/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>42375369
Steal a tank from Nitori and run over your favorite 2hu

how would villagers react if i told them i don't fear youkai but want to fuck them instead?

>>42375369
Snuggle Yukarin, Ran and Akyuu.

>>42375641
They would call you mentally ill and kick you out

>>42375369
I have always wanted to be a courier, and from what I know, the villagers don’t leave the village often and would go as far as to avoid it entirely, right?. I am good at running so I like to Imagine myself moving packages and messages from place to place all across gensokyo, and I really wouldn’t mind that much the risk of dying

>>42375369
Eat at Mystia's izakaya. Ask Chen out. Eat at Mystia's izakaya together.

>>42375369
Beg for a job at Eientei and from there try to bang Tewi (easy) and Reisen (hard)

>>42375369
approach the umbrella
befriend the umbrella
cuddle the umbrella
marry the umbrella

>>42375369
Well, I wish I could become a vampire and fight Remi until she gains my respect, but Reimu would probably fortune teller me before I do any damage to the environment.
Instead I'll find a way into Myouren temple so I can perv on Kyouko.

realistically, i would probably try to find the human village before taking a wrong turn and be eaten by rumia

>>42380275
You pretend that being eaten by rumia is a bad thing

>>42375369
Pray to God and btfo some evil youkai scum with the power of faith.
Then pull a Myouren and save the souls of the good ones.

genuflect

>>42378985
Brother...

>>42375369
Test if reimu can dodge a buckshot round from my remington 870

>>42384328
She will split your skull before your finger will even twitch on the trigger
You know why guns are not very widespread in Gensokyo, although still in use? They're in the bottom half of the dangerous things list there

>>42384351
I'm going to acquaint myself with the bottom half of dangerous things in Gensokyo, if you know what I mean.

>>42384402
My brothers in christ, This dude is on an whole fucking level.

>>42384351
If guns and bombs can btfo the lunarians who btfo'd a youkai invasion then a few pew pews and some grenades can annihilate the youkai

>>42379025
Why is there so little colored pencil Touhou art? It's a beautiful medium and I thought Japs loved them because they have the exoticism of being German

>>42384955
https://www.pixiv.net/en/tags/%E8%89%B2%E9%89%9B%E7%AD%86%20%E6%9D%B1%E6%96%B9

Go to that beautiful sunflower field and set it on fire

I would immediately go and sniff Reimu's feet.

sex with youkai
sex with youkai
sex with youkai

>>42381150
i never said it was a bad thing

Step 1: Go to the human village and get work there to get some money
Step 2: Go to Eientei or wait for Reisen to show up in the village to buy Methamphetamine, Cocaine and Morphine
Step 3: Go to the Genbu ravine and use the rest of my money to signal to the Kappa that I want to trade and hope that they don't extract my Shirikodama, then acquire a general purpose machine gun from them with sufficient ammo
Step 4: Go back to the village to mix up the drugs into one single mixture
Step 5: Leave the village, cock the gun and inject the drug mixture into my carotid artery
Step 6: ???
Step 7: Profit!

>>42375369
Real answer: I'd go and study under Taishi-sama.

>>42379025
Don't forget the most important part:
Make a family with the umbrella

>>42375369
Immediately pledge allegiance to the one true God of snake sex

>>42384955
There's a shit ton of Danbooru dude.

>>42385396
You had better ask the miko about the fees for that beforehand.

Immediately attempt to fire a fucking laser out of thin air
If it doesn't work, go on a quest to make my dream real
I don't care how many must die, I will fire mah lazer whenever and however I please

swear allegiance to Yukari. 99% of youkai too scared to fuck with me. Have happy life with the Yakumo family

Start doing weird creepy shit until i go crazy and/or become a yokai. I know that the villagers aren't allowed to become yokai but maybe i will be ignored because I'm an outsider

>>42375369
find a way to create sprite through alchemy and become the soda yokai of legend

>>42402835
Just don't go to the village and avoid meeting Reimu as a human, she has no way to know

>>42401329
>swear allegiance to Yukari
that's a fancy way of saying "consenting to being yukari's meal"

>>42375369
sex

I would ask Meiling to teach me

>>42375369
Befriend Junky and Hecc by telling them I also hate lunarians

>>42375369
Immediately attempt to find Reimu and be sent back. She would get the idea even without me knowing Japanese

>>42384979
Woah.

>>42405125
Instructions unclear, you have been sent to the tengu mountain for education

>>42405125
>don't know the local language
>don't know the local geography besides names of locations
>incapable of using danmaku
>have no magic powers or especial physical prowess to speak of
telling that all of you just handwave these problems away. i genuinely hope you end up in gensokyo just so you can swiftly die to the youkai you love to jack off to

>>42405271
eh it'll be fine

>>42405271
I'll just punch them in the face and it'll all work out in the end.

>>42405271
I'll just jack off to them then

>>42405271
There is nothing that can stop the autistic gestalt of my metaphysical being from ripping a hole in reality and fucking off once I am free of my flesh prison, the rest is just details and not a concern. You cannot convince me otherwise, it is just a matter of time

>>42375369
To be honest I'd trust yukari more than anyone else there

>>42375369
pray to kanako i'll get out of all the troubles alive

>>42384351
isn't it just because yokai would just heal from whatever gunshot wound you inflicted?

>>42402835
just become a magician, literally the only difference between them and humans is no aging or starving, so it's probably legal. probably.

>>42384866
That has never happened though, and the Lunarians would totally wipe out the Earth if they wanted to, they can make fans that atomize whole forests with a wave, Earth wouldn't stand a chance. They just haven't because they only want to be left alone.

Need I remind you a single Oni alone like Suika is already strong enough to BTFO the whole US military by herself? Youkai would also eradicate the modern world.

>>42375369
Kill and ear fairies until I get powers then keep eat stronger and stronger things until I'm about grass roots level of power then chill

>>42412579
But the humans were winning in the second lunar war?

>>42412579
you say that but by the time of the 2060ish the USA was BTFOing lunar bitches in combat on their home turf

>>42412579
>Need I remind you a single Oni alone like Suika is already strong enough to BTFO the whole US military by herself? Youkai would also eradicate the modern world.
my man they die if they leave the barrier. Youkai ain't shit

>>42412596
>>42412599
You know the Moon you see is not the Moon the Lunarians live in, right? Humans literally cannot touch the True Moon and even if they could, merely being able to look at the Lunarian's dimension would drive them to instant insanity.
Ergo, humans still aren't shit to the Lunarians even in the future and there's nothing known about this war beyond the fact that it started, so for all we know all humans did was go get their asses kicked or the Lunarians had some mercy since humans can't touch them anyway.

>>42412629
except what he posted literally disproved you on all points

>>42412629
>"We've decided to declare a final war against them. The tide of the war is currently slightly in their favour... Their modern weaponry is far better than we expected."
IDK bro doesn't sound like the humans are getting their asses kicked. And aren't you forgetting all the limitations and weaknesses Lunarians have due to their special nature of existence? Lunarians can't even touch the actual surface of the Moon due to impurity shenanigans.

>>42412632
No it didn't. Cope earthling.

>>42412639
>slightly
So nothing about the Lunarians getting BTFO like was claimed then? Cool, I accept your concession.

>>42412647
>Cope
You talk like a faggot and smell like one too
back to discord with you, nigger

>>42412651
Shut the fuck earth slime. Being racist doesn't make you a winner.

>>42412657
Yes, in fact it does

>>42412647
>>42412657
Yuugi Hoshiguma can beat up your princesses with a single punch, lunarfag

>>42412662
Wrong.

>>42412664
Wrong.

>>42375369
Burry myself alive and hope a whimsical creature doesn't find me

>>42412596
>Living in houses built out of wood that will never weather away, blessed by nature, quietly playing shogi after finishing our standardized tasks... Is that not the lifestyle humans desire once their technology becomes sufficiently advanced in the far future?
...No? Was this Kaguya (ZUN) projecting their hopes for the future onto everyone else? Quite a lot of people have different ideas on what they want to do with advanced technology, and living a quiet life with it is usually an unpopular choice.

>>42412672
1+ carrots have been deposited into your account.

>>42412677
Rin Kaenbyou will find you

>>42412697
Holy shit I fucking LOVE carrots oh my gods oh

>>42412690
>living a quiet life with it is usually an unpopular choice.
Yeah i'm sure everyone wants to believe they'll become a superhero or activist or someshit. At the end of it though everyones gonna use it to hang out and enjoy life rather then change things except the handful that have the drive to do so

>>42412579
>>42412629
>>42412647
Lunarian cope. We're returning to the moon and we're gonna beat the shit out of you when we arrive. Your days are numbered moonie scum

Lunarians? funny way to spell red mist

>>42412765
>>42412776
You'll be dead in 40 years. I'll be dead in never.
You retarded humans are going to extinguish each other with a thermonuclear war before you ever have a hope of reaching the moon again and being able to set foot on it for longer than what your oxygen tanks allow.

realistically, how would youkai react if you said you found them hot

>>42412827
>Artemis 3 (officially Artemis III) is planned as the first crewed Moon landing mission of the Artemis program and the first crewed flight of the Starship HLS lander. Scheduled for launch in 2025, Artemis 3 is planned to be the second crewed Artemis mission and the first crewed lunar landing since Apollo 17 in 1972.
>The Lunar Gateway, or simply Gateway, is the first planned extraterrestrial space station in lunar orbit. The project is expected to play a major role in NASA's Artemis program, after 2024.
Your. Days. Are. Numbered.

>>42412849
disgusted that the food thinks its opinion matters

>>42412849
all youkai are entirely innocent and don't know what sex is so they'd be confused

>>42412863
more like weirded out that their prey masturbates to their predators

>>42412855
We can't wait to shoot it down.

*ahem*
National Aeronautics and Space Administration 航空宇宙局 John F. Kennedy the Space Race 宇宙開発競争 the Apollo Space Program Nikita Khrushchev Lyndon B. Johnson Apollo 11 アポロ宇宙計画 アポロ11号 Michael Collins Cape Canaveral the Eagle Lunar Module 鷲 Buzz Aldrin the Eagle has landed 人への小さな一歩 Neil Armstrong the United States of America アメリカ合衆国 Death Impurity Life 死 不純

>>42413684
This kills the Lunarian.

>>42413684
wtf anon you just got all lunarians itt arrested and their internet shut down!
good job