/jp/ - Otaku Culture

That's a stink that doesn't wash off.

>>47604898
I can handle the stink just fine, anything for her

>>47604888
Would you let her shove both of her massive futa dicks into your ass? Would you let her penetrate your throat so deep she'd cum in your lungs? Would you carry several dozens of her youkai babies and go through the birthing pains for the rest of your life?
Yes? Good. No? Too bad, it's happening anyway.

>>47604932
Don't care, your mom

I almost feel bad for Yukari. Her fans somehow smell worse than she does.

>>47605028
Oh, I thought you had the worst smell outta all of them

>>47604965
Glad to see you're accepting of your new role as a broodmother.

>>47604888
That's a pretty normal reaction to have, she's one of the many best hags around.

>>47605067
Always nice to see a fellow hag enjoyer

>>47604888
Canologically the STINKIEST touhou

>>47606901
Shion, Rin, and or Chiyari would like a word mister.

>>47604888
hags can't get preggers thoughever

>>47604888
That's a crap hag indeed

>>47608283
fossil milkers

>>47608368
Shit take spotted

>>47608283
>those curves
muuuuh

While she has a great body, I think she would be the best hag to have a drink and just talk to, seems like she could ramble forever and her personality switching every 10 minutes between wanting to be liked and wanting to be feared would keep things interesting

>>47604888
Sure you can fuck her pretty easily but are you prepared for her getting weird and clingy? Constantly popping out of gaps to hug and complain you were gone for an hour? Her being amazingly embarrassing demanding constant affection in public? Needing to reassure her that you do care about her? Having her demand you stay in bed all winter so she has someone to cuddle? People to talk about how you fucked the oldest and most desperate hag in Gensokyo?

>>47610208
>oldest and most desperate
Nope.

>>47610218
Eirin isn't too desperate. She's simply too cool to try dating. She could easily get dozens of men if she tried.

>>47610225
>She could easily get dozens of men if she tried.
Why do you think she sends Reisen to do the deliveries? She'd have more suitors than Kaguya if she showed her face in the Human Village.

>>47604888
Mighty Hag Saggers

>>47604888
not big enuff she need bigger butt and bigger titay so i can fucks with her and make her my mammay and make baybay with my mammay we'll call him dayday!!!! churchhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

>>47609961
Do you think she’ll talk about quantum physics and mechanics first or trains? Or maybe mix it up this time and go somewhere else? I have to wonder how well would she switch back and forth between being friendly yet threatening? Would it be a clear divide and autistically awkward or a smooth transition?
I’d probably take the risk and spend an evening drinking with her. Maybe even get drunk at that and all the consequences that may come with it.

>>47610590
She'll start with physics to sound impressive and the transations between friendly and threatening will be smooth until later in the night when shes getting to into it, that's when the trains come up and randomly blatantly threatening you if you look like you're having too much fun only to get right back into trains

>>47610225
>>47610230
Someone draw a bait and switch yonkoma where all these suitors show up to Eientei only for them to ask out Eirin instead.

>>47610670
I love this picture so much.

>>47610670
That sounds sensible enough. I can even see her tie the physics lesson in by subtly threatening you the listener and student by telling how she can separate your subatomic particles in this way or cause quarks to behave differently to your detriment or whatever. And of course her mastermind larp comes undone as the flow of alcohol and familiarity grows but she needs to maintain her big bad youkak sage image and the fear that comes with it. But maybe, just maybe, this lonely hag woman really does want a friend and all the better one that even shares interests with her.
I wonder if one of her clumsy threats would be to tie anon to train tracks?

>>47610716
I like Yukari and Friends: the image too.

>>47610670
IS THAT A BLACK CAT OH NO IM GOING INSANE SAVE ME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Is dork Yukari is a Yukari funded psy-op or she's really a cute goofball.

>>47611396
This is 100% true, she's here with me and she confirms it

>>47611396
Mastermind Yukari is the Yukari funded psy-op. Dork Yukari is what she wants to cover up.

>>47604888
Where's the pubes, anon?
How am I supposed to masturbate to a hag if there's isn't a thick, poorly maintained, and smelly bush down there?

>>47611396
Gappy is the goofiest goober

>>47611967
Only gay people like body hair, didn't you know that?

>>47615417
But can she Rock! like one?

>>47611967
Cute lesbians

>>47616299
imagine the sex

How much for a gapjob?

>>47616808
Just about three fiddy

>>47611396
Yes it's a psyop, she created it in order to get overconfident men to approach her for easy pickings but she actually kidnaps them and turns them into girls/sissies she impregnates at her leisure.
That's actually the reason she hibernates for half a year, she needs that rest after filling somewhere between 40-50 guys and former guys with a swimming pool's worth of stinky hagsperm.

>>47616957
dude

>>47617088
This motherfucker is never gonna stop, huh?

>>47617233
You mean Yukari? Yeah, so it seems.
fufu

>>47610670
Who drew this, why, and why do I feel strong resonance with it?

>>47628288
What's the occasion?

>>47628318
A man looked in her general direction and didn't immediately vomit.

>>47628318
She impregnated her 10000th boyfriend today.

You have to drink all the milk

I would like a smooch from Yukari

>>47608283

On one hand, Yukari's imperishable night dress is objectively superior in design.
On the other hand, purple cleavage window.

>>47633112
window? It's a fucking MASSIVE fucking airport's hangar door

>>47628318
She received a love letter from a boy today!
She hasn't read it yet, as she needed something to calm her nerves, first.

>>47633141
>Ran Yakumo
I hope she rapes me tonight to cope with the crushing of her maiden heart

>>47633091
flabby!

>>47628318
Looks like New Years to me. It would be so embarrassing being stuck celebrating New Years with some weird old woman. Forced to sit with her on top of a gap that mysteriously seems to have been made a bit too small, so you have to be up against each other to fit on it.

>>47634086
Other parts of her are hard and throbbing.

>>47633156
Oh please PLEASE. I'm not gonna make it bros. I won't one more second of real women trying to fuck me instead of 2hus

Not even her powers could separate my dick from her pussy

>>47636556
She'll just gap your dick inside your own ass.

>>47636317
Well as long as we’re going with totally implausible hypotheticals here, how do you think this millennial maiden would react to the poor man she brought with her leaning a bit on her shoulder? Or maybe even giving her a small side hug?

okina is better

>>47636816
I wonder who’s behind this post?

Extreme hag breeding

Gentle hag lovemaking

>>47640304
>>47640366
This but it's a futa hag breeding you

Mediocre hag fucking.

Holding hands would be nice

>>47642425
Holding boobs? I see.

I wish to be placed under the blanket by an exhausted Ran, huglocked, and forced to inhale the gap fumes so she may get good sleep during her 3 day nap.
I can only imagine the level of her maiden fragrance

>>47642425
Holding hands
Through a gap

>>47642958
I want Ran to feed me while I'm trapped as Yukari's cuddle buddy! I want to grope and touch and put my penis in Yukari while she's too asleep to notice! I want to enjoy my time with queen hag!

>>47643043
For me the temptation becomes so much sweeter if you know Yukari will be cross at you for doing so. Being endlessly teased by her by her body that you're latched onto with the security of an iron band wrapped around you.
I don't think I could stand it for more than a few hours, Itd be hard resisting the urge to make the gappy pregnant while she slept

>>47643043
>>47643087
You'll be used as an onahole by the unconscious youkai. Yukari tends to have really strong wet dreams, you see, she sometimes even sleepwalks because of them. You might end up being costantly used for weeks at a time, cumflated to the breaking point, before being allowed to rest.

>>47646544
Nah, that's just your fate. My gensokyo isn't a troll post by a faggot

>>47646553
Are you saying you wouldn't love Yukari if she had a penis?

The

Sage's
Sagging
Saggers

(He means her wrinkly, low hanging balls)

>>47643031
Sounds lovely

>>47652905
Sometimes she'll let you hold something else through a gap. Something thick and hard.

>>47653385
A train?

>>47643031
Imagine, she could hold your prostate woth both hands...

>>47656279
She could squeeze your prostate from any distance. You could cuddle her and her hand would slide into a gap and next minute you're cumming so hard your mind breaks. Or she could train you that being a good boy and doing her chores means she'll rub your prostate until you squirt everything out. Or if you don't do your chores she'll rub it until you're on the verge of cumming and keep you there until she goes to sleep holding you toght so you can't touch yourself. And she could do this from any distance...

>>47633091
I want to eat this gappy cake so bad

>>47604888

>>47652905
Why is this eldritch horror so cute

>>47664867
All the better to lure folks like us in with her lovely appearance and gobble stud muffins up.

>>47665373
The real reason Yukari is responsible for so many deaths is that she loses her composure the moment a half-decent-looking guy gives her positive attention, and she proceeds to feed them to the more feral youkai to make sure nobody ever finds out.

>>47665390
Classic autistic gappy. This is why she is so ronery.

>>47665390
This is why you need to immediately propose marriage without proposing marriage. Do something like saying, "you're so wonderful and I love the name Yukari. I hope to see you again, I'm looking for someone take out on a nice night"
She will now picture a life together and work overtime in stalking you, hope you like cats and foxes cause you're going to be seeing lots of them as observe your every movement

>>47604888
God I want her to be my mommy so much. I don't care if she uses magic or gap trickery or vores me or anything, I just have to return to her womb and be returned to a fetus. I need to spend the full nine months developing and growing inside her while she nurses me and talks to her baby and shows me off to other people. And I need to be born from her and remember the entire moment I go from the warmth inside her to suckling milk from her heavy jugs. I need to live through her tucking me to bed and changing my diapers and teaching me to eat solid food. I need her to raise me like an affectionate single mom who lets me play with big sisters Ran and Chen, who will help me discover love and teach me valuable interpersonal life skills. And I really wish Yukari spent the whole time raising and grooming me to be the perfect husband for her.

>>47604888
Post more of those swimsuits.

>>47665752
Anon, these are your inside thoughts.

>>47675450
I really like this flustered and nervous sage.

>>47676835
She's nervous because she got an erection and it's very noticeably poking through her dress.

>>47632240
She can give you a titfuck and breastfeed you at the same time lmoaaaa

Breed the gap

>>47675450
i really like this picture

>>47689434
I really like Yukari

>>47693137

>>47693137
I'd like to pet that cute kitty

>>47633091

>>47633091
Would kiss her belly and tell her it's beautiful

>>47633091
would slap her belly and call her fat

>>47700942
Would you kiss her willy and say the same?

>>47700999
She doesn't have one, I won't be responding to you again

>>47664867

>>47701009
Deleted, despite powerful trips... Is this the true power of Yakumo Yukari?

>>47701009
She does. She can grow one whenever she wants, powerful youkai can shapeshift like this.

>>47707224
she doesn't have one, however, she can borrow yours

>>47704808
would worship against my better judgment

>>47709196
Flattering her seems like a smart sort of thing to do though.

>>47709932
Would complimenting her cock work?

>>47675450
Why is her hair tied up in a bundle in some art and free flowing in others?

>>47714794
Her Alphes Art has it tied up, so sometimes people prefer that style.

>>47709932
That'll just encourage her to bug you more
>>47714794
Her early fighting game design has her hair tied up/tucked into her hat. No clue why but I like to imagine they just didn't want to bother animating long hair.

>>47714866
I will have to reciprocate and talk out loud about how great Yukari is even if she’s totally not there.

>>47604888
That's a stink that doesn't wash off.

>>47633133
>>47633141
I want to be forced between her huge hag saggers, my small struggles only netting me a cute yet mocking titter before she presses a giant gloved finger onto my head and sends me deeper in her “Yakumo’s nest”.

>>47724343
She will need more than just a finger to push your cute ass down.
Both her dick and boobs are massive enough to give herself autopaizuri.
You'll be forced on her shaft, slowly sliding down and drowning in her hag saggers as her lava-hot hag sperm rhytmically drowns you from within, all the while she mocks how easy it is to make you scream in madness inducing pleasure.
Try not to let it come out of the other end and stain her dress, though!

Fill the gap

The gap will fill you until you overflow

>>47728890
with love!

>>47732843
Liquid love! Stinky, sticky, thick love!

Stupid smug purple

>>47740969
But which one is the haughty hag herself?

>>47752507
Who else could bottom-right be? Lily White??

total yukari bullying

>>47636816
total okina love

>>47699474
why is she an axolotl

>>47758737
In AoCF, Mamizou has a polymorph spell card, which turns the event into a helpless animal. Reimu becomes a fox, Marisa a crow and so on. Yukari becomes an axolotl. I think it's because it's sort of a half-finished salamander which doesn't metamorphose into a land-dwelling adult, which you could say means it's right on the boundary between a child and adult.

>>47758807
I guess that's what I'm missing out on by only sticking to the main games

>>47758702
Not a fairy, but what she’s doing and who she’s doing it to with gives her a lot of reasons to be exceptionally smug here.

How much money does she have?

>>47762535
A lot

>>47762535
the ancient heg has been squirreling around the outside world for over a millennium
she's probably had Ran working the stock market for as long as it has existed
if you acquire a gap wife, you will get to spend your winters in Fiji on a private island with her when she "hibernates"

>>47763192
You're assuming a lot of competence here.
Yukarin is the kind of girl who lost all her money in the Tulip Mania, the Great Depression, and the Chimacoin bubble.
She only gets by by bumming off Reimu.

>>47763421
I said Ran for a reason
computer fogs will carry the heg's stupidity

>>47763482
Did you forget who programmed her to begin with? Ran only invests in outdated-by-decades industries and aburaage.
Also, make sure to under no circumstances to impregnate the hag (as difficult as that is) or her underlings. You'll only make things worse.

>>47763559
Have you seen the market movements everything food related is making a killing, aburaage and tofu owners are ultra rich

>>47604888
>>47605067
>>47605107
>>47608368
>>47609961
>>47610290
>>47640304
>>47616957
>>47611224
>>47611967
>>47763559
>>47640366
>>47640304
>>47640763
>>47640579
>>47724386
>>47724343
>>47752507
Guys, Rinnosuke has a message for you.

>>47764553
Everyone, look at this loser.
He doesn't even realize that the demand for older women has never been higher.

>>47764553
HAGGGGGGSSSSS
now I wait

>>47764577
And she calls him a loser and drags him through the mud even more. What a viscous old bit

>>47764553
>>47764609
I want to get HAG’d by the purple lady.

>>47764553
saggy hags

>>47764628
She'll do it and act like nothing happened. So cool!

>>47764553
I accept my fate and will call her hag
>captcha: MMMMT
that's the sound I'll make when my face is buried in her saggers

>>47740969

>>47764644
Just another conquest and day for the almighty Yukari. Truly the coolest of Touhous. A coolhu.
No she’s not a silly and lonely dork who still plays with trains shutup.

>>47764749
tfw no actual face.

>>47763192
Yukari was made for charisma breaking

>>47764553
Is she choking him because he wrote the forbidden H word while trying to warn us or because she's forcing him to hold the sign? We may never know...

>>47766083
I figured it was the latter and totally not Yukari is “encouraging” our man to discourage the use of the H word.
Also I love how unhinged clingy Gappy here looks. Poor Rinno is being subjected to a very interesting game of “Guess Who?” with the violet sage.

>>47764749
she's proud of herself because she took her monthly shower without Ran having to tell her to do so

>>47764155
You'd think so, but "Diamond Paws" Ran refuses to sell any because she's utterly convinced that its value is only going to go up further.

>>47769376
Well "Diamond Paws" Ran isn't making any money because she keeps eating all her profits.

>>47769877
Y'know, sometimes I get the feeling that Yukari outsourced most of the work for the shikigami programming elsewhere. Ran.exe never seems to work the way she should...

>>47770079
I really don't think Yukari was the one to program her into sticking her fingers in people's butts...
This could only be the work of Okina.

>>47770087
Might be. We all know the usual quality of Okina's work.
I'd probably entrust things to a bunch of fairies over any of these hags. At least they would make a genuine effort.

Forever 17

>>47770287
1700*

>>47770287
Anon, that's so last year.
Nowadays, all the hags just brazenly walk up to the strapping village lads and ask them if they've ever been with someone with 3000 years of (in)experience.
It's a whole new paradigm.

>>47604888
So would Yuyuko if she could remember what they used to have together

>>47773470
Yukarin and Yuyuko have such a passionate sex energy to them with a hint of bittersweetness to it too, one of the few yuri couples I enjoy a lot.

>>47773417
I would fuck the 3000 years old virgin.

>>47604888

>>47778346
She's not a virgin though, and she's not into guys.

>>47780043
>She's not a virgin
>She's not into guys
Pick one

>>47780091
Ahem >>47773470
You do realize strap-ons exist, right?

>>47780114
According to the Gensokyo chronicle, sex isn't sex unless there's a man present!

>>47780127
Then everyone in Gensokyo is in asexual, loving relationships.

Let these old ladies rest.

>>47780127
Yukari can grow a penis

>>47780173
Most touhous have gocks actually. The hobby of 2hus is to show off their futa dicks to men and remind them how sexually inadequate they are in a world where youkai collectively have twelve inchers. Then tour that man's every hole with their cocks to make sure he understands he's on the bottom of Gensokyo's sexual hierarchy and if he ever wants love he must likely settle for feeling a woman blow bubbles in his ass.