/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Fact: about 80% of all Touhou characters are fucking adorable.

What? Lies.

Prove it

Fact: 97% of Touhou characters are female

The white devils of touhou

>>506441
LOLWUT

More like 99.9%

I keep on hearing "Tohou is the strongest around". Fucking Amateurs. Not one of those little bitch witches can fuck with my fictional posse. If you guys don't know, I'm Joe Quesada. I am the fucking master of magic. Fuck with me, and your life will be miserable very soon. One day you'll be fucking your beautiful supermodel wife, and the next you'll be jobless and living with your old ass aunt in Queens.

You think I'm scary? Then you don't want to fuck with THANOS. He once threw a bitchfit on the other side of the Universe. The force of said bitchfit was reduced to 2% by the time it hit Earth.

It completely destroyed Japan.

Holy shit right? You thinks he's awesome? You don't knbow about BLACK BOLT. Motherfucker can destroy a continent by whistling the theme song to Lucky Star. By the time he hits "AI MAI-" or however the fucking song goes, your leg is on Mars and your dick is in Ceres. You don't want to fuck with that guy.

And that's nothing. Motherfuckers don't want to touch THE SENTRY. He was one of my better achievements. I was watching DBZ one day while masturbating to Superman comics. That's when I went "Oh shit, what if I put these sexy motherfuckers together and doubled their powers?" The Sentry is so strong, he can kill Gods. Black Bolt destroys planets? This ghastly motherfucker eats suns. You know how you faggots like to put your finger up your asses while masturbating? He just stuffed Antares up his ass while masturbating. And he used the energy to go back in time and come. The Big Bang was just his orgasm. Hot greasy fuck.

And that is why DoDonPachi is the pinnacle of manic shooters.

>>506447
Not enough characters to make this percentage.

Fact: Only 34.6% of touhou girls are gay.

>>506447
Rinnosuke and Wriggle would like to have a word with you.

>>506452
WE SHALL SEE ABOUT THAT.

Are we including PC-98 characters?

>>506450

Fuck You asshole go back to ruining Marvel

Fact: Spring has arrived, bitches.

>>506470
Don't you mean PC-89 characters?

>>506470
Throw as many as you like, if Rinnosuke and Yomou's mentor are the only two canon males in Touhou, you'd need at least 2000 characters to make this percentage.
I'm waiting.

>>506482

Eventually there will probably be that many.

>>506465
>Wriggle

>The full version's official profile declared that she is in fact a her.

YOU ARE SUCH A FA

>However, with lack of male presence in the series she is sometimes converted into a him in certain kinds of fan-fiction

Oh you and your memes.

>>506482
I got 97.87% which rounded up makes it 98%.

I basically included every named character excluding PC-98 that has made an official appearance. This means that I did not take into account Youki because he never made an official appearance anywhere. Therefore only male is Rinnosuke out of 47 characters.

>>506508 excluding PC-98
Doing it wrong

>>506508
Actually, I take that back. I didn't take into account Koakuma or Daiyousei. Or the fact that there's three Prismriver Sisters. I only counted them as one off my list. So time to make adjustments.

And I get 98.04%. Damn, so it's still 98% no matter how you look at it.

Fact: KFC is delicious.

>>506518
PC-98 doesn't exist anymore.

genjii is male.

>>506541
Genji the turtle does, so more evidence of the opposite exists.

How many characters are there anyway? Did anybody actually count?

>>506556
Zun said shit sucks.

>>506441
>>506447
>>506470
>>506508
>>506534
FACT: 99.9% of these people will die virgins.

>>506595
As will you.

Fact: 100% of things in touhou shoot bullets, that most probably, also shoot bullets...Hell, bullets are even shot from nowhere at all, nowhere at all...

>>506595
What about remaining 0.01%?

>>506618
Molested by their fathers.

>>506614
> Hell, bullets are even shot from nowhere at all, nowhere at all...

In some of the PC-98 games this is exactly the case.

>>506635
PCB Extra + Phantasm references this by, well, shooting you with bullets that come from nowhere.

>>506618
2/10. It took me exactly 2.3 seconds to become 97% sure that you were trolling with that maths error there.

>>506651
Not this time L, it turns out I just can't read.

>>506629
I like those odds.

>>506673
Don't forget the 0% sounds like 100%

>>506697
That's the kind of thinking that gets your waifu 404'd.

>>506629

...Mine was my Uncle....

>>506727
;-;

Fact: ZUN likes beer.

Fact: Alice leaks poop.

FACT: Cirno is the strongAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>506862

>>506952
I love these things.

>>506952
moar?

>>506823

>>507381

>>507392

Some Maalox should clear that right up for you.

Wait...they don't have Maalox in Japan. Uhm.

Some Maaloxchu should clear that right up for you.

Fix'd.

NOOO DESU~