/jp/ - Otaku Culture

I like Rem

Remsleep

>>44444334
That's a very good Rem, thank you

What can you do to make your blood tastier?

>>44444320
I like her cool wings.

You know what, I used to frequent /jp/ in 2012 and I wouldn't shed a single tear if the 'arty got the GET. This board is a shadow of its former self. When was the last time there was a Tablecat thread, or a SJIS therad in general? What about Gikopoi? And all the shitposting and fun times that we used to have without 500 generals in the fucking catalog? Dead. Gone and burried. I wouldn't be sad one bit if the Sharty won the get, at least they know how to take it easy sometimes.

This board is dead. Everything that /jp/ should be about, Heyuri does 100x better now.

Pic related has never rang more true.


I'm posting this in this thread because I'm rangebanned for some God damn reason.

>>44444357
More sugar in the diet?

>>44444362
Rene Decartes never actually said this, though.

>>44444320

>>44444362
>SJIS
There's one up right now.

>>44444374
Baito sama, I kneel...

>>44444380
No there isn't.

>>44444362
Times change, old man.

LSD cob win

>>44444444

rem gegging sucks imo

>>44444416
Oh well, time for the next general.

>>44444320
Diapers

>>44444444

>>44444388
Make one. I will post on it.

>>44444620
I can't. I'm LITERALLY FUCKING RANGEBANNED NIIGGGER.

>>44444362
>Heyuri
fuck off kuz

>>44444868
Kuz died of AIDs

>>44444564
get killed faggot

>>44444362
Cool, but what made you choose Remilia thread specifically to make that post?

>>44444362
fr fr no cap

>>44447929
There were no posts in the thread and there still isn't. Gg Remi.

>>44444320

>>44444362
I think this is more of a 4chan issue than specifically a /jp/ issue

>>44449860
That's true. I'm sure it has a lot to do with Janny deleting shitposting that they view as off-topic. Then all that remains is sterilized general threads and the few imagedump threads.

You just can't take it easy anymore...

>>44449978
Get fucked if you think "janny deleting shitposting" has anything to do with why the site sucks. You cannot comprehend how good it was before your kind got here, child.

>>44444334
would she be able to ditch the coffin if she got married?

>>44452368
You're going to have to squeeze into it together with her.

>>44444320
Oh boy! A burger! This sure is delicious! I certainly hope no one sneaks up behind me and does erotic things to my virgin backside!

>>44453340
Cute burger

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y9OUfBDIGhw

>>44444374
It's in his fifth Meditations.

>>44452368
Yes, but after we got married she talked my into a queen size coffin. It's literally just a big bed inside a box, but if that's what makes her happy when we sleep together then do be it. Happy batwife, happy life.

remilias hymen probably regenerates

>>44462499
i misread this as remilia hates degenerates

>>44462776
Does she

>>44465683
Especially.

Your fantasies are getting weirder Sakuya...

>>44466536

Remi is cool!

I love her, but I also can't stop thinking very lewd thoughts about her.

>>44462499
Yes, and that's a very good thing.

>>44462776
She is secretly a degenerate herself.

I just realized nobody in the scarlet devil mansion has black hair...

>>44481401
Maybe that was a conscious decision by ZUN to make them seem more foreign.

>>44483755
Fun fact-the time period and area the SDM, or at least the sisters, come from has a habit of using powders to dye the hair of upper class women in shades of light blue, purple, and pink. So Remi may have, or had, different colored hair that was dyed blue. Patchouli may have other hair color, too. Personally I believe their hair is the color it is, but it's a fun little tidbit too think about.

>>44481401
and that's a good thing, they're supposed to be nobles, black hair would be seen as bland and for peasants

i had a blood test and nearly passed out. I imagine this is what Remi drinking from you feels like and it's very unpleasant. I wanted to be her source of nutrients but now not so sure

>>44483824
>baby's first steps into grimsokyo
Do you still want to be eaten by monsters even if they seem like girls?

>>44444896
Sobot...why did (((she))) do it?

>>44483830
obligatory

>>44483830
she's so mean to her food

>>44483824
If the blood test didn't involve a cute girl you could hug while she takes your blood and makes cute noises then it's not the same.

>>44483855
I mean I would
I want to kiss those bratty lips there
she can bite my neck after if she so desires.

>>44483859
it would probably be about the same unless she injects you with a fluid that placates you for easier feeding

I don't know why or how it happened, but I’m madly in love with Remi. Every day I fantasize about spending time with her in the SDM, of reading books and playing chess together, of making passionate love to each other, of letting her feed off of my blood to satiate her vampire thirst.

>>44483938
>letting her feed off of my blood
it would be extremely painful

>>44483945
It hurts, but I do it for Remi

>>44483945
Then I’ll become a masochist and learn to love the pain. Anything for my Remi.
I’m also a big guy.

>>44483953

Why is a vampire so adorable?

>>44483962
for you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ln2TDZfiWqM

>>44483965

Who knows.

Since she can regenerate her entire body from just a head, do you think she'd be willing to give you her wings as souvenirs?

>>44444362
Stop whining. If you're not willing to adapt and/or contribute to /jp/ as it is currently then you ought to leave. There are more than enough small imageboards out in space to contain people like you.

>>44487592

>>44487592
But why? Wouldnt the wing rot away? I’d rather play with her wings while they’re still attached, anyway. I like to imagine they’re erogenous zones for her.

>>44487626
No there aren't. Those are all effectively chat rooms filled with underageb& like yourself.

>>44488954
>I like to imagine they’re erogenous zones for her.
That's actually more likely than you think
Quoting wikipedia:
>The surface of the wings is equipped with touch-sensitive receptors on small bumps called Merkel cells, also found on human fingertips. These sensitive areas are different in bats, as each bump has a tiny hair in the center, making it even more sensitive and allowing the bat to detect and adapt to changing airflow
I now want to bully her wings.

>>44490103
Superb. Great info there anon. I’ll think of this next time I touch myself to Remi.

>>44490825
she wraps them around you to prevent you from escaping

>>44493308
Not that I’d try. But wing-lock along with leg-lock does sound nice.

>>44493596
do not struggle

>>44493608
Wouldnt dream of it. She can have her fill.

>>44493626
getting bit is said to be pleasurable for mortals and their pathetic bodies

GIWTWM

>>44493626
Chomp

>>44444362
this desu

im also an oldfag (started browsing in 2019)

this place used to give such a vibe before the normies came fr fr

>>44504481
>2019 was 9 years ago
Where does time go?

>>44505350
what is the context here?

Getting dressed must be hard for her with the wings getting in the way.

>>44515370
The duality of Remi clothes depictions

>>44490825
>>44493207

>>44493207
I can understand just enough nihongo to know that remimi is getting spanked to within an inch of her life.

>>44515515
I like the open back. Must be more comfy for her.

>>44506305
Remilia defeats local shrine maiden with her stamina...

>>44444334
REM sleep? Heheheheheh

>>44483830
No different than living among h*mans
They look h*man but don't act the part and will exploit you whenever they can until you're useless and fit for death
At least little girl youkai look cute and are more fun to befriend

>>44444360
Same

>>44516281
Befriending is nice and all, but I’d rather court, marry, and impregnate this bat.

>>44516300
vampires cant be impregnated

>>44516373
Love finds a way.

>>44516373
whatever part of the vampire's curse renders her unable to conceive, surely there is a magic that will counteract it
I bet you Patchouli already knows it and has been eagerly awaiting a man that will come along and give her an excuse to use her weird sex magic to tease the mistress

Cute Remiry, dudes

What I’d give to go to bed with this every night

>>44523637
You'd go to bed every day with her, you'd be up at night.

>>44515370
It's all about the custom made clothes.

>>44526546
Yeah, but putting them on or taking them off still seems complicated. Her and Flan probably need help getting dressed/undressed and that's part of Sakuya's job.

>>44526580
Of course. A true aristocrat never dresses themselves.

Imagine the smell of Mistress Remimi's 500-year unwashed vampire feet mixing with the smell of her fully loaded diaper.

>>44526942
First of all, no.
And afaik vampires are only weak to flowing water, so they can take baths as long as it's not in a river.

>>44526307
Fine. Whatever. So long as I get to live with my vampire wife.

I find her interesting. Tell me cool facts about her

>>44506305
6 horas de sexo.

>>44523637
I never wanted to bang Remilia but this artist makes it look like such fulfilling experience in every way that I can't help but feel a little sad about it.

>>44527145
She started 2 incidents. The print works tell of a vampire incident that wasn't in any of the games, the scarlet mist incident was actually the 2nd time she caused major trouble in Gensokyo.
The spell card rules were created because of that vampire incident (mentioned in Reimu's SSiB page), so Remi is partially responsible for the spellcard system existing.

>>44527244
>SSiB page
I meant PMiSS.

>>44527239
well i've always wanted to bang remilia ever since i was born

>>44527278
Like even as a 1 second old baby?

>>44527278
Sorry to cuck you anon, but she’s mine. We might name one of our children after you if you want.

my lungs

>>44526942
you're gonna be fucking murdered you piece of shit

>>44527387
>feeding the troll
Anon, what are you doing

https://twitter.com/i/status/1698672923027144815
God I wish I was Sakuya

alternatively: https://files.catbox.moe/b3xgt3.webm

>>44527382

>>44529936

>>44530180
Remimi finally beat Reimu!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhXC5tS9nX8

>>44531807
as it should be

>>44527356
Anonymous Scarlet does has a nice ring to it

>>44444325
I love Rem

>>44529936
>>44530180

>>44536310

>>44536247
Cute

What’s remi up to these days

>>44538837
she's trying dark outfits. what do you think?

>>44539107
Cute

>>44538837
I introduced her to video games. She’s not very good but having fun with it. Adorable how excited she gets at the smallest accomplishment.

>>44541612

>>44542439
Translate it weebs
I can only work out he thinks her hat ribbon is cute.

>>44541612
What games you introduced Remilia to ?

>>44541612
how far would Remi be able to get in her own game?
I bet she couldn't beat Cirno on easy

>>44543044
I feel like most youkai would have inhuman precision and reaction times, especially a youkai as powerful as a vampire, so beating any of the games wouldn't be a problem for them after a short period of getting used to the controls.

>>44538837

She was attempting to become an expert chef in two and a half weeks for fun.

>>44541612
I want to show Remilia the Legacy of Kain series!

>>44543286
Pro gamer Remilia

>>44541612
I bet Remilia would really love Castlevania.

>>44539107
Cute and remi

>>44542941
Just the basics. We played Mario Kart together. She was thrilled when she beat all of the CPUs and came in second. On 50cc, but hey, one step at a time.

>>44543044
If even. She’s still overwhelmed by games with that much happening. Too many flashing lights.

>>44543675
Excellent taste.

>>44543683
Not as much as you think. She thinks Dracula is overplayed and corny.

>>44545592
>She thinks Dracula is overplayed and corny.
But she herself has claimed to be related to Dracula even though that's a lie. She's overplaying him herself.

>>44545592
I want to play with Remilia !

>>44545592
imagine someone born in the 1500s playing video games. Remi thinks it's black magic

>>44545727
Remi didn't go to sleep in the 1500s and then woke up in the 21st century. She saw the invention of cars, phones, TVs, planes, computers and lots of other stuff. She has seen more impressive scientific achievements than video games. None of this shit would surprise her anymore.

>>44545778
imagine all the things she could tell you

>>44545688
Didn't know that. Must have been a phase. Either she just thought he was cool or her vanity made her want to be associated with him for more prestige. I’ll have to tease her about that later.

>>44545727
She’s old, but she’s no fool. She’s seen the changes in the world that have happened in her time. She is impressed with human ingenuity, but it’s no magic to her.

>>44546559

>>44545592
I made this a long time ago.

>>44549906
Red and black go so well with Remilia

>>44550601
>>44546559
Long hair remy is a cute.

>>44551067
Remi-sama is adorable!

>>44547184
Lemme tell you, those fangs are sharp…

>>44547430
Based

>>44550601
They really do. I try to encourage her to wear it more.

>>44551067
I also try to encourage her to grow her hair out more, but she’s somewhat set in her ways.

>>44549906
Where did her wings go

>>44553984
so sharp you won't feel anything

>>44554211
Only my love for her. And a little light-headedness from the blood loss.

>>44555483

>>44555902
Remi does get pouty from time to time. Some headpats usually makes her feel better. Some sex always does.

>>44547184
She can bites me anytime with those fangs.

I <3 MY WIFE!

>>44559217
Based haggot

Pretty cute for a vampire.

>>44558988
>>44556618

>>44541689
Are they getting along

>>44559217
Loli hag

>>44564263
Yes, of course, they're sisters. Sometimes they fight like siblings tend to do, but they've been living together for 500 years.

>>44564290
My beautiful loli hag wife, thank you. Any post that talks about her being with Anon in a positive light is me typing from other proxies using Chen in a hamster wheel.

>>44564398
I, too, am enjoying the delusion that I’m married to this bat. She’s such a wonderful waifu.

>>44564447
I dream about Lady Remilia very often.

>>44564578
Sounds nice. I almost never dream and the few I remember have never been about her. I at least have her as my wallpaper on my computer so I see her every day.

>>44564263
Better question is what are their teams? Judging by the linked original Game Boys and the red cartridge label they're probably playing the gen 1 pokemon games against each other.

>>44564447
It's no delusion, Anon. She's my wife and I will break through the barrier of Gensokyo to be with the woman I love, even if I have to abandon my humanity! I reject your reality and substitute my own!

>>44564788
Based. Except for the Adam Savage bit. That guy is a fag.

>>44564634
I have a fumo and a figurine about Lady Remilia.

>>44564879
It's from Dungeonmaster. That fag just copied it. From dream to reality, I'll find her.

>>44564887
Got a figure, fumo, photo, and the 20th anniversary EoSD shounen jump with her on the cover. You are based, as all fellow Remi lovers are.

My pfp on Discord so yeah I pretty much see her every day too.

>>44564966
Good pic

>>44564887
Nice. I really need to get some merch. I don't have much in general, but my complete lack of anything for the woman I love so much feels wrong.

>>44564926
>Its from Dungeonmaster.

Oh wow. I never knew that. Nor heard of this movie before. Very good to know. I cam stop referencing that fag then.

>>44564966
Cute. Does anyone comment on it?

>>44565031
No, mostly because I'm not really active and I don't join public servers either.

>>44565015
Yep, also here's my previous one.

Cute youkai

>>44565226
The cutest. Clearly can’t handle her alcohol though.

>>44554058
You can see them on the low back.

>>44565938
I know it's AI gen, but hot damn is this image good.
I'm surprised that it could handle the directional lighting and shadows as well as it has done.
This one would definitely be a candidate for buing traced over / touched up by a human imo.

>>44569334
It's a shitty image if for no other reason than showing Remilia in direct sunlight with no protection

>>44572660
I want to give an umbrella to poor Remi and then hug her.

how can she be 500 years old yet act like a bratty brat? do youkai never mature mentally?

>>44572660
Never let reality hold you back from something neat anon.

>>44572857
After a period of time they probably just stop giving a fuck and act however they want to act. It's especially easy for that to happen to someone like Remilia who not only was turned at a young age but also presumably lived a privileged life. Her mansion is a small world of its own where she is the queen. I imagine it's very easy to never change or mature in such an environment.

>>44575099
I always thought that since youkai never have parents they don't have anyone to educate nor force them to behave

>>44575194
Maybe for a regular youkai but since she is a vampire and they usually aren't born and have to be made via conversion, I assume she had a human life at some point.

>>44575248
No? Vampires are youkai just like anyone else, if people believe in their existence then they spawn into existence just like regular youkai, they don't have parents

>>44575267
Is that how Touhou vampires work? In that case I guess she just spawned in like that since vampires are perceived to be fancy people living in castles and she gained the personality that people typically associate with rich people.

>>44575267
Yes. They spawn in but the entire point of vampirism in real world and in game lore is that it spreads through either "dark magic rituals" like Dracula or through bite/blood conversion. There's even a part in the Touhou lore that talks about people being bitten by the sisters turning into "mindless zombies" that dissipate when they wander into the sun. That's ghouls being turned via saliva infection through the bloodstream. The difference is that from conventional folklore in order to turn a victim you need to drain the body to the point of just before death and then introduce the vampire blood into the body so it can take good and spread like a magical version of a viral strain. Our you can make "dark pacts and wicked sorceries" from other versions from around the world. Or you can be a "wicked" person in life and then die, or you can be born from a mix of vampire/ human parents and then fully embrace the vampire side to transition to full fledged, or you can have green eyes and red hair and then die, or you can be a "witch" or "dabbler in magic" and then die. All of these examples are from both real world lore and in universe. It would take forever to type it all out, so..

>TL;DR- You're both partially correct but it goes deeper than that. Also, it's a "known" fact that Remi can't or won't turn anyone without major struggle.

>>44575389
Touhou made it so that vampires are considered a species of youkai despite not being the case in irl mythology, I guess ZUN just labels most mythical creatures as "youkai" in his work with the exception of fairies, gods and spirits

>>44575396
It's interesting to see how human belief don't just give birth to fantastic creatures but also affect other humans aswell, for example a bunch of superstitious fearful villagers believe that if someone venture too far into that mountain or someplace he'll turn into a youkai, and whoever is going there will undergo that transformation from the sheer belief that the humans hold

>>44575401
"Youkai" is just the catch-all term the Japanese use for anything that's not specifically a non-magical human or Kami/deity, and even the gods, if conditions are met, can become one. Technically everything from aliens to the chupacabra to the Jersey Devil to Paul Bunyan can be considered "youkai" in Japanese, but our word would be "mysterious being/event/apparition". It doesn't really translate well. Also, Bunyan is a Kaiju, but let's not get into that here.

>>44575444
That's why I went into an area of the mountains that's known to be a Youkai hotbed in the hope that I-I mean, went into the mountains to take pictures of nature.

>>44575444
Hot new idea. Get isekai'd into Gensokyo, start and spread a rumor about a youkaification zone, then once the rumor is powerful enough, go there myself to undergo youkaification.

>>44575518
Fuck that, snort some of Eirin's good shit and get them to FEAR you directly by being an absolute insane lunatic.

>>44575444
>>44575518
>>44575551
I guess psychopaths in ancient times had an easy time getting turned into youkai till humans started to realize that they were the danger themselves

>>44575551
You (and by that, I mean me) could also breathe in the mist form of one of the Scarlet sisters to gain immorality. Remilia tells Reimu to not breathe in the mist or she'll live forever and that'd be bad, to which Reimu says to just give her a few more years worth. Now if you'll excuse me I have to figure out a way to huff the Mistress without Sakuya going full tornado blademaid. Already put in my application for the help wanted ad to work at the SDM. Not a fairy, but the interview seemed to go well enough that they offered a personal head butler role to the sisters to help offset the workload that Sakuya and Meiling have to deal with. Said something about a pillow so I assume I'll be over making sure the fairies get the beds made. Wish me luck!

>>44575267
>No? Vampires are youkai just like anyone else, if people believe in their existence then they spawn into existence just like regular youkai, they don't have parents
I think it's reasonable to believe that vampires like Remi and Flan are exceptions to this.
In Remi's official EoSD profile there's this paragraph:
>She is a light eater. In other words, she can drink only a little blood at a time and must leave the rest behind, so the humans off of whom she feeds become a bit anemic, but usually stay alive. Due to that fact, she always fails to increase the number of her kind.
"fails to increase the number of her kind because she doesn't drink enougn blood". To me this suggests that vampires in Touhou do procreate by draining humans of their blood, like they do in most other stories. It's possible that Remi and Flan might have had real human parents and also a "vampire parent".

>>44576343
Also I realize that PMiSS says that their victims become zombies that evaporate in sunlight, but that doesn't necessarily contradict the statements in the EoSD text file. The zombification could be the fate of the vampire victims that didn't get all their blood drained and thus couldn't become full vampires.

>>44576385
>>44576343
Also isn't PMiSS written by Akyuu in-universe and information in it is stated to NOT take precedence over other canon sources? That would mean Remilia's EoSD profile takes precedence either way.

>>44575468
Its crazy how much people here fails to understand that.

What’s remilia’s best spell card

>>44575267
ok my 2 cents, and a try to keep it brief:
Vampires in touhou are in the weird position of being creatures of magic and superstition and at the same time, being creatures with personhood and very developed sense of self, grounded in reality, a soul if you wish

they are the Living kind of creature with sense of taste (the sisters have a sweet tooth, and dislike bitter things like the dandelions), they are not emotional stunted, as in machine like (noticed by rinnosuke un CoLa), they seems to be capable of feeling psysical and emotional pain, they are very capable of stupidity (letting themselves be manipulated, gaining nothing substantial in return, to evade boredom)

being living organism, means that they never "died" and got resurrected as vampires. instead the vampirism is controled magical mutation (maybe in a ritual with "Makai configured" setting)
so yes, if you mate with the scarlet sisters the only thing you get are dhampirs (half-supernatural beings are a thing, like rinnosuke proves with his existence)

>>44577646
And you are correct. Whether they were born human and "made" into vampires later or not is up for speculation, but there is enough evidence to say they were once human with a modicum of degree that slightly outweighs "they poofed into existence as vampires", but then again.....we really can't say or know unless they tell us. As for half breeds, it seems that people fall into two categories: "their womb is undeveloped, barren, and cold" or "fuck yeah they can!".
The thing is, from a folklore perspective dhampir exist, and while it's usually a human female with a vampire male, the opposite has been known to occur in tales, though much more rare than the first example. And most examples seem to end with the child being sick and ethereal while eventually turning on the vampire parent or being shunned by human society.
The weird thing is that for the denizens of Gensokyo, by nature of existence, they are both bound and liberated from human imagination. They used to be directly tied to human preconceived notions about themselves but eventually took on an independent life of their own, even if they're still bound by a need for human belief. The forms changed, the fuel source did not. But if we believe in something strong enough then it can be birthed into existence like the youkai, and later the urban legends. This can also be seen in Reimu and Marisa believing in a tree God that was struck by lightning, then abandoning it and having a hole into the outside world open where Yukari had to patch it.

And I want to mate with Remilia. Even of they "can't" because of "dead womb" or "immaturity", all it would take is belief, and failing that, to have Eirin pull out one of their eggs and fertilize it via IVF.

>>44582636
Vive La Comtesse Écarlate.

>>44564926
>>44564887
Which figure do you have

Ahh, I want to bury my nose up to the bridge in the soft cleft of Remimi's diaper-padded cheeks

>>44591807
Just do us all a favor and go suck start a twelve gauge. One of you fucks show up and the rest of you come out of the woodwork like fucking roaches and shit up the board to the limit.

For everyone else, how do you think the supply line that the SDM has in the Outside World works? She got the chupacabra from our side, and she tells Reimu she has connections, but assuming Tupai came from South America, how would it be set up? Smuggled into the US and shipped to Japan via boat or plane? Did it get carried to Europe and picked up with the same transport stations that the hobs came from? Warp fuckery? What do you all think? And could someone from our side get in touch with the trade route? Do they have cryptid coyotes transporting spooky stuff through the deserts? Chupacabra in a FedEx box or shipping container? AmaZun Prime?

https://files.catbox.moe/2tmp08.jpg

>>44591932
Good question. There is probably a whole business/organization that deals with the procurement and movement of stuff they want/need. It probably doesn't make sense to the average person but maybe it is like No More Heroes Akashic points(particular areas with a really strong paranormal or supernatural presence). They leave stuff in a particular place and the SDM gets it, vice-versa. It is probably pretty lucrative, someone probably gets rich off of it.

>>44593224
So, I mean part of the reason I ask this is curiosity, whereas the other half is me wanting to start a business to get things back and forth from the Outside to Gensokyo and vice versa. And to eventually be able to meet all the residents of the SDM and have my wife show off all the cool things she collected over the decades. Seriously though, how awesome would it be to be a procurement operator that specialized and dealt exclusively with the paranormal? Peak job for someone like me. If any spoopy groups "need a guy" to get you cool things from out of the way places hit me up. No human transport for eating but I can be your Genso Dash and get you all the things you can't get in Gensokyo I'm an unassuming way that won't draw attention. Yukari, you need good alcohol, tea, rare books, and antiques? Let me know.

>>44593224
My question is how does she pay for all that stuff? Is the fortune she is sitting on just that big?

>>44593451
They sell wine using Sakuya's abilities, but anything else is speculation on our part unless I've missed something, and centuries upon centuries of living from all of them collectively.....well, there's no telling what they do. It could be multiple fortunes over their lives, stocks, contracts, investments, whatever.

>>44591807
H-hot!

>>44593451
Elis selling overvalued houses in Hokkai, Ice World and other low-income areas of Makai to youkai who obviously cannot afford them and pooling these high-risk loans into mortage backed securities!
Kurumi buying these MBSs and refinancing them into CDOs, and then refinancing them further into synthetic CDOs filled to the brim with the most bottom of the barrel subprime garbage!
Kurumi getting Remi to rate her dogshit CDOs as triple A despite being essentially worthless!
Vamps making an ungodly amount of money with their illegal business dealings and accidentally crashing economy!

>>44599190
Hey wait a minute...

>>44599190
Nonsense, 'Rumi used the initial money to buy up a military shipyard and fabrication shop in order to produce arms and munitions to conflict regions around the world, making money off of other people's blood.

What, you thought that vampires feeding on blood was meant to be taken literally?
A fool you have been, anon.

>>44599670
Those aircraft carriers aren't free, you know? But don't worry, Elis can set you up with a nice adjustable-rate mortage for that. And you'll no doubt want some sort of insurance on it too. Flandre can help out with that.

>>44593451
I always assumed she was rich

>>44602509
Yeah but even a vast treasure hoard will eventually find itself depleted unless it is added to. Maintenance of a mansion isn't cheap and that's without accounting for paying the live in personnel. Add all the luxury imported goods and the cost gets even higher. Considering she has been living like this for centuries, she had to have had some kind of way to supplement that initial chunk of wealth.

>>44602509
She is, but it's fun to speculate what she does to maintain that wealth instead of just using up a large inheritance for 500 years.

>>44602624
>>44602545
True
Do you think she gives any to flan?

>>44602814
"Here, Flan. Go buy yourself some more money."

>>44602814
Flan might get an allowance but since she's content with living in the basement she doesn't spend much of it.

>>44602814
Flan would ask for some money and Remilia would ask her what she could possibly want that money for.

>>44591932
i speculate that dealing and trading between supernaturals is less about money and more about Influences and intangible things (gensokyo itself works through bartering sistem rather than strictly monetarian)

Accounts can be seized, Assets Liquidated,
Bank money can be embargoed, IP can be traced and devices blocked, all of this spell doom for vampires and others subhumans, because they tecnicaly dont have property rights. the leech fear the taxman more than the Paladin because the first beget the second

>>44603317
Fair enough. I can still work something out with them. And that last part of your post is preddy based.

Remilia's chastity is in danger

>>44444320
Since she is so small and gets her hunger satisfied without killing the human do you think that sometimes she drinks Sakuya's blood?

>>44607940
She wouldn't be able to bite her without potentially turning her into a ghoul, per canon, and it is known that Sakuya is adamant about staying "human", whatever that may mean for someone like her. But it wouldn't be out of the realm of possibility that Sakuya could cut herself and drain what's needed while using her abilities to speed up the recovery process. She can stretch the interior of the mansion in addition to her time powers, so it wouldn't be impossible for her ability to work on her own physical body to self-heal any wound or cut she may get. But this is speculation on my part mixed with the knowledge that Remilia cares for everyone in the mansion, coupled with Sakuya having a large self-preservation sense unless Remilia it her sister were in danger, and then I could see it being more likely to happen as actually "feeding" off of her. But anything that could happen to put the sisters in any real form of danger would have already bodied Sakuya and the rest of the group to even allow such a setup in the first place. But I'm definitely not underestimating Sakuya's or anyone else power levels, either.

>>44607662
Remilia's chastity is in danger because of me.

>>44612729
Beat you to it. We're happily married and she's pregnant with our second child.

>>44612800
How does she even give birth if you are fine with me asking? I imagine her pelvis is too narrow to give birth naturally, right? Is a caesarean section done each time?

>>44613003
It explodes out of her chestburster style and she just reforms.

>>44613003
Because she was human before the turning process she still has the human eggs that all females are born with, just in a suspended state of animation like she is. It's rare for a female vampire to get pregnant per lore but it can happen. Taking into account her fate manipulation, Sakuya's time flow powers, and a great favor from Dr. Yagokoro via late stage IVF mixed with her magical knowledge we do like normal couples do. Then we wait a while, using fate and time control to keep the child stable until Eirin can safely remove it from her body to be born. It's very complicated, but to outside appearances she gets pregnant like normal but due to her being "frozen" in time it takes a few work arounds. Regardless, both mother and child are safe throughout the whole thing from start to finish. I told her it was okay to adopt since she couldn't have one naturally but she's the one who "knew some people" that could help and being a vampire AND a high class lady wouldn't take no for an answer. So changing fate it was.

What does this creature smell like?

>>44613285
Black tea with a slight copper scent on her breath, and her hair and neck smell of rose oil and vanilla. Trust me on this. I know how my wife smells like.

>>44613285
bags of sand

>>44613100
How much can she do with her fate powers?

>>44613843
It's a subtlety thing. Not outright "once upon a time, you died", but more like being in a canoe that's going down the river. The river can be calm or rough, and you only have your paddle. If you let yourself drift you'll get where it takes you, but if you steer you can get to more favorable waters before you reach where the water ends. She can't do it consciously, though. More like she wakes up one morning and decides it'd be great to have some excitement around here, and she subconsciously causes something that's "exciting" to be drawn towards her. Most everyone is in their own canoe with their own paddles but she has a grappling hook she unwittingly tosses to shore to pull something closer or to pull her closer to something/someone, she just can't actively "pick" what it is.
Flan can play pop goes the weasel with everything but it only manifests with something physical like her aiming at your paddle. The issue is, because they're sisters they share the same root ability of it working on a subconscious level, and what I mean by that is that Remi claims it's a blatant ability when it's manipulating fate (luck) and Flan claims she can break your kneecaps (which she most certainly can) when it's mainly on an energy level where the tension is highest.

>>44613843
She can make me fall in love with her.

>>44614771
Fair enough but she's still my wife and the mother to my kids. You have damn fine taste, though. I'll give you that.

How would a in love Rem act like?

>>44444362
you know you can just get good and make a bunch of good threads to push out the generals, if you're not retarded you could easily find a way to have like 6 or more at a time using a different ip
i usually have about 3 threads up at once and i never post generals
also, just learn to lurk in non general threads, the board is slow so expecting every thread to get 50 replies in an hour is stupid, and expecting the catalog to mostly be one off threads is stupid because people like talking in the same threads rather than making new ones

>>44617862
Confident, demanding, and sure of her success. She would not take rejection well.

>>44617862
Very sweet and shy, with a bit of tsun-tsun, however, her orders get misinterpretated by the servants and her desire for a date went almost terminally wrong when she said to Sakuya that she "wanted him over for dinner".

Rem is so classy it's unreal

>>44617862
Constant no-nos, all over the place.

Remi sicilian

>>44624239
we wuz dracula n shieet

>>44624527

>>44506305
What do these 2 talk about ?

>>44625580
The constant struggle of being older sisters who have to run an estate while keeping a younger little gremlin sister from breaking anything and causing more headaches.

>>44625580
I would assume smugtori and the chuuni vampire do a lot less talking and a lot more violence.

>>44626005
To be fair, Remi definitely keeps her distance from Smugtori in the manga, even going so far as to use Sakuya as a shield to hide behind. So, sorry guys but the two of them hanging out like bros on a Saturday night like the fan stories isn't canon. Remi is more likely to stay inside and read the manga in the library and Satori is likely to stay in her room or office fast away from anything that could give her an aneurysm.

>>44634010
My god! Flannibalism!

I love Remi so much. Don't let her thread die, post appreciation pictures! Show us her elegant side, her chuuni side, her soft side, her scuffed side.

>>44637672
Do you have to sleep in the coffin too ?

>>44638201
I won't fit in it with her. But a bigger one is being made that'll hold the two of us. Its technically just enclosing her huge bed with wood so the sunlight can't get in. Now if I can just figure out a way to get ac pumped in and then convince her to let me do it.....

>>44638264
Uuoohh little vampire armpits. I wonder what they smell like.

>>44638836
Vanilla and rose oil mixed with the scent of a female stuck between girl and woman. Heaven.

>>44638836
needs a pedicure

>>44638937
That does sound wonderful. Very fitting for a lady of her stature.

>>44639080
Brb, gonna go huff the Mistress when nobody's watching.

>>44638264
She had it custom made.

>>44639313
As long as she doesn't mind being the little spoon. Her wings may poke me but that's a sacrifice I'm more than willing to accept.

Goodnight, Remi. Sweet dreams.

>>44634518

>>44640965
Flan is so quiet today...

>>44641296
Good. She should stay in her basement where she belongs. I’m only here for her sister.

Cute

>>44643815
With an attitude like that, you'll never be invited for tea by the Mistress. They may have their differences and like personal space but that's for any sibling. They just spend longer times doing their own thing because of the longer lifespan, but they get along just fine and have regular bonding times like a good family should. Keep talking bad about her little sister and you'll be barred from entry or worse.

>>44645216
W-what if I like Flan more though??

>>44645248
Then you should come with us. Remi wanted to take her sister on our honeymoon vacation because she's been cooped up in the basement so long and thought the time outdoors would be good for her. Plus, she's at that age and single. Go talk to her and see how it goes. I'll take Remi and we'll go get restaurant reservations for the four of us and give you some time to yourselves. Good luck.

>>44645378
I mean, I just meant being friends, but this is cool too.
I don't see the harm in humoring the two of them, so long as Sakuya doesn't start taking measurments for plates.
What could possibly go wrong?

>>44645216
I love them both

>>44645497
That's fine, she can always use a friend. I don't think Sakuya would be "too" crazy over it. She was more worried about making sure the restaurant would add truffles to Remi's food while keeping them off of Flan's, considering she dislikes the taste. But the wait time was ridiculous so we compromised and they both seem happy about it.

>>44645548
Big or small love em all, but anything more than a handful is a waste.

>>44645216
Did remi raise her

>>44646150
Sort of? Remi is Flan's guardian, but she's not much older than Flan, so they were probably raised by someone else. Maybe close servants like Sakuya that came before Sakuya.

>>44646236
They have a five year age gap between them, so it really depends on how you look at "raising" her. When they were human, of course their family/servants/guardians took care of them with, I assume Remilia taking the natural role of protective older sister that knows best like all older siblings seem to fall into. Flandre probably had a rebellious phase against Remilia because she's "fully capable of taking care of myself!" Which would lead into Remilia trying, and failing, to show her how wrong she is. At this point their relationship probably devolved into them not speaking to one another for a while before either they started missing one another or something outside their sphere of influence caused the two of them to make amends, culminating with both agreeing that they're both capable but need each other just as much as they need some alone time every now and then.

But the two of them becoming vampires, well, its never stated HOW they became what they are but assuming they were turned together then they had to rely on each other in a world that was hostile to everyone and everything without knowing the how's or why's of what it means to be one. If one was turned separately and then found or, gods forbid, turned the other....it gets more complicated. Nevertheless, I see them both struggling in the beginning of the changes while trying to survive a world where England/france were coming into the Renaissance and even human "girls" had misfortune if they stepped out of line. Not to mention all the wars and political strife they have lived through, even if they didn't actively participate.

In the end, it appears that Remi took an active role in being her "guardian" for better or worse, and they've both grown as sisters and women from what they've been through despite not being able to grow physically.

>>44646331
Remi trying to be protective sound cute

>>44646331
I saw someone claim that no one turned them and since they are youkai they just spawned in like that.

>>44648188
It's kinda both depending on how you look at it. Youkai (all nonhuman beings, apparitions, and mysterious events that aren't directly a kami/god, and if conditions are met they can be, too) are both bound by the belief and imagination of humans, and can have their own lineages. At some point around the Meiji era they were able to separate from the human limitations and take on their own self identities even if they're still bound by the fear/faith dichotomy. The sisters are over 500 years old, from around the beginnings of the Renaissance in England and France. Remilia makes it a point to say she's related to Dracula for brownie points but we, the viewers, know she's lying. To what extent she's lying, we don't know. That time period was known for being heavy in superstition amd occult knowledge, so they may have "poofed" into existence, but they may have come into existence from actually having a family that...."poofed", so to speak. We can say that the description for bloodsucking oni/vampires does state that they sacrifice the ability to grow physically for the ability to live forever*.

So it may be the case that they were human and changed, or they could have come into existence like a collective belief egregore of the people back then, but for me personally, with what is shown, there is enough unspoken or implied "facts" and such to say they have parents, but to what extent their parents were human is left up to speculation.

her feet are too big for her head

>>44649873

Of all the different touhous, why is it this little vampire that makes me want to marry her?

>>44656569
She's got the mansion. She's got the money. She's got the keys to a form of eternal life. What's not to like?

piedi

>>44657287
She's beautiful, well-mannered with a hint of sass, has the energy level of a young girl and the wisdom of a mature woman, eyes like rubies and hair soft as silk, a voice like oiled velvet, and smells of roses and vanilla. She's kind and supportive to her friends and ruthless to her enemies. She has a playful side and holds great value in the little things despite what she may say, and is a wonderful little lady through and through. Even if she was a human, kami, or devil, even if she was dresses in a potato sack or the finest linen the world over, still I would love and treasure her. If you're focused on the mansion or the money, then you've missed what truly makes her special. She may have spent her entire life searching for the most unique and special of people or things, but to me she's the greatest treasure in the world and I love her dearly.

>>44657607
I'm sure the Remi loves all who devote themselves to her greatness