/jp/ - Otaku Culture

What the fuck man

Unlike you, I'm not a slob.

Sounds like a South American problem to me.

How disgusting...

Don't you clean up after yourself?

>something is tickling my dick
>put hand in there to scratch it
>suddenly something is tickling hand
>pull hand out of pants
>there is a cockroach on my cock

It's about time for me to go to sleep, it seems.

>>5573351
Funny how you can tell what time it is every night this way.
Goodnight, Anon.

One time I was fapping to Akiko and a spider crawled across my chest.

What the fuck, I just choked on my pepsi

dont have cockroaches where i live

The other day, I was taking a shower when I noticed something tickling my back.
It was a fucking spider.

/jp/ sucks

>playing MW2
>tickle on thigh
>ignore
>tickle again
>reach down
>pull spider out of boxers
>OH SHIT A FUCKING SPIDER OH GOD
>yell and hurl spider across room

STAY AWAY FROM ME YAMAME

Oh my god.

>browsing /jp/
>feel tickle on dick
>ignore it
>feel another tickle on dick
>look down to see spider crawling on my dck
>cast level 8 cock of the infinite
>fuck spider
>realize I'm a bear
>fuck a bear

>>5573438
>alpha as fuck

>>5573438

I-its not like I wanted to tickle you Anon-kun

>>5573451

Words cannot express my hate for you.

>Browsing /jp/ in the dark as always
>Giant mosquito swoops past my face and slams into the monitor
>Duck and cower in fear
>It's actually a small leatherjacket
>Smash it to bits

When I was young, I used to share a room with my older sister. I remember waking up one night because she was screaming like crazy. Turns out a cockroach had climbed into her ear.

Couldn't sleep for months after that. Thanks for making me remember, /jp/.

>>5573451

C'mere, I'm gonna tickle you right back!

>>5573475

>a small leatherjacket

oh god oh god

>>5573451
AIEEEEEEEEEEEE

>wake up with 20 bugbites on your body

don't you just hate it when this happens?

>>5573552

Bumps.

Bumps everywhere.

>>5573552
Never sleeping with the window open
EVER AGAIN.

>>5573583
...You don't have a screen cover on your window?

The worst thing about spiders is the way they move REALLY QUICKLY, then stop. And just stand there, watching you. God, that bothers me so much. And I always want to kill it immediately before it darts away. They move too goddamn quickly. And the way their legs move just makes my skin crawl horribly.

>>5573588
I don't.

>>5573590
I know, the other night right as I was about to go to bed One crawled on the wall at the head of my bed. I went to grab a fly swatter to kill it, but it got away. Worse part is it might have been a black widow, didn't get the best look but what I did points to it. Didn't get much sleep that night.

>>5573605

Oh, the fear. Oh, the terror. Oh, the paranoia.

That happened to me more than once. Then I got a bottle of Ortho Spider Killer. They don't even see it coming.

>something is tickling inside my stomach
>put hand and sctratch my belly a little
>realize that dinner tasted somehow strange this time.
>go upstairs and ask Bea why she's histerically laughing.at me.

So /jp/ is okay with greentext threads now?

>>5573643
Adorable.

>>5573643
>>5573643
Small bombs

>>5573657

>>5573605
Oh I fucking hate when this happens. I usually lay on the floor and look for spiders before I go to sleep, and if I find any I quickly go to the kitchen to get some paper towels to kill it. If they run away I desperately try to find them before going to sleep.

One time when I went to check for spiders as usual there was nothing, but I was SURE there was something. When I went to bed I couldn't get this creepy feeling like there's something crawling on my floor off my back. I tried to brush it off as being too paranoid but the urge to turn on the lights and check wouldn't stop. After ten minutes of fighting with myself I decided to turned on the light and suddenly saw some fucking baby scorpion spider thing crawling near my bed. I almost screamed.

>>5573654
I don't think so. /jp/ is still elitist as ever :)

>>5573696
>:)

GET THE FUCK OUT.

>>5573702
:D

>>5573709
lol u trol mi xd

black widows, not so good.

>>5573712
-UU MAD?

>>5573716
HE MAD

>>5573702
u mad.

y'all mad

I don't see the problem with spiders. They usually keep the flying, more irritating bugs away. Pretty much the lesser of two evils. Plus, they seem to just stay in the corner all day. Not that grossed out as long as they stay there; I really doubt they leave their webs just to climb into my orifices while I sleep.

Did someone say spiders?

>>5573590
>>The worst thing about spiders is the way they move REALLY QUICKLY, then stop. And just stand there, watching you.

Spiders are big babies. They are afraid of you because you're too big for them to eat. When they stop to stare at you they are basically crapping their pants.

Unless you got some of them crazy Australian spiders though, then feel free to scream like a little girl.

spiders are awesome.

>>5573830

Oh yeah, especially when bug spray just makes it angrier.

......Has anyone else burned a spider with a magnifying glass?

>>5573820
>>I really doubt they leave their webs just to climb into my orifices while I sleep.

They don't. Spiders are still scared of you while you're asleep because you toss and turn and your heartbeat vibrates the bed around. Basically they can tell that you're this giant inedible thing and thus they stay far away.

Roaches have no fear though; they're horrible bastards.

Why are you all so grossed out by bugs and spiders? I've been living with them little fellas for years. On occasion a spider comes down from the ceiling to say hi and goes back up.

>>5574114
Humans are very territorial creatures.

>>5573475
>Browsing /jp/ in the dark
>Hear cat being noisy
>Walk over to her, It's dark
>Realize she might've been fighting something
>Turn on light
>Another leather jacket below her
>Point at it
>She eats it

>>5574183
EVERYONE, YOU MUST GET A CAT.

Well, I have like ten spiders in my room, which is handy because flies and mosquito tend to get caught fast in summer, but it still shocks the shit out of me when one of those just, like, walks over my keyboard and is all like 'Haters gonna hate'.

>>5574114
>>5574156

>Humans are very territorial creatures.

This. Also, you do not get in a black man's personal space.

>>5574114

Are you a fucking retard?

Do you not know what evolution is?

I'm pretty any of you that aren't afraid of spiders are developmentally fucked up.

>>5574248
Do you know that evolution is a fucking THEORY, and has not yet been proven by ANYONE? God, you gullible atheist fucks irritate me every time. You say we don't provide enough proof, and then you latch on to the most far-fetched bullshit instead.

>>5574288


Go back to sucking on God's holy cock, you christfaggot.

The intelligent believe in evolution.

>>5574248 implying highly evolved creatures such as humans should be deathly afraid of tiny harmless critters.

>atheist
>evolutionist debate

>>5574296
>The intelligent believe in evolution.
you prolly don't believe in it then
peace

>>5574296
>>5574288
I can't tell who is being sarcastic any more.

>>5574312
never ending ownage

>>5574288

>>5574312

Reported unwrranted personal attack.

Shut your fucking mouth. Who do you think you are?

Do you even know who you're talking to?

Are you guys flipping out over religion in a spider thread?

I believe you know what this means. The word starts with an A.

>>5574324
if evolution is real then why do you exist?

>>5574331
AUTISM

>>5574352
Good job. Want a gold star?

>>5574331
Actually, this is a cockroach thread.

>>5574336

I exist to be a serial killer. It is my destiny.

Why do you exist?

>>5574354
Ok.

>>5574288
>>5574296
Gb2/sci/

>>5574370
No thanks. I've had enough ignorance in this one thread to know that I don't think I could stand the amounts they have over there.

>>5574288
I can't even believe you guys are responding to this fucking trollpost.

But yes if I spot a spider I won't rest until it's death. I've been known to turn my room over at 5 AM if the bastard manages to escape under my bed or something.

>>5574324
yeah, yeah, ok, good boy. go back to your room and play with your toys and leave the computer to grown ups.

i swear, autistic kids these days...

>>5574378

I am 19 years old. I am not a kid. Shut your fucking mouth.

I'll kill you. Don't you ever insult me again.

>>5574379
I spent 10 minutes looking for this image to post in this thread, but I couldn't find it. Thanks for posting it.

>>5574303
Reported.

>>5574393
So you were underaged when /jp/ was made.

My house isn't badly infested with cockroaches, but at night when I go to the bathroom or to the kitchen they're all over the place.

They're not in my room at all, though.

I clean my shit like crazy since I have a really bad fear of bugs.

I also keep my AC on in my room at ALL fucking times.

Honestly my room is like a freezer, I like to think that cockroaches don't like the cold so for that reason they don't come near my room.

I have never ever seen a cockroach or bug in my room.

>>5574415
Yeah, and moot was underaged when 4chan was made. The fuck's your point?

>>5574393
So mad.

itt

>>5574434
My point is, he is too young. Most of us are 22 or older here.

>>5574454
I'm 12. Problem mister?

>>5574393
lol, so much rage. go ahead, try to kill me through the internet. i dare you.

oh, and more insults. autistic retard. faggot. nigger. muslim. cockmongler. cumguzzler.

>>5574470
>cockmongler

It's grinman, idiot.

>>5574483
Cockmongler.

>>5574486
For fuck's sake...

Alright, Word Of Power time. It's Grinman. Always has been, always will be. Not Cockmongler. I'm not saying this towards the trolls who've flooded this thread with Cockmongler shit - they've no hope already. I'm saying this for your benefit - the Anonymous onlooker. You may be new and know nothing about this yet, or you may be old and just plain ignorant. But it's not Cockmongler. It started a few months ago, and it's everywhere. Take it from me. It's Grinman. You don't have to believe me, but I recommend that you do. If you don't, just keep it in the back of your head...the last flickering candle of truth. He's the Grinman. Not Cockmongler. Have some Longcat too (not Cocksucking cat).

>>5574495
It's cockmongler, I saw him on youtube before all that.

>>5574495

Mmmmm, delicious!

>>5573326
I'm going to be honest, we don't have many cockroaches here, I never seen a live one in my life. Ever. We get ants or mice in our houses but no roaches or termites. Probably because our houses are made of fired bricks.

If your house gets infested with mice is there anything you can do with them besides kill them?
Like keep them as pets or sell them?

>>5574520
Become allies with their leader.

wash yourself once in a while you fat cunt

co do prdele dieru zijete v? Atlanta v poriadku?

>>5574495
cool copypasta bro.

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Cockmongler

"A very effective way of trolling 4chan's /b/ is to call the Cockmongler "Grinman" or "Smiling man". They all SHIT their pants at once, and induces many, many lulz."

>>5574517
same here. Gotta say I'm glad I don't have to deal with them.

>>5574616
Since when did anyone give a FUCK about cockmongler?

I only start to care when bats get in my room.
Those fuckers are terrifying

Yeah right, I bet you call 404girl "Yotsuba" as well, don't you trolls?

>>5574670
>Since when did anyone give a FUCK about cockmongler?
when knowing memes was seen as the prerogative of oldfags over newfags.
With things like encyclopedia dramatica, everyone that wants to fit in can use memes now, so "mistaking" a meme is rare and everyone can feel like an oldfag.
It's retarded, but that's how 4chan works,

>>5574679
I had a bunch of bats get into my bedroom once. They were flying around and chirping. I killed five of them that night with a broom. The next day I figured out how they were getting into my room and plugged the hole. I still get freaked out when ever I hear a bat chirp. It pierces my soul.

Thread: Roaches --> Spiders --> Atheist vs Religion --> memes --> bats

I love you /jp/
Never change.

well i don't have cockcroache where i live, when i see one i'm sure to put poison in EVERY SINGLE FUCKING HOLE in the house because i hate them