/jp/ - Otaku Culture

a gun wouldn't help

She'd just dodge all the bullets.

>>7815548

Good thing my computer is the only worth while thing to steal.

I can even get my computer back from her when I show up in Gensokyo after being murdered.

I can always use THAT.

Why would she want to kill though? That's not like her.

>>7815548

>>7815548
and that's why you use a coldsteel brand claymore for home defense

>>7815571

She knows people have been fapping to her and she doesn't like. Murder is how she expresses this dislike.

MASUTAAAA SUPAAAAAAAAAAAKU

The bullets, gun, me, the wall behind me and the neighbor's house get blown away. Guns are useless.

;_;

>>7815571
What if you had no books? I bet she would be likely to Master Spark your face, or spam stars at you.
And what good would a gun do, OP?

Batman doesn't use guns.
Shiki doesn't use guns.
Shirou doesn't use guns.
Reimu doesn't use guns.

Why should I use a gun?

>>7815548

Nice post anon.

A gun is useless. Liquid nitrogen, on the other hand...

>>7815601
You aren't Batman, Shiki, Shirou, or Reimu

*concentrate*
*mutter*
*aim*
*unleash*
That's all it takes for Marisa to break into your house with the intent to rob and kill you. Why don't you own a gun?

I wish to take Marisa out to the shooting range.

Do you think she could handle a deagle?

>Implying I don't own an AA12 with door breaching rounds.

I'm sure she's never seen a penis. I could use mine as a weapon.

>>7815609

This guy has a point. A liquid nitrogen trap would kill her before she could do anything.

If Touhou's on the loose were a real concern, I'd be more afraid sudden nuclear holocaust.

>>7815623
>Implying that'd do jack shit.

>>7815639
Why does her nose go into her face, rather than out of?

Touhou in the real world would cause an apocalypse in no time. Guns are completely useless.

>That's all it takes for Marisa to break into your house with the intent to rob and kill you.

So Marisa is a nigger?

>>7815644

That's called a shadow.

>>7815650
It's funny 'cause that's sorta the opposite of canon.

Marisa would Master Spark you for the fun. After that, your valuable objects would be trown into a pile.

Throw glock at marisa,
receive insurance policy.
Be set for life from disability.

>>7815623
>>7815636

Go back to /v/ with your >implying shit.

>>7815665
>buttranged mad nerd

>>7815681

lmao u mad super virgin loser?

>>7815674

Fuck off retard.

>>7815683

Trying too hard o fit in.

>>7815692
>I am so rear wrecked and posterior pained

But I have six.

>>7815694

You can't imitate /jp/'s autistic slang, stop trying so hard.

>>>/v/

>>7815701
>lmao I am so anal devastated I'll just redirect him to /v/ epic win!

Bullshit aside, why are you such a faggot, and why do you keep replying to me?

You kids need to stop. This isn't kindergarten.

But it IS /jp/.

But I do own guns, three of them. Sadly for Marisa, the only way she could get to me in my room is a narrow staircase just big enough for one person. I could stick a gun around the corner and open up without aiming and I would hit her guaranteed, it's that narrow. If she survived getting shot, she could spend her days in a fun side room in my basement. I'll take care of her.

THROW A BUCKET OF WATER ON HER

>>7815993
I'd make a "which Touhou would you sexually torture after shooting her while she attempted to burglarize your home" thread, but that's a ban I don't feel like dealing with.

>>7815993
You scare me,
You honestly think you're thin hallway is going to keep a danmaku master like Marisa from dodging your bullet? Or even besides that, that she'd need to walk down the hallway in the first place? She can level your entire house in a second.

>>7816018
Kind of counter-intuitive to obliterate the house you're trying to rob, isn't it?

>>7816018
she'd probably just deathbomb anyway

>>7815993
>I'll take care of her.
Do tell.
No really, elaborate. I love me some literary fapping material.

Take it easy, /jp/.

Dodge this bitch

>>7816023
We're talking about Marisa "coming for him," not stealing.

>>7816023
>master_spark_flowchart.jpg
There will be more houses.

>>7816028
Those aren't nearly enough for a Stage 1 Boss.

>>7816030

You mean this?

I searched for Boof but got no entries. Where'd you go? I miss you so. It's seems like it's been forever since you've been gone.

>>7816018

It's not a hallway, it's a steep, straight, narrow, staircase. Even if she was flying up the thing, there is very little overhead.

>>7816021

I would keep her well fed, she would have a TV, a toilet, a couch. Aside from being raped daily, I would try to make life as easy as possible for her.

...grrrr...all right, /jp/, you caught her. What're you gonna do now?

>>7816066
Leave her there until she wets herself.

>>7816066
Give her juice, lots of it.
Then wait.

>>7816058
Marisa can use magic, even without her hakkero. What's stopping her from blasting her way out?

>>7816070
>>7816071
Then what?

>>7816075
Juice in, juice out.

my revenge is complete

>>7816074
Keep Sacchin tied up next to Marisa with Depletion Garden active. Problem solved.

>>7816078
Feh. Boring.

>>7816083

Actually she seems rather pleased.

http://hijiribe.donmai.us/post/show/639410/-absurdres-blonde_hair-blush-braid-hat-have_to_pee

Now I want to fap to Marisa being sexually abused.

>>7816075
Wait for her to do it again and again and again and again

>>7816096
Couldn't Marisa just untie her?

>>7816102
Tie up Marisa too.

>>7816106
But that contradicts what >>7816058 was saying.

>Ur...gah-aaaaah...gaahRK-...h-urg...h-help...aaagh...

>>7816074

That's where shock collars come in. You ever feel how much electricity those give off? It's enough to take the fight out of you. Not as bad as a taser, but it's enough to knock you on your ass. Sure, she can blow a hole in the wall, but all I have to do is hold down a button and watch her fall to her knees. I suppose I should have addressed that earlier, until I know she is not going to do try something stupid, certain precautions would have to be taken.

>>7816124
>Not as bad as a taser

You do not know what you are talking about.

>>7816124
You're underestimating her.
She is really fucking fast; she could probably take out your collar controler (or you) before you could react. Or, If it means escaping from your constant rape, she could grit her teeth through the electricity and kill you.

>>7816052
Nah, mine was an actual flowchart. There was a Walfas sprite to the left of it. Everything ended in Master Spark.

God damn, /jp/. What'd she ever do to you?

>>7816127

Oh really? For shits and giggles, I wore a shock collar that a friend of mine bought for his dog. He only had it on medium and gave me a little burst of electricity. Needless to say it sobered me up real quick.

>>7816181
Yes really. You don't go from normal human to Reimu's rival and STAY THERE without taking some serious hits.
Marisa can endure your shock collar at LEAST long enough to flick her wrist and magic you to pieces.

>>7816181
Have you been tasered before?

In the good old days, these threads would be full of guro and rape and abuse and stuff. I miss this days.

>>7816213

Well, I'm not going to argue with that. Gensokyo is a different world with different standards.

>>7816222

Nope. Although I have an idea of what it feels like.

Would you guys really do stuff like this? Would you really rape a crying little girl as she begs you to let her go home?
And in Marisa's case, whispers "I will kill you someday..." every time you lock her back in her cell?

I would try to seduce her.

Then again I'm very shy and I'm not very honest with my feelings so it would go nowhere. Nevermind. I guess I would just masturbate before she killed me and let her watch me in shame or something.

>>7816266
what's to stop her from master sparking you into a queer little cinder?

>>7816279
No hakkero.
I mean if you had the chance, would you really do things like this.

Why would Marisa try to kill you? Going in to people's houses and murdering them isn't her style at all.

>>7816249
The thing about being tasered is that you can have infinite pain tolerance and you will still literally collapse on the spot because your nerves are actually unable to transmit any messages from your brain to your muscles.

I own hundreds.

>>7816316

I don't doubt that, people have died from tasers.

After reading this thread, I wanted to fap to Marisa abuse. The first thing I came up with was this: http://exhentai.org/g/374313/086a858787/

I no longer want to fap and I feel terrible to boot. God damn it.

>>7816340
>http://exhentai.org/g/374313/086a858787/

sankyu~

>>7816340
The only Touhou H I ever look at is the stuff that somebody tells me is horrible and depressing as shit so I go to see how just depressing it is.

No, I don't fap to it.

>Why don't you own a gun?

Nyan...

>>7815537

I've been preparing for that day all my life, OP.

>Would you really rape a crying little girl as she begs you to let her go home?

Like that's not exactly how I want her to react. She will make it home in time, and she can continue her life of theft as she did.

>>7816417
T-then why do we have to go through the...um, rape and stuff? Can't we just skip to the end?

>>7816425

I didn't mean her release would be immediate, just that it would happen and she could continue her life. I have no desire to kill her, I actually like her, she just chose the wrong house.

>>7816444
...how long would you keep her, then? What would you do to her?

Gensokyo is Marisa's dissociative fantasy she fled to while enduring years of rape in a fat pedo's basement.

>>7816451

As I said previously, I would keep her in good health and probably rape her everyday. As for how long, as long as she made things easy for me, I would make things easy for her. Maybe 6 months, maybe less, I get bored easily.

Implying Marisa would kill me. We would just proceed to have sweet sex.

>>7816389
Nice airsoft guns.

I wish Marisa would break into my house and kill me ;_;

>>7816461
S-six...
No! No way! Absolutely not!
Come on, we can work something out! She's...resourceful! She could find you some rare item or rob a bank for you or brew you up some magic or something or ANYTHING! Just don't do this! Please!

>>7816461
S-six...
No! No way! Absolutely not!
Come on, we can work something out! She's...resourceful! She could find you some rare item or rob a bank for you or brew you up some magic or something or ANYTHING! Just don't...don't do this! Please, PLEASE don't do this to her! She's sorry! She's so sorry!

>>7816483
Stop RP-ing with the delusional fuck

>>7816483

Well, if you really want to stay you can, but at this point, I am going to be sticking straightened out paper clips into your urethra. It's your choice.

>>7816465

>Nice airsoft guns.

Bolts are open on all the rifles. Ask BOOF, he is a gunsmith. It's all legit (except maybe the G36, that is actually just a ruger in an aftermarket stock from Archangel).

What made you think they were airsoft?

>>7816505
...
Aaah...waaaaaah...
...why are you doing this? I...I don't even...I didn't...

>>7816505
That's going to be a long 6 months.

>>7816517

Maybe a misquote to the one under yours?

We'd most likely need "legendary weapons" or blessed bullets to take out Touhou girls.

>>7815537
i'll just rape her.
>>7816266
yes i would. and she wouldn't survive enough to execute any revenge. i got bored easily, huh.

>>7816549
I have a hammer I dug up a long time ago.

Its rusty and ancient and awesome.

It'll protect me from those monsters.

I rather like the idea of catching a Marisa, especially pic related version.

Hopefully she learns to enjoy her daily anal rape.

What about conceptual weapons?
I don't even understand what those are, but they sound like they might be useful.

>>7816565
Glamour Marisa > Cho Marisa

>>7816549
Marisa is just an ordinary magician. A blow to the skull from any heavy object will do.

>>7816565

That's not Marisa, that's Yukari playing dressup.

Aw, he ditched me. Probably for the best.
Sorry 'bout that, /jp/. Old habits die hard.

>>7816591

I have no idea what you're talking about~

>>7816595

That person playing Marisa who was half-way to cybering? That's too bad, I kinda wanted to see where that went.

>>7816619
No, that was me.
>half-way to cybering
I'd never go all the way, honestly. I'm not that far gone.

>>7816626

Now wheres the fun in that? You need to put your whole heart into these things!

>>7816638
You're not going to change my mind about this.

>>7816641

You're already on /jp/. What more do you have to lose?

>>7816641
You're afraid of doing it out in the open. Hit me up at 9inches73@hotmail.com when you're ready to take it further. I'm lubed and ready all day.

>>7816650
see >>7816641

>>7816652

I don't think that's actually going to work.