/jp/ - Otaku Culture

tl;dr: I am attempting to baselessly build my sexual self esteem while inviting others to do so.

>>2457248
Protip: Eroge scenes are not good reference material for petting and foreplay, much less lovemaking.

Also, anon is one freaky dude. Few girls would be able, or capable of, satisfying him.

Technically even a retard with downs can fuck. I know because I've seen the videos. Maybe.

But seriously the only thing Anon has to worry about is losing steam. He isn't no marathon runner or not even a half mile runner, so he might get tired out pretty quickly. No all night long love making sessions from him.

This is all based off theory though. In the end I know nothing about about putting my penis into a vagina.

>>2457262
That's what cuddling and taking turns is good for. It gives you time to rest a bit.

>>2457262

Hey, you know how you can lose weight fast?

By f-f-f-fuckin' a lot!

>No all night long love making sessions from him
I donno about you but I sometimes I fap for a hour, approaching orgasm several times before actually cumming. I think that's decently long.

Of course if you have a yandere waifu and she forces you into a chair and grind against you relentlessly, that might be a bit different to fapping.

>>2457281
Arcueid knows the deal.

Arcueid show em the tapes of you and Shiki fucking so we can learn how it's done.

>>2457255
are you saying it's bad to try and raise my self-esteem even if it's baseless?

if so, you got issues.

>>2457281
>>2457313

Yeah, about that...
Isn't having a hymen which "tears like paper" (which IRL only occurs as a severe malformity) slightly inconvenient when you naturally regenerate from being parted in 20?

Tsukihime was good, but the h-scenes had me laughing.

>>2457284
I went for four hours once, using the same method.

Holy mother of FUCK that was a good orgasm.

>Protip: Eroge scenes are not good reference material for petting and foreplay, much less lovemaking.

Goddamnit, are you serious?
My life is based on a complete lie...Ah well, wasn't planning on using those 'skills' anyway.

>>2457284

Oh yeah, I can last as long as I want for fapping. I think we're all pros at that though.

Sometimes I think that "sexual intercouse" thing might be interesting, especially if you learn how to last forever. Can probably really make the girl moan like crazy as you fuck her brains out. Might be fun to hear her squeals as you use your magic fingers and tongue on her until she comes.

But in the end we all know that all this stuff probably isn't worth it. Since you gotta, you know, find a nice girl to do this crazy stuff with. In the end, 2D is fine for me.

>>2457330
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I find that the semen that comes out of those hour long fapping session is different to normal semen. The normal ones are cloudy and viscous, where as the long fap semen is clear and watery.

Not that i'm complaining, you cum like three times the normal amount and those orgasms are so pleasurable that they're actually painful

>>2457344

I've become so good at fapping that the real deal is probably obsolete. I assume that after letting the girl have about 4 orgasms I'll just have to finish myself.

At least...that's what I keep telling myself

Eroge scenes are only good for sex positions, and even then, only when tempered with some common sense as to what will actually work and what would be uncomfortable.

But, ronery shutins as we are, I have little doubt many/most here have read about sex enough to help them. Learning about the ways females masturbate can especially help.

And, of course, there is the fact that everyone is different and that's something that can only really be learned with experience. Some girls may find ear nivvling painful, others are incredibly turned on by it. Some melt like butter when being groped, others haven't as much sensitivity in their breasts. Some prefer faster foreplay, others prefer slow, teasing foreplay, etc, etc, etc.

Protip: Your first sexual intercourse is, according to anyone who ever has spoken on on the subject, your absolutely worse.
Those years of fapping and hyping it always result in overhyping it, or so they say.

I'm good at not overhyping stuff, so I dunno if that'll happen to me.
Not that it's all that important.

>>2457373
It isn't so much overhyping as a sudden change in feeling. Instead of concentrating on some porn while gripping yourself with a hand, you have a thinking person on top/below you, and a whole new feeling around your dick.

Also it is far from unanimous that it's the worst. Some find that, especially if it's both their first times, that it's a really emotional and loving moment.

Making a girl have an orgasm is a better feeling than sex itself, in a different way of course

>>2457383
No, not really.

>>2457383
Agreed Please don't kill me guys, I DO predate the internet

>>2457396
Get on your knees before apologizing.

>>2457382

>Some find that, especially if it's both their first times, that it's a really emotional and loving moment.

An exceedingly rare occurrence in the developed first worlds, unless you're a young teenager.

>>2457260
>Also, anon is one freaky dude. Few girls would be able, or capable of, satisfying him.
This is the sad thing. The very first few times he might be accepting of ordinary sex, but quickly he'll be wanting to throw in bondage and lolis. Three months into the relationship, she's kept in a box in his basement and he's bored with her.

>>2457405
orz

>>2457435
I doubt anon sex would end like that. More like anonymous always do it in the missionary position with his waifu to pretend to be a normalfag.

And when the waifu snoops around and see a 500gb sfv file on his computer, he would feign ignorence regarding True Crypt rather than share with her his passions.

>Learning about the ways females masturbate can especially help

Speaking of that, does /jp/ know anything about this? Japan would have me believe girls masturbate by flicking their nipple and clit then suddenly jamming two fingers into their vagOO while crying "Ahh! You too oniichan. Together... Cum together with Nagisa!". But I thought sticking things in the vagOO provides very little stimulation?

>Japan would have me believe girls masturbate by flicking their nipple and clit then suddenly jamming two fingers into their vagOO while crying "Ahh! You too oniichan. Together... Cum together with Nagisa!".
So...that's not how it really goes?

...
they don't scream "Onii-chan" during sex?


wtf

It doesn't matter how good I get at it, I would never be able to satisfy a girl. I only do anal sex. As the receiver.;_;

>>2457782
Get a double-ended dildo and you're golden.

>>2457782
Trap could be a good partner for you.

>>2457673

If you don't want to crawl the web looking for information, I recommend the book "She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman".

I've had sex (in b4 "lies") and it was crap. So I know what I'm missing and don't miss it.

>>2457787
I don't really see those working too well on satisfying the female.
>>2457794
From my understanding, most traps prefer to be on the receiving side.

>>2457817
http://www.fulldls.com/torrent-ebooks-881638.html

For the poorfags among us

>>2457853
>I don't really see those working too well on satisfying the female.

Newer designs are made to give her plenty of pleasure. Instead of an I-shape, they're made in a J-shape. The short part goes inside her and the longer part goes inside you.

>>2457864
Infected

>>2457864
Cool virus, homo mcfagmo pants.

>>2457868
Hm, I've heard of those. I guess I'd give it a try if I could ever solve the two other problems, finding a waifu and preventing her from dumping me for being a faggot.

>From my understanding, most traps prefer to be on the receiving side.

That's likely to be true. I know two traps, should ask them.

>>2457864

Or you could have posted the Rapidshit.

rapidshare.com/files/31201969/Ian_Kerner_-_She_Comes_First.rar

>TLDR: anonymous would make his waifu very happy in bed
With diapers, hooray.

I finish in about 10 seconds, so no.

Yes. I agree with OP.

Besides, us here on /jp/ have enough second-hand experience with sex, via eroge, to shame most 19/20 year old 'normal' people. Theoretically it's all perfect.

sure, if the female in question looks past the acne, fat, deformed face and small penis

I remember Ron Jeremy once said he could give more pleasure with his mouth than he could ever give with his penis.
That being said I highly doubt shut ins like us would ever have the chance to have sex, and even then we would be scared and confused.
There is no way around it.

>>2458517
Thanks, Cap'n Obvious.
Don't know what I'd do without you.

>>2458523
Some of us had something akin to an ordinary life once. We may be hopeless now, but we weren't necessarily ALWAYS hopeless.

1. Go see a dermatologist and sort your skin out
2. http://www.liamrosen.com/fitness.html
3. Stop wearing horrible clothes
4. ???
5. Girls

After reading much of Nasu's works, I feel confident I can please any woman!

So, by this logic, I'm also a brilliant tactician, an invincible robot pilot, an expert sniper, and the greatest gladiator ever lived.

>>2458517
I am not fat.

>>2458553
skinnyfat is still fat

>>2458551
Is this awesome?

[ ] Yes
[ ] No

>>2458549
You forgot the part about leaving the house once in a while.

>>2458549
Don't ask how, but I managed to skip straight to 5.
I am now married. Go figure.

>>2458557
I'm not skinny, I'm just average.

>>2458540
You honestly believe you'd be confident if you ever had sex?
I'd be so scared and confused that it'd be embarrassing.

>>2458571
I had a flesh-and-blood wife once.

Eroge/doujin/hentai have been a pretty great resource for sex.

Me and my girlfriend browse them together looking for new positions to try, in addition to using them for fapping/shlicking material.

I still have no endurance at all, though.

>>2458571
You piss in your pants so your opinions are void.

>>2458551
That's actually quite doable for the general population here if we overlook a few things:
>brilliant tactician
Overlook the fact that no one would put an army on our hands considering who we are.
>invincible robot pilot
Overlook the technology gap and you'll have an "experienced" pilot with superior knowledge and reflexes.
>expert sniper
Overlook the fact that while we're brimming with military and tactical knowledge, plus a patience for boring tasks, most of us will not have an acceptable physical training and endurance
>greatest gladiator ever lived.
Overlook the fact that it's now a crime to do so unless you're doing it on the minorities and once again the physical background, our anatomy knowledge, quick reflexes and tactical superiority could make this true.

Once again, it's all about overlooking.

>>2458571
It's one of those things anyone can argue against by saying "hurr you don't know anything about it since you haven't tried yet", but I doubt it's as bad as some people say. I'm not commonly scared in unknown situations, so I don't see why sex should be an exception. Of course, I wouldn't be a complete sexpert or anything, but it's not like she'll cut off your penis if you don't do well.

>>2458571
Nobody expects much from first-timers; it's just live-ammo practice.

You'd be surprised how much embarrassment melts away when you're feeling humiliated, but your partner is still smiling anyway. Besides, we're all relatively young, even if we don't do that well the first time, might as well make it a double-header.

>>2458597
If she does that all you have to do is cut hers off.

>>2458540
I miss my 3d girlfriend. I loved teasing her to the point she wanted to yandere rape me. ;_;

>>2458598
Naturally, the penis cutting off will occur no matter what the outcome.

>>2458598
I imagine it being hard for your partner to hear "This is my first time" when you're aged 18 or older. It'd probably be funny enough for them to laugh at you.
At least that would weed out people who truly liked you and people who truly don't.

>>2458577
I don't piss my pants.

You know that thing, that says that women like jerks.
Well, there's limits to that.
If you're just a horrible asshole who really loves being mean to people, it won't turn out well.
But being a villain is so much better than those pathetic bad boys.
Why feast off pleasure when you can get off people's pain ?

>>2458623
Only sluts care about that .....right?!

>>2458623
Well, on that front, there are a lot of bad lovers out there who still make out okay in the belt-notch department, so in theory, you could get away with not saying anything.

Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if she'd simply give in on hearing it's your first time anyway. naturally folk like us probably won't do the "sex on the first date" routine, so there will be some time to work in that news anyway.

also, two more things--
This is anecdotal, of course, but I've never heard of anyone walking out on someone because it's the other person's first time.

>>2458648
>two more things
Hurrr~
I sure can count.

>>2458626
I've always wanted to be one of those lawful evil types who act well-mannered and sophisticated to hide their villainous intentions, but I'm a true neutral at heart and too introverted to be manipulative.

>>2458655
Well, people often think I hate them, but I wouldn't actually bother being an asshole to people I don't care about.
But I love to stalk people and learn their dirty little secrets, because it's empowering.

Brotip: If a girl dumps you or wont go out with you, say this-
"Truly there are beauties in this world a man was not meant to possess".

I guarantee it will make them reconsider (or at least feel awful)

A decent discussion thread on /jp/ and, of all things its about sex.

>>2457914
pw plz

>>2458682
Nah, she'll just say "Go tell that to the guy who rammed my ass sore yesterday."

>>2458682
that's something cwc would say

>>2458655
I love that moment.... That supreme moment when a subtle manipulation bears perfect fruit....

I love being able to watch someone for a few minutes to pick up clues on how they'll respond to specific events...

>>2458682
This is what happened the last time someone took relationship advice from 4chan.

>>2458719
If you couldn't tell that was a bad idea to start with, you got what was coming to you.

Life ain't a fucking soap opera; no matter how badly a woman desires to get raped deep in her heart, self-defense out of fear is automatic.

You can't just pin someone's hand and assume they'll think you're completely unsuspicious.

>>2458719
Also, there's no such thing as a dramatic pause in real life. Remember that, and you'll avoid trying to cause them.

And finally, I pray at least your FAMILY is male-dominated, because western culture in general sure ain't; which is why she fought back. You had to get the crazy idea that 3D women don't fight back from somewhere....If it's not that, we might have to have the "Fiction isn't real" conversation again
Don't you dare try to blame anybody else here but yourself.

>>2458745
>>2458734
That wasn't me.
It was a screencap from a /v/ thread.

>>2458623
If she loves you she won't care.

Quake Voice:
HUMILIATION!!!

I'm barely even attracted to women in the 3D world anymore, so I doubt I could (or would ever want to) "satisfy" one of them. I would rather die a virgin than spend all of my money on some slut just so that I can use her vagina every once in a while.

>>2458749
>/v/ thread

Get out of /jp/.

>>2458713
Is it wrong to be Lawful Evil, but still do good because it makes me feel superior to the rest?
Say, someone wouldn't help out an annoying woman with a smile. I do. For the sense of superiority.

Lawful Neutral. Might not give a fuck about you, but I'll help you out. For my own satisfaction.

>>2458577
He pisses his bed actually. We have no way of knowing whether or not he wears his pants in bed though.

>>2458719

This would work under the following circumstances:

-You've known the girl for longer than a damn week (like that suggested).
-It was after a tense moment, not like "See you later".
-She isn't a "liberated women" whore, which makes up more than half of the west these days.

>>2458799
In NO way would this work. If I got that pulled on me I'd be pretty creeped out.

>>2458780
>but I'll help you out. For my own satisfaction.
Everyone does that with or without knowing, in a more or less abstract way.

>>2458804
Also forgot my trip because e-peen

>>2458803
That's why you blush and look away.

>>2458803
thanks for planting the image of two guys doing that in my head

>>2458749
Man, I wasted all that text for nothing.
You probably already knew better to start with.

>>2458799
the part he did wrong is he didn't make it obvious that he was just being assertive and in love. He behaved like he was annoyed and his rapist rage was ignited. Of course the girl will fight back.
just say ore wa omae no goto suki and it will work for sure!

>>2458810
Don't mention it!

>>2458817
Don't forget to stutter mercilessly on the 好

>>2458825
S-s-s-s-suki?!

>>2458826
tsuki tsuki, tsuki tsuki!

>>2458831
kimochi...ii...

>>2458803
But it worked for me. Without realizing it.
I just got up to her all casual like, and said hello smiling.
She blushed and looked away. She whispered "Oh, anonymous..."
Actually, it sounds better with my name. Which is exotic and awesome.
Wish I had done something then.

Where did that suave guy go? Now I'm all Lawful Evil and shit.

This is a good thread.

>>I've never heard of anyone walking out on someone because it's the other person's first time.

I doubt anyone who got rejected like that would be telling too many other people about it. On the other hand, do you know a lot of people who have lost their virginity when they were, say, 20 or older?

>>2458838
You can be Lawful Evil and make people fear you because of your superior wits and power.

>>2458902
20 here. ;_;

>>2458932
Not the oldest virgin on /jp/, by far.

>>2458902
I do actually. Being an Indian and all. Conservative values.
And I've got the whole Arranged Marriage thing on my side. All I need to do is get a good job and I get a free wife. But yeah... a waifu is unlikely.

>>2458902
I had a few friends from highschool who were....late-bloomers.

Tom found his by basically developing a drinking habit, Jack bought a hooker on his 21st birthday, and D...... you guys will like this-- D earned himself his first notch to a 15 year old girl from the internet at the fresh young age of 27, last summer.


so there's some hope for you imouto lovers

>>2458954
>Not the oldest virgin on /jp/, by far.

If I only was still a virgin.

DOHOHO

>>2457248

lol, seeing her malicious grin and sobbing shrine maiden, I could only imagine what sadistic horrors she unleashed on the that poor crying zombie....

>>2458965
15 is too old, tho.
And really slutty, too
.

>D earned himself his first notch to a 15 year old girl from the internet at the fresh young age of 27, last summer.

that's cool, did the girl know it was his first? Because I always imagined little girls would look for experience in an older man. An older man with no experience would sound meh if I was the little girl.

>>2458970

What's the worst a lesbian lover could do?

Scissor you roughly?

(If toy's are negligible of course.....)

>>2458902

I'm 25 and I'm still a virgin. I've had opportunities, but never from the ones that I want. And I have high standards so there aren't many that I want out there.

>>2458983
Fisting.

>>2459004

oh lawd....

>>2458995
Well, lucky for you.
I've grown attracted to people I don't even find attractive to begin with.
My brain has been fucked thanks to staying with those people for so long.
Nowadays, I'm ashamed of myself whenever I'm exposed to that slut.

>>2458965

I had an opportunity with a 14 year old on the internet who fell in love with me through an MMO, but I didn't want to go to outside or go to jail, so I am still here getting nothing significant done in life.

;_;