[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/jp/ - Otaku Culture

View post   
  [?]In ghost mode, only threads with non-archived posts will be shown
File: 12 KB, 345x398, copypasta2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386324 No.4386324 [Reply] [Original]

It was a hot summer day and I was in my workout room benching 1200 pounds. My abs were flexing and girls within a 10 mile radius were getting wet. Once I was done with my daily 32 hour workout I called one of the bitches I know, Senjogahara. She is really fucking hot and looks like a supermodel. SO I got into my Lamborghini Gallardo and reved it up to 40,000 RPM (this is an Italian import with special engine system). I got onto the freeway near my house and threw it into 8th gear, I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier. As I was flooring it on the freeway like a badass, Senjogahara called me and said she wanted me to fuck her. So be it.

I came to a full stop from 700 mph in front of her house. These Ferrari's have top notch brakes, you know. So she gets out of the house and walks up to my Bugatti and starts eyeballing my cock. I could tell she was staring at it because when I looked at her I noticed she was looking at my cock. Booya.

Flash forward to like 10 minutes later. My 30 inch cock is going inside of her pussy, hitting them walls. I'm holding her entire body up with my left pinky as I'm fucking her and she has 30,000 orgasms. She looks me in the eyes and she says "harder." V-TEC just kicked in, yo. I blow my load so hard she falls off my cock. There had to have been about two pints of cum everywhere. People say I cum like a pornstar, I wouldn't disagree with them.

I throw her a towel so she can clean herself up then I do a triple backflip into my Maserati and drive home.

>> No.4386328

thats me in the op pic

>> No.4386329
File: 13 KB, 243x251, 1228433620067.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386329

sugoi monogatari, aniki

>> No.4386334

I know this is copypasta but...

>Drive up in a lamborghini
>Leave in a maserati

wat.

>> No.4386342

>>4386334

That's the joke.

>> No.4386344

>>4386334
You left out Ferrari and Bugatti. It's obviously a custom built, all-Italian car. Very nice.

>> No.4386345
File: 17 KB, 300x169, 1253506329604.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386345

>Senjougahara

>> No.4386346

>>4386334
>1200 pounds
>40,000 RPM
>abs making every woman in a 10 mile radius getting wet
>32 hour daily workouts
>600 mph
>breaking sound barrier
>30 inch cock

And of all things, you choose to talk about him leaving in a different car? Really?

>> No.4386361
File: 440 KB, 1056x561, 7509136.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386361

Goddess thread.

>> No.4386385

>I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier.
The speed of sound at sea level is 760mph.

>> No.4386398
File: 38 KB, 214x216, 1252529847571.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386398

>>4386324
>Lamborghinni Gallardo
>Ferrari
Ok, that part got me. I laughed like an idiot.

>> No.4386399

You are suppossed to laugh

>> No.4386407
File: 163 KB, 721x594, sak_zoom.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386407

>> No.4386440

>>4386334
You know, i've seen this copy pasta lots of times, but this is the first time I've actually noticed the different cars.

>> No.4386487
File: 9 KB, 227x579, eppendorf tube.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4386487

Is it wrong if I read rpm and automatically assume he's riding in a centrifuge?

...Now I'm imagining Falcon tube-tan and Eppendorf-tan taking a ride in a centrifuge, with spinning eyes and all after it stops. Too bad they can't even really use the same centrifuge ;_;

And now thinking about it, Falcon tube-tan would have a modest chest (15mL capacity), Eppendorf-tan would be pretty flat (1,5mL capacity. )

By the way, you can build a bomb of sorts with those. Fun.

>> No.4386505

>>4386385
> Implying he would drive at sea level and not in the atmosphere due to his awesomeness.

>> No.4386506

i've seen this a few times now but still laugh each time i read it. it's a little bit funnier when the file name is araragi.jpg rather than copypasta2.jpg, however.

>> No.4386522

the ending always gets me.

best copypasta ever

>> No.4386525

>>4386506
Bakemonogatari would be much improved if Araragi was a modern Baron Münchausen like this guy.

In fact, who cares about modern? Just put the actual Baron in there. When a vampire bit Baron Münchausen, he turned the vampire into a clone of him instead.

>> No.4386623

>>4386525

In fact how about we remove all the parts from Bakemonogatari and replace them with parts from other, better stories?

>>
Reply to thread [?]Don't expect anything heroic. Your post will not be uploaded to the original board.
Name
E-mail
Subject
Comment
Action