/jp/ - Otaku Culture

monster girls are cringe

>>45905129

>>45905139
Only the purple feline ones.

Now for everyone to see

Marry the goat, anon.

Non-standard monster maids. Give me the minotaur maids in embarrassing outfits

>>45905178
Pyrow maids in embarrassing outfits (which they love) popping gum.

>>45905170
the ever expanding eros amorous armory

>>45905170
>Anon manages to parry a fucking mine
Now what's she gonna do?

How do we appeal to the monstergirl demographic?

>>45905257
throw a tiny net(eros) at him

>>45905257
Command grab at the same time someone shoots a homing arrow

>>45905258
The hunger games but all the contestants are men.

>>45905258
Livestram suicides

>>45905150
>I am not cringe! I am based! I am poggers!

>>45905313
Look at the cringe dork

>>45905258
A succubus or demon girl listening to Sacred Music is a funny mental picture
>Blessing and honor glory and power be onto Him be onto Him. That sitith upon the throne and onto the lamb forever and ever
>4 minutes of just Amen
>>horrified sobbing

>>45905258
What song is that tedffering ?

Do you prefer your tismhounds in classic or grape flavor

I am a parry god
Eros stands no chance!

>>45905129
it's almost the weekend
hope you all having a hebitastic week

>>45905351
i'd need to see more grapehounds to be certain

>>45905258
non-lethal battle harem combat as professional sports. a hallmark channel for mons

>>45905258
What song is that referencing?

Dragon slime, holstaur slime, or werewolf slime?

slime slime

>>45905178
Non accredited maids are the best.

>>45905173
I only want to marry lolis.

>>45905391
I wonder if she has to hold up her hair when she takes a shit.

>>45905383
love those little goobers

>>45905408
Do you think big paw girls can wipe? Those things are useless for anything but exotic handjobs.

>>45905409
This is why I still like slimes/succubi, they seem to very easily pick up traits from their environment in order to adapt

>>45905391
That's a paddling

Miss dragon might be strong, but can she beat my secret technique? It's called flower and chocolate and begging her to go out with me.

I think kc is just going through the motions
Maybey he should move on to other things?

>>45905447
the only thing that needs to move on is your obsession

>>45905416
Maybe they got buttholes likes horses.

Monsters can use magic to clean themselves, assuming that they even defecate in the first place.

It's important to keep the ass clean for anal play.

Whatever you do don't look up horse buttholes.

>Decide to prank anubis roommate
>while she is out one day boot up her favorite 'tism simulator
>Change the angle of random buildings by 45 degrees
>Shift tax and budget numbers by .5 percentage in directions decided by flipping a coin
>Pull up the family dynasty tab to mess arund witb appointed advisiors
>Find out that her avatar is a recreation of herself
>And her king is an exact replica of (you)

>>45905505
I remember reading that they're actually so effective some machinery is modeled off them.
>>45905483
It would make sense. Leaves anal as very clean too.

>>45905518
! !

>>45905518
This dude is getting cursed for weeks.

>>45905518
! !

>>45905447
Instead of worrying about him we could just move the thread topic onto greener pastures. Remember we had a big talk about cyberpunk and halo monster girl ideas a while back?

>>45905572
>Instead of worrying about him
I can't, though to be fair it may be me projecting my baggage.

prompt
office lady chōchin-obake that loves night shifts

>>45905681
maybe this childhood friend can win

>>45905681
Friend is good too.

>>45905681
Friend looks like a good friend

>>45905681
>The 'Friend' is just the doppelganger who transforms into bikini succubus

>>45905707
Damn, I want to fluff that. But spade tails are also so nice...

>>45905572
>halo monster girl ideas

>Jackamanders
>Ushi-golo
>Unggoyblin
>Sahuagheili

I like strong, gentle girls.

>>45905258
Start by remaking all disney movies.

>Beauty and the beast is about a cute nerd guy that ends in a beastgirl's castle
>Tarzan is about a guy getting raised by kakuen
>In aladdin he decides to marry the genie in the end
etc

>>45905707
BIGGER

>>45905778
Monster girls lose to mob anons.

>>45904901
Snownubis will find you and snug you

>>45905778
Same, I need to marry a nice Jinko.

>>45905800
She looks like she's waiting for me to finish signing our marriage certificate.

Sorry eros, I only want to absolute dorkiest of dorks

>>45905820
Taillet.
At least it's a chubby one.

>>45905830
must've dropped her tail in surprise

>>45905820
>>45905830
>Chode tail
Poor girl must get bullied all the time. Are their tail lengthening potions?

>>45905805
>The snow is getting worse, dear
>In 28 minutes the snow will be 2 meters high and you’ll be trapped here, my schedule did not account for your hesitation
>Please sign the document before my ear tips freeze

>>45905841
>>45905849
Considering it's small size and girth I think it will make for a tasty tail on a stick after it roasts over a fire for a bit.

>>45905129

I like the look of this mage. That's a trustworthy face. I bet she'd love to talk about herbology or astronomy or just chat about whatever.

I bet her elixirs are potent, safe, and reliable.

>>45905896
I was expecting this to be an ironic post, but... Yeah. Would sip totally not suspect tea and discuss astrology with her.

>>45905913
astrology? ew

>>45905926
You're such a Sagittarius.

>>45905896
imma put her nipples in my mouth while she does her usual npc diagolue about potion selling

>Go to monster girl strip club
>See none of the guys are giving cash to the girls
>Think they must all be jewish
>Begin throwing out 20’s and 50’s to all the girls that come up on stage
>Almost 5 AM get ready to leave
>Stopped by group of monster girl strippers
>Turns out giving money to a girl is basically a dowry and that I’m married to them all

>>45905913
>"So, do you think the guy across the road from us is going to make a move on that Weresheep?"
< "hmmm..."
>she mumbles as she checks the astrolabe and several other arcane instruments
< "They'll be meeting at the park in a few days from now, so they very well could, but who am I to spoil the surprise for the lovebirds?"

I think I'll get married to a monster girl.
And then have kids with them.
Start a family, love her lots, tell her how much I love her every night.
Maybe even move to the country for some extra space for our kids.
Celebrate our anniversaries with friends.
That'll show those monster girls.

I'm going to prevent the Cupid's from getting me by asking that nice-looking coworker of mine if she'd be willing to help me fool them that I have a relationship by asking her out for a dinner on Valentine's

Gonna make monsters embrace the red white and blue

>>45906020
indeed, vevala france

>>45906020
>Rural American Dragon Girls
what'd be really funny is if the dragons get confused after hearing about "liquid gold" and finding oil.

>>45906020

>>45906020
Using witches to cheat on my water and electricity bill!

>>45905999
> "hmmm..."
That'd be the extent of my contribution to the conversation. I'd be highly distracted by the "heavenly bodies."

>>45905447
That’s nice.

>>45906020
American wurm

Would you help a fox?

>>45906123
sure

>>45906123
If they promised to let me motorboat them before they presumably destroy the world, yeah

>>45906123
No, lest she’s actually a mob faced fox

>>45906123
Not that one.

Foxes are naturally inclined towards evil.

>>45905778
>Thick cuddly yeti gf who lets me top despite both of us knowing full well she could ride me into the bedsprings at any given moment

>>45906150

>>45905967
You're such a skibidi toilet

>>45906123
>tell ancient evil fox that the world is so gay and stupid that destroying it would be an improvement
>"...I don't know, it just doesn't feel right when you put it like that"

>>45906123
I could bring her something to drink.

how do i tell a chesh I want her to mommydom me

>>45906043
vevala? did you meant Vive la?

>>45906206
vulva la france

>>45906213
Kek, work too

chesh can ___ my ___

Local vampire is acting all coy. What could she possibly want?

foxes stink

>>45906241
kiss my britches

>>45906241
do my laundry

>>45906255
hope you like tie-dye in your wash

hahaha.... yes...

>>45906241
mow my lawn

I exist to worship anubass

>>45906311
the future of humanity is on a knife(ear) edge

>>45906020
I've been trying to explain to wurm that the gun is good and the penis is evil but she just doesn't get it.

>>45906311
Bad elves! Little boys aren't toys!

>>45906334
You may convince her the gun is good, but she will always prefer the penis.

>>45906123
>uhh, soo, do you ever get bored here?
>wanna play cards?
Cut to me and sealed fox playing uno.

>>45906360
I would've brought Monopoly. Imagine sending her into a murderous rage while there's nothing she can do about it.

a monster could not beat me at thumb wrestling

>>45906407
Surprised I like this show as much as I do, love that gremlin.

>>45905732
Huge spade tails are the best

>>45906381
Nope. Gonna play fun games with the dangerous fox, and she's going to like it. I'll bring snacks hang out with her.

>running away from Miss Cupid on valentines
>she corners me at a dead end in the city park after chasing me through most of MGC's residential area
>tell her she's not such a big angel like she thinks she is just as she's readying an arrow
>tell her she couldn't possibly correct me without her fancy bow and arrows and flying on two wings
>she lowers her bow and drops it and falls out of flight, starts walking towards me
Now's my chance! I'll just physically overpower her and get away. Cupid's nothing without her bow!

>>45906246
The undead are awfully cute for their fearsome reputations.

>>45906525
5 seconds later Anon got reverse mating pressed by cupid

>>45906544
Nah, even simpler. Anon is going to get wing burrito'd and then heart pupil and surrender to the cupid's love.
Then he can get reverse mating pressed.

I'd eat out my succ wife in public

>Anubis gets assigned mandatory vacation
>Unfortunately that means
She gets kicked out of home to ensure she doesn't just work from there
>most devastatingly of all, being locked out of her quarters means being locked out from the object of obsession for her brand of the tism
>Ends up crashing on your couch
Can (you) handle a stircrazy jackal for a week?
Can you escape with your virginity intact?

>>45906562
I'd also enjoy eating out with my succ wife in public.

>>45904384
I find a gyaru lava golem relatively easy to visualize. Diamond and Obsidian-glass jewelry, preppy clothes made out if Titanium, Tungsten, and other kinds of hard to melt metals that still go soft enough to show off that lava bouncin' but not soft enough to lose form completely, and of course the ponytail, can't ever forget it. Maybe also a cute "Active Eruption Site" or "Tourist Attraction" slogans on her clothes or handbag of heat proofing +7.

Please respond

>>45906619
...

>>45906563
I'll just let her find a new object of obsession, one that hopefully i'll be able to share and partake together in with her
Yes I can escape with my virginity intact but I don't wanna, I'd marry her in a heartbeat no matter what

Hi friends. New story:
https://archiveofourown.org/works/53163175

It's complete. I've been working on it since announcing the contest and wanted it to be special. Now I can say I contributed too, even if I am terribly late. I hope you all enjoy.
Now on to finishing Second Chances.

>>45906563
I'll just ask her if she wants to play some coop Factorio. That'll keep us both occupied until the end of the week.

>>45906667
nice, a wurm story.

>>45906299
https://files.catbox.moe/k74blv.png

Worship Pharaohs.

Verily, when I did hear that the East was host to wyrms much like our fair kingdom, I did not expect to come to find them worshiped by the locals, and tended to in great shrines by white snakes and given offers that they may provide a rain. Yae, so humble are these eastern wyrms that they do not even collect hordes, nor do they exume impoliteness as our western wyrms. As a proud knight, this culture shock conflicts me. On one hand, wyrms are foul creatures and it is a knight's duty to slay them.... on the other hand, these eastern ones are harmless, and pretty nice.

durr the MGE patreon ez guys simply leak new girls yourself it's only 5 bucks just bu-ACK!!

>>45906688
?

Completely buck broken.

>>45906667
Ah i remember this one. Glad to see you finally finished it.

>>45906701
Different story. This one is its own thing. I'll be putting a lot of time into finishing Second Chances now that I'm only working one job.

>>45906667
Need to pull something out eventually myself, haven't been writing lately.
>Words:26,594
Gonna leave that one for tomorrow.

>>45906696
the insanity that is those new plant girls having somehow not been leaked yet, and they've been under that paywall since last year so it's been ages.

>>45906738
Five bucks, nigga.

Birds and mages.

>>45906736
Man, if I can do it so can you, lol

damn rata that is crazy!

>>45906681
Brother, get out of there! One of the white snakes has viewed upon your stature with their serpent eyes! You cannot escape them when they are triggered! Flee!

>>45906755
For now I wanna do something short, then I'm gonna check if I can continue the thing I shelved last year, but let me stop now before I stop blogposting and shit.

>>45906714
I remember a thread where we talked about a wurm that had such high Faith stat that she was able to call up miracles and eventually have her own valk. Thought you had taken it to write about it, but maybe it's just coincidental.

>>45906745
didn't one anon faced issues with registration to become one tho and thus literally couldn't? so it's never always so simple and ez, sometimes pisstreon's shit.

>>45906769
Nonsense, I am a strong and proud knight clad in steel. I have nothing to fear from the pale snakes. In fact, I will prove it. I will go strike up a chat with one of those pale snakes now and come out unscathed. Watch me, brothers.

>>45906780
That was the one! Well, the whole conversation chain was the basis. Good memory! The story morphed and grew as I wrote, and I hope I did wurmy justice.

>>45906791
I am convinced all this mge posting is three-ish anons and the romanian desperately trying to keep it as thread focus.

Monster mashup!
What are your two favorite monsters? What would their hybrid be like?
For example, for me it's a baphomet wight, a wightomet if you will

chesh if you don't take your meds im going to administer them rectally

>>45906831

>>45906821
No clue, but vast majority of the anti-mge posting is definitely one obsessed irish schizo.

>>45906831
Jinko and Bogey. I feel like she'd have more traits of the latter, but I hope for muscular physique of the former.

>>45905258
Fine literature.
>Sunset found her squatting in the grass, humping her groaning husband. Every spurt was thicker than the one before. By the time the moon came up, he was ejaculating pudding. The more she humped the more he spurt, but the more he spurt, the hornier she grew.

>>45906831
>Inari
>Oomukade
I can imagine several ways to fuse them.
>fluffy insectoid girl with fox ears and mofu arms. lower half is a centipede with fluffy hair covering it
>Humanoid foxgirl with antennae and fluffy centipede tail instead, as well as neck mandibles.

>>45906842
Obsessed with running a tavern with meidri!

>>45906831
gremlin and hellhound.
probably some mad scientist who needs to regularly inject stuff into their bloodstream to not go full mindless rape machine on her husband.

>>45906681
I met a wyrm the other day. She gave me a large gemstone because she thought I looked hungry, I had to explain that humans don't eat gemstones but I thanked her for it anyway. All in all it was positive experience.

wyrms and wurms... all trite.
i met a wirm the other day, and she was CRAZY

>>45906900
I bet you've never seen a Wórm before.

>>45906873
Mediri is likable and wholesome.

Würms are where it's at.

Elves are overrated skinny broads you say???

for me it's the Wgrm

Ze Vurm

Man I love jinkos

the wurm has turned :O

Wgrrm shitting diamonds and riding a fat pink mast!

>>45906935
I wanna marry one.

>>45906935
Too weak a stripekot to catch anyone slipping as they gather river water. Sad!

>>45906935
Spot supremacy!

>>45906986
lewd ocelomeh armpit

>>45906986
See spot run, more like.

>>45906986
Spots and stripes can coexist since a man can pat both at the same time

>>45906986
I respect Ocelomeh, but I need a woman with stripes and large muscles.

>>45906745
here, do it you'reself dood https://www.patreon.com/MGE

>>45907001
What if I want her to give me pats instead?

>>45907001
But man has only two hands in which to pat, and half the pats is half the love.
Half of love is lo, which is how you'll make them feel.

>>45906935
Take it easy with the /k/ militarism please!

i'll just be oppressively sad in front of the ocelomeh

>>45907015
Then you have two kots patting you. What's not to love?

>>45906831
bogie wurm
a funny and crafty wurm
very dangerously cute and doesn't like meanies at all

>when the monster girl jrpg protagonist party confronts me, the final boss and main antagonist wizard, at the opening to the gigantic magical rift in the sky I opened up to consume and destroy the world and the monster girl main protagonist steps forward and says "Why!? Why, wizard anon? Why destroy the world?! Is it a life of not being loved? Have you lost faith in humanity...? Tell us why! Why you're trying to destroy our beautiful world!"
I just thought it'd be funny haha. I'm a wizard, I have no sense of right or wrong. Hahahaha.

>>45907038
Bogie correction because they have both a sense of humor and a strong sense of morality.

>>45907013
KC already made over 200 girls, that’s more than enough for me.The new ones are often unappealing imho. China has a yellow slime, covered in eyes, that makes you talk weird! Does that strike anyone else as a bit hackneyed? Good thing he didn’t give her control over some variety of social credit too.

I can outrun a Centaur.

>>45907083
>when a man peaks with cait sith

>when a man peaks w-AAAAIIIIEEEE CARAMBA WE LOST THE FALKLANDS WAR!!!!!!!
Huh?

>>45907113
To be fair, a smaller output means that the misses will be more not. But which fetishes aren’t covered by a monster at this point? There’s (arguably) two vore monsters. What more does KC truly need to do?

>>45905129
>>45905129
Will you be able to tell the difference between aan playing with a regular doll and a man playing with a Living Doll?

>>45907135
*more noticeable

>>45907119
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SjgYMLJW0k

would monsters hate violent videogames and television shows?

>>45907173
They used to murder and eat people, probably not.

Seriously, what fetishes require some new monster?

>>45907178
need monsters that miss "the good old days"

>>45907173
100%. At least the murdery stuff. Literally nothing is more important to them than love and living, so why would they be interested in watching something that goes against that?

>>45907188
sweat fetish monster?

>>45907194
Malefs are made for that. And baphomets. And maybe a lilim who wants to usurp her mother and become a new tyrant. Or maybe all of them at once in an axis of evil.

>>45907173
Monsters can understand the concept of fiction.
>>45907206
Malefs are the "my ancestor :)" meme.

>>45907194
Cue the scene and image of a Boomer Mamononsl slurping Zero Sugar Monster:

>*Schlurp* "Yep, dems the good days."

>>45907194
Family friendly versions exist. Ogre and Umi-Osho get off to violence. Add Amazoness, Dark Elf, and Malef for anachronistic monster supremacy.

>>45907205
Pay the Troll toll or get High on Orc sweat.

>>45907205
Akaname and Devil Bug.

I am the King of a human realm. I will never surrender our sovereignty as humans to monsters, least of all Elves. Elves will never rule humans.

>>45907217
What if i don't pay the troll toll? Tolls are an unfair way of the powerful to the weak. I will not let myself get vullied by a mere troll.

>>45907225
>implying elves want to rule humans

>>45905129
So what is the fate of Divorce Courts, Divorce Lawyers and the "Divorce Industry" once MGE monster girls come and take over? Especially the Eros monsters and Eros and Mara themselves? Think of the poor Divorce Lawyers, what judgement do they get?

>>45907104
>tfw you will never humiliate a pack of native centaurs with your iron horse of human enginuity

>>45907252
Like usual, the Matango pit treatment.

>>45907239
*to bully the weak

>>45907239
Then you won’t get in her hole something something nightman ah aaah.

>>45907252
Monsters don't accept divorce so you become a master duelist. Its more like an extermination service with an optional service of dealing with any uppity monster that brings up any soulmate bullshit by referring to an exorcism specialist.

>>45906746
I don't like mages, or witches. I've heard a lot of stories about them in Salem

>>45907245
The only king most elves want to rule over is Burger King.
>They're American food loving FATTIES
AND THAT'S WHY THEY'RE HOT

>>45907178
>Monsters aren't "cute", human. If we met in the old days I would have eaten you without a second thought.

>>45907252
Superseded by trial by coombat, like everything else.

>>45907277
So uhh, how much is that toll?

>>45907289
Cool story bro.

>>45907295
All of your liquid assets.

>>45907304
Not my choccy milk...

>>45907289
Wow, lewd. At least buy me dinner first, miss hagon.

>>45907279
So get someone to fight her off for you? It all turns back into champions and trial by combat, cool. Lawyer becomes an interesting occupation again.

>>45907289
"I'm sorry, Miss, but I am autistic."
"Are you tsundere or actually annoyed with me?"

>>45907320
At least she isn’t taking your froot snacks too dork.

>>45907206
I would say Malefs are still living in the "good ol days" Though the method and objective has changed, fundamentally they are still monster/dragon supremacist so it's very fulfilling to accomplish that objective with human husbands that worship them instead.

>>45905129

>>45905365
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FHvP_Yv0wE

hope she doesn't read the comment section

>>45907406
my wife when wanting to commemorate our anniversary

>>45907212
>amazoness
Turbo gay
>dark elf
Gay
>malef
Gay
>umi-osho
Gay
>orge
Based if maledom

CURSE OF RA

>>45907406
Oh, no, a cute dork in an office lady outfit.
How horrifying.

>>45907458
It's never maledom here.

>>45907494
It's OCCASIONALLY maledom.

>>45906525
How did you have time to type this?

>>45906831
Shog and flayer
They work well, and I'd love to be able to shift into a hentai tentacle goo monster to dom my wife sometimes despite being her bitch most of the time. Then there's all the cozy mind stuff we can do together, and the fact me sleeping in my bed is cuddling her
No escape from the best waifu, she's just...perfect in everyway, I love shog flayer

I need a work place support familiar.
Mostly as I spent about a day on a fax issue caused by a location's inability to get toner.

>>45907083
The two plant girls are nice

I need to be a workplace support familiar for a dark mage

>>45906667
so good

>>45907536
Nobody asked though.

>>45907499
Would bulli.

>>45906635
Mantises(Manti?) are some of the scariest monsters, they give sociopathic vibes.

>>45907487
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZeXQeyv-VE
I'm going to cough up cinnamon all over her LEGOs.

>>45907536
Getting your clothes destroyed is a shit fetish. These are bespoke threads. Bespoke!

i need a wurm familiar

>>45907563
That's because insects are the furthest thing from humanity beyond maybe plants. They are brutal aliens.

>>45907576
>have sex with mantis
>eats your head
Pretty scary. Pretty brutal. Insect girls deserve one thing.

>>45907576
Insect girls are extremely cute.

>>45907581
Brainless and unmerciful dicking?

>>45907575
>Still familiar sized but looses some magical ability for physical increases
>Just as cheerful as the normal familiar and comes with the bright colors of them as well.
>Also breaks out the 'leg snek boot' technique.
Truly familiars are versatile girls.

>>45907587
no shes big and meaning looking but wears really frilly clothes
her name is lil' suzzy

>>45907576
You need to be brutally orgied by roaches.

>>45906831
Excellent taste, I'm a bapholich man myself. Official Renrushka art when?

>>45907603
Hopefully never.

>>45906831
Not really a fan of mixing girls together but I am inclined to think of a Hellhound that got trapped in Wonderland, her getting bullied by the purple kot and her mana would have made some changes of course.

>>45907572
it's not that for me, it's the fact I'll be dragged into them. their perpetual prey to be, forever. just the two of use snuggling and having sex trapped inside of them sounds so cozy.
I'm not wormfood by the way, I swear
pic very unreal

>>45907622
>dragged into them. their perpetual prey to be, forever. just the two of use snuggling and having sex trapped inside of them

>>45907623
Stop being tempted by monsters and demons and the heavens will surely reward you.

>>45907637
i want an angel wurm

>>45907635
You mean dryfished?
Getting caught by monsters isn't a win. If they are hunting for men there is a good reason for that.

>>45907571
Okay but that's just rude

>>45907640
>If they are hunting for men there is a good reason for that.
Yeah, the men they want are tsundere.

Raging mushroom is the most based thing in MGE
femdomfags eternally seething

>>45907637
>the heavens will surely reward you.
yea but would they reward me a blue wife? demon can give me blue wife right now

>>45907637
You are being discriminatory against the mortally challenged, not all Angels reside in Heaven.

>>45907650
I'm fighting back against the autism dog

>>45907669
You know what's better for maledom than raging mushrooms?
Money. Show them you own them by outright commodifying them.

>>45907686
Pic unrelated? That's a fox.

>>45907701
My bad, it was in my noobis folder

>>45907708
Noob-is

>>45907708
Shiny skin is my weakness

>>45907722

>>45907722
Imagine rubbing oil all over your schedule wans body. Slowly kneading it in as she relaxes after hard day of giving orders to you her head slave in charge of constructing her pyramid.

mgs vs speedrunners

>>45907736
Dont forget those shiny coat oils and crushing it through really slowly

>>45907780
>>45907788

how is that legal?

>>45907788
A classic

>>45907781
Can't forget the hair paw and tail oils, nothing quite like making sure her beans and tail are soft.

I have an appreciation for the holy

>>45907806
Holy more like holy cringe stop posting this yurifaggot's shitty artwork

>>45907812
Hail to you, anon who hates everything.

>>45907788
I like how even the sun is concerned.

>>45907680
>*discriminating against the morally challenged
Ftfy.

>>45907788
>Buenos deus
I should complain, but Good God approves of that rape. Nothing to see here folks.

>>45907526
120 words per minute bitch

>>45907135
A monster with the power of flight, telekinesis, and the power to move you

do you still jerk it to mgs still?

How do you think monster girls deal with anons who just want to be left alone?

I've successfully trapped the Mindflayer that was after me inside my basement and locked her inside. Now I will burn down the house with her in it and escape this horrible place and be free of her forever! I should have known better than to move to Innsmouth just because the living costs were pretty low. I'm never going back!

>>45908047
>Anon thinks he’s pouring gasoline
>Is throwing rose petals leading up to his bed
>Anon thinks he’s starting a fire
>Is lighting up candles
>Anon thinks he’s leaving through the front door
>Is opening the basement
>Anon thinks he’s escaped
>Is now cuddling his mindflayer wife

>>45908047
>I've successfully trapped the Mindflayer that was after me inside my basement and locked her inside.
She let you do that, she's getting super horny thinking how much work you're doing and how delicious the rape will be after you fail

How do I beat Ms. Mummy’s meta dragon deck with my off meta trash deck?

>>45907791
MGs make all the laws.

>>45908158
I dunno, I don't really play pokemon

I'm gonna play a really funny prank on a Lilim where I sneak an engagement ring on to her finger while she sleeps!

>>45908036
no i mostly just press up against the wall my bed is against and pretend it is a monster's loving embrace

>>45908036
Mostly I jerk to human incest porn or cartoon futas. Anything that makes me think I would directly be involved in the sex just makes my brain seize up and reject it, so I need to keep things pretty demented to get off.

I got stuck in traffic and I'm gonna be late to my dinner
Does anyone know a good countercurse?

>>45908241
you're going to need an immunity dog to get out of this one

ded hours

I remember some guy saying he was going to draw yanderes, did he do it?

>>45908364

>>45908430
All this proves is that IRL spooder girls would be amazing at cuddles.

If evil, why hot?

If Monster girls were real and portals opened, we would kill them.

>>45908364
Did three. More will come soon.

>>45908499
<3.

>>45908499
B-b-based

Goodnight Anons, take care and don't burn down the thread.

Instead, remember that geizah beams can make for impressive lightshows.
Just don't get hit by any of them, they're actually quite strong despite being short and naked.

>>45908554
Geizah? More like GAYzer lmao gottem

Reject modernity. Embrace worm. And also this kiki who I'm not really sure what she does all day.

>>45908481
That's why they send over their glowie equivalents first. Gonna be real hard to shoot a sexy nun or a panda, especially if they've already seduced half your friends and the local PD.

>>45908574
She sweeps up the sand that gets everywhere

Hug monsters when you have a fever to transfer as much body heat as possible!!

>>45908623
Imagine lamia wives struggling with worry but also happiness when their husbands get a fever.

I hope the portals dont open
I would instantly get squished

>>45908574
cyberworm

>>45908623
Try Huffing Hellwan fluff, no longer will you fear any illness, nor temps including Lava, nor will extreme cold bother you. Total Environmental Immunity. Though The Holy Element might be trouble.

>>45908664
>nukis sell "hell mofu" patches
>when sniffed they grant extreme long lasting buffs...
>but at a cost of going into the negatives on holy resistance
>recently fallen angels prey on people sniffing hell mofu patches because they can use their lingering holy energy to get an easy husband

Grant me your dorkiest dork

>>45908713
>Cheshire Holding a Mirror facing anon.

>>45908713

Guys help I think my anubis might be defective

>>45908728
See, all vampires and their relatives are dorks (this includes especially YOU, the MEGA DORK Dhampirs)

I'm gonna tell a Dragon she's not worth my time.

>>45908731
Nah man you're fine, the tattoos still say ! !, working as intended, don't call the helpline again unless something actually voided the warranty

I will reject an Anubis.

I saw my self in the mirror before going to work this morning. Maybe getting catch by a mamono wouldn't be too bad

saw my self in the mirror before going to work this morning. Maybe getting caught by a mamono wouldn't be so bad, I shouldn't hyper focusing on never losing

Is the best place to find thick mermaids at Winterstown lake?

>>45909299
Go ye to the ice-fishing lodges
There to find the old men with their thermoses full of strong coffee, their underwear long and their talk quiet so as not to scare the fish away
From them you may learn the tricks

I'm going to Antarctica, I wills study cute seals far from those annoying mamonos. What should I bring as an extra? Everyone in my office says that I should bring my werecat colleague but I don't understand why.

>cute little Mad Hatter and Cheshire kids come up to me and ask if I'd like to play tea party with them at the MGC national park when I'm just trying to have a nice walk by myself
>annoyed, but come over to their little table where they have tea and cake
>they expect me to sit down in a child sized chair
>in the middle of the Hatter kid explaining to always extend the pinkies when drinking tea, I reach over and knock the cake off the table onto the grass and say I made a mistake sarcastically
>Cheshire kid says its fine and goes to pick up the cake tray
>when she does I grab the back of her head and shove her face into the dropped cake and smush it
>Mad Hatter kid panics and says to stop because I'm hurting the Chesh, who's now crying
>me? hurting them?
>tell them they're monsters, who have enslaved my human race, they deserve a little pain back
>Chesh tells me through tears she just wanted to have fun with her friend
>laugh and let go of the at and then kick their table over, scaring both of them
>tell them that this world isn't a nice place, and that monsters like them are stupid because they think they can just be happy all the time
>tell them that one day they'll probably forget each other and won't even remember all these good times because they'll grow up and move on with life, because friendship is just fake, they'll definitely stab each other in the back at some point
>tell these two dumb kids that happiness isn't real and to get used to it and leave them there to cry
Stupid fucking monsters. I just want to go about my day and be left alone and there's always one that just has to fucking bother me. I hope those dumbass kids remember that for the rest of their lives. They'll be just as despondent as me when they grow up, there's no way they'll be happy when they're adults. Just watch what I'm saying.

>>45909405
Hello yes I hate this post very much
Please delete it

>scary old Mad Hatter and Cheshire kids come up to me and declare I'm joining them for a play tea party at the MGC national park when I'm just trying to have a nice walk by myself
>annoyed, but am quickly intimidated into a mewling agreement by their death stares
>they demand I sit down in a chair that's too big for a human like me
>in the middle of me explaining I need to leave, hatter reaches over and knock the cake off the table onto the grass and says she made a mistake sarcastically
>I mumble it's fine, then get up to put the tray back on the table and make a quick get away now that I'm up
>when I do, chesh grabs the back of my head and shoves my face into the dropped cake and smush it
>I panic and ask them to stop because I'm being humiliated and I'll cry
>Them? Hurting me?
>tell me I've been a VERY bad body, who hurt a pair of kids just having some fun, they deserve a little pain back
>Chesh tells me through tears (of laughter) she just wanted to have fun with her friend
>Hatter laughs and positions her butt where the cake was - a nice/not so nice place that scares me
>tell me that my face is a nice face, and that humans like me are stupid because they think they can just go about their day without being facesat by sweaty, fat-bottomed hatters
>tell me that one day I'll forget what my life was like before chesh and hatter came along, and I won't even remember all the bad things I did because I'll have started a life with them, because my bravado is fake, and I'll betray my honour just to huff more of their asses.
>tell me i'm just a dumb kid (i'm in my 30s) compared to them, but they are mature ladies who can look after a dumb kid like me, and then they give me a nursing handjob while wiping away my tears

>>45909405
And then the Hatter and Chesh found grumpy anon again when they were both grown up and proved him completely wrong and then raped him into a better, happier person. The end.

>scary old Mad Hatter and Cheshire hags come up to me and declare I'm joining them for a tea party at the MGC national park when I'm just trying to have a nice walk by myself
>annoyed, but am quickly intimidated into a mewling agreement by their death stares
>they demand I sit down in a chair that's too big for a human like me
>in the middle of me explaining I need to leave, hatter reaches over and knock the cake off the table onto the grass and says she made a mistake sarcastically
>I mumble it's fine, then get up to put the tray back on the table and make a quick get away now that I'm up
>when I do, chesh grabs the back of my head and shoves my face into the dropped cake and smush it
>I panic and ask them to stop because I'm being humiliated and I'll cry
>Them? Hurting me?
>tell me I've been a VERY bad body, who hurt a pair of kids just having some fun, they deserve a little pain back
>Chesh tells me through tears (of laughter) she just wanted to have fun with her friend
>Hatter laughs and positions her butt where the cake was - a nice/not so nice place that scares me
>tell me that my face is a nice face, and that humans like me are stupid because they think they can just go about their day without being facesat by sweaty, fat-bottomed hatters
>tell me that one day I'll forget what my life was like before chesh and hatter came along, and I won't even remember all the bad things I did because I'll have started a life with them, because my bravado is fake, and I'll betray my honour just to huff more of their asses.
>tell me i'm just a dumb kid (i'm in my 30s) compared to them, but they are mature ladies who can look after a dumb kid like me, and then they give me a nursing handjob while wiping away my tears

>>45907392
>getting raped by a smug malef while she monologues about how the rules have changed but the war isn't over

>>45908623
Hey man, are you using that?

>>45908430
>papi the dumpy harpy

>cute little Mad Hatter and Cheshire kids come up to me and ask if I'd like to play tea party with them at the MGC national park when I was about to drink some booze
>Tired, but come over to their little table where they have tea and cake
>sit down on the grass, I'm scared to break gheir child sized chair
>in the middle of the Hatter kid explaining to always extend the pinkies when drinking tea, I reach over and knock the cake off the table because I already drunk some of my booze
>Cheshire kid says its fine and goes to pick up the cake tray
>when dshe does I excuse myself and say that I will be back in 10 minutes
>Rush to bakery and buy a few different cakes and sweets
>Run back carefully
>Mad Hatter kid panics and says that they're too much thing to eat
>Invite nearby men and monsters
>tell them that I will help with brewing more tea
>Chesh tells us funny jokes
>laugh and let go of all the stress from work
>Tell them thank you for the tea and great time but I need to leave
>Go back to my flat feeling good
>Sleep
MGC can be ok sometimes

>>45909735
MGC is a cyberpunk dystopia where even if you suicide a lich will bring you back until you pay your dues to the corporation.

>>45909753
I like chrooooms, they make me stronger. It even give an even ground with Mamonos

>>45909753
You WILL cum in the wage cage, wagie

>>45909405
I hate femdom but this is just vile, fuck you anon.

>>45909852
You WILL have sex with overworked demon lawyer
You WILL listen to her complain at dinner over an “updated autopsy report”
You WILL have stress relief sex with her
You WILL knock her up
You WILL be happy

>>45909753
What are they gonna do if I don't pay, kill me? lmao

>>45909949
My demonwife works hard so its the least I could do

>>45910036
No but you will have to join a gang. Choose the nekuza, best implants and fights

How do i stop my minotaur/ogre daughter from flipping her pancakes so hard they go through the ceiling?

>>45910095
Have her make them outdoors. Worst case she'll just knock out an unlucky harpy.

>>45910095
you've got to stop your wife from sending positive reinforcement.
if you're not careful, she'll be tearing doors off their hinges soon (just like her mother)
send positive reinforcement with pancakes when she uses her strength responsibly.
ignore the inevitable replies telling you to let her go full tard strength 100% of the time - they are ogres in disguise.

My cat asked for some milk, so I went to the store and bought her a gallon of whole milk and she isn't satisfied. She's hissing at me and getting cranky. What do I do??? I got her milk so why is she still angry?!

>>45910095
Let her use all of her strength so she can impress a guy with how hard she can flip a pancake

>>45910255
>A trio of teenage pigeon harpies circles the "Magic Pancake House"
>Somehow, every morning, it flings pancakes up into the air.
>The young harpies grab those pancakes and then swoop off to class.

>Meanwhile, Miss Mino is convinced her pancakes are hitting orbit.

I don't care what Miss Troll who lives across in the apartment across the hall says about my diet, I'll eat whatever I want. I'll eat as much junk food and drink as many sodas as I want. She can't dictate my life to me. What does it matter if what I'm eating is 'bad for me'? We've all gotta die some day.

>>45910245
It's a werecat?

>>45910492
Shit, no. Anon's hatter wife has him on enough hallucinogens that I'm shocked he can use a keyboard.

>>45910245
How many tails does your cat have?

>>45910492
It was clearly stated it's a cat. A werecat could just talk to him.

>>45910409
Tell that to her face. Dont forget to be hyper specific about how unhealthy you are eating and how much literal junk you feed on. That will theach her.

>>45910526
We usually call werecat, cat or kot here so I want to make sure

>>45910409
Wait until I explained her that I drink two monster energy to skip meals

>>45910526
Cats can't talk, and anon srated she asked for milk. He most likely brought skimmed milk instead of whole.