/jp/ - Otaku Culture

I can imagine Keine pulling her "Just as planned" troll face

I fucking hope Mitsumoto will have happy end for Mokou and Mystia.

Mysti-chan...;_;

You do know that is both gay and bestiality right?

そうだおね...
妹紅さんは
人間...

私みたいな
妖怪なんか...

それなのに
私...

ひとりで
舞い上がってて...

馬鹿みたい...

>>3809181
Thanks, I really should know all these by now but I do not.

Mystia... ;_;

>>3809134
>>3809181
Mystia's break down speech translated:

But of course...
Mokou is a human...

I'm just a Youkai
no matter how you look...

And yet...
I get all carried away with this
by myself...

What an idiot...

These are already translated on Danbooru.

Got a problem with me with Mokou? Mystia?

>Mokou is a human...

Let's all think for one second

>>3809238
Youkai of immortality!

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

KEINEEEEEEEEEEEE

Funny that this Keine is how the artist sees her, not the modest honest straight face Keine that we all know.

>>3809270

I only know moo-cow Keine.

>>3809283
moo moo moo moo moo mooooooo

Cripple hand Keine is the real Keine.
She has to use a hook to help her pick things up in her daily life.
When her teach, her students always get distracted by her hand.

>>3809307
>>3809304

Keines should not be teaching our children.

Keines are for eating and breeding.

For some reason, Keine is good friends with Satori.

>modest honest straight face Keine that we all know

... who?

>>3809335
She does that for the good of the children....

>>3809345


And that's why cows should not teach children.

Cows are not for having sex with, either. That's bestiality.

>>3809351

Keine isn't a cow, though. She is the Great and Wise Hakutaku.
And what the Great and Wise Hakutaku wants, the Great and Wise Hakutaku gets.

>>3809307
>>3809330
One with arm joint but no fingers.
The other with fingers but no joint.
I think they'd make a brilliant team.

>>3809383

So she's a magic talking cow.

That won't make her any harder to spit-roast over a fire, I daresay.

>>3809399
Why are you such a Touhou vore fanatic?

>>3809412

When eight hundred years YOU reach, hungry you will be, too. Hm hm...

Keine or Mystia. Mokou has two good choices. I probably couldn't choose myself.

>>3809399
>>3809412
Disturbing and retarded fetish.

I HUNGER FOR THE FLESH OF THE LIVING

FUCK.

SHIT MAN.

FUCK I AM TIRED OF THIS SHIT.
STARVATION IS A TERRIBLE THING.

>>3809399

Actually she's some sort of big green, lion-like thing with hooves and horns, eyes all over and a big fluffy tail. Or something along those lines, at least...

... maybe "cow" is more comprehensive.

>>3809436
So that means footjobs and coming on her are out of the question.

GREEN KEINE NEEDS FOOD BADLY

>>3809436
>>3809457

Hence why I said you'd be much better off making stew out of her. I'm sure that since she can talk, she could also confer some recipes for cooking Bai Ze.

>>3809457

There's a tricky part to that, you see. She has both hooves and claws, at the same time. And at the same time that she has both, she has neither. Them mythical animals can be pretty damn confusing sometimes.

Somehow I don't think whoever wrote down the descriptions of these mythical animals were expecting people 3000 years later to attempt having sex with them.

>>3809477

Pretty sure that you could use the standard recipe for hamburgers and chuck steak with a Bai Ze, though. Beef is beef, and vice-versa.

>>3809477
Hell I'm shocked more haven't thought it out back then, I mean deviants were everywhere back in those times.
All the stories of Gods coming down and fucking mortals, trying to nail a mythical beast would have been par for the course.

>>3809487
Would you knock it off with the Vore fetish? No one wants it.

>>3809493

Too bad for THEM, whoever they are. I couldn't care less about them, I'm hungry.

>>3809504
Maybe you wouldn't be so hungry if you weren't high all the time.

WIT A BODY FULL O' EYEBALLS

Anyone who wouldn't choose Mystia is a terrible, horrible person.

If you want to simulate nights with Keine, just find a bowling pin, carve it to a point, and enjoy.

It is impossible, however, to simulate the feeling of a beautiful night sparrow laying next to you.

Mystia, so awesome.

>>3809504

... I thought your fetish was Keine sprouting manmilk-depositing parts under the full moon?
Have I truly been mistaken for so long?

>>3809525

To be quite honest, I'm not sexually aroused at the thought of eating Keine. I'm just hungry.

It would be quite beyond the pale if I were to start being aroused by my -food-. And besides, the Touhous constantly threaten to eat each other in the games. I'm only playing along.

Why is Keine so sexy?

I hate both/all of you.

Also, Keine is only a cow once a month so eating her is like 97% cannibalistic. Or something.

>>3809541

Yeah, but that's usually only if they're maids with similarities to dogs, or if they have folk beliefs surrounding the culinary uses for their liver.

Actually, I'd say Keine once a month Keine would be more likely to eat you.

>>3809566
What the fuck man, you eat only meat? That can't be healthy!

>>3809512
Spend night with known Human eating Youkai.
Become her breakfast in the morning.

or

Kind hearted beast Woman who protects humans and is a rampant sex hound on Full Moons.
Tough call.

>>3809578
what

>>3809581

She neither could nor would eat Mokou. And Keine is boring 29 days of the month, and a cow the other.

>>3809573

>Actually, I'd say Keine once a month Keine would be more likely to eat you.

Well, then, I'd better beat her to the punch and have her butchered up nicely into steaks.

And that other Anon was actually convincing me to stay my hand. Ha ha, he didn't even consider that she would do the same thing to ME if she had a chance. You can't trust cows. Especially magical, talking, meat-eating cows.

>>3809630
Can I have one of the steaks once you get around to it? It would be a most interesting flavor, I'm sure.

>>3809630
This is the exact argument I use when confronted by haughty vegetarians and those PETA assholes for eating meat.

>>3809630

... may I most humbly suggest the underworld queen goes and gets a burger, so maybe her head will start working properly again.

>>3809647

How's about I give you a calf instead?

Then you can raise your own magical cow, butcher her, and eat her all for yourself.
I plan on securing some of Keine's offspring so that when she's dead there's still going to be hakutaku wandering around.

You did not think I'd kill the goose that laid golden eggs without some forethought, did you?

>>3809665

I am about to do just that because I haven't eaten a single thing the entire day since breakfast.

Hence, my preoccupation with dinner.

Well, it's been a while.

>>3809670

Wouldn't count on Keine's children becoming hakutaku, though. She was originally human, and most of the month she still is, more or less. Her children would likely be regular humans, maybe with some special talent as is the custom, but that's it.

From what I gather, it may even be that there is never more than one hakutaku, and that another only shows up when the previous dies.

Mystia makes people go blind in the forest at night, then she either:

1. Eats them herself.
2. Let them fall off a cliff or eaten by other Youkai/animals because they can't see.
3. Commit fraud by making them by her useless lamprey and lying about it having fixed the blindness.

Mystia is not cool, it's time you realise that people.

>>3809796
Thanks. I'm not sorry for her in the OP's post anymore.

On the other hand, Keine protects and educates humans.
Mokou helps guide lost humans back to safey from the bamboo forest.
They deserve each other.