/jp/ - Otaku Culture

You're a copypasta level faggot that should go back to /a/.

Kakkoii monogatari aniki.

Fascinating.

>>2070488

You're a 4chan level otaku, you say? Hrmph. I am a 2channel level otaku, and you are as far beneath me as narutards are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your torrents? My satellite dish is pulling down the latest shows while they air from motherfucking SPACE. By the time you even see the OP I've already fapped and smoked a cigarette. And the latest moeblob you fell in love with this season? Three years ago I played the game the show's based, got the secret harem ending, and came on her face. And her friends' faces. All at the same time. Twice. You keep waiting for your precious torrents. I'll be standing in line at Comiket, getting the real deal from the artist himself.

>>2070511
You're a 2channel level otaku, you say? Hrmph. I am a mangaka level otaku, and you are as far beneath me as 4chan level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your bookstores? My pen is dishing out the latest stories while I think them up with my BRAIN. By the time you even crack the binding I've already signed a contract for the next one. And that h-game you played three years ago? I made my wife dress up as the lead and had sex with her for inspiration when I co-wrote it. I still have the manuscript for the bondage scene you'll never see. You keep waiting for your precious bookdealers. I'll be sitting in my studio apartment, making the real deal with my own hands.

Fascinating.

>>2070511
>2ch
>otaku

Facinanicaf.

>>2070518

You're a mangaka level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am a corporate bureaucrat, and you're as far beneath me as 2channel level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your new volume? I'm the one who makes it popular with my propaganda and viral marketing. By the time you even pick up that pen I've already contracted a better author. And that h-game you made last year after dressing up your lovedoll for inspiration? I was fucking a girl more beautiful than you could ever even hope to talk to. I still have the new serialization contracts you'll never see. You keep writing your silly books. I'll be sitting in my mansion, counting up all the money you've made

>>2070525
You're a corporate bureaucrat level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am a politician, and you're as far beneath me as mangaka level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your viral marketing? I'm the one who makes it possible with my pork barrel spending and hedge funds. By the time you even call an author I've already secured subsidies for "the arts". And that girl you were fucking? I was fucking over more voters than you could ever even hope to talk to. I still have the new anti-abortion bill you'll never see. You keep counting your silly money. I'll be sitting in my office, assfucking my secretary.

>>2070488
fantastic

>>2070525
You're a corporate bureaucrat, you say? Hrmph, I'm Rumiko Takahashi, and you're as far beneath me as mangaka level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your viral marketing and propaganda? I'm the cornerstone of that very market segment. By the time you even sign that contract at noon, I've already had >9000 fans plead me for the next chapter of Inuyasha. You can keep sitting in your mansion counting up all the money you made. I'm the richest woman in all of Japan bitch.

>>2070527
You're a politician level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am a Patriot, and you're as far beneath me as corporate bureaucrat level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your immense budgets and life-altering decisions? I'm the one who supplies you with that money and tells you to make those decisions. By the time you even pass a bill, I've already set up your assassination and determined your successor. And those voters you brag about fucking? I own all their lives down to the menial details, including their fucking a politician. I still have the the metal gears and the philosopher's legacy you will never see. You keep making your choices and running your sham of a nation. I'll be sitting at my desk, creating nonsensical plot twists from the shadows.

>>2070537

You're a Patriot level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am Snake, and you're as far beneath me as politician level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your la-li-lu-le-lo? I'm the one foils your evil plans with precision and manliness. By the time you even build a metal gear, I've already destroyed it AND the bad guys with nonsensical yet surprisingly awesome special powers protecting it. And that country you always brag about running from the shadows? I'm making it a better place by wiping the likes of you off the face of the earth. You just keep your little philosophers legacy. I'll be on this plane, ready to stop you at a moments notice.

Does this thing go full circle? When does it get to the weeaboo?

I'M GOD.
/thread

>>2070546
You're a Snake level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am the Colonel, and you're as far beneath me as Patriot level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your precision and manliness? I'm the one who gives you the orders in the first place. By the time you even find the base's entrance, I've already had my team of spies locate everything inside it. And that country you always think you're protecting? I've got enough secret agendas and classified information to make your head explode. You just keep destroying your silly metal gears. I'll be inside this Arsenal Gear, mailing your fissions with I NEED SCISSORS! 61!

>>2070552
I'm pretty sure I've seen a Darwin version of this before.

>>2070554
You're a Colonel level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am Mei Ling, and you're as far beneath me as Snake level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your charisma and orders? Well, my voice is fucking hotter than yours. By the time you even have your team of spies locate everything inside of a base, I've already saved my data to a memory card. And those people that you order around? I keep their data too, and I can delete it whenever I fucking want. You just keep coordinating those missions. I'll be inside a menu, sounding hot over the codec.

>>2070554
You're a Colonel level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am Mei Ling, and you're as far beneath me as Snake level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your charisma and orders? Well, my voice is fucking hotter than yours. By the time you even have your team of spies locate everything inside of a base, I've already saved my data to a memory card. And those people that you order around? I keep their data too, and I can delete it whenever I fucking want. You just keep coordinating those missions. I'll be inside a menu, sounding hot over the codec.

.

>>2070554
You're a Colonel level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I am the Admiral, and you're as far beneath me as Snake level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your precision and manliness? I'm the one who kills people when I say so and is gets to be motha fuckin Julius Ceasar. By the time you even find my hidden subs, I've already had my seaplanes blow up your fucking cruisers. And that country you always think you're protecting? I've got enough boats and nukes to make your head explode. You just keep destroying your silly little battlefield. I'll be inside this cocksucker of mine named Davis, (He just blew me, shit was SO cash).

>>2070554
You're a Colonel level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I'm Kenshiro, and you're as far beneath me as Snake level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your foresight and strategies? I'm the one who single-handedly wiped out your forces. By the time you even consider waging a war that continues to destroy the innocent people who get caught in the crossfire, you're already dead. And those spies that you sent out? They just had a taste of my Hokuto Shinken. You just continue to give those orders, I'll be wiping out your soldiers with a single touch.

>>2070585
You're a Kenshiro level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I'm Shin, and you're as far beneath me as Colonel level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your Hokuto Shinken? I'm the one who beat your ass and stole your girl. By the time you become strong enough to fight me, I'll have spread my martial style to thugs all over the world. And that scar on your chest? Don't mention it. You just continue to chase after me, I'll be waiting on my throne, raping your fiancee.

>>2070590
You're a Shin level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I'm God, and you're as far beneath me as Kenshiro level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your planet and the universe? I'm the one who created the fucking universe and can change everything on a whim. By the time you figure our the meaning of lfie, I'll just recreate everything, making your planet, and your achievements pointless. And that planet Earth? Don't mention it, those are a dime a dozen. You just continue to waste your time on pointless things, I'll be watching from above, laughing at you all when i wipe everything out.

>>2070597
You're a God level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I'm Kyon, and you're as far beneath me as Shin level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your creating the fucking universe on a whim? I clean up all your messes and keep you from realizing you ever made them. By the time you pull some whacked out stunt like making a cat that talks or having your moe friend shoot lasers from her eyes, I've already got a cover story set up so that you think it was all just cheesy special effects. You just keep wasting your time looking for aliens, time travelers, and espers, I'll be watching from behind, laughing at you when you talk to them every day without even knowing it.

Jesus samefag spree.

>>2070605
You're a Kyon level otaku, you say? Hrmph, I'm Kyonko, and you're as far beneath me as God level otaku are beneath you. Think you're pretty hot with your creating the fucking universe on a whim? I do the same thing only I'm a hot female. I clean up all Haruki's messes and keep him from realizing he ever made them. By the time he pulls some whacked out stunt like making a cat that talks or having your moe friend shoot lasers from his eyes, I've already got a cover story set up so that he believes it was all just cheesy special effects. You just keep wasting your time cleaning up after Haruhi, I'll be watching from behind, laughing at you when you lose your already pitiful fanbase to me.

i FUCKED YOU´RE MOM!!!!

>>2070610
I applaud his efforts, though

>>2070613
>>2070605
Has Japan released any Kyon/Kyonko selfcest yet?

>>2070616
Yeah I wish I could copy and paste large bodies of text that no one cares about as well. Sigh, maybe someday.

>>2070622
well when you put it that way, I see what you mean