/jp/ - Otaku Culture

You are tainted. Get out

Atleast she's more real than Alice will ever be

Get out, unvirgin.

How could you manage looking at a naked 3D body and choke back the vomit?

I told you that it's shit.

That's disgusting.
Be sure to hand in your badge on the way out.

Please hand in your /jp/ membership card.

>>6620275
Oh Anon, you card. Stop kidding around like that...

how much did you pay

As punishment you need to divorce your waifu for adultry.

Also sex really is overrated. So is real marriage. Not even going there.

Hand over your badge and firearm, Anonymous.

I know what you mean. I love my waifu much more than the bitches I've come across in meatspace.

Me + Patchy = True rabu

Alice is already a fucking bitch but somehow not even you are worth her you fucking trash.

I got laid too. Sex didn't feel this good, even the tenth time; I prefer my hand.
But, I feel like making that girl happy, so I'll keep on doing it.

I doubt I'll ever have sex, unless 3D women somehow become attractive to me again

>>6620332
she's thinking the same things about you.

3D is disgusting. You either have sex with a slut or end up having a bloody mess.

>>6620349
and that's what love is all about.

>>6620349
I wish. She knows I don't care, but it seems like she's easily pleased.
On a sidenote; sex is really dirty.

If you've had sex, you disgust me.

You disgust me, OP. I don't think you have the right to go back to Alice. That you regret it is irrelevant. The sin is doing it in the first place, and I'm not backwards like some religions doctrines that think a repentant sinner is better than someone who never sinned.

>>6620387
What if you saw a girl that looked like a Touhou?

>>6620407
Impossible

>>6620424
This is like saying "what if you saw an ape that looked like a person"? I don't know how much like a person this ape is supposed to look like, but to everyone it is obviously an ape and nobody would confuse it for a person.

>>6620275
Sorry, real women are more fake than 2D, most of the time.

>>6620438
If by "a person" you mean a human, then they *are* apes.

An ape can look precisely like a human because a human is an ape.

too lewd

Thank you for reinforcing my beliefs.

You can get along with your beta male friends, OP.

Drop your beta lifestyle and live like a real man should-- Omega

How could you!

Kindly get out now and never return.

>>6620957
Why did it take so long for this image to be posted?

>>6620962
Nobody felt the need to post it. We've all seen it. Someone referenced it right away. >>6620276

You will never be pure again.

Yeah, well you need to go through this in order to be sure you picked the right waifu, OP.

It'll be alright.

Enjoy your AIDS.

>>6620397
How dirty was it, Anonymous-who-had-sex?

Why would you have sex with a girl if you don't care for her?

That's why you're supposed to have sex with men.

I hope I never falter and cheat on my love. I could have given up my virginity a few times, but I told myself I shouldn't.

On another note, does anyone else dislike how normal people make fun of people who are virgins?

I TOLD YOU BRO

>>6624102
I just hate how normal people treat meaningless sex as something that is very vital.

What would possess you to stick your penis in a 3D woman's cold, wrinkly, slimy vagina?

>I got laid.
Uh-huh, sure you did.

This is what happens when you give up on your virginity for some casual sex bullshit to conform to the social norms : you end up regretting it. Also, STDs.
I'm glad I finally found love, or so it seems, in any case I'm not touching her until marriage.

>i got laid
>/jp/

Your autistic lies do not fool me, Mr. Anonymous.

Give me some details, man. How dirty was it? What did you two do?

>>6624130
>in any case I'm not touching her until marriage

Is she still underage?

>taking a shower
>my sister walks in on me
>I get a boner
>spaghetti falls out of my pocket
>I step backwards and slip on the spaghetti
>I start puking, shitting, and pissing everywhere while falling
>I fall backwards into the bathtub, and my dick snaps off
>I start ejaculating blood and jizz all over myself
>sister runs out of the room, I go to wash my hands
>look down at my hands, realize they're paws
>I turn into a bear, and run out into the hallway
>run into my sister's room
>run into her with 500 pounds of raw bear muscle
>my 18 inch bear penis becomes erect, the knot thickens, I'm 10 inches wide at the base
>she falls onto the floor
>everybody walks the ps3 has no games

>>6624130
What do you think of people who don't care for marriage?

I'm wondering if /jp/ sees two people who have been in a committed relationship for years give their virginity to each other, but oppose marriage on principle and haven't married as a result? Are they impure sluts or not?

>>6624182
man that's random as hell! XDDDD

>>6620268
How long did you last?

>>6624195
No as long as they care for each other.
We are talking 2D, right? If its 3D the extra dimension makes them unpure

>>6624130
D'aww, how did you meet her?

>>6620268
Congratulations for your first fuck, anon!

Keep the good work up, don't allow those sick bastards fuck with your life. You STILL have a future!

>>6624174
No. Why do you ask ?

>>6624195
I can't speak on a whole board's behalf, but I don't think it's really a problem as long as the two people intend to stay together forever.

>>6624234
On omegle, for real.

>>6624130
9 year olds are great.

>>6624249
...why would you post that picture?

OP, how was it dirty? Describe what happened, please.

>>6624252
You're French, right?

>>6624252
>>google Omegle
>>some thing used to talk to random strangers online with no ID

So basically finding your waifu had the same odds as getting abucted by aliens while all the planets were in perfect alignment. Crazy stuff.

>>6624261
But then they grow up and become not great.

>>6624270
Because I love this kind of stuff.

Be right back, looking for a pure waifu on omegle.

Get laid with someone who you have feelings for, its so much better.

>>6624297
Who are you quoting, ZUN!bar?

>>6624288
Yeah. Were you able to guess from the way I type or something ?

>>6624320
oh dear, he's telling a greentext story

>>6624311
But it's so cruel, and has nothing to do with this conversation...

>>6624322
Because omegle, I gues...

>>6624305
That's why you have to find the magical stuck-in-a-time-loop non-aging kind.

I guess I don't like women really, so I don't care one way or the other about this. I still get depressed a lot, but more because of my general lack of human connection and friendship than anything romantic.

>>6624328
He's being facetious. Ignore him. Stupid elite /jp/ prick.

Is OP ever going to tell us what it was like?

>>6624366
>Is OP ever going to tell us what it was like?
Poor virgin nerd needs a description.

>>6624386
How else am I going to know? There's nothing wrong with being curious. And I want to know how a /jp/er would have sex for the first time.

>>6624411

I feel ya brah. I also like hearing about sexual experiences in detail.

From what I've heard sex is gross and great at the same time. Like you may smell a little poop or nasty pussy smell in the air, but you won't really care because of the lust.

You have dirtied yourself, OP.

I will be over here comforting Alice

>>6624447
Alice doesn't need any comfort from you.

>>6624411
>And I want to know how a /jp/er would have sex for the first time.
plenty of crying before, during and after, and not from the girl like in eroges.

So did she fart OP?

>>6624411

It would be like Yamazaki from NHK.

>>6624481
I cried.

>>6624464

>>6624411

Insanely aroused with cloudy impulsive thoughts, fast finish because I'm a /jp/ resident, horribly feelings of guilt and paranoia.

>mai waifu is the only person in the world I can ever truly say I've loved
>sex with anyone else would make me feel like a bad person
>can't get off to porn of her because I love her too much to want to see her in such... undignified positions
>have to fap to other girls but then feel guilty afterward because it feels like I'm cheating on her
>live with parents so can't get a pillow to hug/hump because if they found out I could never confront them again

I need to relieve my sexual tensions somehow, /jp/ - what do?

I need to relieve my sexual tensions somehow

>>6626139
Yuri. Its how I deal with Marisa, but I guess that is plenty easier to find for her with Alice or Patchy, both good Touhou's.

That feel when a Thai girl wants my dick, but I can't bring myself back to 3d and women.

It's the most awkward feel.

>I got laid
>/jp/

>>6626151
Tried that too. Normally I love yuri, but when it involves my waifu usually all that happens is I get jealous of the girl(s) she's with and that "forever alone" feeling sinks in ;_;

Trying to train myself to lucid dream because... well why the fuck not?... but it would be nice to have some method of fapping with a clear conscience in the meantime.

>>6626139
Imagination plus hand.

Or fap to literature.

>>6626181
Samefag here. Brain blast...

Just plain ecchi. Her alone, nobody else, pics where she looks like she wants it/enjoys it, and as >>6626195 so concisely put it, imagination plus hand.

Thanks /jp/

>>6624182

>>6624182
>spaghetti falls out of my pocket
I'm 16, what is this?

>>6628201

It must have been a Japanese spaghetti. Cooked by a Japanese bird.

kimochi?

>mascara-less

how does it feel to see woman without make up, OP?

>>6624182

>>6629009

>>6624197
He should go to /b/ ROFL XD

>>6630299
Hm, that's insightful.

virgin losers everywhere...

>>6624182
Maybe it's because I don't see these very often since I only visit /jp/ unlike some of you but that actually made me laugh a bit.

>>6630340
The last two lines always make me chuckle a bit.

>>6630340
These parodies have been posted in /jp/ quite some times as well, though. It's kinda stale now.

>>6630334

Eventually almost everyone on /jp/ will get laid. Then there will only be me and maybe one other guy here left.

>>6630388
Everybody besides for one or to people on /jp/ has already been laid.

>>6630388
The winner is the last man standing as they say.

>>6630388
You act like we put a lock on the door that detects virginity.

>>6630388
I will bury you.

>>6630388

Are you talking about me? I hope so.

>>6630412
I don't subscribe to that point of view.

>>6630412
But are you pounding your shoe on the lectern? I think not.

>>6630388
Are you hideous or something.

>>6630388
I think most of us are past that point already. I honestly don't know how I could ever get laid. I'm done with school and I work as a programmer so the chances of me meeting a girl I could speak to are incredibly low.

I assume most people here are in a similar situation, and the NEETs have even less chances than me.

Lots of us are going to stay virgins. And sex with hookers doesn't count.

>>6630337
There's no need to have sex if you don't have the drive for it. There's no reason not to, either, if you have a faithful partner.

I'll take sex, thank you. I've more or less realized its value after noticing the logical consequences of the fact that I virtually have to fap at LEAST once every few days, and after seeing the fruits of my parents' wonderful sexless relationship(well, after they had me; 26 years old). We're warm and happy on the outside, and no fight has ever broken out in front of me, but I know neither of them are truly satisfied/happy with their relationship.

Luckily, I refuse to believe any of you actually believe any of the psuedo-religious nonsense in the above posts and it's like old(er) times and people are only spouting it as jokes/trolling attempts. Unfortunately, I couldn't prevent myself from writing this because I know someone in real life who actually does(Is he not capable of pragmatism? Logic? I don't know; he's even athiest).

>>6630551
Oh, and as an addendum, of course if you have low drive, stamina, or general talent for sex(or if your partner is nasty in any of the various ways they can be), then you're not going to enjoy it. I suppose thinking "sex is not enjoyable" is a good way to rationalize any of those facts in order to continue with the relationship, though, so carry on if you're serious.

Not that I am ever going to be able to have sex. I said I'll take it as an imaginary example if it was possible; in reality, I will be sticking with my waifu, of course(who would be my ideal candidate, but that's not going to happen in my lifetime either).

>>6630470
That's kind of sad. It's a shame I can't say I relate to you.

>>6630579
>low drive
>not going to enjoy sex
I enjoy it just fine. My hand just does the job fine when I do want it. No extra effort wasted on partner pleasing.

Yes, I am that lazy.

I feel like I'm the only one how genuinely doesn't want to have sex or get into a relationship.

>>6630693
Enjoy dying a virgin n00b.

>>6630693
I know that feel.

>>6630693
I don't. When I picture myself having sex I'm a girl, and that's not really something I can do in real life so I simply don't care

Virgin nerds.

>>6630693
>>6630724
We all know that feel.

>>6630764
I can make you into the little girl.

>>6631405
Do it. If I don't wake up tomorrow as a girl aged 10-14 I will be very upset

>>6631413
I was talking about in bed. If you know what I mean.

Eh, you can have sex without love. So Im all good. Fuckbuddies ftw

>>6631430
I like you.

>>6631430
>ftw
I'm fine with the rest of your post, but for this you need to get out.

>>6631430
Just masturbate if you are going to do that.

>>6631418

I would fuck a /jp/er if he was cute enough.

>>6631613
I would fuck a /jp/er if they had less than three dimensions.

So, OP, did you get drunk and fuck a whale?

>>6632070
You no like whales?