wildlife for the habitat. There can only be one.

You're already dead, the spores are like the dangerous part and you've been breathing them for years.

>hybrid shroompeople

Every single time.

>>7897137
Calcium Lime Rust.

Its an abrasive powder used to clean things that have had eons of life die on them.

reminds me of that one cowboy bebop episode

Get evicted

Seriously, you've damaged the property at this point in a manner similar to what the mental cripple in that fake news story about the "Poop Monster" did to his chair or sofa or whatever it was

and they'll need to hire a biohazard team to clean your crap out once you're safely in jail for this shit.

Now get out of /jp/ and back to 7chan/b/, you are hereby given minus-14 days notice to get the fuck out, so go back to the week before last and quit posting at that point, 'kay?

Bye, now.

>>7897141
An update on that
My landlord called demanding $1200 for the cleaning people and repairs, and an exterminator.

Fuck him he got my deposit.

>7chan/b/
>mfw I dont even know what the fuck this is

Bust a fat load on it and see if it mutates.

Make a video and put it on youtube.

People eat that shit up like type moon fans on a new saber fig

Jesus and I thought the mold spots growing in my shower were bad. My apartment's nice, though. They'll send out a guy if you think you have mold and they'll clean it for free.

I'm just too lazy to call for now, I'll wait a year and see what happens.

Cover your nose/mouth with something and just start cleaning.

>>7897161
As mentioned before man, it's not even about smelling it for me. For me it's just about looking at it.

I mean fucking bugs and cockroaches scare the SHIT out of me. Imagine me looking at some molding fungus creature crawling and different types of life forms with crawly legs and shit UGHHHHHHHH Im fucking giving myself shivers and goosebumps

>>7897164
Can you take a picture of the blanket?

>>7897168
will do. give me 5 minutes

you guys wanna see some shit?

so I'm cleaning my room and see what look like little pieces of lint...but they're moving.

I notice they're actually little worm things and they give off a distinct sulfur smell when squished. still have no clue what they were.

>>that feel after reading thread

>>7897179
>>7897183
>>7897185
dude what the fuck

thats disgusting

also >mfw that floor probably used to be white

>>7897179
woops, first picture was upside down. here you go.

>>7897185
Dude does that thing eat your pubes?

It's fucking shitting out pubes.

>>7897183
Are those maggots covered in dust?

>>7897179
Is that green thing the blanket?

>>7897179
>>burning your anime on CD-Rs

Whoa I did that too back in the day.

Also dear god that carpet used to be brown.

Elbow-length gloves. Rubberized boots. Filter mask, or since you're poor, paper. Tongs. Trash bags. Paper towels. Bucket. Bleach. An appropriately energizing film score, preferably one that accompanies the war preparation montage where people grab their gear, buckle their belts, secure their swords, lock and load, adjust their caps, and all the rest. Something that tells that mess it's about to meet its maker. Which would be you.

Lots of bleach.

>>7897190
OP here, that's actually not me.

This is completely some other anon

>>7897191
yeah, goes to show you how long the room remained uncleaned, seeing how these pictures are from last year.

/sp/ in the house

just dropping by to say you niggas are fucking disgusting

NIGGA FOREVER ALONE

>>7897200
suck my cock dude

Nuke it from orbit.

>>7897200
Suck my dick. My house is cleaner than Baby Jesus.

Will we arrive
In our time ♪

At the dawn
of a dirty durrhurr ♪

>>7897200

Why is /sp/ some sort of yellowish green spic?

>>7897210
OH MY GOD

ITS A FUCKING CONSPIRACY

THE WHOLE TIME THEY WERE THE HYBRATING SHROOMPEOPLE

THEY ARE THE FUNGUS

/sp/ you sneaky asshole

>>7897188
OH SHIT DUDE IS THAT A JINX POKEMAHN CARD?

>>7897200
>2011
>not using a jizztub
That's how you guys say that meme right

Take off the blanket and rub the rotting mess all over your dick.

>>7897214
That's weak shit dude.

My sink is clogged from endless amounts of semen and hair. That door is foreverclosed.

The stench is unbearable but Im proud of my cum sink

>>7897193
It's been more than 5 minutes. You okay?

Try to talk to it. Maybe it developed sentience.

>>7897214
>second half of 2011
>still using >2011

>>7897218
sinks go out of commission pretty fast...
and there's the splatter because it's close

>>7897220
I think he fucking died dude.

I told him not to breathe in the the fucking air. I hope you know this anons death will rest on your conscience.

>>7897225
Oh yeah??

Well I used to cum in water balloons and throw them at joggers at night.

>2011
>not posting in /sp/

>2011
>being a weaboo faggot

>>7897226
How rude of him to die before he posted the pictures.

>>7897231

> 2011
> Playing football on the day 2 planes changed america forever

>>7897235
yeah, what a fucking douchebag

> 2011
> Posting about sports instead of going outside and playing it.

finally truNEETs who belong

>>7897236
>>7897241

>2011
>leaving a space between the arrow and text when greentexting

OP's

*cough*

>>>/v/110973670

OH OP YOU SO WACKY

>mfw /sp/ nerd near me tries to prove that he can get laid
you guys are lucky that your parents clean shit after you, unlike some of us.

>>7897246
I think someone just reposted it on /v/. It'll probably spread around over the next 30 hours.

>>7897245
DUDE WAHT THE FUCK

>>7897245
Yum, a tub full of pulled pork!

/r/ that one /sp/ troll pic with the anime girls riding the troll car (it had Saber on it I think).

>>7897246
Check out the times dude. /v/ is stealing out content again.

>>7897213
probably.

>>7897253

>>7897258
Awesome pic.

>>7897252
butchered jr. sudo

>>7897147
>doesn't own an apartment
>2011

OP here,

I just posted this to troll but Im honestly kinda mad that /v/ took my material

I wish I could copyright this shit

>>7897310
then...you lied to us?

and for a moment I thought you belonged, OP.

>>7897328
b..but you guys are pretty cool ass people

can i hang out for a lil bit?

>>7897343
no.

>>7897343
I guess. Just don't touch anything that...actually, just don't touch anything.

>>7897075
Jesus Christ, this looks identical at 99% -carpet, money, lamp, plates, filth, same country- to a friend's apartment of mine. I am scared now.

>>7897097
dude, mcdonalds?
I had a teacher throw a cheeseburger from that place up on top of a bookshelf at the beginning of the semester and at the end he took it down and it looked the goddamn same. So many preservatives in that food man

>>7897075
>>7897075
>>7897075
How the fuck did I miss this video.

For those who dont want to watch a 10 minute video, just watch the first few seconds. You will watch it all the way through after seeing a few seconds.

I'm under the impression there are two kinds of NEETs. Ones who leave old soda and trash out for so long it grows fungus, and those who are so neat and orderly they wouldn't be able to sleep if something was out of place.

I'm the latter.

>>7897396
it is possible for there to be a neet that is between those extremes

>>7897381
I dunno man. Real deal autistic guy living alone isn't as funny as /jp/ makes it out to be.

More depressing than anything. Poor guy.

>>7897381
I love the sudden fires.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w46Dwh4TMGA

>>7897435
autism is a serious medical condition after all

>>7897505
WHAT THE FUCK

WHO FUCKING LIKE BUILT THAT ROOM?

like how the FUCK is the sink, the stove, and parts of the kitchen so close to the toilet?

I DONT GET IT

he's wearing crocs man

he's got to be a troll

OP is becoming plague bearer.

>>7897524
you'de be surprised how comfortable they are

>>7897505
The fires are funny.

At the end he talks about going back to his house? I wonder if he lives off an inheritance + autism bucks combo or something.

>>7897558
Nope. He's pretty famous over on the SA forums, dude holds a law degree, speaks like 5 languages or some crazy shit, and has lived all over the world in different places.

http://www.weebls-stuff.com/songs/Shrooms/

You people horrify me. I'm a neat freak, OCD, germaphobe and I just finished dusting but now I think I have to go over everything twice more with enough chlorine to kill my lungs with fumes. I have to sanitize my hands just for typing in this thread.

>>7897741
Enjoy your weak immune system, moron.

>>7897746

I was plenty dirty and careless as a kid and built up a good immune system. I rarely ever get sick. As a matter of fact I have Hashimoto's Thyroiditus which means my immune system is attacking my own thyroid.

It is just that I like a tidy environment and always have. The OCD sanitization mostly comes from seeing disgusting shit like this on the internet, also other gross pics such as gore and scatology (you bastard trolls who post those sorts of things!), and I just can never feel clean again. I can't even feel satisfaction in the shower knowing I am in a small enclosed room also containing a receptacle for excrement.

oh my fucking god