/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>7804505
Who are you, and what are you trying to achieve?

0 0 9 6 2 2 5 1 2 1 1 0 8 1 0 5

i'm tired of this image

>>7804507
there was a guy on these forums I used to read that used to get up in arms about people there liking cp and that is all he ever posted about.

Then one day he went crazy and started posting cp to prove they liked cp.

How is this related, IDK, but weird guy spamming threads is probably crazy too.

>>7804515
Maybe when he's asking about our problems, he really wants our sympathy and advice for his own.

>>7804514
Really? It's just starting to grow on me.

>>7804515
What was the name of the forum?

>>7804514

The list is long but the two Most major and constant ones are Major depression and Social anxiety. I get medication for that stuff but going on/off with them all the time aint too smart, but I still do it.

>>7804557
You forgot autism.

is loneliness a mental disorder?

I'm autismal as fuck.

I want to be a trap and know what it's like to be cummed inside ;_;

...I'm serious.

Compulsion, I see a terrible thread but it grinds my sanity not to post.

>>7804603
complete the first step and /jp/ will take care of the rest

if you aren't ugly

>>7804615
I'm not ugly but I don't have a feminine body ;_;

But it's not really overly masculine either...

POMF =3

>>7804622
Well if you're wearing a maid outfit I shouldn't be able to see most of your body, so it's no big deal.

>>7804626
I've always wanted a maid outfit...

>>7804624
>implying I don't already know what we're going to do on the bed.

lolicon, duh

>>7804548
It was the 2nd videogame board on something awful.

I'm a self absorbed schizoid pedophile with a capacity for antisocial behavior.

Neurotypicals need to vacate the board.

None of this "self-diagnosed" shit, I have been clinically diagnosed by more than one psychiatrist as bipolar type 2 with borderline personality disorder tendencies, and pedophilia. Oh, and I also have a circadian rhythm disorder.

Yeah, my life is pretty shitty.

Lolicon, if that's a mental disorder. I also think I may be bi-polar, but that's self-diagnosed so it's probably bullshit.

Im anti social and a bit of an asshole but I feel my lack of motivation is my biggest let down in life. All i feel is depression when i realize that my goals in life will never be accomplished.

paranoid schizophrenic aspie

>>7804505
>What are your mental disorders, /jp/?
In all seriousness, I am taking a series of tests this week to find out exactly this.
I'm guessing we'll learn that it's a combination of panic disorder and some "autism spectrum" traits, with my depression being a symptom of the panic disorder and not a cause unto itself.

I'm looking forward to it. After all, I want to know what my problem is as much as anyone.

>>7804761
How did you go about arranging this.

I'd see a psychologist if it were Flan

Bipolar disorder. really bad too

when I was on my meds I was perfectly fine, but since I've been off my meds I've tried to kill myself, broken my fist/wrist on a wall, and have wrecked a few keyboards/controllers/mice

Flan's tummy looks so smooth.

>>7804761
the hell?

>>7804761
>>7804767
I would also like to know how you went about arranging something like that. I hate self-diagnosing because it makes me feel like a hypochondriac.

No one can save you, /jp/. Just end it all.

Bipolar disorder runs in my family, really severely or something. Damn near everyone on my mom's side is on meds for it and some of my dad's side. I've seen some of them off em, it's not a pretty sight..
But I'm naturally easygoing and it takes a lot to get me in a bad mood so it skipped me or something. And I'm extremely thankful or whatever for it.

I had a job basically handed to me by my mom's friend and I didn't show up to the interview. I am tired of letting my parents down. I don't want to work and I don't want to leech off of them. I think my only other option is Gensokyo.

My current plan is DBANing my hard drives, writing the note, and duct taping the garage doors & windows while I leave my car running inside it. Is there anything I'm forgetting?

>>7804839
Modern cars (80's and newer?) have a monitor that turns off the engine if the carbon monoxide levels get above a certain point.

>>7804839
Go on a PCP binge and take a few thousand people down with you.

>>7804845
why would you tell him? Think about the hilarity that would ensue after he wasted a shit ton of gas only for nothing to happen.

>>7804839
I know that feel bro.

I had a job handed to me by my aunt, working at hospital no less, and I threw that away because I was afraid of failure. I worked through the month and a half of training and fucked up quite a few times on all sorts of things, then on the day before my first actual day by myself, I called my manager and told her I quit.

I spent the next year doing nothing before I found a job at a fast food place. There I worked 5 days of training (fucking up pretty good the whole time) and quit again before my first day, again because I was afraid of failure.

I told my parents I got fired from the job for a no-call/no-show because I didn't want them to think I was a complete failure.

I'm going to try hanging myself, but the car thing sounds good too. Just make sure to write a note when you do it!

>>7804853
Leave something on your suicide note, like "I cannot live in a world where Jersey Shore exists"

>>7804853

The World will always welcome you back, Anon.

Don't let fear cripple you. The very fact that you can type with decent spelling and grammar indicates you are far above the general populace in terms of intelligence. There are plenty of people out there who are as bad or worse than you, so don't be afraid of failure. Don't kill yourself, anon.

>>7804839
same here. had a fantastic job (got enough money to buy a ps3) but ended up quitting after 5 months, I don't even know why, i think it was the anxiety and pressure.

i'd love to get a new job but i'm afraid ive been a NEET for too long for anyone to hire me. i might just end up going to gensokyo if i can't find a new one by the end of the year

I wish I could afford a car so I could use it to kill myself.

Fucking richfags.

>>7804851
Not the guy you replied to, but inhalation of even a moderate amount of carbon monoxide in airtight space can lead to permanent brain damage and other horrible effects.

>>7804853
>>7804839
You would be better off with a charcoal stove. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charcoal-burning_suicide

>>7804515
Being unable to accept your own love for cp because society has successfully brainwashed you into thinking its wrong has got to cause some mental strain, especially when faced with those more free than you.

>>7804812
I want to poke her tummy, if you know what i mean.

Why do you keep posting with that image? It gives me an erection and I don't like it.

>>7804858
>i'd love to get a new job but i'm afraid ive been a NEET for too long for anyone to hire me.
Whenever they ask me at a job interview "so, what have you been doing since you got out of high school?" a pang of fear goes down my spine

I usually just say "I've been looking for a job" to which they usually respond "For 5 years?" and I just say "Yep"

I have had 3 interviews in the last 6 months and haven't managed to find a job yet.

>>7804853
>>7804839
You two should consider going to the government for help. Maybe you can get onto disability.

>>7804887
So, what have you actually been doing since you got out of high school?

>>7804767
>How did you go about arranging this.
>>7804821
>I would also like to know how you went about arranging something like that. I hate self-diagnosing because it makes me feel like a hypochondriac.
During a routine check up I spoke to my doctor about it. She pointed my to psychologist/psychiatrist/shrink.
I made an appointed with the psych and he recommend a second psych that specialized in the assburgers. Second psych spoke with me for a while, and said she'd like a more thorough evaluation.
That wasn't euphemistic.
So now I'm scheduled to take a test that will take two hours over two days. It just happens that the day is today.

Medical insurance was pretty damn essential. I'm lucky enough to have a supportive family that can afford to put me through this shit. If you don't have that, you might be able to skip to taking the test just by telephoning psychologists and asking them directly that you want to have such a test done.

Don't be afraid to ask if they'll work probono. Some of them will actually say yes, because they want to help people more than they want money, or because the government gives them a tax rebate. One or the other.

During any period of all that you might be prescribed some pills. Go ahead and take them, but while they might help it probably won't help enough.
Occasionally pills will make you flat out crazy, though, so be on the look out for that.

Don't kill yourselves, you'll increase /jp/'s ratio of insufferable people

>>7804856
>The World will always welcome you back, Anon.
I know they will, but my fear of failure often drives me to overthink things and fail even more. It's a horrible cycle that leads to me getting really anxious/depressed and quitting my job then sulking for a few months. I just want to break the cycle.

>>7804890
No. That would make me feel even worse than I already do. I would feel subhuman and even more worthless than I do now. Also what would I list as my reason for receiving disability? Fear of fucking up?

I was always like most of you, shy asocial, then a NEET, etc... Then my parents kicked me out of home. Now, I'm homeless(brought my laptop with me), with no diploma, experience, or friend, and too depressed and suicidal to do anything about it. Malnutrition doesn't help either.

What should I do? Can any of you adopt me? I live in Canada. I guess I could be your maid or something.

>>7804901
Beats being dead, presumably. You could apply claiming something like social anxiety disorder, which isn't even incorrect.

>>7804901
If you want to break it, then I guess that's the first step. The second would be to figure out why you're so afraid of failure.
Everyone is afraid of failure and everybody fucks up, nobody is perfect.

>>7804910
Why don't you go back to your parents and tell them you want to get your shit together? I don't know your circumstances though so it might be impossible for you.

>>7804921
They hate me and I hate them. Besides, I don't even want to get my shit together. I just want a simple, easy life.

>>7804922
You can find it only if you master the secrets of Tao!

>>7804922
That's unfortunately, but I guess it can't be helped. Regardless, you can't have a simple and easy life by starving.
I'm not familiar with Canada, but do you guys have welfare/government assistance?

Anxiety Disorder/OCD/And possibly autism (I refused any further testing)

>>7804937
We do, but I feel too bad to try and follow the procedures (which I don't even know). I don't have have an address or bank account, so no check. Can't create a bank account because no valid ID and address.

I don't know. Is being completey apathetic about life and the world a disorder?

>>7804947
You could probably go to the government agency responsible for welfare and explain your situation. I doubt it's a rare one.

Where are you living now and posting from, by the way?

>>7804922

If you can clean, handle a gun, cook good food, and fake a British accent, I may let you be my all-purpose Butler when I get rich.w

>>7804951
I can do nothing of those. I'm so useless... I wish somebody rich would take care of me, though.

>>7804901
>Also what would I list as my reason for receiving disability? Fear of fucking up?
Debilitating anxiety and panic disorder.

Anon, what you have is a real and legitimate problem. The very fact that you're disappointed in not working is proof that are willing to work. The problem may be that you are honestly incapable of work because of your brain and chemistry and shit.

It may seem lame and embarrassing, but the fact is that it can be fixed. Doctors can take a look at you and (eventually) figure out exactly what your problem is. Doctor's can then (eventually) _fix_ it, although it might take them a few tries (this is the scary part, but they will eventually fix you).

It's just like having a broken leg and trying to work at a job that needs walking or standing or shit. You can be the most motivated and sincere and awesome smart worker alive, but you gonna fucking fail at your job because your leg broke.

It's just instead of your leg it's your brain. When you get it fixed, suddenly you will actually be able to succeed at shit and get a paycheck and maybe import that Lily Saber figure you want.

Just you need to actually see a doctor and get them working on you.

And take any money you can get from the government. Fuck those guys.

>>7804953
I live outside in the city, sleeping in parks in alleys. I'm posting from the laptop I brought with me, using different networks (usually Starbucks). I'll take a tripcode for easier identification

>>7804950
>I don't know. Is being completey apathetic about life and the world a disorder?
Yeah, it's called major depressive disorder.
No seriously, complete apathy about everything is pretty much the definition of depression disorder.

>>7804947
This might help www.canadabenefits.gc.ca/
If you can get some government money and housing, then at least you'll be able to take it easy in comfort.
This is a good idea too (>>7804953)

>>7804909
Being a leech on the government would only serve to send me further into depression. And in social situations I do fine... not really that anxious or anything.

>>7804919
I'm afraid of it, because I feel completely and utterly worthless every time I mess up. Subhuman, not even the equivalent of my peers. Even if nobody finds out or corrects me on my error, I still feel like complete shit. This will go on for a few days afterwards.

>>7804957
I have absolutely no insurance whatsoever, so any money would come straight out of my parent's pockets. They have enough problems putting food on the table and allowing me to live in their house (which makes me feel even more shitty) so I doubt they could afford to send me to any sort of doctor even if they wanted (which given their track record with doctors, they probably wouldn't want to)

and government money comes from taxpayers. I'd be taking money out of the hands of good hard-working people because of my ineptitude.

>>7804972
Ugh. Just looking at all that bureaucracy makes me want to puke. Doesn't seem to be anything related to housing for people in my situation, either.

>>7804982
Basically you're going to dismiss any solution to your problem because it'll remind you of your situation. If you can't accept the help that society has put in place for people down on their luck to pull you out of the gutter, then you're going to stay there. I know you have problems, we all do, but sometimes you have to do what's hard in life to make it better (or at least fucking tolerable).

>>7804982
>Being a leech on the government would only serve to send me further into depression.
If the government judges that you are capable of work, they'll deny your application and ask you to see a shrink or something, which does have the potential to help you out. I don't know enough about the system to know how much it's going to cost you, if anything, though.

>I'd be taking money out of the hands of good hard-working people because of my ineptitude.
One of the purposes of government is to help take care of people who have trouble providing for themselves.

My biggest problem is that i can't believe in psychologists, Any questions?

I SWEAR I'd do house work if somebody adopted me. I just want to stay far away from the government and society in general. Please...

>>7805003
As as long you don't have any psychological problems that are impairing your quality of life, you should be fine.

>>7804986
It seems to be directed mostly at people who are temporarily down on their luck but otherwise able to take care of themselves, not people without anything at all. Is there something stopping you from going to the local whatever office in person?

>>7805010
I don't even know what office, even less where. The only thing I could think about would be going to a hospital, hoping that they'd take pity on me.

I'd rather be adopted by Anon, though. I don't trust them at all. What if they steal my laptop? Or, worse, look inside? What if they drug me and ruin my brain?

>>7805020
In what city do you live?

I highly doubt that the government will either confiscate your laptop or have you forcibly committed (and if you are not, you can always refuse medication).

>>7805003
That is very common and for a good reason. There have been various times in history (and even today) where some psychologists don't know their shit. A good example is when kids are acting like kids and parents take them to see a shrink. Some psychologists in the past were quick to say "He has Manic Depressive Disorder" now Bipolar, but now some are quick on the ADD or ADHD gun.

What you need to do is just think "does this sound right?"

>>7804982
>And in social situations I do fine... not really that anxious or anything.

Your lying to yourself, bro. You have a serious problem and you need to seriously get help.
Seriously, the doctors do all the work you don't really have to do anything except answer a could questions. Ex:

"Do you smoke or drink?"
"Do you take drugs that aren't prescribed to you?"
"Do you have homo sex with people?"

Aside from shit like this you don't got to do shit. One of my psychs even had a small box of lego blocks in his room.
Shit was cache.

>>7804982
>I have absolutely no insurance whatsoever
>I doubt they could afford to send me to any sort of doctor even if they wanted (which given their track record with doctors, they probably wouldn't want to)

That sucks.

>and government money comes from taxpayers. I'd be taking money out of the hands of good hard-working people because of my ineptitude.

Two things:
1. You aren't actually inept. Your failing because you have a problem you can't fix. Once you start getting this fixed you'll be totally ept that you won't know what the fuck.
2. It's not like sick people are allowed to get help well you are a special loser who doesn't deserve it. You're issue isn't unique and there are other people that have problems just like yours. The government money is there to help people with problems, and you have problems. You are not too good for help, and you are not too good fore government money.

In addition, there's no secret club of tax payers where they all get together and laugh at the "fake" sick people. Believe it or not, those dudes have problems of there own to deal with.

>>7805025
I live in Montreal. The government itself wouldn't confiscate it, but the hospitals surely would if I got in saying I'm suicidal, which would probably be the only way since my health insurance card is expired.

>>7805033
>In addition, there's no secret club of tax payers where they all get together and laugh at the "fake" sick people. Believe it or not, those dudes have problems of there own to deal with.

they are called "Tea Party Activists"

>>7805037
Have you been using any of the city's homeless resources?

>>7805052
I sometimes go to a shelter to wash myself. I hate to be dirty, especially with other people looking.

Major Depression and Anxiety. Taking Wellbutrin and Trazodone. But it isn't doing shit......

>>7805003
>My biggest problem is that i can't believe in psychologists, Any questions?
Clap your hands three time and say, "I do believe in psychologists. I do believe in psychologist."
Repeat that a couple dozen times until you start seeing pixie dust.

Don't actually get any of the pixie dust on you, that shit never comes off and it'll live you sparklin' like some anime bishounen for like a week.

Also, if you don't know if your psych is bullshit or not, then just ask them. It's not hard to tell if their legit, because they'll actually have intelligent answers and shit and will go out of their way to provide evidence of their legitness.

>>7804997
they will judge me capable of work, seeing how as I have worked two jobs in the last two years.

>>7805033
Even if I wanted help, I have absolutely no way to pay for it. So I would never be able to get diagnosed/get any sort of medication

>>7805057
It seems like Quebec offers something called last-resort financial assistance programs.

http://www.mess.gouv.qc.ca/solidarite-sociale/programmes-mesures/assistance-emploi/Index_en.asp

Apparently they want you to fill out a pile of forms and send them in, but in your situation you would probably be better off just walking into your nearest CLE.

http://www.mess.gouv.qc.ca/solidarite-sociale/programmes-mesures/assistance-emploi/comment-faire-dem
ande/index_en.asp

Which there are a lot of. Ask for help filling out a Social Assistance Program application and tell them about that you have neither address nor account.

http://www.mess.gouv.qc.ca/services-en-ligne/centres-locaux-emploi/localisateur/resultats_en.asp?cod
eRegionale=06&idEtabli=R06

I don't know if this is any help at all to you or if you've already seen this all already, but on the off-chance that you haven't, well, here it is.

>>7805082
Apply for Medicaid.

>>7805082
Ask the government for assistance anyway. If they cannot provide you with direct help they will probably direct you to resources that can. Hopefully. Maybe. I don't know how fucked our government is.

If you are American, are you unable to get health insurance even through Medicaid?

>>7805090
>lives with parents
>no previous diagnoses (I'm assuming)
There is no way he is getting on medicaid

>>7805087
Or rather, maybe using the search by service locator would be more useful, if you tick New last-resort financial assistance application.

http://www.mess.gouv.qc.ca/services-en-ligne/centres-locaux-emploi/localisateur/index_en.asp

>>7805100
His parents are also low-income.

>>7805087
I knew about all of this, but feel too weak to do anything about it. I always tell myself "meh, it's not worth it, I'll just kill myself anyway" and never do it...

Thank you, though. You went through the effort of searching all of this for me. That means a lot. Not even my so-called friends did that. I wish I could hug you. You have no idea.

>>7805090
>>7805093
Government wouldn't help me when I put out my FAFSA, there is no way they will help me when it comes to medicaid

>>7805103
my parents are high income, they are just wracked with debt due to my mother's mismanagement of credit cards. They make enough to where the government denied me financial aid for schooling.


Don't get me wrong, there is nothing I would love more than to be a productive member of society... I am just too worthless to do so.

>>7805104
You're... welcome? I don't really know what to say.

Ah, well, poking around the internet is least I can do for somebody who needs help. It would be bad if you died on us or something, you know.

>>7805122
I don't know what else to do, though. I'm my worse enemy. I want to be saved, but don't want to do any effort (yet). It's pathetic. I can't live like this forever. It's too bad.

>>7805113
>don't want to leech
>have no problem applying for fafsa
>have no problem living with parents

nigga what?

>>7805152
Just find out where the nearest one is so that the next time you really feel like killing yourself the door is a little more open to you. Or if you ever find yourself with the urge to go, whether by gathering your will or on a whim, the option will be open to you.

They open in one and a half hours. You could go there today if you liked.

>>7805152
Just find out where the nearest one is so that you have another option open to you, if you ever find yourself with the urge to go, whether by gathering your will or on a whim. Maybe go see the outside of the building for yourself; once you know where it is that door will be open a little more to you.

They open in one and a half hours. You could go there today if you liked.

>>7805165
the idea with the fafsa was that any money I took would be paid back in later years when I was working.

And I have a huge problem with living with my parents. It's a major reason for the killing of myself.

>>7805174
But of course, if not, there'll always be tomorrow. Well, not always. But for a while.

>>7805183
Your parents would probably be significantly more devastated if you killed yourself than if you did just about anything else maybe short of becoming a murderer, assuming they don't hate you or anything.

>>7805187
My stepmom won't give a rat's ass, that's for certain. And as far as my dad is concerned, I have no clue how he is going to react. Given that I am the major disappointment of his life, I doubt he will be terribly torn up.

Also, is there even any sort of medication to fix me?

>>7805243
Medication and psychological treatment might be able to help, but nobody can say for certain.

Remember to sage off-topic threads, etc.

>>7805251
It's a moot point, because I'll never be able to afford it.

And I forget. I'm barely even the equivalent an average /jp/ goer it seems.

you people are just as bad as /cgl/. You need to realize this.

Skimmed thru the thread, but to those that want to kill themselves, dont do it, i need ppl to talk about toehoes.

>>7805847
They can't go to gensokyo without suicide bro. Will you deny them their salvation?

Depression because i have no place after wanting to be an artist my whole life, I also get super anxiety where i get dizzy, my stomach starts to hurt, and my throat closes up, i also use to get weird "feelings" that would bother me during the day, i started taking prozac though and i guess its helping.. Im also afraid of working my whole life because i see my life force and time as the only value in the world, normals dont see it like that and if i ever brought it up, i might come off as ignorant..

>>7805888
>come off as ignorant
>to normals
Why the hell do you care?

Really cool blog thread with /v/-esque posts you guys got here.

>>7805888
>Im also afraid of working my whole life because i see my life force and time as the only value in the world
This is basically my greatest fear. Feels like everyone is out to steal a little bit of my time, whether it's social obligations or earning money to survive, and before I know it, they'll have tricked out of me 60 years of my life and I'll be left with a couple of more years to live as someone way too old to have fun.

Does anyone want to exchange MSNs?

>>7805937
Actually OP is a shitposting fairy from iichan.

>02:06
No janitor in 12 hours?

Not entirely sure. The only one I can recognize is some very mild OCD about checking something when I move around in my house. I know its exact cause and I should fix it, but I haven't bothered because at best it eats me some 2 minutes a day (it's too mild to count, but I end up needlessly doublechecking something when I do a chore. Cause? I used to just check once and one day I thought I checked, yet I didn't, and now I lost the confidence in my checking and I doublecheck, which is a bit stupid as it's nothing important at all). I bet one of these days it's going to annoy me enough that I will just force myself to only check it once (how I kicked some minor OCD habbit I had as a kid).

Other mental disorders? Nothing that comes to mind. I do have a large variety of fetishes, but none of those would be disorders as they are harmless to both me and others (paraphilias are classified as a disorder only when they cause harm).

/jp/ would also joke around about autism (which /jp/ defines as pattern seeker behavior or just having a high IQ), but I don't fit the clinical definition of the term in any way and I can be social and I can empathize with people just fine.

Oh god it's /jp/'s horror story thread.
I don't think i'll ever talk to a shut otaku ever again.

>>7806234
he's some normal faggot who's college student. what do you expect? oh, wait, you thought /jp/ was going to be moderated by a NEET or an actual user? HAHA!

>>7806234
He actually deleted few threads while leaving worst threads like this one.