/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>44872448
It's the season of the witch

>For the last time, I am not a heckdoggo, heckpupper, or heckin wooferino.

Posting this jiangshi because you beat me to making the thread.

hellwan love

i came this thread in the name of crabitalism

>>44872461
>grumpy cakehound is too jaded to even rape you

>>44872462
She appears disappointed

Be careful of witches...

>>44872460
Time for handing out gingerbread to little boys.

>>44872469
gross

>>44872471
Well then, she probably won't have any problems with me taking off my shirt and doing stretches.

>>44872481
You sound rather... crabby.

>Someone post about embarrassing vampires last thread
>thread immediately gets archived
Who could be behind this I wonder

>>44872481
nobody asked you,fag

>>44872506
You're clever man, Van Anon, for one who has yet to live a single lifetime.

Don't tease the Vampire TOO much, anon

>>44872481
>>44872510
Now kiss, Alps h-hot

>>44872511
What's she gonna do? Rape me? She can't even enter my house without my permission.
>B-but you heave to leave your home eventually
Nah, work from home and only order food home. She'll never get me. She can sit outside and seethe.

>>44872535
>order food to your house
>deliverywoman is really pale and asks to use your bathroom

>royal but goofy vampire wife blurts out "[X] lifetimes! ah. ah. ah." every 80-100 years
>manage to scare her really good one day that she almost hits her head on the ceiling.
>takes her a minute to calm down
>she looks right at you
>"seven lifetimes. ah. ah. ah."

>>44872541
>hand her a jar

>>44872461
Dommy doggy!

To all 'big boned' vamps out there;
Dont drink blood,
drink blood lite!

She can't go back in the TV if you play video games on it

>>44872535
We have already established vampires can enter your house through loopholes if you aren't careful. Ordering food is setting yourself up for trouble.
>order food
>delivery man comes in hand you your food, everything is as expected.
>open the Pizzabox, see a strand of hair held on with ducktape on the inner side of the lid
>What the fuck, you think to yourself
>hear glass breaking in the kitchen, followed by heavy breathing.
Vampires are very old, and very intelligent.

>>44872715
The other problem is that she ate all my pizza and her huge tits won't fit through the screen now

>>44872506
Vampires are fucking dorks

>>44872745
EROTIC dorks

Earth will fall on its own sword.
Hoisted on its own petard.
When monsters discover our pencil skirts and suits, it is over.

>>44872758
The only thing erotic about that vampire is that if you get boob window paizuri from her it looks like a ghost in the mirror

>>44872760
>portals open but it's two years into the post-apocalypse and you've already joined a cannibal biker gang

>>44872795
>Manticores take over the gang
>it's now a "cannibal" biker gang

>>44872722
I want a borderline yandere vampire to come and try and get me.

im gonna become a garlic smuggler

>>44872469
How cancerous

I am gonna rub garlic puree all over my body.

>>44872715
I dont want her to go back. If she goes back, who am I supposed to cuddle in the night?

>>44872795
Ahah won't happen since I'm weak and will die from my disease in the first weeks.

Accidentally pressed esc in the middle of a long greentext. fml

Vampires are harmless, and are actually more scared of you than vice versa.
Their puny fangs cant even pierce skin, so dont worry.

Imagine managing and commanding warkots

She's a monstergirl alright

>>44873057
War
What is it good for, absolutely nothing

>>44872839
>rich yanvamp falls in love with anon
>at first, she tries to win him over with lavish gifts and sexy displays.
>anon ignores all of it
>Vampire doesn't give up, after all, she enjoys a good hunt
>She starts stalking anon from outside his house, looking for rivals. Any mamono that dares come close to him is immediatly taken care of
>she buys anons hose and the plot of land it sits in
>it doesn't work. Turns out she still has to be invited in the house the first time if it's not empty, even if she's the owner
>but at öeast he doesn't need to pay a mortage anymore
>she pulls some strings and changes the register to marry herself to anon and to state she's a cohabitant of his house
>Nothing. Poetically, a piece of paper holds no power by itself
>Yanvamp starts getting nervous.
>She wiretaps any outgoing communications from anons house.
>goes over his browsing and telefone history in the hopes of knowing him better. Any information she gains makes her feel like she's ever so closer to her ''stubborn lover''
>starts sending increasingly personal gifts, passionate love letters and calls from unknown numbers.
>anon rejects all of it. No letter read, no gift accepted, no message heard.
>She even professed her love out loud in front of anons door, with no reaction from him other that calling the police
>The vampire never had so much effort in something. At this point her skin was starting to deteriorate, and her eyes looked worn
>but she wouldn't stop, love was worth it after all
>She decides to put aside her nobility and arrogance aside.
>starts getting crafty, comes up with an underhanded plan. She was ashamed of herself to stoop so low, but she would never give up.
>anon always had his stuff delivered to him from different places, but she could always intercept the delivery
>he never had any sizable package delivered to him, and he always inspected them before entering, so no way she could get in by just delivering herself.
>However, he had made a huge mistake. His food was always from the same store, elivered by the same guy.
>It was a friday night, and anon was in the mood for some pizza
>Everything went as usual, anon enjoys the food while sitting in front of his PC
>But that wasn't an ordinary pizza
>it had her blood mixed in it, which not only means he accepted her inside her house, he accepted her inside im as well.
>You could say he had accepted her inside his heart
>That was enough, the disheveled vampire knocked down his door, and before anon could realize what happened, she grabbed him from his chair and threw him on his bed.
>but what followed was no frenzied rape
>Instead, she straddled him with teary eyes, and confessed deperately, asking anon what she had done wrong, what is it she was missing that would make him hers.
>Anon had no choice but to listen to the bloodsucker, forced to confront what torture he had inflicted onto her
>And something had changed, as anon embraced her back in silence, patting her head gently.
>He had understood hers was genuine love. Love that needed to be reciprocated.
>he kissed the vamp and promised her that, even if it was harrd for him to let someon inside his heart, his door would be forever open for her.

Is this Vampire a Ventrue or a Daeva?

The law clearly states that any nearby man must offer his face as a pillow whenever a vampire wishes to sit down.

>>44873172
>t. butthurt dog loser

What to do if a vampire starts arguing with a STOP sign?

Ideas for doodles?

>>44873471
A monster of your choice disco dancing with an afro, purple sunglasses and shiny silvery clothing

>>44873471
Holstaur in a witch costume for Halloween.

>>44873471
Dormouse cuddles

>>44873471
A single, drunk oni/ogre/winegote giving unsolicited advice on love/dating to some random guy, and getting way too close someone she just met

>>44873471
VERY fluffy spider brushing her spider fluff.

>>44873471
A Vampire and a Vamp mosquito biting the same anon

>>44873471
Winter Anubis drinking hot cocoa

Shit, I should start drawing and writing too, and stop procrastinating.

>>44873471
Anon sniffing danuki breath.

>>44873471
Call center jinko asking anon to redeem

>>44873276
Oddly sweet. I love it.

>>44873471
Anon telling vampire to Begone spinster, she doesn’t belong in his room

>>44873490
Sweet Druella, that snake has moves!

>Hehe. My love.

>>44873942
Very nice.

>>44873942
Amazing, she's
stayin' alive, stain' alive
ah-ah-ah-ah

>>44873057
I figure monster wars are kind of like GI Joe. Once a week, a bunch of people in goofy uniforms shoot each other with color-coded laser guns over a plot that doesn't amount to anything, but it is fun to watch.

>>44873794
Good to see at least someone liked it.

>>44873956
Is it really satisfying to make love to and impregnate a muscly buff woman with abs?

>"A world without day is a terrible one indeed, but without a knight tis just pure misery isn't it? Fortunately for thee, I am here"

>>44874080
Literally 100% off-topic, you didn't even bother inserting a single monster girl reference this time

>>44874112
It looks familiar though.

>>44873536
Pumpkin latte or something, I don't know, we don't have that where I live

I love creepy dorks so fucking much

>>44874112
You don't want a blonde hair blue eyed lady knight (in anime art form) to rizz and charm you?

>>44873942
>>44874231
cute!

>>44874235
I don't care, take it elsewhere.

>>44874231
meh

>>44874236
Hard agree.

Never visiting zipangu again, damn fox tricked me and now she's having kits

>>44874231
noice

>>44874231
Very nice, thanks man.

>>44874321
You can't trust foxes to do anything but advance the fox agenda.

>>44874249
THE DRAGONCEL GOT ME!
BROTHERS HELP ME!
ARE THESE EROS BULLETS EVEN WORKING?

Men are property.

Vampires are weak to whip play

>>44874475
"The men in the streets are free you can just take them!"

>>44874475
no, own monsters

>>44874549
>masochist manticore tries everything to trick sub anon into dominating her and fulfill her perverted fantasies of someone just grabbing and using her tail as a mere onahole
This is my fetish

>>44874556
Those aren't handlebars, those are handrails!

Oh no, (You) got HOUNDED

on no!

>>44873990
Weekly episodes of "Monstergirls und Panzer".
>it actually makes more sense using Demonsilver ammo in Sensha-do than GuP physics not killing exposed commanders or impact injuries.

>>44874533
>Be minding your own business
>Get picked up off the street like a ruck sack by an Oni

>>44874654
ha, paizuri religion.

>>44874649
It looks more like the hound got (ME)'d instead.

>>44874661
Floof tankdriver is everyAnon's favorite little Tism-wan.
Wight-school drink tea in their tank.

>>44872448

>>44873471
big booty hatter

>>44874680
You sure?
>anon not so smug after being brutally rode by a swollen extra horny hellhound

>>44873471
Dick whipped hellhound sneaking beef jerky behind her vegan hubby

>>44873956
>draw a human girl
>call it a robot
Why are Asians like this?

I dreamed about a pair of twin succubi and an Alice moving in with me last night

>>44874582
Yeah maso manti make my rock hard, any link for the full pic ?

>>44874845
Because to your typical pleb, even the most basic catgirl is already too weird

>>44873942
Hebi too stronk

>>44874861
Check the manticore gallery on neocities, it's #175

>>44874934
Thanks anon

>>44874852
It was a really comfy dream, and unfortunately I wasn't able to retain a lot of it afterwards.

>>44874845
Japanese love cosplay monsters.

>>44874963
Two succs seem a bit overwhelming, I bet they melted your brain so you wouldn't remember how much hand holding and hugs you did. You're lucky to escape that dream with all your levels intact.

>>44874998
I remember there were a lot of sweet kisses and that they'd often set up Alice in ecchi scenarios for me.

Elves are degenerates.

>>44875054
I'm partial to rabbits.

>>44875077
Schizo scribbles, my beloved.

i just want a cow and a snake

>>44875189
One snekcow coming right up!

achoo

>>44875203
needs horns

>>44875203
suckable snektits

>>44874654
sauce?

>>44875276
It's the new hop game.

>>44875189
the humble milksnek

>>44875350
is he crying or does he have drool on his face?

>>44875370
Yes.

>>44875350
she doesnt look humble...

>>44875375
aw. poor boy.

>>44872461
Sagging hag tits

>>44872519
Bleh!

>>44874649
nah i got ELFD instead

To overcome the mummy's curse
simply quote an apophis verse

>>44873172
It's fun though, as long as it's monster girl war where nobody gets killed and any lost limbs are either easily replaced or a fetish thing

>>44875480
Our ladys quite the portly one,
(though rarely does she eat)
She cracks apart the bones of gods,
and sucks out all the meat.

>>44875498
dog days got it right

Hag fight!

Playing baby crying noises on a hidden speaker through my troll neighbour's walls until she gets the point

>>44874649
Chaos, Baphomet, Eros - I evoke thee, please save me from this fate!

Would you cum in a mass of flesh and googly eyes that was shaped like a cute girl?

>>44875550
if she sets the mood right

>>44875550
Probably, yeah.

>>44874231
>nothing underneath the pumpkin
what a lewd cow. i'll take three.

>>44875550
is she nice?

Local paladins will be coming to assist in keeping you away from those dastardly monsters. Any monster activities you come across should be reported to them. Make sure not to hold back any information, no matter how red in the face they get!

>>44873276
The fun part about kissing vampires is that it puts your neck right next to her mouth

>>44875632
It is a well known fact that vampires that used to be human have a large weak point in the point where they were bit while being turned. Small kisses and licking of this point can turn a vampire into putty in your arms.

>>44875529
Sneak into her house and install a bunch of grow lights. Once rape mode is activated, all you have to do is ask nicely.

>>44875642
i'll suck out of the venom from her wound and save her

Vampires in the before current DL era were actually the size of cats and swung from branch to branch like monkeys and sucked blood like bats. Few know this

>paladinposting
>gacha shitposting
It's been 12 hours would you raiding faggots give it a rest

>>44875610
I dont need no stinky paladins, I'm still waiting for Eros to make good on that "72 virgin Houri" deal she gave me.

>>44875529
Wrestling your troll aunty to the ground because she lets you win. Dicking your troll aunty for being a good sport

>>44875665

ten naked baphomets in showers of ram ranch

>>44875672
Who better to ensure your reward than this hood order paladin! Did you know, only .01% of Eros worshipers ever get their promised virgins? Why is this? Monsters, that’s why! Order paladins will ensure you get what you deserve in the end good citizen!

>>44873471
Nerdy apophis with glasses and big tits in a wife beater and hoodie in a dark room looking at a computer monitor. What is she doing? shitposting? watching anime? vidya? We the viewer may never know

>>44874249
>Would you like to impregnate me with strong children?
Not gonna lie anons this line would probably drop me anons no matter what kind of monstergirl it was

>>44875529
doing this but all over hagville

>>44875665
what?

>>44875735
your lizard brain is in tune with her lizard brain
she's fertile and equipped with wide hips for easy childbirth

Remember sallies are perfect teachers for learning how to fight

>>44874852
I had a dream about having to wrangle a bunch of salamanders that tried to turn everything into a competition. It wasn't even sexual in any way it was just annoying. I can't remember the specifics but I remember one thing was a single walk down a block turning into an event because they found something new to compete over every few feet. Salamanders are okay but not that high on my list so it was strange

>>44875803
centipede girl doesn't get a lot of love.

>>44875632
>kissing vampires
i'd love to

>>44875780
>>44875767
I'm gonna challenge a Salamander to a "leave me alone" challenge! If she can leave me alone or the rest of my life she gets a lot of money!

>>44875780
>salamander challenges you to a staring contest
>her eyes start to waver downwards when she hears you unzipping
>undeterred, she starts unbuttoning her blouse
a test of wills, then

>>44875864
>Anon keeps looking at her as rips his shirt off
>They both undress into their undies
>Cut to them fucking with neither of them blinking
>even while cumming
>the poor cupid watching in horror

>>44875189
Best I can get you a rata. Sorry.

>>44875834
I think I enjoy the idea of being food to a vampire as much as anything else, if not more.

>>44875908
>the poor cupid watching in horror
I dunno why she'd be horrified--they're married now, aren't they?

>>44875948
they are silently fucking each other, neither not looking away and both are looking at each other even after, not speaking
u understand? she won but at what cost

>>44875938
ms slime can do it too

>>44875964
>slime
nah

>>44875964
>x ray vision of me cumming into her
I'm not sure how fun this would be.

>>44875836
>>44875864
They were challenging each other. It was as simple as doing a contest to see who could do the most pull ups when walking past a street lamp

>>44874845
Imagine finding out that your human wife was actually a t-1000 all along.

>>44875977
I love this vampire's design but I found Monogatari so boring I couldn't get past the first episode

I'll be honest, I need way more practice when It comes to stuff like two people and cuddling and in the long end that sleepy mouse is the best I could do, sorry dudes

>>44876041
Practice makes perfect, get to it

>>44875780
Sounds exhausting. Do you ever wake up exhausted after a dream about something exhausting?

>>44876041
i think it looks pretty good. if you want to practice direct contact cuddles maybe start with monster + dakimakura

>>44876041
We're all gonna make it.

>>44876041
its good, but studies will help alot if ou feel unconfident in your art

>>44876052
dreaming about work sucks real bad

>>44876060
not u tho. shit looks worse then before, ou need more fundies, faggot

>>44876078
post your work

>>44874549
>that milking machine
I think I know what happened there, few days earlier:
>manticore breaks into anon's farm and ravages his prized turnips
>"accidentally" trips on her own tail when trying to run and falls
>"well I'll be damned girl, you'll have to pay off those damages!"
few days later
>"good morning Saddie, how are you doing?"
>"you said you are what? the feared manticore, the Cat Bat maneater hybrid?"
>"as far as I'm concerned, you are just a dairy cow with an onahole attachment! now moo for me"
>"m-moooo <3"
>"that's my girl! now speaking of onaholes, I haven't blown my load for 30 minutes and my balls are feeling as heavy as the manure bags I had to fetch this morning"
>"now be a good girl and open it up..."
>"and hope you don't mind if I crank up this machine to max suction, we got a double order for your milk, my little manticow"
>[happy manticow noises]

>>44875963
>but at what cost
at the cost of dry eyes, at least. they'll need eye drops for a while

>>44876076
I'm sometimes able to make work dreams semilucid, which usually ends in a comfier dream.

>>44875986
>>x ray vision of me cumming into her
Imagine monster porn having slime stunt doubles so they can fake the xray cumshot scene.

>>44876163
they do make good stunt doubles for action scenes too

I need a warm Shog to keep me comfy on cool nights

>>44875276
We’re Hop

And then... A SKELETON POPPED OUT! WAHAHAHA!

>>44876492
Jokes like that can kill... but she's already dead YOHOHOHOHOOO

>>44876515
Get out of here Brook

>>44876084
Okay

>>44876552
Why are you wasting your talent indulging a schizophrenic shitposter.

>>44872722
>tell dragon vampire she can enter your house if she lets you ride her like one of those dragon knights
>"that's degrading and disgraceful... but okay"

>>44876552
I dunno who you are but I'm still gonna keep drawing.
I will even get some shading practice in as I try give cait sith a green jersey when we win the world cup.

>>44876565

>>44876565
Why are you wasting your time responding to furries? R&I

Did the thread just hit infinite recursion?

>the rival is a child

Ancient evils are dorks.

what mamono is good at dota to play with me

>>44876824
4x weak to mating press

>>44876854
and a multiplicative 4x stacking bonus to anal

>>44876163
>ZOOM IN ON THE ZYGOTE

>>44876885
maybe you could do some forced perspective with a slime core

>>44876835
She looks like she has four arms.

>Accept drink from oni
>Custom now states you must have sloppy drunk sex with her and get married

>>44876941
Whenever someone posts a comic gaira cover I just have a giggle.

>>44876941
I like oni but I'm sober. Tough life.

imagine if you will, having a cute creepy zombie loli maid
she can speak but very simply and creepily
she isn't the best maid and is rather clumsy, but she tries her best

>>44877115

>>44877127

Smelly house or room in MGE?
Literally just steal some dormice. Put one or two in a room, and boom, it smells like a sweet molasses.

Why waste money on scented candles, scentsy, or incense?

>>44877172
Nothing beats coming back to your home after a hard days working to smell dinner cooking.
This is what my wife will experience, I am a househusband.

>>44877183
Personally, I like the idea of being a p'orcer chieftain. No working, just being served by cute pigs

>>44876854
Is exploiting weaknesses necessary when she isn't very strong to begin with?

Fox in a box.

>>44877263
>Fox in a box.
with cox

>>44877016
>Oni feels sad about you choosing sober
>But respects your decision
>Drinks enough for both of you
>It is now your responsibility to princess carry her into bed and have sex with her while she is drunk

Could anybody link me to the post about the writing contest? I think I want to try my hand at writing something.

>>44877245
big damage numbers feel good

>>44873276
I now wish the hug the yan vampire and tell her it's okay.

any monster girls with creepy faces? i need them for my collection of creepy monster girls

>>44877245
Overkill damage contributes to mindbreak buildup. This causes lizards, sallys, and dragons to get mere'd faster.

Do not marry foxes. Foxes only want one thing and they don't care what you think about it.

>>44877452
Well, at least it's not gambling or brapposting on 4mon.

>>44877452
I WILL be forcibly (consensually) married to the foxes. I WILL bring many divine fox children into the world. I WILL support my wife as she overthrows corrupt governments and brings misfortune to evildoers. I WILL have a Youkou and Inari wife. I WILL give them nine tails each over time.

>>44877452
Instructions unclear. Impregnated a fox.

>>44877490
>Ancient evil fox wife is convinced to become a minor goddess because it's less work to just sit around and get fed offerings and be pregnant
>All she has to do for this worship is bless some farms which is trivial compared to raising armys and causing destruction
>Doesn't have to worry about priests and monks attacking her anymore

>>44877386
They're more fun non-mered, fucking a defeated Salamander loli after she's seriously tried to win feels better.

>>44877517
It really is the better path. Also source my good sir?

>>44877565
Search Batta, Gedou, it's in the Towako books. Be warned it's fairly dark in it's story and not MGE compatable.

>>44877565
Artstyle looks like batta. He made some fox doujin and has a running manga about the married life of some guy and a fox.

Dick the gob.

>>44877517
>It becomes a ritual that to keep her ever growing family from becoming new evils, a village boy is sacrificed to each daughter when they come of age.
>You are chosen as the sacrifice this year and there's a lot more celebration and ceremony this time around.
>Dancing in the streets, drums, stalls an entire festival.
>You weren't aware this many people would be happy to see you vanish in to the Fox Manor forever.
>Get to your destination clad in the ceremonial robes but for some reason the Fox Goddess has you drink manticore venom directly, which isn't usually part of the ritual.
>Shakily walk forward towards the door of the ritual chamber and open it to see your new wife.
>As the door opens, remember that only one festival can occur on a given day so in the event that multiple children are born on the same day they have to share a sacrifice.
>Realize as you stare at the mass of tails and lewd flesh on the bed that the festival wasn't for you leaving.
>It was for the Goddess successfully giving birth to nonuplets.
>You only get a moment to scream before their tails lunge out, wrap around you and drag you in for the gangrape.

disregard fox
acquire wolf

acquire wolf hags

>Vampire makes en elaborate plan on how to make anon accidentally invite her into his house
>Knock on the door
>He just lets her in
>She just stands there, both confused and offended that she didn't get to enact her masterplan

Monster girls, with hats on.

>>44877734

>>44877692

>>44877710
no

>>44877770
How cruel...

>>44877780
My heart is for Rudy, a young wolf looking for love.
And meat.

>>44877710
But I want a teen wolf.

Molest elves.

>>44877863
>molesting tall monsters
it's hard work but someone has to do it

Get yourself a dog that loves wieners

>>44877892
That is a very smug fox.

Kill yourself, gachanigger.

>failed my test completely
>expect lich teacher to give me the coldest "I am disappointed" look or to scold me harshly
>brace myself for the worst
>instead she looks unusually cheerful

>>44877938
>lich teacher gets excited at the prospect of 1 on 1 teaching with anon
>gets pissed when anon asks the top student anubis for help studying instead
>gets even more pissed when the anubis looks at her with a smug face like she knows what she is doing

>>44877971
FAT tails

Alien girls.

>>44878011
Deserve the flammethrower.

feed monsters, they will not follow you home so go crazy

>>44878047
>feed monsters
But only appul

Mermaids.

>>44878047
She's already a lot heavier than him and I'd imagine the humanlike portion of a Soldier Beetle will be bigger than the equivalent parts of a man on account of insect species having bigger females.

>>44877998

>>44877863
Only if ALICE is an elf!

How hard would it be to get a harem of cow succubi

>>44878052
balloon?

>>44877938
>tfw she will teach ou the material and fuck the knowledge into you

>>44878047
Directions unclear, ended up eating out ALICE for an hour and now she followed me home and won't stop cuddling me. 10/10, would ALICE again.

>>44878129
Maybe try giving them strawberries!

>>44878226
Meant to quote >>44878106

what if more than the daily recommended dose of ALICE and what about choco alice and vanilla alice as well?

>>44878250
The recommended daily dose of ALICE is yes, all of the ALICE. Be careful with multiple ALICE, though. You know the saying, more than one ALICE will ruin your palace. But if you don't have a palace, it should be fine! Make sure you love all of your ALICEs equally and in alphabetical order. Use love quadrants if you have to! If you have a full-ALICE harem, a Cheshire is recommended to help manage the ALICEs.

>>44878264
what about a wock who likes ALICE as much as me?

>>44878286
That works, too! I just recommended a Cheshire as, eventually, every husband of an ALICE will one day follow one through Wonderland, and that journey will likely lead to bonding anyways! Plus, don't the best tour guides convince their guests to pick up souvenirs? But yes, with ALICE blessing your vorpal sword, you shall lay the Jabberwock!

>>44878312
i guess i can take a cheshire, my momster told me the are the worst and to only trust clown monsters only

>>44878320
I'm afraid I'm no expert on clowns. Jokers, sure, but not clowns.

>>44878047
buy lunch for a hungry monster classmate once, and you'll get handmade lunches packed with love for the rest of your life.

>>44878350
arent the same? both looking to make you laugh?

>>44878125
not too bad. they tend to form herds

Yeti season approaches

>>44878368
I will not mate with yetis

>>44878383
>...and 99 more hilarious Winterstown jokes!

is there anything a Automaton wouldnt do for their master?

>>44878383
t. man trapped in Yeti's cabin

>>44878438
divde by zero

>>44878438

>>44878438
They would never
uhhh
allow him to be mauled by the rabid and aggressive wildlife

>>44878438
>Automaton’s young master wants to pet a fox
>Ends up finding unsealing an ancient evil fox to fulfill the request

>>44878361
Ah, but a Clown aims to make you laugh at her, while a Joker aims to make you laugh at the world. Many Clowns are born, but few Jokers are dealt.

>>44878518
but cant a clown do the latter as well? also what if ALICE in clown form

>>44878531
wonder what genie milk tastes like

>>44878312
Chesh and Wock got very upset when I called them Tweedledum and Tweedlefat.

>>44878524
Well, sure, either can do both, and both can do either - it's just a difference in focus. And while my research on ALICE is quite extensive, my knowledge of Clown ALICEs is admittedly lacking.

>>44878545
Magically delicious

which monster makes for the comfiest chair?

>>44878603
barometz

>>44878567
they are quite special, and funny

>>44878612
not enough back support

Would your waifu get into your autistic hobbies for you?
>honey please, Rome fell along time ago you don't have to larp it
>and why must this Carthage needs to be destroyed?

>>44878603
shoggoth

>>44878632
Rome was a mistake. Embrace your true roots and return to the Akkadian Empire.

El Goblina

I dunno why I did this.
Chesh if she real.

>>44878680
>history/mythology nerd succubus
>asks to roleplay as Lil-itu and Marsuk

>>44878680
Darn barbarian succ needs civilization correction...

>>44878742
My, Grandma, what big ears you have!

>>44878745
>history/mythology nerd lich
>asks you to roleplay Inanna's Descent (You are Inanna, she is Dimmuzi.)

how am i supposed to deal with swarm battles?

>>44878848
get good

>>44878827
>history/mythology nerd golem
>asks you to roleplay the siege of Jerusalem (she's Jerusalem)

>>44878848
You need to learn at least one AoE spell. I recommend the one that opens a portal to the tentacle dimension. It still counts as melee damage, you see.

>>44878900
spell? do i look like some kind of nerd to you?

>>44878848
>noooo Mr knight you can't leave yet, you haven't even met our bug sister yet!
>please little ones, I am on a urgent quest to hunt down monsters in this region

>>44878906
Get a polearm and learn sweeping maneuvers.

>>44878914
ms kiki taught me all she knows

>>44878940
>ms kiki taught me all she knows
gun?

>>44878886
>history/mythology nerd dragon
>asks you to roleplay St. George slaying the dragon (George doesn't stand a chance)

>>44878957
one version I heard he converts the dragon to vegetarianism

>>44878972
>no more burg only veggy burg

>>44878495
>Automaton's young master ends up with an harem of onee-sans and hags because her first reaction to any request is to bring him a vaguely relevant monstergirl

>>44878977
is the ultimate weapon against wans?

>>44878997
ah my spicy bean burgers are safe

I will not be defeated by wans
I will use the secret burger technique to turn them into burgerwans
Now they are too fat to defeat me

>>44878990
>Asks for a slime girl
>Gets a shoggoth that is ancient even by their standards.
>She is simply referred to as “Primordial Ooze”
>The master just calls her polly

>>44878742
It's disturbing, maybe portal shouldn't happen after all

>>44878990
>has krakens, alarunes, and even a dragon
>>44879046
Anon they are not dumb, they will just pounce on you when your asleep and you will be raped by an old fat hairy wan

>>44879046
>feed wans burgers
>they like them
>now they want to keep you so they can have more burger
dont think you thought this through anon

>ground control to major wan

>>44879046
she's become too powerful

Imagine a pear-shaped JS Demon wearing slutty lingerie in edgy black-red colors under her school uniform

>>44878632
>Please babe stop saying dumbass things you’re not Slave Knight Gael
>Hand it over, that thing. Your Bark Soul.

>>44879148
I'd like this, but JC.

i suffer in mgc

>>44879183
>order pizza
>beeg monster shows up with your pizza half eaten
>tell her you rather starve then eat it
>she gets flustered and hand feeds you pizza

>>44879183
seems like your winning to me anon

>>44879183
Now I'm hungry for pizza, need succ pizza delivery give me pesto chicken pizza

>>44879183
it takes a while to adjust

>>44879163
>this, but JC
A bit on the old side but still good

>>44879240
i think our orders got mixed up. i ordered a content, purring cheshire

>>44879087
Oh no, not the hagwan...

>>44879084
It'll be fine.

>>44879266
I dunno about these jks and jcs but there is no better feeling in the world than some smug loli brat pinning you down, raping you senseless, and calling you worthless old trash that will never be a wizard

>>44879269
This version of "I'm sorry Jon" hits different.

>>44879362
You expecting hundreds of teeth, tentacles, or for her to make a portal, separate his head from his body, and shove it under her ass and use it as a cushion?

>>44879266
Don't get me wrong, JS are nice too (as are JKs), but JCs hit the sweet spot for me. Mamono who are perpetually right after the start of puberty are what I want.
>Budding breasts
>Gentle hip curves
>Disproportionate nipples
>Slight pubes on a puffy loli cunny
Nothing better.

>>44878680
source?

>>44878680
This artist is great.

>>44879455
Good luck sleeping with all the catastrophically horny monstergirls who would have broken in anyway pounding on the window begging for dick.

>>44879455
>succs keep slapping their boobs against the glass
>don't get sleep from the slapping and cat calls
>fall prey to them anyway as they ambush you in the morning while your exhausted

>>44879476
You go outside?

>>44879425
Zankuro
>>44879377
Maybe. Eldritch Insanity Cat doesn't sound that bad.

>>44872448
秋だ

can you still call them a brat if theyre bigger then you?