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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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44769398 No.44769398 [Reply] [Original]

Been a while since we had one of these (unless I missed one), how are all of you doing?

>> No.44769414
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44769414

>> No.44769431

>>44769414
This but replace Chiyari with OP

>> No.44769432

>>44769398
I haven't been thinking about moving to Gensokyo as much lately, so I'd say I'm doing pretty good.

>> No.44769487

>>44769398
i have been feeling pretty down lately, i feel stuck in life. do vent threads really belong on /jp/?

>> No.44769523

>>44769432
Sadly can't say the same for myself. It's been really bad lately. If I wasn't such a coward I would've done it days ago. Actually, I would've done it years ago; I was just in a temporary "good" period lately. I thought I finally had found a stable footing, I've been enjoying good, productive hobbies consistently for a couple of months and nurturing many great friendships, but it doesn't even matter. It all feels like nothing. I even ended up impulsively killing most of those friendships in the last few days. At this rate I'll probably get rid of all of them and just go back to waiting all day.

>> No.44769530
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44769530

>>44769487
Alice is a licensed therapist and she's here to help you!

>> No.44769542
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44769542

My downie sister crossed the sanzu a few days ago. I moved away 2 months ago for a job in another city. I'm home now but leaving soon and I don't know how I can leave my parents alone. Everything feels so fucked since the lockdown. I just don't feel anything about anything anymore.

>> No.44769547

>>44769398
I am not even 30 but reading stuff where characters are 10 years younger than me makes me feel really empty inside. I still feel like a middle schooler who is yet to experience an interesting high school life

>> No.44769565
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44769565

>>44769530
I don't believe you, last time i visited her she insisted I take off my pants so she can gauge my mental health better. Besides you can't spell therapist without rapist

>> No.44769581
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44769581

>>44769547
A few years ago it occured to me that I am now many years older than the anime protagonists I used to watch as a kid. They felt so much older than me back then, now anyone their age is just a pesky kid

>> No.44770389

>>44769398
life is bearable

>> No.44770784
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44770784

Life is pretty good, got a new baby who's super adorable and my oldest kid entered kindergarten a couple weeks ago. I did almost die from the worst food poisoning of my life though, from eating deli supermarket chicken. I was going to go to the ER today if I kept throwing up water, but I was finally able to keep it down this morning. I lost 10 pounds, didn't eat for three days, and my milk almost dried up because my body was so fucked, but thankfully my boobs did their best and I'm still making milk for the little one. Excited to get back to drawing once I'm 100% again. Going to try eating toast later... Hopefully I don't throw it up.

>> No.44770891

>>44769398
Alice nooooo!

>> No.44770903
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44770903

>>44770784
You the one with the bootleg Tsukasa fumo?

>> No.44770916
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44770916

>>44769542
My deepest condolences, Anon. I don't think I could handle something like that in my life without me ending up going along.

>> No.44770944

>>44769398
Reaping the rewards of a lifetime of negligence, hoping I'd be dead by the next year.
Body falling apart, teeth falling out, uneducated, dumb, fortune squandered, and no one wants to deal with a mental teenager in his 30's.

>> No.44770983
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44770983

>>44769398
I started lifting more and doing more cardio, it's fun and keeps my mind away from the more pressing matters in life that is untill I jump into the shower and start thinking about things to deep

>> No.44770990
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44770990

>>44770903

>> No.44771005
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44771005

Life is mostly tolerable aside from when you're in bed, alone with your own thoughts, trying to fall sleep.

>> No.44771261

i want to kill myself

>> No.44771316

My imaginary friend told me she's a witch now and that she has real magic powers.

>> No.44771344
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44771344

Objectively speaking my life is shit, I just turned 25, I'm still not done with my Bachelors degree and I'm 20k in debt earning minimum wage. But I found a girlfriend like 4 months ago and I'm going to propose to her on her birthday which is going to be in one month.

>> No.44771371
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44771371

>>44771344
>I found a girlfriend like 4 months ago
>I'm going to propose to her on her birthday which is going to be in one month.
Pump the breaks bro!

>> No.44771398

>>44771371
I'm gonna let it rip. We've been talking about it from time to time anyway so she's just waiting for me say it. I think I would have waited just a little bit longer to propose but fuck it, let the dice roll.

>> No.44771412
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44771412

>>44769398
It's been decent this past year, as in I'm not constantly wanting to shoot myself. I was only keeping back for the sake of my granny and the small tinge of hope I have for getting out of the neet rut I'm in.
Funny enough it was on Christmas I received a very nice Christmas card that snapped me out of my depression and allowed me to look forward again for the first time in a long while.
The effects of that magical Christmas card are waning and as of earlier this week I'm slipping again despite learning to soldier, helping my sister with her renpy project, making my own TTRPG and actively testing it enough to get it into a 2.0 state rule wise. Even farming (you)s through the various fanfics I've been working on and using as a way to harness my creativity.
I know how to escape this rut, I've done it before after all. It's as easy as putting on shoes and walking 150 miles to the nearest city and start making money. Still the horror of it all just surrounds me and I can't help but not see a future as I actively keep sabatoging myself because hindsight only occurs after you commit yourself.
If my granny died I'd probably go to Gensokyo, not from the sadness of losing her. I would be sad don't get me wrong, but the rest of my family has their futures and I don't need to be there for them. They can handle just fine with or wirhout me.
>>44769547
For me it was when I was in high-school reading LNs. I started realizing that all the characters I loved were a few years older, than I reached their ages, then I exceeded them. I can still enjoy their stories sometimes, but the last time I watched a high-school romcom was nagatoro back when it was still new and I dropped it after awhile once their relationship became more classic tsun. Not because I didn't like it, on the contrary I still enjoyed it plenty but much like vanilla romance and 18+ doujins I just can't help but feel this vast empty void. I missed all my chances for such things in life by being myself and not realizing when those opportunities happened. Now it's just an empty future ahead of me endless disappointment as I know that all romance avaliable to a man of my age is soulless and disgusting materialistic romance.

>> No.44771458

>>44771398
If I have two words of advice, it's this; PRENUPTUAL AGREEMENT.
Even if you think it's a sure thing, and you trust her, people can change with time, quite drastically in some cases.
You can pretty much get her to forfeit her right to half your stuff if you get her to sign the right documents, which might come in handy should the worst come to the worst.

Or don't, if you're here you might not have enough for a court to force you to give it to anyone, but know about them and what they do before writing them off.

>> No.44771488

>>44771458
My nigga, I'm 20k in debt earning minimum wage and she doesn't care. If anything she ought to get a prenup.

>> No.44771502
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44771502

>>44769398
Not well if I'm being honest...
I feel like my life these past three years has gone from "I'm depressed" to "I'm hopelessly miserable and in pain".
I don't really know how much longer I can do this, I was satisfied in my life before, even if I wasn't happy I was satisfied I could do things that I wanted and reach for something in hopes that I could be something maybe someday.
But now it has all just come crumbling down, I'm in complete agony every moment of my waking life everyday I have a migraine that never goes away, my vision is all fucked up from it, I can't concentrate, the pain and pressure is unbearable.
Looking outside during the day it feels like my eyes are set on fire.
My memory is fucked, I slur my speech, I can barely have a coherent thought.
My lungs hurt, my heart hurts, my head hurts, I get phantom pains for no reason.
I get constant panic attacks for no reason to the point I haven't been able to leave my apartment for longer than ten minutes at a time for the these past few years.
No doctor has been able to help me and every doctor I bring any of my topics to say it's just anxiety and tell me to take a cocktail of SSRIs and antipsychotics.
I don't want to live a life like that but I don't want to live a life like this.
I can't make anything of myself no matter how hard I try, I can't work because of the way I am now and I can't do anything because I can't work.
I cut ties to all my friends and family because I felt too hurt talking to them.
Everything feels hopeless but I keep hanging in there hoping someday it all just goes back to the way it was three years ago.
I just want to be normal again.

>> No.44771582

>>44771458
Half of his stuff? What stuff? Anon doesn't have a house, he just said he's a poor student. He might drive a beater car. There will literally be nothing to take except child support if they have a kid, which will be a paltry sum if he's making minimum wage because it's based on your job at the time of the divorce.

>> No.44771723
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44771723

>>44771412
>I just can't help but feel this vast empty void. I missed all my chances for such things in life by being myself and not realizing when those opportunities happened.
Keep in mind that fictional idealizations are just that - idealizations. Non-failed adolescent romance isn't possible in modernity that disfavors stability, and adolescents typically don't get to stand on their own two feet independently financially and psychologically, especially in this era, where people are egged on to search for the best career and life opportunities (simply for a livable wage through non-soul-crushing means) outside of where they've grown.

>>44771344
>But I found a girlfriend like 4 months ago and I'm going to propose to her on her birthday which is going to be in one month.
Keep in mind that this is rushing things a bit (with pushy "birthday-derailing" egocentrism involved - intuitively that's rather off-putting) - a good chunk of marriages fail because the spouses never got to know and adjust to each other in conditions of living under the same roof alone beforehand.


I've never been even to a single proper date, however, this is all truth.

>> No.44771775

>>44771723
>a good chunk of marriages fail because the spouses never got to know and adjust to each other in conditions of living under the same roof alone beforehand.
Actually, it's the other way around. Marriages where the couple starts to live together after marriage tend to last

>> No.44771852

>>44771775
You're right.
https://ifstudies.org/reports/whats-the-plan-cohabitation/2023/executive-summary
I got a brainslip moment and equated engagement to marriage in my head.

>>44769398
Today, I was a bit retarded. It wasn't too bad.

>> No.44771914
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44771914

>>44771723
>Non-failed adolescent romance isn't possible in modernity that disfavors stability
I would agree with your point except I've seen it work. I've had friends that had a happy relationship in their teenage years and some that lasted past it. The void isn't just because of a longing for fictional romance, but because I missed the chance to have a romance unclouded by the materialism of our reality. All I have too look forward to at just 27 is a materlistic romance with a women that as world weary as I am and more materlistic than iron. Thats before I get into the reality of the situation that by this point all high quality women, personality wise, have been scooped up out of highschool/college by better men. I don't see myself enjoying romance anymore beyond the physical side of things.

Also your second point is spot on, I may beat myself up for neeting too long and not progressing my life but I know that all I have to look forward to is soul crushing labor that will leave me drained constantly outside of my days off like it used to be when I worked shit jobs.
I just can't see anything to look forward aside from empty materialism. Even the religion I grew up in can barely provide the comfort I need, all my rewards would be after I die after all so that leaves me with at least another 30-50 years of this to go.
I'm just stuck in a maze of reality and no matter which way I go there's nothing that lay forward which isn't monotonous and empty. Maybe things will get better once I die, but theres no way to know that till I get there and by most accounts you can't just cheat by ending yourself.

>> No.44772036

>>44769398
I'm working 12 hour shifts at the factory just to get by. Edging closer to the 996 life. Not feeling great. Just too tired to function.

>> No.44772051

>>44770784
>>44771344
What's your guys' secret to actually meeting people if you're a NEET? Do your partners also have otaku interests? It feels impossible to find people with similar interests and stuff, and it's even worse for me since I have a health condition that prevents me from driving.

Not having a way to drive around and go to places is completely crippling as far as meeting people goes. Makes me feel a little melancholy since having a lovey-dovey relationship seems so far out of reach and I'm starting to get older.

>> No.44772084

>>44772051
Not those guys but I found my exes online via talking about mutual hobbies. Fanfiction particularly, lots of women hang out in those spaces (think last AO3 census revealed ~5% of the userbase was male), and they definitely had those kinds of interests (got my ear talked off about Naruto by one). Not a NEET anymore but it worked for me while I was. Bear in mind if you're not a burger it'll be way harder.

>> No.44772107
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44772107

If you need an idea for some quality father-son bonding time then I recommend changing his catheter in the middle of the night while you're both having a panic attack and getting drenched in a tidal wave of urine.
I guess this is his payback for wiping my ass as a baby.

>> No.44772134

>>44772107
That's the thing they don't tell you about parents. They go from wiping your ass to you wiping theirs.

>> No.44772145

>>44769398
Breddy good. I keep getting /fit/ter, keep learning japanese, and keep appreciating tomboys. Life is good bros.

>> No.44772155
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44772155

>>44772107
I don't want to think about my parents getting older man why can't they just stay the same age since I was born

>> No.44772163

>>44772155
Someday, it'll be the last time you ever see them.

>> No.44772258
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44772258

>>44772051
Well... I actually married a /jp/sie; we were on and off internet friends for over a decade. I always liked him and had a crush on him, even before I knew what he looked like. We met through /a/ actually, it was my home board and he frequented it. There were a lot of ups and downs in our (internet) relationship, but when we started talking again as older adults, it just made sense to meet up and see what happens. So I flew down to go see him, and the rest is history. He loves Touhou and this is his home board, which is actually why I started getting into it. Of course, back in the day, I knew about the famous 2hu memes and the girls, but I was never really into it when I was younger in its hayday. It's kind of fun discovering 20+ years of Touhou art and videos and games to explore, it's rare to find new hobbies at my age. With that said, you can't really force stuff like this. Every single relationship I've had started online, and I usually met my exes through 4chan, Facebook, or other places like that. I couldn't even imagine attempting to date in a normie fashion, like IRL dates or disgusting dating apps. The thought of it legit makes me cringe. My advice is to just be socialable online in your interest circles and keep an open mind, and eventually you may run into the love of your life!

>> No.44772310

>>44772258
Wait, so you're female?

>> No.44772319
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44772319

>>44772258
Don't give me hope femanon, or I might never come out of my autism hole.

>> No.44772326

>>44772258
If I meet a chick on a Touhou forum there ain't no way I'm trusting that, she's probably a bishit, and I'm a bishit so I know exactly what bisexual "people" are like.

>> No.44772344

>>44772326
You sound self hating.

>> No.44772347

>>44772319
I'll just say right now that I was diagnosed with Asperger's three years ago. I always suspected I was autistic since high school, but being a female, no one would take my concerns seriously until recently. Went through all the rigorous testing and was finally told what I already know; my doc told me that autism is actually split 50/50 between the genders, it's just that girls are disproportionately misdiagnosed because it presents differently in females than males. So yeah, you should have hope, because there's plenty of spergy girls running around out there!

>> No.44772348

>>44772319
>>44772326
You could also be in a relationship with a male but it's understandable why people wouldn't like that idea

>> No.44772369

>>44772258
Thanks for your honest reply anon. It's kind of hard to believe such happy coincidences can happen, but that gives me a little hope that maybe an autistic cripple like me can find someone too.

I'd considered dating sites and stuff but those kinds of relationships seemed super shallow at best and just plain forced hookups at worst. I'll keep your advice in mind, it'd be nice to have someone I could make happy.

>> No.44772406
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44772406

>>44769398
I am destined to die alone, but I strongly feel that I have made peace with it. I think I will just end up being some Henry Darger type, except with Touhou. I'm fine with that.
It's not that I don't like human company, far from it. But most people are truly alien to me. And with women it's a million times worse. It's like every time I talk to one they're some of the most empty people I have the misfortune of talking to. It's stupid, but I've long started implicitly assuming such from all of them, which of course just leads to me confirming my biases and making it worse over time. At this point I'm pretty much a misogynist.

>> No.44772444

>>44772406
>At this point I'm pretty much a misogynist.
Just remember there's a reason every functional human society across thousands of years put restrictions on the lives and behavior of women.

>> No.44772475

>>44772406
Seems to me that you're interacting with the wrong people. Plenty of men and women are vapid with nothing of worth going on in their brain, but why would you want to talk to these people? I'm genuinely curious, what kind of women are you talking to that make you feel this way?

>> No.44772624
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44772624

Ahhhh ite. Looking to finish the year off strong.

>> No.44772658
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44772658

I don't even think I have anything, aside from the required autism to like an obscure japanese shooter game. I'm just generically mentally unwell.
I had a fucked up early childhood, a fucked up elementary education, a fucked high school life, a fucked social life (I.E. None whatsoever), and my parents bestowed upon me such alluring traits as awful anger management, borderline(?) sociopathy and general misanthropy.
I don't think I've managed to keep up any real friendships longer than a couple years, and the majority of my interactions with people have always been negative. Somehow, against all logic, I have managed to be the guy under a godamn microscope for any failing whatsoever, including social (let me tell you that's not a thing you can fix by willpower), and by the end of my education I think I was a month away from losing it and strangling someone.
I actually started slicing into my thigh with a kitchen knife every day, because somehow the sight of blood and bit of pain it gave managed to ground me enough that I didn't want to hurt people for no reason for a while. Yeah, I'm an emo faggot, sissy whatever, I stopped as soon as I left school since I never had to see all the people I had come to hate ever again in my life. I jammed my thumb into the cuts during the HS graduation day because I was so utterly fucked in the head right then.
I got into touhou a little before that because I wanted something to distract myself from how much I hated myself and my life, and it was that or tearing open my jugular. It wasn't so much a coping mechanism than mind numbing entertainment really, but I consciously went in knowing I probably wouldn't come out the rabbithole.
At the end of all that, I've a short temper and massive attachment issues. I don't think I can form anything close to a healthy relationship even if it fell into my lap, because the second I feel any kind of affection my head goes all funny and I want to do weird things. Not necessarily violent or sex things, but just odd things.
I sort of cycle between a mild mania, periods of depression and the worst is probably when the slightest thing happens and I get irrationally angry about it.

Anyway, I'll probably end up alone from all of that, and I wouldn't blame anyone for it. I'd probably be disgusted at myself if I were someone else.
I somehow never developed any interest other than video games that I get bored of within a day and the endless content machine of touhou, which I can never admit to anyone because I'd be paralytic with the fear that people would be talking shit about me behind my back. So I can't even take any comfort in the knowledge that my life was fucked by poor genetics, it's just every other event and decision in it that ever happened to me.

Forgive the blogpost, but that's my full mental state that I'm willing to share. I kinda need to write it down, but I never kept a diary.
At the very least, if I do end up going to gensokyo there will be some guy on the internet who knows how much life has decided to fuck some other random over for no reason.
I don't really want to answer any questions pertaining to my psychology either, so please don't ask anything intrusive of me.
Especially pity. I wallow in my own misery enough as it is, without other people doing it as well.

>> No.44772826

I miss the neetdom

>> No.44772863

>>44772658
I want to fuck you while you cosplay as Parsee

>> No.44773020
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44773020

>>44769398
In burnout right now, but overall things are looking up. Finally getting insurance so I can start meds and hopefully become mentally stable enough to stop burning through my savings. Not looking forward to working; but hopefully by getting something seasonal I can still pay my bills and only have my soul crushed for 1/4 of the year.
>>44769547
Same here. I love cgdct moe school animanga but more as escapism. I wanted a big group of friends and dreamed of high school when I was young; and then when I actually got there was too depressed, anxious, and traumatized to get close to anyone. It heals the heart yet tears it apart at the same time. Just wish I could have went to a different school and been a different person.
>>44772051
The only way I got into my current relationship as a hikiNEET was that we met as roommates. Same with the 2 friends I have. Unless I am forced to socialize on a regular basis my shut-in tenancies destroy relationships after a couple of months.
He likes fps games and that's about the extent that he is online, but dating a normal has it's perks. I mostly talk about my interests on here; and am slowly getting him into more anime and learning his tastes. I play a couple fps with him too despite getting overwhelmed easily. Not expecting him to get into 2hu anytime soon, but he respects my interests and learned the names of my favorite characters.
In terms of finding partners with otaku interests; I'd say lower your expectations. Don't write off people exclusively because they only watched shounnenshit. It may make you cringe a bit, but if you can get a foothold on what they enjoy about their interests you can eventually convert them. If you are looking for a long term relationship, a bit at a time can eventually get them to be pulled in on their own accord.

>> No.44773088

>>44772051
>Makes me feel a little melancholy since having a lovey-dovey relationship seems so far out of reach and I'm starting to get older.
Believe me, from someone who fucked around getting gfs, you're much better off this way. I look back at my early 20s and wish I hadn't pissed those years away on bitches and deluding myself into thinking I found love, repeatedly. You're happier single than you ever would be taken, and if you don't hate women now: you will.

>> No.44773144

I got hired last week, so my NEETdom of 4 years has finally come to an end. Can't say I want to work, and I definitely hate having less time and needing to sleep according to a schedule, but at least the money is nice and the job interesting.
Aside from that, I really want to break away from my fapping addiction. Its something that has gone on for over a decade at this point and its crushing in every single way. I worry sometimes that the emptiness won't go away and I'll be too late to change, but its likely just worrying as usual.

>> No.44773151

>>44769398
parents were yelling at me to stop NEETing, i have two jobs now and they're still yelling at me

>> No.44773276

>>44772658
>I somehow never developed any interest other than video games that I get bored of within a day
Not trying to go armchair psychologist on you, but have you tried any other creative hobbies? Having a way to channel that escapism into something tangible is nice even if you don't end up showing it to anyone. It's at least something to works towards. Lord knows I've had my fair share of eat->game->sleep on repeat.

>> No.44773294

>>44773144
You should buy an onahole or sex doll and use that

>> No.44773439

>>44773020
Getting your partner into other hobbies is great, but getting them into addicting obsessions is not.

I would not want to force myself to repeat the touhou lore to my significant other as repetition of the past is something I personally want to avoid. Nostalgia is a drug and too much makes it hard to stay sober in my reality.

Interesting how 4chan is pretty chill about mental heatlh (i haven't seen many deranged psychos YET)

>> No.44773595
File: 2.99 MB, 2480x3508, 3ab9d31901ee8db5aaf48ac4ffe8f5465e3d23c16a997e7c503d4b795c2eb69f.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44773595

>>44773439
I get what you mean but that's not what's happening. I have a couple fumos; to him it's the same as learning stuffed animal names.
When we go somewhere I'll bring one with to take pictures of, normally choosing who would 'enjoy' it the most. He likes Marisa the best, he says that the others look 'bitchy'. When my shoulder dislocated and wouldn't go back; I brought Patche with me in to the x-ray for comfort (she's possibly a bit radiated now). During a camping/fishing trip Meiling enjoyed the outdoors. When sewing, admittedly I do use Alice as a pincushion (though I'm sure she understands the struggle). And his little sister really likes Aya and asks to play with her whenever she comes over.
>Interesting how 4chan is pretty chill about mental heatlh
I doubt there are many people with no vices & no mental challenges here, or in the real world for that matter. Though it is surprising that there aren't many trolls in these threads.

>> No.44779422

>>44773294
This is literally the worst advice to give someone with a masturbation addiction, stop that. I would say just slowly reduce the amount of times he does it. So if he faps three times a day, lower it to two-- two weeks later, lower it to one-- then two weeks later, try doing it once every other day. I say two weeks because apparently that's how long most people need to form a habit.

>> No.44779451

>>44773088
Mmm, well, we all waste our time one way or another. Would you feel any differently if you instead wasted time jacking off and playing games, just going through the motions? Either way, it's going to be wasted time. But I also agree with you on a personal level, I wasted so much of my fucking time on stupid ass men and relationships that I regret it really badly.

>> No.44779496

I can't relate to women. They have life so damn easy, so it pisses me off that there are women ITT who have the audacity to give advice to men as if they know shit.

>> No.44779499

>>44772863
I'm not vinum, I'm just using her as a reaction image.

>>44773276
I did a little writing, and a little drawing/coloring, but I'm not really a creative person. Probably comes from being told I had shit handwriting from as soon as I could, and a lack of interest in coloring as a kid also.
If I had the option to I'd buy a .223 and target shoot to blow off steam, but I live in a dogshit country where you can't go and do that even if you are mentally stable.
I can only really apply myself when I'm in that mania, and I can only stay in it for more than a few days by taking caffeine, so it's pretty rare I can get enough motivation to do anything.

>> No.44779908

>>44779499
>If I had the option to I'd buy a .223 and target shoot to blow off steam, but I live in a dogshit country where you can't go and do that even if you are mentally stable
Scotsanon, it's you, isn't it?

>> No.44779983
File: 103 KB, 677x639, 8551949_p3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44779983

>>44772475
I dunno, I've talked to a pretty decent selection in my opinion, but I can count the ones I've truly enjoyed a conversation with on a single hand.
Then again, it's all just self fulfilling prophecies on my end. Maybe I'm just blinding myself. I'm usually a complete slave to my own emotions.

>> No.44780048

>>44779908
Most of the (not 3rd) world is like that, apart from the US, Finland, and Switzerland. Some places I'm pretty sure don't care so long as you don't wave them around or kill anyone though.
Maybe.

>> No.44780196

>>44780048
Dang, well. Uhhhh, you said you don't want pity so I'll just say that I usually enjoy your posts a lot. I liked your writing and your colorations. I like when your gun autism casually leaks out. You make /jp/ more fun. I hope things get better for you, stay safe.
Just wanted to say that. Oh, and I'm also not even that one stalker guy that always called you gengetsuanon or whatever, I'm someone else.

>> No.44780267

I can't make friends because I rarely share similar interests with them. Does any anon here like to play Touhou Project games, listen to the music and read the manga?

>> No.44780287
File: 321 KB, 900x918, Javelina.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44780287

>>44780196
I sometimes wonder about that guy.
Really spooked me out that time. Don't hold anything against him though.
Really, I'm kinda fine. Ever since I left school I've been doing a lot better, but every once in a while I get either depressed or irritable, yesterday being one of those times.
I did most of that writing after having dropped out of a college course I was pressured into, which subsequently got me acting funny for the time up until I burnt myself out.
I'm a mess, but it's not quite as bad as I made out. I just have off days every few weeks.

>> No.44780365
File: 322 KB, 600x800, __kurumi_touhou_and_1_more_drawn_by_cop_shokkidana__9979fb7d2c3899d1cb94b4c277eaf718.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44780365

>>44780196
NTA, but I suppose you're talking about gengetsoo.jpg anon? I'm a fan of his posting style too, and I think he has at least one "stalker" on the jay.
>>44772658
I hope things take a turn for the better for you, gengetsoo.jpg anon. You are my favourite recognizable poster here. And I wouldn't be too worried about sharing your interest in Touhou with other IRL people, but then again, I'm about as unhinged as a typical LLS fan and don't care all that much whether people are talking about me behind my back or not. I won't ask you any intrusive questions regarding your psychology as that's what you wanted, nor do I have any worthwhile advice or insights to share on that topic (if I did, I would use it to uninsane myself), but I will say that having a healthy sleeping schedule can have a surprisingly positive effect on your mood.

>> No.44780393

>>44772258
>>44772319
another femanon here, i will only date male touhou fans because at this point the series is part of my dna, and i can't imagine not sharing my autistic hobby with a partner. have a fulfilling relationship that way currently.
that being said, it's not like just any dude within that category will do, you still have to be a decent person who takes care of themselves and is otherwise well-rounded and sociable, which is about as rare as finding a female touhou fan, so don't get your hopes up. if you're a shithead neet with no redeemable qualities, it's not like a shared interest is going to save that.

>> No.44780399
File: 268 KB, 540x500, 1682550477271106.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44780399

My one wish is to know what it feels like to have a friend. Why must it be that I'm turning 25 and never once had a friend?
I WISH I HAD ONE FRIEND. JUST ONE. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE JUST GIVE ME ONE FRIEND. I'M TOO SCARED TO ENTER CHURCHES, SO I'M UNABLE TO EVEN BEG TO JESUS FOR A FRIEND.

>> No.44780429
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44780429

>>44780287
>every once in a while I get either depressed or irritable, yesterday being one of those times.
It's been the same for me for the last few weeks, but now I feel better and I'm glad it's the same for you. Have a nice night!

>>44780365
Greetings, fellow /jp/sie stalker. ^_^

>> No.44780623
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44780623

>>44780393
I'm attending college for a master's degree in software engineering, live in an apartment with a close group of friends with similar interests, 5'10 with blue eyes and brown hair, never been in debt, exercise frequently and my favorite 2hu is Reisen. Can you marry me?

>> No.44780684

>>44780393
Post cosplay

>> No.44780777

Finishing plans to travel to Japan next summer, watch my favourite artist live and kill myself later that year.

>> No.44780857

>>44780777
Don't kill yourself

>> No.44780978

>>44780399
Why do you fear holy places?

>> No.44781134

>>44780978
When I was a teenager I strongly believed I was a monster. Since I never made friends, I never underwent character development to fully snap out of my chuunibyou delusions. I love Jesus and wish I was able to pray to him for friends but feel uncomfortable around holy symbols and places.

>> No.44781200

>>44780857
33 years is enough, no reason to grow old.

>> No.44781215

>>44781200
You have a favorite artist. That makes you superior to me.

>> No.44781322

wasted years of my prime being a neet and depressed
trying to finish my bachelors now at 31
barely living paycheck to paycheck
hate my family
BUT despite all those things i feel great
i learned a lot from all the shitty odd jobs i've done, i still stay in shape and i was recently offered an amazing internship opportunity that's going to change my life

although those depressed years were the worst period of my life overcoming it made me realize all the negative experience i have now are insignificant in comparison. it's weird but nothing gets me down anymore

don't give up. WAGMI

>> No.44781407

>>44781200
>>44781322
You guys are more than a decade older than me

>> No.44781447

I'm doing horny rn
Gonna masturbate to nude Aya's phat ass

>> No.44781455

>>44781407
which anon are you?

>> No.44781509

>>44769398
I'll be taking the JLPT N2 this december, then I'll try for N1 next year. If I manage to pass, I'll try to stop being a neet and get a job where I can use my japanese skills. If I can't find a job before turning into a wizard, I'll just commit suicide.

>> No.44781514

>>44781134
>When I was a teenager I strongly believed I was a monster.
Sounds kind of badass and I think you should keep that up. Don't worry about your friends, God loves them and will take care of them without your intervention.

>> No.44781539

>>44781200
Life is precious, which is precisely why only you can determine its true value. If you deem it unworthy of keeping then that is your decision and it should be respected. Maybe people will think you reasons are stupid but you know what, that's not their call to make either. If your reasons are important to you then that is what matters.

That said, I say give it till your 40's. You still have much youth left in you yet and you should exhaust that before ending it.

>> No.44781709

>>44781447
Done.

>> No.44781734

>>44781709
Post pics

>> No.44781762
File: 62 KB, 661x891, 44eed605f2b99b3f629afc1e1cc02849.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44781762

>>44780393
I meet all these requirements.
But you're probably halfway across the planet aren't you? Life can never be simple.

>> No.44781791
File: 1.43 MB, 1400x1400, 1695839002870424.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44781791

>>44780399
I'll be your friend.

>> No.44781793
File: 756 KB, 900x857, a2443937a3.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44781793

I have reach the end of my limit, I thoughts that I was going somewhere in life when starting a new job with future growth and was meeting new people but that is going nowhere now cause it got bought by another company and those people turned out to be shitting. I getting older with less opportunity and money, I am simply too weak to live in this world, planning on leaving this harsh world soon, just gonna prepare a few things before I am finally gone.

>> No.44781804
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44781804

>>44781509
Damn that shit is hard man, good luck.
I can barley remember more than like 30 kanji but I'll make it somehow

>> No.44781843
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44781843

>>44781793
Such suffering is the act of the random chaos that occures a shit world like ours.

I understand man. I don't really think there is much I can say here, I'm not the most hopeful person ever.

I hope you wake up in the hakurei shrine.

>> No.44781889
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44781889

Not terrible, but not the best either. I don't want to give up yet, however.

My main problem is that I've always been an outcast at heart, and admittedly a bit self-centered too. I don't have any issues socializing on the surface, and I could even pass for an outgoing guy sometimes. In fact, that's what I did until my mid-twenties, which even landed me some romantic experiences that still torment me to this day. But I just can't be bothered to keep up the act anymore. The mere thought of becoming closer to 'that kind of people' makes me anxious. I will be polite to those that I know aren't on my same wavelength, but that's about it. At least I can get my socialization fix online and out of my family. For now.

Professionally, I've alternated between work, education an NEETdom several times over the last 8 or so years. I am currently unemployed after my first experience of working remotely for an American company (I'm from the EU). I still don't know how they put up with my indifference, but hey, at least the pay was decent, and now I know that the 'yasss slay queen' kind of people actually exist out there. Sometimes, it takes an eye-opening experience to emphasize how fucked things really are.

I'm at a bit of an impasse right now, because I still have to finish my degree to work in the area that truly appeals to me, but my place isn't the best for studying and I don't have enough money to move out yet. Doing cardio at home helps me keep the more negative thoughts at bay, at least. I hope that I can find it in me to finally get things done and enjoy what makes me happy without this horrible pressure. It's exhausting.

>> No.44781897
File: 84 KB, 1391x864, 1695320995983671.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44781897

I've been reading this thread. And I realized that I want to be friends with fucking everyone here. Do you guys have discord or something?

>> No.44782001

I am 99% certain I had undiagnosed ADHD all my life but unfortunately it is likely to stay untreated due to both the diagnosis and the meds being too expensive without insure.

>> No.44782042

>>44781897
I think this is the first time someone said they wanted to be friends with me after they heard I wanted to kill myself.

>> No.44782044

>>44781734
This is a SFW board, DM me on discord, the name's Terrog btw.

>> No.44782056

>>44781897
Very cute, I honestly feel the same. I love jpsies!

>> No.44782072

>>44782044
You don't have to DM me. Just upload it onto catbox. I know you won't. You're too scared.

>> No.44782089

>>44781897
me too?

>> No.44782098

>>44782072
Okay fine: https://files.catbox.moe/506fwx.jpeg

>>44781897
I do
>>44782044

>> No.44782099
File: 188 KB, 480x640, help.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782099

>>44769398
My life's been in a strange position, I always lived in a pretty small rural area and now next year I will be moving alone to one of the biggest cities in the world in order to work and study.
The anxiety is killing me, I am not sure if I will adapt well, but I'm ready to be fucked.

>> No.44782328

>>44779496
Especially in a community like 2hu. There's probably a minimum one woman to every ten men, maybe more. They get their pick and most of us stay lonely. Then they don't even think about it so they just assume 'oh if I did it anyone can, right?'. Always has been that way.

>> No.44782378

>>44781200
could you send me some money before kys? I'm from ARG and very poor. pls send help.

>> No.44782401
File: 511 KB, 1087x1176, Flandre 106.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782401

>>44780399
oh! you are the guy who never had a friend i remember you.
i go to church and honestly you will only end up making friends with older people (the priest and a nice lady are the only one who say hi to me when i go every sunday) so if you are cool with that church is an option.

>> No.44782418

>>44782378
negro feo

>> No.44782429

>>44782401
I am not looking forwards to confessing my touhou porn addiction to the priest when I go back to church (I'm lapsed Catholic)

>> No.44782437

>>44782418
im white i promize

>> No.44782481
File: 43 KB, 771x604, tewi.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782481

You know those "Rabbit Rabbit" threads at the beginning of the month where you say the phrase for good luck? I did it for the first time years ago and landed my first job out of college, but quit later because of personal issues. Then after many dead end jobs applications and a financially rocky NEET life, I did it again and got a call from a recruiter saying my first employer wanted me back.
I never really believed in luck or a guiding entity before all this, but I just wanna say thanks for the job security Tewi.

>> No.44782623

>>44782429
you don't have to be that specific you can just say you watch porn

>> No.44782640

>>44781897
I don't feel comfortable giving my discord out to strangers

>> No.44782662
File: 2.94 MB, 3000x3550, 1670545496905653.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782662

>>44781897
ewww discord, just PM on my 4chan account and i will write back

>> No.44782705
File: 104 KB, 1250x1100, 1695798585032045.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782705

>>44782662
You can do that?

>> No.44782707

>>44782328
>There's probably a minimum one woman to every ten men
I feel like that's the case for every hobby I enjoy.

>> No.44782728

>>44782044
Numbers?

>> No.44782734

>>44779496
I don't know. As a man I think we fucking mog women in every way that matters and we always will. Like men as a whole needed to handicap themselves and tamper with the existing social system to even let them try to be number 2. If that's not a win I don't know what is.

>> No.44782741
File: 12 KB, 320x323, ranking-touhou-characters-based-on-of-much-rizz-they-have-v0-rj8oiua68afb1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782741

>>44772406
Literally me. You got any friends?

>> No.44782753

>>44782741
Where does Yama rank in that rizz list?

>> No.44782755
File: 68 KB, 175x188, RDT_20230926_2204015669825650893570528.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782755

>>44782734
This MF never heard of the legal system and society.

>> No.44782764
File: 34 KB, 442x517, RDT_20230924_2046528778867793027208409.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44782764

>>44782753
Number 1. Judicial Rizz.

"Have sex with me or you're going to hell lmao"

>> No.44782789

>>44781897
If this thread is still alive tomorrow I'll tell you.

>> No.44782803

>>44782764
She can't keep getting away with abusing her power like this!

>> No.44783067

>>44782728
They don't exist anymore, just type in my name.

>> No.44783451

failed normies thread

>> No.44783460

>>44782764
Is Eiki really allowed to abuse her authority like that?

>> No.44783597

I've been meaning to ask for quite some time, is there one fully mentally sound Touhou fan somewhere?

>> No.44783610

>>44783597
No.

>> No.44783629

>>44783597
Maybe.

>> No.44783645

>>44783597
Yes, but definitely not here.

>> No.44783695
File: 2.60 MB, 1200x1667, d70efbd7b6c11ed3dbc63389f23d48d4.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44783695

>>44769398
I want to kill myself every day. I'm over 30 and unemployed, I might end up in the streets. It feels like my life is heading to absolute disaster.

>> No.44783852
File: 163 KB, 850x1162, __patchouli_knowledge_touhou_drawn_by_falken_yutozin__sample-8e1f719c4dc1d42eb1250f98f1153287.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44783852

>>44783695
There seems to be many of you guys in this thread. I'm younger than you guys but I understand to be honest.

>> No.44783858
File: 115 KB, 850x1057, __toutetsu_yuuma_touhou_drawn_by_houzuki_hotondo__sample-a9471c61c2b8b50867ce44fdf841d05a.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44783858

>>44782089
Yes, you too.

>> No.44784370

>>44781897
I'm unwilling to use any website other than this one.

>> No.44784481

>>44784370
NTA but if you want friends you have to get out of your comfort zone at least a little

>> No.44784482

>>44781897
I stopped using Discord when it clamped down on its anonymity even more recently.

>> No.44784483

>>44784481
If I had the capacity to leave my comfort zone, I would have had friends by now.

>> No.44784513

>>44784483
I know you can do it anon

>> No.44784515

>>44784370
Discord friends aren't real friends

>> No.44784964

It's been five years since posting in these threads. Despite what I thought at the time, things got better.
The hurt didn't go away. But I can live with it now. A lot happened in those years and I shudder to think I nearly missed it all.
I feel stupid for having wanted to kill myself. Because I wouldn't have only taken my life, but also my future. And there's always a future.

>>44779499
I think I know you. Hope you're doing alright.

>> No.44785215

>>44771914
I don't have much to say other than that you sound like a nice person anon, I do wish you the best.
>>44772051
You probably won't believe me, but I met my husband here on 4chan, whilst we were both NEETs. His sister met her long term boyfriend here too. And my friend also met her boyfriend on 4chan... but he cheated on her, so that is one failure. I don't remember the percentage but a good amount of relationships start online now. I don't think I could have found anyone I'd even half enjoy being with if I just stuck to my immediate area. For you that is of course harder due to your struggles with driving, do you struggle with being on planes too? That's one thing. To make an LDR work you have to have money to meet. I am glad I met my husband whilst we were both NEETs, since both of us having all the free time in the world allowed us to really bond and spend time with one another.
>>44772258
I am so happy for you, and I wish your babies great health and happiness. I'm probably going to be like you in a couple years... so that'll make two mothers on /jp/ that let their babies hang out with their fumos. Which won't be a lot, but it'll be funny.

>> No.44785226

>>44785215
Is your friend still single?

>> No.44785294

>>44779451
>Would you feel any differently if you instead wasted time jacking off and playing games, just going through the motions?
I wish I'd spent that time honing my skills as an author. I've had to basically rediscover everything I lost in that age, because I wrote from about 8-19 when I abruptly stopped because chasing chicks ate up all my spare time.

>> No.44785326

>>44785215
I met my ex on 4chan. She's my ex because if you think LDRs are hard work, try being a NEET who has to travel internationally for a relationship. And by that I mean across the Pacific. Haven't exactly given up on LDRs yet, but I don't think I want one out of my country yet.

>> No.44785417

>>44785226
Yeah, but she's not over him, so, sorry. Maybe one day.
>>44785326
You're saying that as if I haven't done exactly that and succeeded. We are now married and living together. It's not hard work if you have money and genuinely love each other. Easier work than being with a boring normie.

>> No.44785446

>>44785417
>if you have money
When I mentioned being a NEET, did a single thought pass through your skull? A single flash of recognition? Understanding perhaps?

>> No.44785462
File: 132 KB, 1240x874, 1676689900516683.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44785462

>>44785446
If you think there's no such thing as a rich NEET, I think you're the one who evidently struggles with that

>> No.44785472

>>44785462
>rich NEET
Never met one who wasn't actually in some kind of self-employment they simply didn't define as employment, usually some kind of financial trading.

>> No.44785508

>>44785215
How the fuck do people meet on 4chan? Besides /soc/, which is filled attentionwhore e-girls and the most absolutely desperate guys. (Well, I did make a few friendships there but none of those lasted)

>> No.44785518

>>44785446
Women will post shit like that and then wonder why the entire planet and every major religion has imposed strict social restrictions on their sovereignty since the dawn of time in every place humans has ever lived.

>>44785508
I met mine on /r9k/, she identified as ftm at the time but these days she gets annoyed if I bring it up (I bring it up regularly for my own amusement)

>> No.44785551

>>44785472
I've met quite a few wealthy NEETs on /jp/ who don't fit that definition, not as rare as you'd think.
>>44785508
Enjoy a conversation with an anon and ask for their email/discord/whatever. Harder to do each year as genuine and sincere conversations seem to become rarer.

>> No.44785594

>>44785551
>Enjoy a conversation with an anon
I have never done that in my life.

>> No.44785700

>>44779496
>>44782734
>>44785518

you guys post shit like this and then when women are picking the other dudes you attribute it to either arcane wizard magic or rocket science instead of reflecting on who you are as a person.

>> No.44785729

I must admit that I've never encountered another human being who knows what Touhou is in my entire life. Do you people even exist? I can't tell.

>> No.44785730

>>44785700
I find a lot of men who hate women incredibly hard are usually gay. They don't have any actual consequences for saying what they really think about women because if women don't want to fuck them that's not a problem, and they usually get exposed to woman nonsense like every other man.

>> No.44785740

>>44785729
I accidentally stumbled on discovering my best friend of ~15 years now was a Touhou fan only one year ago because he let it slip that he liked it. He didn't talk about it much because Touhou fans are famously mentally unwell, even on the weeb corners of the internet. So maybe you know someone who does like Touhou but have never said it before.

>> No.44785783

>>44785740
I don't know anyone, except my parents.

>> No.44785811

>>44785700
Actually I'm like this after dating women, not before.

>> No.44785819

>>44785783
That might be the problem. I suggest talking to weeby people.

>> No.44785826

>>44785819
I don't speak the language where I live. Talking to people is impossible.

>> No.44786426

>>44785826
Learn it you idiot

>> No.44787091
File: 147 KB, 1325x1248, RDT_20230927_144048705985881120043255.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44787091

>>44782789
Hand it over bitch

>> No.44787124
File: 62 KB, 1080x1072, RDT_20230924_102910681740934705404794.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44787124

>>44785730
Yeah ok. These "Hitler killed Jews because he secretly wanted the be one" logic. No man, their just annoying.

>> No.44787325

>>44787124
>their just annoying

The only women you come in contact with are the teachers at the middle school you're currently attending, posting discord meme images on jp during class instead of paying attention is why you're still mixing up their there and they're.

>> No.44787372
File: 481 KB, 1415x1080, Screenshot_20230923-231521.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44787372

>>44787325
>Ad hominem
>Strawman
>False delimma

"Minor grammatical error, I win"
This nigga so retarded

>> No.44787400

>>44787372
He was so fucking right, holy shit. Ahahaha.

>> No.44787404

>>44787372
>debate buzzwords i learned from google and youtube
>spelling error
>two oopsie words for extra edge

ok

>> No.44787409
File: 148 KB, 500x500, 7892524.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44787409

>>44787372
Those who cannot use the quote function correctly shall cast no stones.
And we say nigger with a hard R here, because we dislike blacks.

>> No.44787431

>>44772051
NEETbux, I touch 1000€ monthly here in France. So I have a lot of money do many things I want.

>> No.44787438

>>44787431
>France
apologise for blaming us for world war one

>> No.44787452

>>44785472
It's easy to save enough money as a NEET when you live in a country with a good welfare system (therefore, not americans lol), and if you live wiht your parents, it's way easier.

>> No.44787595

>>44787091
Fine, but don't expect much. I have zero social skills.
Blus#2185

>> No.44787800
File: 685 KB, 1869x2618, untitled_(6).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44787800

I'm studying japanese through the school system
The lessons and work material are good, but going outside is such a pain... The noise in cities is unbearable. I hate going outside, and going outside to study japanese makes me hate japanese. I know it's stupid, but I can't help it.

I'm halfway through the paperwork to obtain my neetbux. I should be able to obtain my japanese diploma before then. In three years or so, I hope I'll be a happy, lone NEET in a less noisy area of the country.

>> No.44788111
File: 848 KB, 1080x1058, Screenshot_20230926-235824.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44788111

>>44787409
I am sorry master I have forgotten our ways

>> No.44788122
File: 786 KB, 1080x1476, Screenshot_20230923-173256.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44788122

>>44787404
Holy shit, you're truly idiotic to the point of thinking someone picking apart your nonsensical "argument" is somehow not a result of you being wrong. Truly delusional.

>> No.44788147
File: 465 KB, 1080x1185, Screenshot_20230921-131054.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44788147

>>44787400
In what universe

You are incorrect and remain incorrect

>> No.44788223

>>44788122
If your brain was fully formed and functional you'd realize that I was making an exaggerated jest for entertainment value because you acted like a cringe zoomer on the internet. Nobody was trying to start an epic le debaterino, chill out. And stop showing us your unfunny secondary meme Reddit screenshots, we can tell it's you cope-replying to everyone rightfully calling you a retard for crying about getting roasted.

>> No.44788248
File: 77 KB, 686x569, 1694072299538392.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44788248

>>44781897
I'm not really good at the whole friend thing sorry

>> No.44788277
File: 425 KB, 1625x1250, ad4ed19cffd2977f6ca6566528193c33.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44788277

I'm doing alright, I suppose.
I've been working for about a year now, which has been easier than I thought, and everybody there seems pleased with me, despite being extremely unsociable, even to the point that my boss suggests putting in for promotions. The work can be fun sometimes, but usually I'm half-asleep fantasizing about this and that.
For my personal life, things still suck. Nothing has changed more or less. Still have no friends and no ability to make them. It's easier to distract myself with my hobbies that I can now fund, but that doesn't always work. I had some purpose a little while ago, but I recently gave up on that, as I didn't feel that I was up to the task. Now I'm just existing, and enjoy what I can, when I can. Pretty pointless. Ronery life. At least I can cope well enough that I don't want to kill myself.
Yes, I'm just doing alright.

>> No.44788288

>>44788147
>>44788122
>>44788111
You know this was a mostly serious thread before you showed up. Please allow it to return to such a state.
I'm not even going to mention the rest of what's wrong with your posts, try to reflect on what a dipshit you are being privately.

>> No.44788375

>>44785700
I'm short and I cannot fucking change that

>> No.44788440

>>44788375
speaking honestly though, short guys are mad cute. chin up bro, you're somebody's type.

>> No.44788498

>>44788440
Yeah, short guys are cute. The problem is that I'm saying this as a faggot.

>> No.44788509

>>44788498
Why are you a faggot?

>> No.44788602

>>44788498
Don't some gay dudes love short guys?

>> No.44788613

>>44788509
Combination of childhood heavy metal exposure and loneliness.

>>44788602
Yeah. I'm not the anon that complained about being short, I didn't mean to make it come off like that.

>> No.44788621

>>44788602
Gay guys have AIDS so they want to spread their disease to the more unfortunate

>> No.44788663

I know that magic exists now. Sadly I'm really bad at it, so safety is the only thing I can use it for, only because self-preservation is such an integral part of the human experience.

>> No.44788928
File: 132 KB, 1280x720, 1695850283943367.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44788928

>>44788223
Le backpedaling

>> No.44788964
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44788964

>>44788288
Why are you getting frustrated on the behalf of others. Sorry for interrupting the peace but I refuse to let individuals who bare inherently flawed arguments roam free.

I also like how you don't really insult anything specific you just say "You're bad because you are" which won't Really help anyone

>> No.44788973

Dude who will be 30 soon, been browsing since shortly a few years after /jp/ was made (don't think too hard about that).
I've actually accomplished a lot of what I dreamed of browsing 4chan growing up for what that is worth. Got a decent paying if dead-end tech job which is just WFH a few nights a week in a smol town with fiber, learned several languages including Japanese and translated doujin, traveled parts of the world and got a decent education that I can pursue myself to my own aims. With that along with no debts, quitting drinking while I was ahead, and having enough savings for a decent downpayment in most places in the states, I feel like I'm in a position many here would kill for.

On the other hand, the lack of a creative outlet or any socialization outside of family gets to me in a way I haven't really been able to resolve, and I don't really like online chatting, so I mainly ride around this rural town reading to kill time. I'll go out to restaurants and parks, but never seems to be anyone interested beyond a mutual hello over the years. I've lived in big cities and honestly only encountered a bit different. I never have issues with coworkers or people who are compelled to interact with me, but it feels like I'm a social repellent from the moment I open my mouth - nothing bad to say, just a schizoid who never got into pop culture or cared about status - I get along with people who seem to be on the spectrum the best. I'm a great active listener from what I've been told, but I do notice conversations with me where people leave happy usually have me mostly listening.

Been trying to find a group of people IRL to do stuff like creative work or tabletop, but most people my age from either high school or uni really either seem to be in some metro area or just unreachable outside of social media (stopped using mid 2010s). At least I have little drama and have family.

>> No.44788992

>>44788928
Actually, nevermind about finding a gf, I'm fine being single if it means I don't run the chance of spawning more retards like these.

>> No.44789012

>>44788992
>spawning more retards like these.
Imagine having children in this day and age

>> No.44789082

>>44789012
Not him but my fetish is pregnancy. Unfortunately for me I'm a shut-in so I'll never fulfill my fantasy of making a girl pregnant.

>> No.44789099
File: 404 KB, 640x480, Patchouliknowledgeprofile.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789099

>>44788973
Man. This is real. However I want to talk about The Japanese bit, we are on /jp/ after all. What level are you? You know from N5 to N1. Japanese it quite difficult.
So I wanted your insight and if you have any tips or something.

>> No.44789128

>>44789082
If you go to church you can find socially awkward women who dream of having families of 10+, the only downside is that you have to share her with Jesus.

>> No.44789138
File: 101 KB, 600x580, Patchouli.Knowledge.600.199056.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789138

>>44788992
Imagine becoming celibate because of some guy on 4chan dissecting your argument. It's really not that serious. (As if you had a chance anyways) but moreover the other anon is right. Who has children in this day and age, in this economy. No thanks.

>> No.44789167

>>44789138
Can you actually fuck off? You are, as many others have said, killing the vibe. If you keep this shit up not only will I not have children but I will convince your parents to perform a very late term abortion too.

>> No.44789169

>>44789138
Being called underage really made you upset, didn't it?

>> No.44789181

>>44789082
Imagine if an anon ITT got transformed into a 2hu but they still keep their personality and memories. That is impregnation material!

>> No.44789246
File: 264 KB, 626x885, Patchouli.Knowledge.full.1184699.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789246

>>44789167
No but you're free to have that standpoint

>>44789167
Like I said in my previous >>44788964
I apologize however my actions have reason. Maybe if people realized being wrong is a normal thing instead of clinging to idiotic arguments humanity would get somewhere.

>Late term abortion
Those fuckers will never find my castle.

Anyways now that the argument has concluded (conceded) Wanna be friends?

>> No.44789262
File: 116 KB, 315x393, 1553031438842.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789262

>>44782481
It's still 2 whole days until the next Rabbit Rabbit thread, and I'll probably just forget about it again by then...

>> No.44789331

>>44789128
What a coincidence. I love Jesus too.

>> No.44789400

>>44789331
Jesus was Jewish

>> No.44789401

>>44789400
Same.

>> No.44789421

>>44789401
Shalom Mr. Cohen Shlomo Avraham Shekelstein

>> No.44789440

>>44789421
I want to make love to Sanae.

>> No.44789466

>>44785700
That's why I said men are better in "every way that matters". Maybe I am biased because I personally am not interested in dating but I don't count that as a field that matters.

>> No.44789635
File: 532 KB, 1000x1000, mugesip.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789635

>>44789246
>>44789138
>>44788964
>>44789099
Reminder that everyone can see you and what you have posted. This isn't a debate, it's a public forum.

>> No.44789642
File: 83 KB, 620x687, cb51de1337878e10fdef67839ef7d83d.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789642

>>44788248
I believe in you

>> No.44789670
File: 56 KB, 425x600, Patchouli.Knowledge.600.2602370.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789670

>>44789635
Of course, it is for everyone to see.
Did I argue too hard?

>> No.44789681

>>44789670
Patchouli impregnation nakadashi sex

>> No.44789709

>>44789670
It's more the fact that no one really cares but you, and everyone else just wants you to shut up.
You also dragged in shitposters with you, so there is that.

>> No.44789762
File: 172 KB, 748x1062, 86059-Touhou-Patchouli_Knowledge-748x1062.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789762

>>44787595
Turn on your requests you fucker

>> No.44789777
File: 77 KB, 710x444, thumb2-patchouli-knowledge-touhou-characters-girl-with-violet-hair-artwork-pachurii-noorejji.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44789777

>>44789709
Maybe bitches should keep their retarded arguments to themselves. Go see where it started. + I never cared what others think especially online lmao.

>> No.44790325
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44790325

>>44780393
femanon 3 here, I feel the same way, I can't imagine myself in a relationship with someone who doesn't want to foam at the mouth with me. However, my experience with men who are into the same things as me has honestly been negative for the most part due to their complete lack of social skills, unwillingness to improve their own life, and just lack of charisma in general. I almost made it to full normie status last year just through university socialization and being a mediocre looking girl, so I tried to get to know some of the men in my circle and it was absolutely terrible. Sure they had many friends and great futures ahead of them, but I could never see them as anything more than an acquaintance. I could not connect with any of them because they were missing that specific degree of retardation you can only develop by being in certain online spaces growing up. I'm honestly not sure which option to settle with any more

>> No.44790375 [DELETED] 
File: 311 KB, 715x1000, 1ce7936c7408f65696c2bbe8bdc28e43 (1).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44790375

>>44790325
Fuck you!

>> No.44790460
File: 491 KB, 800x896, sleepy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44790460

>>44790375
That's not very nice!

>> No.44790491 [DELETED] 
File: 218 KB, 777x1087, ce589e90706da49b7bde607dcc57de23 (1).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44790491

>>44790460
Don't worry, I meant it literally.

>> No.44790539
File: 1.54 MB, 1500x1013, winter remi.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44790539

>>44790491
Thank god, you had me worried for a second

>> No.44790694
File: 2.05 MB, 498x498, iv887x9qskmb1.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44790694

>>44790375
>>44790491

Drop the numbers

>> No.44790859
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44790859

>>44780393
>>44790325
Reading this as a socially inept neet is a bit dismaying.
Although I can't say I'm surprised.

>> No.44790904
File: 117 KB, 500x666, 52ba796c74880dc3d35cb26acec0e2189eccbd36.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44790904

>>44790859
Don't give up, anon, it's just because I somehow strayed from my original path and ended up on a more erm... well integrated path, so now I have expectations like this. There are definitely girls out there who don't feel this way, and would actually prefer someone who is more like themselves

>> No.44791030

>>44790904
>>44790325

Now I'm wondering if I don't have an epic femanon /jp/ gf because I haven't put myself out there enough, or if I'm actually just below any reasonable standard. Probably a combination of both.

>> No.44791893

I keep imagining I'm a superhero and am fighting evil and saving the world. An unlikely hero fighting against impossible circumstances, even opposing the real chosen one "main character" of the story.
My fantasies are so elaborate I feel like my grasp on reality is slipping. I don't take any drugs, even coffee or alcohol. The "drug" causing these powerful illusions is loneliness. Which is very funny because I see myself as a lonely superhero full of sorrow.

>> No.44791919
File: 2.91 MB, 266x176, 1588119412524.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44791919

I guess I am pretty excited about the short term future thanks to jaypee. Through a pretty long series of coincidences that was started by being into a touhou shoegaze band I will be going to work in Japan doing a job I love over the winter.

Thanks 2hu.

>> No.44791961

I just wanted to say I love you, jaypee. Thank you for everything. We can do it.

>> No.44792474

>>44788973
Don't worry too much, being in your 30s this generation still feels very young. Similar boat as you, I'm 28 now and I started browsing jp when I was 12. I idolized NEEThood for a long time, so that held me back but I'm doing fine now. I think you'd be happier too if you resigned to having non-2hu fans as partners and friends in life. It just wasn't as important as I thought it was.

>> No.44792727

>>44791030
Because they're rare and have high standards

>> No.44792847
File: 22 KB, 400x396, 35e30a120c93a3ecdfed3a332ba97eb6efe7247af603b774caeb4838785028d7.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44792847

>>44782401
i purchased H doujinshi from that flandre artist during last year's autumn reitaisai but i had to make a connection in canada and was so scared of getting busted for lolicon materials that i abandoned the doujinshi in a public bathroom

>> No.44792918

>>44792847
Why is Canada such a shithole that they ban cartoons holy shit

>> No.44792971

>>44792918
It's run by trudeau castro, why else?

>> No.44793033
File: 16 KB, 695x730, __hakurei_reimu_touhou_drawn_by_bbyong403__9f015eb5cbc356926a8f7d4fcb55b15f.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44793033

I'm the head of a big project and it feels like I'm surrounded by vultures. People I used to consider friends leap at the opportunity to try and snatch up my responsibilities and the credit for my work. It's kind of depressing, seems like people don't have any loyalty or respect anymore.

>> No.44793330

>>44769398
Suffering with on and off severe chronic pain but otherwise not too bad. Want to go to church but I'm too lazy and don't feel like I'm ready just yet to repent with my whole heart.

>> No.44793574

>>44790325
Oftentimes irl ones will drop the retardation and not be genuine about their interests because every time you're around it becomes ZOMG WOMAN!! whereas the online ones will be a complete mess of a human being. It's soul crushing.

>> No.44793682

>>44793574
Have you tried not being a woman?

>> No.44793704
File: 55 KB, 850x850, k.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44793704

>>44793682
I considered it, but if I get gapped to Gensokyo I might have a better chance at becoming a cute touhou girl if I stay this way.

>> No.44793967

>>44793704
What do you think of this >>44789181

>> No.44794015

>>44793967
Sounds fun.

>> No.44794023

>>44793574
>drop the retardation and not be genuine about their interests
You may be reading too much into this. I am always polite, formal, and very distant with people I barely knew. Last time I actually opened up and made a new friend it took ~3mo of seeing the dude every single day (work colleagues, he's almost always assigned to me). I treat everyone that way. Male, female, if I'm not very familiar with them, I just stay distant. No discussing things I genuinely like.

>> No.44794028

>>44794015
In what way is it fun?

>> No.44794457
File: 807 KB, 1015x1505, Patchouli.Knowledge.full.1698746.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44794457

>>44793033
That's fucked. Do you just not feel like telling on them or something?

>> No.44794465
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44794465

>>44792847
>>44792918
>>44792971

Just W*st things

Fucking shit hole. Hopefully somehow who truly valued Flandre and Touhou received it.

>> No.44794526

>>44794465
Reminds me of that YouTuber Cryiotic who got called a child molester because he dated a 16 year old when he was 20

Really goes to show how much power politicians have. If a bunch of senile fossilized politicians agree that the age of consent should be set to an arbitrary number like 18, their word is taken as gospel

>> No.44794978

https://youtu.be/kuNixp-wvWM?si=saGZYUAB3QeZcGM6
soup /jp/ can you find me the space jam version? i cant find it for the life of me

>> No.44795029
File: 117 KB, 500x500, 1627707247994.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44795029

>>44794465
>Hopefully somehow who truly valued Flandre and Touhou received it.
don't be mean ´´kudasai", if i got in legal trouble i wouldn't be able to import nearly as many doujinshi to the states as i do now. i'm just glad i supported that artist and his passions and that i can continue to support other artists in the future.

>> No.44795094

>>44794526
The thing there is "got called" rather than "got charged" - if he wasn't someone of such note to receive baseless accusations of little real significance - like being some literal-who in bumfuck nowhere - he'd likely just get flack from people around if any.
It's pretty easy to discern most early 20-something guys as anyone older, and if the dude looks like they are dating primarily for the naivety, lack of experience, or "purity" of the girl above all else that is where the predatory vibe gets teeth.

People out of high school dating people who are in high school and had no earlier connection is the taboo; age differences get less and less flack as people get older, especially if both are independent of their families.

>> No.44795175

>>44795094
Taboos are just taboos. There is no legitimate reason to think that a 16 year old cannot make adult decisions for themselves.

>> No.44795219

>>44780399
what the fuck

>> No.44795243

>>44772347
Girls with mental illnesses! Right what I need!

>> No.44795271

>>44772658
Holy shit you're just like me with the exception of the cutting stuff! Want to be friends?

>> No.44795289

>>44779422
I used to fap once every couple of days in high school. But ever since I graduated I masturbate like 2 - 5 times every day now. It's getting to me mentally, cause I feel a sort of tingly itch near my forehead whenever I get horny and want to masturbate. The itch won't stop until i masturbate at least twice. I masturbate once, but I still feel like I can keep going so I wring out another load like 10 minutes after. I feel like I'm masturbating not necessarily because I'm horny but more of a combination of stress, anxiety and anger plus depraved degenerate horniness.

>> No.44795585

>>44789099
I never took the JLPT - signed up for N3 testing once while job-hunting to maximize odds but missed the examination. The closest experience I have with language testing is the TOCFL for Mandarin - and in that case I was able to score much higher than my perceived fluency simply by studying for the TOCFL itself.

My actually Japanese level is very basic with speaking/listening from lack of practice - can watch anime with Japanese subs. Reading is sufficient to get through what I want to get through, but I am slow from lack of necessity. If I stop reading much for a few months (life/depression), it takes time to get back into practice and recognize characters and words that aren't basic, but the grammar and syntax experience persists.
My primary advice would to put yourself in situations where you must use the language you are learning to make sense - learned most in my language classes and traveling that way.

>> No.44798065
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44798065

>>44795029
What's his name

>> No.44798536

>>44788440
>>44788602
Unless I can have cosplay sex with a cute male crossplayer dressed as a 2hu then it doesn't do me any good

>> No.44802479

>>44780399
I want to be your friend

>> No.44802802
File: 476 KB, 1312x2048, 106546745_p0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44802802

I'd say that I'm feeling okay? I honestly don't even know, it all feels melancholic, empty and confusing. If my mom asks me if I'm fine I have trouble to even think of a proper answer. I don't know how I feel and yet at the same time know that there simply isn't anything. Ah, even if, I'd have problems to talk about my emotions, because the few times I do feel something or have an opinion my throat just gets stuck and I lose interest in opening up quickly afterwards. So I have a rather neutral or apathetic look and feeling towards most thinks, but even then it might confuse me, like a cat that suddenly became more sentient or something. Atleast my dreams are nice, even if they might suck or be rather questionable sometimes. I began to understand what some of them might mean and came to the conclusion that some of them must be a reflection of the various things inside of me, bad, good or simple interests. Aside from that, I'm no longer a NEET, I was coerced out of that and am now stuck in retail. Atleast I don't have to work full-time and get left alone. Furthermore, since I still live with my parents I get to see and hear what goes on between them. Mom will move out with two of my siblings while my future stay is still in question, but I think I'd have to go with mom. I can't help, but feel like I'm part of the reasons they no longer get along and dad wishes to part.

>> No.44802856

Doing great. So much lies ahead.

>> No.44803110

Nigga, i live in Brazil, live is shit.

>> No.44803142

>>44802802
It's weird, I have a positive version of what you have. Like a positive apathy, if that makes sense. I don't care about anything or anyone but it doesn't feel bad or hollow. It's like being in a perpetual state of contentment. This sounds nice on paper but I can see that it's not good for me either. I have always found it very difficult to do anything with my life because I don't care to. I don't care about things like money, status, or love. For me, the point of life is to simply enjoy it to the best of my ability and it doesn't take much to please me. All I need to be happy is a day free of any obligations and a relatively comfortable environment, and I have plenty of those as a NEET.

I know that this is the only reason I can be as content as I am. I'm living in a comfortable illusion maintained by people who do what I won't and that their good will is the only thing keeping the darkness of reality at bay. I know that I am a waste of life such that shouldn't exist and I have long believed that my existence is some sort of cosmic mistake. If God has a plan then I most certainly slipped his mind when he was making it. Maybe I'm wrong and the pointlessness of my existence is also somehow a part of the plan. I am not Christian or even religious, yet these are the things I speculate on when I happen to contemplate my existence. At the end of the day, it doesn't really matter to me. Mistake or not, I still exist, and I will enjoy my life until I am no longer able to.

My apologies for piggybacking off of your post like this. Sorry to hear about your ejection from NEETdom. Retail is a kind of hell that no one deserves to have to suffer through. I hope to see it automated under amicable circumstances some day, for the sake of humanity.

>> No.44803206
File: 100 KB, 433x757, clownpiece_br.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44803206

>>44803110
My apologies

>> No.44803251

>>44803142
Aah, it's fine. One day my NEETdom had to end and I must say a small part in me atleast enjoys to carry around boxes and sort them out back in the storage. Still, being held to the responsibility to always be there is annoying and the shakiness before my shifts never truly went away. Being a NEET brings a certain freedom that is impossible to attain when you work a job, no matter how small or nice that job might be.
It propably didn't come off as it in my prior post, but this feeling of apathy isn't really a negative one for me aswell. My life might be rather grey, but I came to be content with that. The problem with it comes when others want something from me and I simply cannot react properly. I guess my main problem is that I wish to do something more with my life, but I simply care too little or lack the ability to do so. That and I'm simply not ok with the world around me, so escapist fantasies like Touhou or daydreams became a normality.

>> No.44803257

>>44802802
>>44803142
If you have to stop NEETing, I suggest going warehousing. Job's mostly boring and repetitive, you can actually daydream a lot of it away once you've learned all the motions. Plus you can actually get pretty decent bucks getting a forklift certification and working night shifts. Competition can be pretty stiff for it though, being a job you can get into and get a decent payckeck without much beyond having a pulse and being able to lift 20 kilos, so the immigrants flock to it. But there's always more demand for warehouse workers. Just also stay away from certain big names that have a history of labour abuse.

>> No.44803280

>>44803251
>That and I'm simply not ok with the world around me
What aspect of it?

>> No.44803319

>>44803257
I'm so incompetent I would probably fuck up even easy menial jobs like that, bro. I get so anxious and stressed and shit for no reason.

>> No.44803434

I wish /jp/ anons were real so I could be friends with them. You guys aren't real. You're just words on a screen!

>> No.44803450

>>44803257
I know someone who works such a job. He makes it sound comfy despite the long hours. Unfortunately I would have to learn how to drive to get to the warehouse in the first place and that is a test I am likely to fail, given my propensity for spacing out.

>> No.44803474

>>44803450
You can't drive? I remember my asshole father trying to teach me how to drive by yelling and screaming at me, and the absplutely atrocious bureacrats at the DMV

>> No.44803489
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44803489

>>44803280
It feels like the world is too big yet also too small, if that makes sense. In my first post I mentioned that I sometimes feel like a cat that became more sentient. For whatever reason the moment I try to think of anything that somewhat resembles a collective, like a city, population or state, my head begins to burn after some time and I simply want to get away from it. Yet, just like a cat, I do not want to sit around all day and wish to go on my own little cat adventures. But where do I go?
I'm a loner, there's nothing to argue about that, but I cannot help to desire to be part of something bigger. Perhaps that's an aspect of my old self before everything began to fall down and life became more and more gloomy. Yet when I step out and hear people talk I immediately want to be left alone.
My dreams show me life's that I'd enjoy much more, but it's just dreams, reality is much harsher and different? Not sure how I could explain that. Perhaps I became to accustomed to my dreams and daydreams that reality feels much more uncomfortable and foreign.
Then I also have certain responsibilities I simply never asked for, but am forced to take care of. I can understand that they might be a necessary "evil", like a job, but I really wish I could escape them. I also have a rather clingy mother, which makes it a bit more harder to get out. I'm also most likely a mommy boy I don't hate her and I will take care of her, but I dislike things that bind me someway or another.
I wish I could fall down a well and find myself in a more fantasy-like world, I'd like to simply walk around, collect stuff, have a little fight with some skeleton or miku and then go to sleep.

>> No.44803522

>>44803319
It's real hard to mess up warehousing these days. You get a scanner that tells you exactly what you're picking and warns you if you're hitting the wrong thing. You basically have to be trying to mess it up. Forklifts are a bit harder but it's still fairly easy and just takes a bit of practice, and everyone buggers something up on a fork, nobody'll hold it against you.

>>44803450
>learn how to drive
Ah, yeah, that will be a much bigger problem.

>> No.44803560

>>44803474
I'm not the smartest person around but I know that people dumber than me know how to drive. My main worry is that my clumsiness and habit of spacing out will lead to deaths if I am behind the wheel of a car.

>> No.44803603

>>44803560
I think you'd do fine, anon. You just need some practice. I have a driver's license, but I get really anxious when I drive to new places. I always need to have a GPS that tells me what route I need to take to go places.

>> No.44803894
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44803894

>>44803489
>Yet when I step out and hear people talk I immediately want to be left alone.
I too like the idea of being part of the world but that's as far as it goes for me. I already know that in practice, I'd much rather just be by myself. It's still a fun little fantasy to entertain sometimes though. What would it be like if I was not as asocial as I am? The possibilities are endless.

>I wish I could fall down a well and find myself in a more fantasy-like world
It seems a bit silly but part of the reason why I refused to engage with reality is because it was not as beautiful as I would have like it to be and I mean purely from an aesthetic standpoint. I wanted to live in a world of grand architecture and picturesque landscapes but even as a kid I knew that such a thing would never be possible and that the kind of beauty I am looking for will never exist on the scale that I would like it to in reality. I dreamed of a circumstance like you described all my life. Like I said in my first post. I don't think I belong in this world. I hoped that maybe that mistake rectified later in life and I would find myself somewhere more suitable through a miracle like that.

I can't exist in modern conventional society, what makes me think I would fare any better in an alternate one? I can't say that I will but if I could see a glimpse of that beauty before I die I would be happier for it.

>> No.44804163
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44804163

these last weeks were a bit rough, I cried a lot, got sick and been feeling paranoic because of people being creeps. Things are a bit better now and Im grateful of the awesome people I have met here to whom I have gotten close.

>> No.44804258

>>44803434
I'll be your friend, anon!

>> No.44804674

>>44772258
You're this anon >>>/a/257647696
Huh?

>> No.44806625
File: 866 KB, 847x1200, 88078117_p0_master1200.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
44806625

I'll be turning 30 later this month. Shit, this is the first time I even type the age,even though it's been on my mind ever since I turned like 27 or some shit. Still no gf, still live at home, but I'm not too depressed about those facts.
I'll be travelling throughout Europe around the time of my birthday. I tell my folks it's because of a birthday present to myself, but the truth is I feel too ashamed to still be living at home with no family of my own, a shit paying job and no real clue of what I want out of life as I turn three decades old. I find it hard to hate myself because there are many things I do appreciate about myself, but I also am very self aware of the objective failure I turned out to be, especially when compared to my dad or the expectations I placed upon myself.
I'm a little drunk but this is the only place I've ever felt comfortable sharing personal shit with, since we're all anonymous faggots. Thanks for reading my blog.

>> No.44806735

>>44806625
>I'll be travelling throughout Europe around the time of my birthday
Post detailed Itinerary so european jpsies can find you and harass you

>> No.44806786
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44806786

>>44806625
Happy early birthday

>> No.44807681
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44807681

No job despite having a few certificates and high education but am lucky enough that my parents while not rich aren't poor so I can live as NEET and don't need to take another job where my employer pays me 2 months after and less than they should while also insulting me. Kinda want some cash though as my laptop is old and dying and struggles playing Youtube videos. Living humbly but aside from access to internet and being able to play a few old games I don't need much. In fact I could eat stale bread and still enjoy the taste so I don't exactly have high needs. Was quite content living the way I did until recently. One of my very few friends got depressed again and stopped talking with me saying they just need some alone time and apologizing for not contacting me in the near future. I worried about her especially since 3 of my 4 friend are now depressed. I was checking and sending daily messages to all of them trying to cheer them up. She did not even check the messages which was okay by me since I myself sometimes need some alone time but then I saw an alert that they have posted something on their social media account which did scare me a bit. Turns out they were spending time with friends and doing fun stuff and I can't help but feel like it's not that she's spending time with closer friends but that she actively trying to avoid me. I feel like I'm losing another friend and she's not the only of those 4 friends I get the feeling I'm losing. Even worse since she's the only friend of mine that is a girl this whole situation is making me into a bit of a misogynist which I don't want to be but when I barely speak to people even less girls it's hard not to just blindly hate a whole group of people for perceived failure of one person. And to add to that her having rich life with luxuries and what not makes me feel a bit jealous and like I'm less of a person (Despite trying my best to take care of myself I look like a crack addict). All things considered maybe a good meal and a good sleep will make me feel okay again. Sorry for this mess of a text.

>> No.44808192

>>44807681
Are you a gril too?

>> No.44808277

>>44808192
No, a man (though I don't act like one despite wanting to).

>> No.44808494

>>44785730
Possibly. I have many female friends I love but the issues/drama they bring upon themselves with 0 self-awareness is painful and embarrassing. Could not imagine living with one.
t. huge faggot my whole life

>> No.44808645
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44808645

I'm alive I suppose, life is life. I am really nervous about returning to Japan in a week or so, visiting some friends and whatnot. Been super into playing Cruelty Squad recently, so much that my friends get a little annoyed at how much I reference it haha. Right now I am just drawing shit, I used to be super envious of my friends who are infinitely more talented than I am, plus they aren't at a physical disadvantage like how I am, but I am trying I guess. My Flandre figure right next to me is giving me some form of hope for the future.

>> No.44808671

>>44808645
Looks good.

>> No.44808744
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44808744

Here is the most recent drawing if anyone is interested, yes I really adore Flandre.

>> No.44808763

>>44808744
Pretty good.

>> No.44808831

>>44769523
If you say sorry and explain what happened to them and that you do like them, the ones worth keeping will understand. Could be all of them or none of them, but then you'll know.

>> No.44808891

>>44808744
What do you like about her?

>> No.44808978
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44808978

>>44806625
I reached that milestone not long ago, and it isn't as bad as people make it out to be. Age comes with some benefits that people rarely talk about, such as a better sense of perspective.
Work and relationships are far trickier and I still haven't figured them out myself, but we have no choice but to keep at it until things work out. And if they don't, at least we tried.

>> No.44808997
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44808997

>>44808277
>despite wanting to

>> No.44809048
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44809048

>>44808891
She is adorable. I empathize with her isolation, and I view her as a very tragic little girl. I want to make her happy.

This is something I have been working on for the past day or so, it's not finished yet but I have been trying to grind some art out before my flight leaves next week.

>> No.44809095

>>44806625
>I find it hard to hate myself because there are many things I do appreciate about myself, but I also am very self aware of the objective failure I turned out to be
Me too. I may objectively be a worthless waste of life but I have all the worth in the world to myself and that's all that matters to me. I say embrace selfishness and narcissism because the self is all people like us have and will likely ever have.

>> No.44809122

I can't even travel more than 15 miles away from where I live how could I expect to ever travel to Japan?

>> No.44809148

>>44809122
What's stopping you from traveling that distance?

>> No.44809166 [DELETED] 

dominik capek 19 m, Mohylová 447/73, 312 00 Plzeň 4-Doubravka, Czechia help him

>> No.44809186

>>44809148
if it makes you feel any better, I never once traveled by myself before going to Japan.

>> No.44809234

>>44769398

Thanks for asking!!
For the first time in over seven years, I'm happy again!

I was able to get myself out of an addiction, find purpose, get into college, and enjoy life again. I kicked depression's ass so hard, I hope it stays away for at least a good while! >:D

I hope you're doing well too, OP!

>> No.44810277

>>44773151
Moving out of your parents' place fixes this

>> No.44810291

>>44773151
Maybe a third job will do the trick.

>> No.44810434
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44810434

>>44769398
I'm doing fine, I'm functionally living alone but having 0 irl friends hurts quite a lot
But there's no solution with that, I don't know how to make friends but even if I did I don't click with normalfags at all
What's worse is that I'm so used to being alone to the point I don't click well with people with better taste anymore, at this point I can't make online friends either

>> No.44810483

>>44771316
If she starts telling you that she requires severed heads for a ritual then I suggest you fulfill the request and see where it all goes.

>> No.44810590
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44810590

>>44808831
I did for some and for the rest I still physically can't talk to them for some reason. Just considering it makes me physically ill.
Boy, I sure wish I wasn't such a fuckin' whiney emotional idiot.

>> No.44810628

Threads like these always remind me to truly appreciate the blessing that is my preference for solitude.

>> No.44810783

>>44772051
>What's your guys' secret to actually meeting people if you're a NEET?
I got into a relationship with a girl who browsed 4chan. If you do something long enough eventually you'll get into a relationship. Almost every community has girls. You'll never have any success if you don't go for it.

>> No.44810970

I've been slowly growing more bitter and full of resentment. There was a time when I used to go out of my way to do charitable stuff, but having been fucked over so much really starts wearing you down. It's at the point where I don't even bother to hide my disdain for certain people anymore.

Like I can't remember the last time someone's done something considerate for me. I used to go out of my way to help people in a bad spot, but now that I'm actually in one, I feel completely alone. It's a pretty miserable feeling. The worst part of being self-aware of it is it's a spiral, I'm in such a bad mood all the time now that of course no one wants to spend time with you either, but I can't exactly pretend to be happy and outgoing anymore either which just lends itself to me becoming even more withdrawn. I just wish somebody'd ask me how I'm doing, or if they could help out somehow instead of just steering clear of me. I'm not sure if I've just got terrible friends, or if I'm the terrible one.

>> No.44811009

>>44810970
How are you doing?

>> No.44811098

>>44811009
Silly anon, you're too kind. Thank you.

My problem is moreso with the people I called my friends. The fact that I've known most of them for years, and not a single one of them has asked me that same question is what hurts the most, even when it's pretty clear I've been doing horribly. Doubly so since I always listened to their problems and tried to help them out when they were in a bad spot. Now that I'm in the same spot, it's pretty depressing that none of them have at least tried reaching out. I'd feel infinitely better if just one of my friends over the years showed some shred of concern for me, but alas.

>> No.44811178

You guys aren't real /jp/ers. Real /jp/ers are introverts who don't experience normalfag emotions like loneliness. A real /jp/er thinks women are pig disgusting and prefer 2D girls. I think /r9k/ is the board you're looking for.

>> No.44811259

>>44811098
Just because they don't ask doesn't mean they don't care about you. Using myself as an example, I tend to see personal problems as being just that. Personal. They are best dealt with by the individual experiencing them. Unless they explicitly ask me for help or advice, I will leave the sufferer to their devices and trust that they will ask for help if they require it.

Whether they simply respect your space or are just oblivious, the fact is that they are not going to help you unless you ask for it. If you are going to judge them for being poor friends then do so after seeing how they deal with an honest request for support.

>> No.44811273

>>44811178
What about idolfags?

>> No.44811497

>>44811273
The idolfags were always the red headed step child of /jp/. They aren't real /jp/ers.

>> No.44813597
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44813597

>/jp/ers

>> No.44813637
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44813637

>>44811178
>Real /jp/ers are introverts who don't experience normalfag emotions like loneliness.
This is what i thought 10 years ago but when you are alone long enough it starts to slowly rip you a part and eventually you just need to break away from your hermit ways or mentally break yourself, no matter who you are.

>> No.44814947
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44814947

>>44810970
You sound like a good friend anon, sorry your current friends don't appreciate you. I should ask my friends how they're doing more. I don't like when people ask me that so I don't ask it to others, but it's a sign of consideration I guess.
>>44813637
Break away from your hermit ways by reviving a dead girl to do everything for you and use her as a shie-
Wait a minute.

>> No.44815515
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44815515

>>44769398
i'm doing good

>> No.44815584

I sent a friend request on Discord to a girl who I had a lot of fun playing with in a Touhou themed Minecraft server

>> No.44815824

>>44772107
At least your dad is still alive. This year I lost both my parents after years of taking care of them, their chronic health issues finally caught up to them and I have been an empty husk with no purpose since. I hate everything, it's been months and I can't find joy in anything anymore, even my favorite food tastes like nothing. So yes, that is quality father-son bonding time.

>> No.44816185

>>44815584
I want to play too, how do I?

>> No.44816358

>>44816185
You need a legitimate copy of Minecraft (no pirates), you can't make offensive racist comments, and there aren't any mods (it's pure vanilla). I don't think you'd like it

>> No.44816391
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44816391

Anyways she accepted my request but she said she couldn't even remember who I was

I mean it's been months since we played but still

>> No.44816555

>>44815824
I can't wait for my parents to die. It sounds terrible, but they're absolute pieces of shit. I can't even imagine having actual happy memories with parents because of them.

>> No.44817899

>>44816555
Are you okay? Do you need a hug?

>> No.44819217
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44819217

>>44816555
You see this is the absolute polar opposite of humans that makes us interesting, I can say that I'm more with the 2nd. They fucking suck and them dropping dead would be beneficial for me.

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