/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Mantitubers
>Real manticore reacts to 'Do Manticores eat people, are they cats, and other manticore myths'
>Despining human aftercare tutorial
>Paw bean massage ASMR
>Cat monster tier list

>>47084804
I thought we all agreed that monster girl threads will now always start with a bug girl?

What's the deadline on that writing contest again?

>>47084824
>Entrants must write a short story, descriptive piece or similar related to the theme 'Welcome to the Jungle' about monster girls
>Submissions must be between 2000 and 8000 words
>Submissions should be complete by themselves.
>The deadline for submissions is July 1st
>Smut is allowed
>NTR, monsterboy, murderhobo, edginess and politics are not allowed
>Submissions don't need to be set in MGE or follow its rules religiously, but they should adhere to the spirit of it
>Two people will be selected as 'winners' by lottery, and I have lined up a comm from yerb for each as a prize
>Writers new and returning encouraged to participate

Still plenty of time to start. Best of luck!

>>47084833
Also people from France are not welcomed.

>>47084833
Okay, thanks.

giving cats opposable thumbs might be a mistake

>>47084833
I'm aiming for the lower limit, so I'll see if I can finish it today, otherwise I'll aim for early next thread.

>>47084905
I'm at 4k words, aiming for around 5.

Fat cows

>find out dragon wife is pregnant
>best day of my life, but it makes me start thinking
>there are a lot of good things about MGC, but if we have a daughter she'll be competing with five other girls for a boy her age
>suggest moving to Order territory, finding an isolated human kingdom and building a house up in the mountains so they'll have more opportunities
>wife isn't convinced, says she'd miss the comforts of civilization and the dating scene in MGC isn't that bad
>tell her we can always build a portal back to MGC, and besides it's for the kids
>six months later she's really gotten into it
>abandons the house to find a cave and turn it into a full-on lair
>two hundred years later she's become known as the Mother of Dragons and Scourge of Humanity
>we have to fight off would-be dragon slayers every few months, but totally worth it

>>47085083
Some dragonfemcel greentext wordsalad tldr who cares nerd 2/10 see me after class
>>47084960
Cute chubby cowe would snuggle with 10/10

>>47084884
It's your job to educate your daughters to be good kots

>>47085275
is there such a thing?

Chuff, you say?

I will raise bad kots
I will give them phone and YouTube kids at age 4

>>47085346
Jaguars like water too, so there needs to be art of Ocelomeh swimming or bathing.

>>47084833
I’ll aim for the bare minimum since I’m not sure I even can anymore.

Get glomped, shorty.

>>47084960
As they should be.

Reminder that stuttering out phrases like "G-Get back!" or "Stay away from me!" or "No! P-Please no!" to the massive Hellhound slowly stepping towards your tinier, scared form only emboldens her.

>>47085428
cute blind lady

Subaru getting an eyeful of showering Chun-li

>>47085353
Anon no, their English skills will deteriorate beyond comprehension and their ability to read will be reduced to wurm grade levels.

>huff Kesaran Pasaran spores

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6WIfK-_WbTM

>>47084833
I'm trying! Work demands much from me

>>47084833
Do bugs like headpats? That seems like more of a beastwoman thing to me.
Can someone explain the entire psychology of a bug's life?

>>47085656
I assume the headpat association comes from the antennae. That's where their most important sensory apparati are.

>>47085656
Frankly I find the idea of a bug that thinks offensive.

>>47085685
Angel! Angel!

>>47085656
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5w0p7vM0xY

>>47085762
his eyes are haunted.

>>47085691
she thinkin' bout you

>>47085791
I think I've seen this movie before.
Looks like I have to duke it out with the scorpion queen while mummies chase me.

>>47085781
You'd think it would remove itself from the premises if it didn't want to be touched, but it doesn't.

>>47085814
They're intelligent enough to sense whether you're trying to hurt them or not based on your own movements.

Imagine being the zookeeper for a mamono zoo. Obviously, any of the mamono being held in “captivity” let themselves be “captured” because of the ease of access to husbands-to-be visiting the zoo.

>>47085685
>Any drink of your choice
I pick Shog Cola. The only cola made of healthy sugar free Shoggoth based sweetener. Every bottle comes with a free maid/wife! (Limit one bottle per customer. Ask meido for free refills!)

Real dead hours.

>>47086015
Its all fun and games till you get boarded by the Serpentian Systems Allience and your buddy gets dragged by a tail into the vents.

>>47086110
Don't look at me like that.

>>47086006
Was sort of into it until i noticed the handfeet

>>47086103
Ms Arch Lich isn't wearing anything underneath today

>>47086108
I had the misfortune of working for Her Illumanancy's Slithering Service Soldiers (HISS) and it was one of my worst deployments. They don't have an onboard chef, just a room with a bunch of lower lifeforms that they eat.

>see hebi shopping for meats in the grocery store
>entire cart is full of meat
>watch her pick up another packet of meat
>walk up to hebi
>compliment her beautiful hands
>quickly walk away when I realize how autistic I probably just sounded

>>47086155
>He doesn't want to get a combination handjob/footjob

>>47086156
More like "all the Liches" and "every day"

>>47086240
Except that one time an Anon made her wear spats

>>47086336
>those outfits
Goddesses also count as monstergirls right

>>47085762
where's her !

>>47084960
Touch the cow. Do it now.

>>47085346
I'm still undecided on whether or not the taco cat's particular brand of feline dishonesty would be tolerable or not.

>>47086116
You're only going to make her smugger talking like that.

>>47086359
Sure but those digital monster girls are nearly perfect in the first place.

If a big femdom monster like an Ushi-Oni or a Hellhound or a High Orc comes up to me trying to think she will intimidate me I will stand firm and tell her that I am NOT afraid of her (I secretly really am on the inside)

>>47085685
My parents will be glad when they hear I married an angel, then terrified when they see her dressed like that and realize she's of the fallen variety.

>>47086359
Holy fuck I’m retarded it took me a week to realize who they were dressed until you said that.

>>47086490
It's okay, they're more scared of you than you are of them.

>Manticores work hard for their reputation
>Earn it, people fear them
>Revel in its effects the first few times they're with their husbands
>Hellhounds take ONE bad yearbook picture
>People fear them or look at them as some personal challenge to their masculinity
>They just want a cute boy to top and be topped by
I can imagine some whining to dark priests or something for help salvaging their reputation.

>>47086110
>Jeez anon, I can't believe you came from just 3 minutes of eye contact and handholding
How shameful, and she told all her friends too.

>>47086632
Word of a hand slut always spreads quickly amongst monsters. The man will probably get BEANED soon, then hell be ruined for (additional) marriage.

mud pussy could get you anywhere anytime

>>47084804
I will join the gape team with the foreign student, we will make it to the pro leagues and we will be rich someday!

>>47086729
Do you think all the various realms and kingdoms face off against each other in some sort of olympics event.

>>47086490
>tell ushi-oni you're not afraid of her
>she thinks she's finally met someone who can look past her monstrous appearance
Do you go on a date with the 5-ton spider woman, or do you break her heart by admitting that she actually terrifies you?

>>47086571
>Gnoll-chan smiles exactly once while being nearly 223 cm tall
>Everybody calls her a fearsome monster who devours men bone and all
>She just wants an Anon to cuddle and dote on with the rest of her clan

>>47086751
Of course, there's also sex Olympics events and some pure recreational like the world cup.
Of course they are all sponsored by the Danuki conglomerate.

>>47086729
If I joined a gape team I would do it with my Troll childhood friend and let her Christmas cake power overwhelm the event
I'm tired of foreigners getting the best spots and all the contracts in the league when we have so much local potential

>>47086752
>Admit you're afraid of her because of the stereotypes surrounding ushi-onis, but you want to get to know her as a person and maybe fall in love.
Bittersweet, perhaps?

>this shit again
/trash/spammers ban evading for the tenth time in the last 48 hours

>>47086874
I would join with my auntster, she has been playing sports with me since I was in kindergarden so we have a good synergy and experience, I would love to show what we can do on TV, specially worldwide if we make go pro.

>>47086729
Why choose a foreign girl when your Cheshire classmate that sits next to you has been pestering you the whole time to join the team with her?

>>47086839
We really screwed up on not adding more sex sports. I just can't think of many that make good spectator sports. Maybe a cage match where you toss 50 monster girls into a pit doing that silly sex based fighting style I remember getting mentioned once somewhere.

>>47086978
You don't understand bro. You are literally Hitler if you don't want to show the world your wives gaping anus.

Totally organic posting and not a raid btw

>>47087034
>50 girls in the cage with all sort of sexual weapons
>flinging dildos, anal beads and all sort of bodily fluids during the match onto the spectators
>at the end all monsters exhausted after cumming so much while there's one left standing
>the referee enters the cage and claims her the victor
I would love to see that

>>47087034
The "Sex in a Cell" event is great but I'm more of a fan of "Oiled Rumble"

But what if... adventure?

>>47087177
What if adventure but sexy?

The Gandharva swooned as the anon she wooed drew nearer, her voluptuous form jiggling with a hypnotic rhythm to further his entrapment. Her demonic and false tongue said, "Come closer o' Human man. My devouring of your very life essence is nigh, and you shall be rewarded with eternity in marriage to my form. Eternity that cannot be escaped, but at least you will be happy!"

Just then, as anon was about to submit to the demoness and seal his fate, he heard an ordinary voice from behind call out to him, saying to 'wait' in his tracks, momentarily destroying the hypnosis under his eyes had been glass. So he turned and saw what he saw. The meek and disciplined figure of none other than the Buddha himself sitting under his bodhi tree.

The Buddha called out, saying "This is not the path. The good intention drives away the negative, but the bad intention only brings you closer to the unwholesome roots and their three poisons."

The anon, galvanized to his unwholesomeness by the venom of the lecherous Gandharva snorts, and does his teeth grit. In impotent anger, he accuses the Buddha, who is not tangible to his woes, of accountability; "But I am about to get everything I wish for, Buddha! I will be eternally embraced by the colossal features, shrouded in pillow! My brain, this body grown to be touched, will be marred with pleasure! Pleasure, that which cannot be grasped but received, received endlessly! Why should I turn down this offer now at the cusp of acquisition? Do my fantasies and happiness not matter?"

The Gandharva, the lustful culprit of anon's corruption cackled, thinking she had won. But the Buddha's countenance neither twitched nor changed to reflect any sort of arrogant gainstand. He, as the world, was utterly unfazed, and the Gandharva now became cold upon seeing this.

"You are inseparable from the world, anon, and from me, and from any other. You yourself have admitted this." The Buddha enlightened him, continuing by saying "It is truly your fault of any pain or negatives, because you fail to see the nature of reality. You think you will achieve salvation by washing your pain away with the help of others, and of things such as pleasure that are real as your body is. Your salvation is only within your own hands. You choose whether or not to draw closer or away the three poisons or nirvana."

And the Buddha smiled. And anon was truly shaken. In that instant, the Gandharva cried out her demonic cry of petulance and rage, for she had been defeated, as all Mamono had, by Buddha. The Mamono were powerful, and mana was powerful, but understanding was beyond the scopes of power, the scopes of anything. It was not something the Mamono could hope to tear down, and so the Gandharva had lost, and now Anon drifted away from her clutches. Not the false Demon Lord, nor the Fallen God, nor Eros, nor any other of these evil devas could have helped her to reverse this situation as well, for they were everything but Buddha was nothing.

"I was wrong" Anon admitted. And so he meditated upon this and achieved enlightenment, coming to understand the universe. He was freed from the cycle of Samsara and the unwholesome Gandharva that tried to trap him within it.

The Mamono could overcome many things, but not the wise teachings of the Buddha.

>>47087343
Not reading all this shit nigga

>>47087343
I have no idea about foreign religions

>>47087343
based buddha

>>47087343

>>47087343
Nice to see a story with a good moral for once.

>>47087034
This but with a cage filled with shortstacks

>>47087376
True, true.

>>47087343
Buddha wouldn't be against marrying monsters though. If anything, all she has to do is follow you into achieving nirvana together.

>>47084804
meow lmao

>>47087464
Why are there ring lights in my bedroom?

Hebi theme song
https://youtu.be/y2XArpEcygc?si=yeNPmtzhTkjHgtdh

What do you call a 25 years old mino? A beefcake.

>>47087464
I like dark skinned monsters that have a very shiny skin

Cait sith bringing a dead mouse home?
It's more common than you think.

what happens if you spook the hoss?

>>47087551
You like brown catgirls huh?

>>47087551
We know, that's why foreigner girls with dark tones and shiny skin always get the contracts for the pro teams and all the sport scholarship

>>47087578
She runs away. It's what horses do, they're flight animals.

>>47087620
Chocolate sells

>>47087632
>Flight animals
>Air Hosstess

>>47087580
I have my preferences for monstergirls, but I would probably take any one that got to me first. They'd all make good wives.

>>47087620
>all leagues dominated by Hellhounds
This is why I prefer amateur tournaments and local school leagues, there's variety at least

Enough about monster girls, lets post about completely normal human girls who are totally not monster girls in disguise

>they're still going
Reminder that these vermin have multiple boards like /d/ and /trash/ to post disgusting shit in, and the only reason to do it here where it's specifically not welcome is to raid us.

>>47087733
What is this

>>47087759
Some guy on Deviantart made a few mockup screenshots for a nonexistant visual novel with MGE girls. Look at the filename.

>>47087752
I recently got a totally human girlfriend (the local priest even checked)! She's nice, caring, and gorgeous, but what I like most about her is her hair. It's so long and silky I can't keep my hands out of it, but she doesn't seem to mind. Recently, she's started jerking me off with her hair, actually. I thought it would feel gross or irritating, but I can't get enough of it now, LOL. Good thing she doesn't mind the mess. It's the kind of thing so kinky not even a monster would come up with it. I love human women!

>>47087741
Monster girls schools where they all clamor to ask the only boy in class to help them.

>>47087834
Being the only boy in a monstergirl school would be terrible.

>>47087817
Actually, this makes me wonder: for those girls that can truly pass as human without effort, would they bother to tell their husbands that they aren't human if not prompted? I can almost see some idiot making two daughters into a selkie, wondering aloud if the next one will be a boy and having his wife do the dramatic newspaper lowering thing.

>>47087860
>replying to the /trash/tards reposting their shitty ERP for the hundredth time

>>47087883
???

>>47087893
Look up the post chain, they're circlejerking the same disgusting monster """""sports""""" shit from months ago again. They've been evading bans and cycling through different shitposts for the last three days or something.

>>47087834
It's even worse when you are the only male teacher in an elementary monster school

>>47088013
Just work exclusively as a private tutor.

>>47088032
Then you just get the rich ones and the ones that save up their allowance to hire you out for one on one time.

So gape shit died off for a couple of weeks and now they're trying to revive it?
Like why? its disgusting seeing gaping asshole

>>47088049
Monster buttholes are pristine and beautiful

>>47088049
There are extreme amount of untamed potential in monster butts, that's why they practice with sports until they find a partner that will show the world what they are capable of doing and compete with the best against the best, claiming superiority over all other monsters with their butthole power.

>>47088187
Brown, white, and gold work so well together. Just sprinkle in a little blue or purple and you've attained peak aesthetics.

>>47088049
They are monster girls, don't mix it with disgusting 3D garbage
It's like in doujinshi, hell I bet the even use their gaping buttholes as flower vases for the flower arrangement club like certain doujinshi and it's fine

>>47088196
i like what eros got going on

Beware tanned vampires, the most dangerous of their kind. You never know when one might strike!

>>47087376
Powerful goat wisdom, why are they so wise?

>>47088032
>Just work as a private tutor
>Danuki bragging to class you did XXX and OOO during her private tutoring session
>Bring out the same brush you used on her tail, telling the Kitsune class president to calm down since all you did was groom the “filthy no-good-lying raccoon dog” ( her words not yours)‘ tail
>Class devolves into all of the beast girls wanting to be brushed too

>>47088210

>>47088211
I bet it's spray tan, easy to counter with a waterspray bottle. (with holy water in case it's actually real)

>>47088049
Are you saying you never imagined rimming or getting rimmed by a monster girl?

If you are going to be doing stuff to it best believe you are gonna have to open your eyes.

>>47088049
Personally anal sex and doing some other unspeakable things to monster butts is one of my biggest fetishes, and doing for sport sounds amazing

>
Everyone already rejected your disgusting garbage months ago, just go back to /trash/.

Cu sith, cait sith, and dormouse starring in
>The odd harem

Is it bad luck or good luck to fuck an albatross harpy while sailing?

>>47088696
Depends if she was part of the crew or just flying by

>>47088696
I don't know. Maybe the Krakens won't pay attention to you then.

>>47088696
Just make sure you never go to a lighthouse with an old Nereid. She'll keep annoying you with questions like "Why'd you spill your beans", and "You're fond of me cooking, ain't ye? I SEEN IT!" If you do have the misfortune of landing on her island, don't go up into the lighthouse, you will be severely punished with a foursome between her, a Sea Bishop, and the aforementioned albatross harpy.

>>47088556
https://files.catbox.moe/bentxt.png

I'm gonna call every sea mamono I see Moby Dick from now on.

I'm going to call every cow mamano I meet the cow

>>47088759

>>47088806
Thanks Anubis

If I see two Monster friends hanging out with each other I'm gonna shout "Carpet munchers!" from afar and then book it.

>>47088853
>they chase and pin you down
>flip their skirts to show you their cleanly vaxed cunts
>refuse to elaborate
>leave

>>47088853
>I say, what did that handsome chap over there just shout?
>I'm not sure. Something about rugs and eating them.
>Oh. Hmm... do you have any idea what that means?
>Not in the foggiest.
>Shall we rape him anyway?
>I think that's a capital idea
>Smashing
>Quite
>Indubitably

If you marry an elf you're either going to turn into an eternal shota or you're going to turn into Gandalf. There is no middle ground.

fishe

>>47088877
Balrogs turn you into Gandalf, Elves just turn you into a mayfly, Darth Vader, or Himmel the Hero.

>>47088880
To sleep with the fishes tonight will take a new meaning when the portals open.

>>47088913
>Sleep with the fishes? Yeah I do that every night. The cement shoes your boss gave me are really nice when I'm gardening or something and don't want to float away, would you say thanks for me?

Do you have a vision of what your waifu/waifus would look like? Or would you just sorry of go along with the generic? Of you do have an idea on how they look like or behave, please share!

>>47088696
I'm not sure you have much of a choice in the matter - vis a vis albatross fucking - so you might as well not worry about it.

>>47089033
She looks like the profile girl, except much younger and pear shaped.

>>47089033
If I like a monster I tend to default to a look and personality pretty close to the profile. I went off canon with my ideal demon, so her image is a bit more developed. More average figure but still perky as hell, yellow eyes, simpler lay-about-the-house clothes that scratch my casual lewd fetish, probably a tramp stamp, and a migrating mole I never do pin down. Not too different from Asmodeus, really.

>The boss when you fight her
>The boss when you unlock her as a playable character

You accidnetally brushed agaisnt her tail
You're married now. Ancient fox tradition, please understand.

>>47089202
I think I just became a fox person now anyway.

>>47089202
Why are foxes so backwards? They should learn to respect the wishes of single men.

>>47089202
fuck, not another one. this is the 3rd one this month!

>>47089033
I don't really do self-insert things or oc making.

>>47089198
>eat out goth elf gf
>still there
>eat goyslop
>it's gone
Stop making these, they're not funny or witty or anything.

>>47089226
As long as you don't suddenly start thinking they are real.

>>47089202
I hope she's ready for transforming into a loli with a pear bodytype because that's the sexiest female form I can think of.

If I'm at the beach and I happened to merely glance a Monster's nice ass clad in a tight bikini for a paltry second or two this does NOT mean I want to marry her or that she has the right to rape me. But this Anubis trying to force her way through the door of the condo I'm staying at for my vacation is REALLY pushy and doesn't seem to understand this!

>>47089237
In this case I may take the sandwich and try my luck with the next girl.

>>47089221
Maybe dont be so foxable and you wont get foxed.
Ever think of that?

>>47089225
Building yourself a fox harem huh?

>>47089252
im not building shit. these animals just force themselves into my life and refuse to leave.

>>47089033
of course i have and already made them into cards for sillytavern chatbots

>>47089251
Foxes say this to every man they encounter...

>>47089266
I miss when we had access to really good AI girls for a while.

>>47089261
>suddenly find yourself with three foxwives taking care of you and the house
That doesn't sound so bad.

>>47089268
because all men are dumb and foxable?

>>47089283
Can confirm.

cows are literaly evil

>>47089312
>t. breastless goat

>>47089312
Cows are literally veal

Cows are literally made for me.

>>47089283
mofmof

>getting marked with hebi girl stink

>>47087741
Anon please give them a chance, I bet you will have fun and will become an athlete too

>>47089514
I want to trace her freckles

Imagine easily carrying a loli Candlegeist around as a light source while going on a night stroll through your gothic mansion and the grounds

What if the fox unsealed you instead

>>47089551
Small ones are perfect for piggyback rides.

>>47089571
Are we not all sealed within this monsterless world?

>>47089571
Does that mean she's gonna kill me?

>>47089497
Fake news snakes don't stink.

>>47089551
I'm going to go through an anime training arc so I can bridal carry a candlehag.

>>47089571
>your bloodline, hand it over

>>47089572
I think princess carry is superior, especially in this scenario where you would be a gentleman with a big oldschool manor.

Young Candlegeists should be carried in a candle-holder whilst you wear blue striped pajamas and a long night cap.

Is lizard a slur against dragons?

>>47089598
>Our world is just the Australia of MGE
>Human kingdoms of old sealed the worst men and women here and knowledge of us was mostly lost to time and legend
>One day some Lim stumbles across it and decides to awaken the ancient evil

>>47089691
Everything suddenly makes perfect sense. But also what if we're all of the irredeemables?

>>47089689
Yes, you dumb, knuckle-dragging, mere ape. Now you must marry a dragon to show you're sorry for even typing the L word.

>>47089730
Then it's amusing to think of KC as the angry baphomet warden that goes on rants about NTRman(us).

>>47089689
It's not like they'd do anything about it if it was anyway

>>47089748
Somehow that makes it all the more funny to think of an undercover Baphomet about ready to burst out in rage because of the mass of NTR doujins compared to lolicon.

>>47089680
That's a cute mental image, I wonder what originally inspired that outfit in all the cartoons anyway.

>>47089731
>Racist demon

>>47089861
>k, stay dead
>X

>>47084820
>make a fortune recording "Spine-ing your boyfriend" ASMR videos for lonely manticores
>dozens of comments on every video about how they wish they could do this to a real guy
>ordering a drink at a cafe one day
>manticore barista's head snaps up fast enough to give you whiplash when you give her your order
>she hands you your cup
>has your username instead of the one you gave her

>>47089952
>See username on cup and freeze
>How did she recognise you?!
>"E-excuse me, this must be some mistake." you offer nervously. "I ordered a coffee under the name Anon - this clearly isn't mine."
>"Huh? I remember clearly what you ordered, Mantilover99. Clear as day."
>"That isn't my name. I-I don't know who this Mantilover99 is but-"
>"Shh! Not so loud! What, do you want to be thrown out or something by my manager? Whisper. Quietly."
>An odd thing to say. You didn't think you were talking that loud to her, and since when was their a rule about talking too loud in the first place?
>In a forced, pointed whisper you reply, "Sorry. I do not know who mantilover is but my name is Anon."
>Why is she biting her lip?
>Why does she look like christmas has come early?
>Why is she-
>Oh shit
>That whisper you used is the same whisper you use for your ASMR videos
>She flashes a predatory grin
>"Well well well. I guess i was mistaken after all, Anon." she drawls your name maliciously, "This is your coffee then, Anon. Because that's your name right, Anon? I guess I got you confused with someone Mantilover99, Anon. Someone who makes videos about manticores online, Anon.Did a really interesting video about a manticore following a guy home recently, Anon. Isn't that strange, right, Anon?"
>"S-strange? W-why is it strange?"
>"Because you ordered this coffee to go... and my shift ends in 5 minutes ~"

I will tell the foul Dragon that I slew decades ago, now arisen again as a Dragon Zombie, that she should have stayed dead and that I WILL kill her again with my lance, just like I have done before!

>>47090042
Dawww...
I'm such a sucker for batcats.
Good hunting, Miss Kitty!

>>47090046
Minutes before instalossing

>>47089861
I want to fuck a Wight and get clawed on the back by both sets of hands

I spoke for about five minutes in Dragonia about why the zombie variants are cuter

>>47090160
cuter than dragon slimes? bet not

If Dragons like coming to our human nations and being racist to us so much, then I'm going to go to Dragonia and be racist to them. Let's see how they like a taste of their own medicine.

>>47090216
>Man sparks dragonian invasion of human nation by calling the first dragon he saw a smelly lizard, not knowing it was Deonora in disguise.

>>47090216
>tfw Anon is arrested for making a dragon cry.
>He escapes by making the dragon cop cry.
>Eventually they send out Officer Wurm to deal with him.
>Makes her cry, too.
>But seeing the pure beauty and love of a Wurm crying, Anon's heart grows 3 sizes.
>Resolves to reform himself.
>Marries a nice wyvern and everything.
>Eventually.

>>47089689
Ethnic slurs that are just a word for another ethnic group are so confusing.

>>47084804
Taco taco cat

Humanity must pay reparations to the Ocelomeh people's indigenous tribes for decades of colonialism and oppression at the hands of oversees colonial empires under the Order.

>>47090362
How about husbands and several pallets of baja blast.

>Meanwhile on 4mon…

>>47090216
I will make a dragon join a sports team with me and make her succumb to my technique
https://files.catbox.moe/6hfr8v.jpg

Humanity must pay blood reparations to the Vampiric people for decades of mocking stereotypes like count chocula and the count from seasame street

>>47090399
The Count is one of the most faithful iterations of vampire folklore

>>47090399
>mocking stereotypes like count chocula and the count from seasame street
those dorks should be honored being compared to such illustrious figures
guess we should just call them ugly mosquitoes instead

>>47090399
Vampires are all c(o)unts.

Humanity must pay our kind lots of tax money and rent fees or suffer the consequences of eviction which means that we get to keep them like pets and trap them with our big bushy striped tails, oy vey.

>>47090437
I will pay by offering to sniff her breath free of charge!

>>47090437
Miss Rata, are you trying to seduce me?

>>47090399
How about we repay them in dhampirs?

>>47090399
How is count chocola a stereotype? Are you telling me there are chocolate-flavored vampires?

>>47090399
Maybe if vampires weren't so fucking boring they'd be worth respecting.

>>47090650
Zombies are the better undead, Vampires are so fucking boring

>>47090650
boring her teeth into your neck, maybe

>>47089689
Yes and they probably scream how they’re a filthy slutty lizard in bed

>>47090658
I always liked in that picture how that bra is connected to nothing by the sides meaning that those titties are hold by their natural firmness instead of getting hold by that bra.
The bra is there just to cover her nipples.

>>47090663
You know what. Fuck you. I'm fucking tired of this retarded ass notion that vampires drink shit through their teeth like some kind of girlfailure bullshit ass Hot Topic wearing, wouldn't catch me staring, gonna have my sun lamp blaring ass simp. Either scrape and lick like a vampire bat or fuck off you greedy whore.

I've seen heaven and it's wet and gooey

>>47090750
Are you seriously trying to out tsundere a VAMPIRE?

Lizardmen and Salamanders be like
>I will only marry the mightiest of warriors!
>That guy called my hair cute...
>He laughed with me when I made a joke about his beer gut
>I must fuck him unconscious
You may think that you are safe from a monster's standards, but she is still a monster lusting for humans.

Do hellhound moms even care if someone walks up and takes her jk daughter? Would she care if she was younger?

>>47090785
She can take a hike with her Mina Harker from Wish looking fashion sense, she's got a dried up and withered ovaries and no mense, even Blade's Pearl saw more action and they looked like a fucking Snorlax, bitch needs a Brazilian wax. Her fangs are fake, I'd get rid of her with a Cupid lead arrow stake, might as well just turn into a flying rat because I'm about to break out the wiffle ball bat.

>>47090658
I would have a zombie as a gaping partner and in the future she would be a wight in the pro scene

>>47090809
Go ahead, take her, less headache for mom.

Monsters in stirrup stockings

Alright, I've got a wild new hypothetical. What if succubus (succ) and she loved you (<3). What now, western man?

>>47090938
genuflect

>>47090938
Deflect her onto nearest man to me.

>>47090938
Reflect with a No U

>>47090938
Ah fuck how could you even think of such a diabolic scenario? A cute desperate lonely succ who just wants hugs and kisses during mating press? Wow that's so evil maaaan

>>47090938
Marry her and have a big family with her

>>47090809
Take one of her daughters? Anon, it's the daughter that brings some hapless man to show to her mom.

>>47090515
They're not common

>>47090938
Wonder where I went wrong in my life I guess.

Ratas are for _______.

>>47090977
I can smell the lust in that image.

>>47091061
stealing from the park

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56653354

An Ocelomeh Fever! It’s been a while since I last posted a story, so here’s my entry for the writing contest.
It’s about an explorer discovering the New World and making first contact with a tribe of ocelomehs.

>>47091061
mating press

>>47091061
Anal sex

>>47091066
>>47091070
>>47091105
Criminals and pervs!

>>47091061
Toilet paper.

>>47091110
How do you use a rata as toilet paper?

>>47091124
https://youtu.be/fHR6a3SO35s

>>47090938
My only weakness, I'll have no choice but to submit to this succ

>>47091067
Fuck yes, I love Ocelomeh.

>>47091107
https://files.catbox.moe/c8a4e5.png
They asked for it

The Lilim came up to me today and she said "H-Hi, anon! Nice s-seeing you today! I just want you to know, I-I... I like you..."
So I looked her dead in the eye and I was blunt. "You mean nothing to me, Lilim". She ran off crying after that.

>>47091214
>anal
eugh

>>47091229
>The whispers of a dream escape the mindbroken manslut's lips
>Totally unaware of the world around him, lying in a puddle of mixed fluids
>S-smelly lilims would never d-defeat me
He couldn't beat the lim, nope couldn't win against the lim

>>47091315
How could those succubi be so cruel as to exploit their asses (my weakness) to take advantage of me?

Goodnight Anons, take care and don't burn down the thread.
Instead, remember that, when dealing with Selkies, running onto land doesn't so much end the chase as it does extend it.

Is it koturday yet?

>>47091350
Just a few more minutes.

>>47091315
What do succubi tails feel like?

>>47091350
In time.....

>>47090938
i would cry a lot and hug her a lot and make her promise not to leave, i think

>>47091350
Still counts as Friday night to spend with your auntster

>>47091447
Want danuki auntster to get me drunk as a teen for the first time with the intent of getting me to have sex with her under the influence but she overestimates how much i can handle and i fall asleep on her chest before she's through her fourth glass of wine

THEY HAVE SNIPERS IN THE TREES, GET DOWN

>>47091487
This but instead of trying to get me drunk she just asks me for help to carry some laundry from the mattresses in the basement, and one thing leads to another

>>47091528
i want ms cupid to lay me out with the eros railgun

>>47091543
getting blasted by a Demon Silver projectile at 2,500 km/s and having both of your nuts immediately explode trying to generate that much semen, sending you on an emergency doctor's visit where you, upon restoration, immediately marry and rape the unicorn reconstructive surgeon who pieced together your shattered testes.
All according to keikaku

>>47091347
Imagine being married to both an apophis and a pharaoh

>>47091447
Imagine smelling the wine on her breath!

>>47091533
>auntster staying over since her promotion because her new workplace is near the house
>she helps with the housework and is always doting you and keeping you company
>as a teenager you start seeing her voluptuous body with other eyes
>she can clearly see that
>one morning you two alone one weekend she asks you for some help to help her fold the laundry in the basement
>you two start playing with the laundry, since your shirts look kinda oversized on her and even she takes the clothes that you are wearing right now to throw them in the laundry
>you two start sweating a lot changing clothes and she ends up wearing just a sweaty see through shirt and you just in your underwear
>she suggest that you should throw those in the washing machine too
>you two do that and clumsily your auntster slip and grabs you, falling on top of an old mattress and you on top of her
>you can no longer hide your lust and erection and she suggests if you want to play a little game
>you two go at it the whole weekend
>later you start helping her more in the basement
>also you help her from time to time in the attic too when your momster is around
>you also take daily showers together and go for some walks from time to time, coming back with sweaty clothes and love hotel matches mysteriously in your pockets

>>47091644
some say the laundry is still in the dryer to this day

I will calmly explain to the Cupid sent to make me accept love by force with the arrows of Love that her forceful method is actually not effective for spreading love, because forcing people to accept it just makes them afraid of it and even resentful, making their mission that much more difficult when love is already hard to accept normally. I will tell her that the Erosite methods are flawed and only aid in the creation of the kind of love hating pariahs they hunt down. I will tell the Cupid that there HAS to be some better way for her to do this and that she must consider it instead of tagging me with arrows as a solution to the problem.

She will have no choice but to consider my words because my stance is very convincing, but since Cupids are not very smart she will be stuck thinking about this for a while so I will probably use the chance to just escape.

>>47091668
what's the point of having an eros pile bunker if nobody gets to use it?

>>47091644
Imagine the momster wondering how her sister keeps magically getting pregnant

>>47091668
>cupid drops her bow and cracks her knuckles
>walks up to you and puts a hand on your shoulder
>she barely presses down and forces you onto your knees, reminding you she is physically much stronger than you despite her looks
>looks you in the eye with all the emotion of a lich as she takes her beret off and begins undoing her bra
>"As you wish."
>anon spared himself of the arrows but now must face pelvis shattering rape instead

>>47091350
Yup

>>47091668
That is why the matchmaking league by Eros is the superior method and they earn a lot of wievership and revenue with the broadcast

>>47091737
I like this silly cat.

>>47091747

>>47091644
Wouldn't it be funny if the momster comes back and find the mattress wet with sweat and other bodily fluids and the clothes of her sister and her son scattered around while they are taking a "innocent family bath" upstairs with a lot of splashing noises for some reason and she still doesn't suspect a thing.

>>47091750

Catgirls that act like cats are my favorite.

>>47091747
Me too, feels like the purrfect version of something I know

>>47091767
Until a 225lb kot girl lays on your keyboard.

I hate cats. I will never adopt a pet cat.

>>47091747
>>47091750
>>47091762
What a fancy feast

>>47091350
Yes it is.

Batcats count for koturday, right?

>>47091804
One more for me
>>47091801
You shouldn't let your kot get this fat, exercise and a more restricted diet is needed

>>47091817
Batcats and birdcats are both kots.

>>47091817
>Verification not required.
Meh

>>47091820
She cries if I don't feed her what she wants when she wants.

>>47091830
Have you tried fucking her until she get fit?

>>47091843
Why do cats sometimes just freeze with their tongues out like that? System error?

>>47091876
Active buff to cuteness

>>47091880
just push the tongue back in to cancel the buff

>>47091886
Push it back in with your MOUTH.

>>47086200
>compliment her beautiful hands
She isn't letting you get away with this unscathed

Well time to go to bed, remember to keep your auntster company and let her drain your stress properly to start a new week relaxed and full of energy

>>47092028
I will keep her company by holding in an embrace all night long, face-to-face, and sniff her breath as we exchange kisses.

>Tonight. You

>>47092048
Says the one getting gaped

>>47091584
one melts your brain, the other melts your bloodstream

I like the idea that dragons overcook not know how much humans eat

>>47092132
they're all feeders

>>47092048
> I want you to meet the enforcer

>>47092132
>hunk of cheese
what the hell am i meant to do with that?

>>47092175
It's cheese, you eat it.

>>47091061
stapling

>>47092175
I'm more concerned about the bat sausages.

>>47092196
i dont think i want to meet god

>>47092132
>dragon gets mere'd
>becomes housewife
>makes lots of nutritious food for hubby
>food gives hubby lots of energy for baby making
>lots of protein also helps build muscles for better handling of dragon wife
>hubby has strength to easily pin her down whenever he wants and the energy to breed her for however long he feels
>this leads to lots of babies
>other dragons who don't make lots of food for hubby breed at slower rate
>overfeeder dragons become the norm
It's simple evolution

>>47091124
You have to start with the line:
"Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"
Then when she says "No"...
>kek

A 220cm tall Ocelomeh approaches you
looks at you
crouches down
and headbumps your chest lightly

>>47086343
The mid-drift army wwwww

what's there to watch on MGTV?

>>47092451
>regional grooming competition
>husbands show off how well they can groom and preen their wives

>>47089198
Gotta give out better choices my guy.

Infinite Option will win every time, especially if it is a waifu.

>>47092451
I just watch Dragons Daily on MGTV at 9:00 like any good human should.

>>47092451
Going by what KC says, you'd have shoujo shows and sports. Likely there would also be action shows.

>>47092451
>regional grooming competition
Hagville momsters introducing themselves to shota-anons at the local Park

>>47092451
A fucked up version of To Catch A Predator, where Christina Handsen runs a dating service for sabbath members.

>>47092451
Sitcoms with laughtracks, x-rated

I'm not sure how I feel about these biothrusters shog gave me. It's neat that I can propel myself at high velocities but expelling shog goop from my body doesn't seem like a good way to do it.

>>47092543
>guy cums right on insertion
>laughing cheshires track plays

>>47092451
MGCs Got Talent
>it's just acrobatic couples porn
Also those 'naked survival innajungle' reality shows, but its just a nude Anon dumped in the middle of downtown locations to bet on how long they say single.