/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>we could even have real life danmaku fights with high-bouncy balls.

But I always sucked a dodgeball.
As, I'd imagine, most people on /jp/ did.

You forgot the "pretend" orgy.

Don't forget idol worshipping :3

Wait a few minutes, bro. I don't even have any pants on right now.

>>1981899

No, games of pretend would be held in the /a/ room across the hall. Of course you are free to spend some time in both as many do on the boards anyway.

no shirt and pants right now

Think of how awkward that would be

I often wish I had friends who were interested in VNs and Touhou as much as I am.

We could talk about visual novels and Type-Moon power levels, and Touhou.
Oh wait.

I've met most people like you in real life.

And all of you are worthless human beings that laugh too loud.

I'll bring the tea.

>>1981908
I want to personally check if your claims of not having nutbladder are true.

>>1981918
>I've met most people like you in real life.
You've met over half of the weeaboo population?

>>1981898
I could dodge just fine, I just couldn't catch the ball unless it was with my face.

I don't want to see all the gross western otakus.
3D anonymous truly is pig disgusting.

If you guys are as obnoxious in real life as you are on the internet...

No thanks.

>>1981918
Happily, I always stifle my laughter. Sometimes I talk out loud to myself, though.

>Imagine it, people who share your interests, in real life.
;_;

>>1981916
I have, we often compare our Touhou performances and play IaMP and SWR. Just don't give up, bro

I wouldn't mind meeting most of the tripfags of /jp/, at least once.

Especially Sion and Hong Meiling.

>>1981893
see
>>1981880

>>1981938

A DC hub is not the same as meeting in real life, although it is cool.

You lads are great and all, but I'd really rather keep you at arm's length.

THE SMELL
THE SMELL!!!

>We could play F/UC, melty, and SWR in person... we could compare our fig collections...
I don't play any of that, and I don't have any figs.

...well, I'll go sit in a corner.

best thread ever

I wouldn't mind meeting fellow /jp/eers as long as they're not gigantic conceited assholes like they try to make themselves out to be on the internet.

I'd come.
I'd bring candy.
And cannabis.

>>1981951

No, don't be shy now. Surely there is something you like. Do you like touhou? Are you a slav?

>>1981953
But how would that be different from every normal American that socializes at parties? How would you know the difference?

HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?

>>1981951
We could play VNs together.

90% of /jp/ would be standing around awkwardly in a corner

>>1981953
I believe I'm quite normal physically

>>1981965
You wouldn't make fun of my figs/model kits/revoltechs and I could hold a discussion with you without wishing you were dead.

We'd need booze to break up the awkward tension.

>>1981966
...how do you play VNs together? Is there competition involved, or teamwork? Will on of us sit on the lap of the other while the other reads out loud?

I'd be one of those 90%

>>1981979
What? I would never make fun of you for something like that.

You think badly of me, Tatari?

>>1981978
He means that you are messed up mentally, not that you are literally a giant disembodied buttocks.

>>1981969

Thats why we would have activities to get people involved. Maybe tournaments for the fightan games, an IOSYS rave, Japanese beer and sake tasting, pin the bloomers on the touhou... etc

>>1981969
Unless the room has more than nine corners (which is quite uncommon), some people would at least share a corner.

>>1981979
BURGER FLIPPIN SO YOU CAN AFFORD FIGS, BROSKI?

>>1981983
We could have a giant projector while some guy sits in front reading it aloud with a microphone. The rest of us can sit and follow along on the projector, reading and occasionally fapping.

we stand in a circle a fap eachother

all of /jp/ wouldn't fit in a single room

>>1981980
I doubt anybody here drinks.

Stay the fuck away from me /jp/. My powerlevel is very low, by your standards at least, so I don't want to be condescended to by a room full of sweaty pedo virgins.

You're fine on the internet, this is your element, but there's a reason I stay away from you fucks in real life.

>>1981983
We're each assigned characters and try to act out what's going on.
Yes, even during sex scenes.

>>1981999
The feeling is mutual.

>>1981998
Bah!
Drinking and loneliness go hand in hand.

>>1981983
Shit I don't know.

And masturbating to a sex scene together would be kinda gay...

ITT: Mutual masturbation and pretend games

>>1981893
No thanks.

I'm only here because you guys are civilized as hell.

>I wish everyone on /jp/ would be teleported into the same room.
Don't include me in your wish. I don't want to hang out in person with a bunch of creeps that failed at life just as badly as I have to talk about what we masturbate to.

>>1981969
Dunno about all of you, but I'm actually pretty outgoing when I'm certain the people around me share my interests.

Besides, most of the pompous assholery that goes on around here is because it's impossible to put across tone on the internet, and we always assume the worst possible meaning behind a given sentence.

I've been thinking of popping in on one of my college's Japan Club animu nights and seeing if I could organize some sort of SWR tournament. I know this is a very bad idea but I yearn to display my minuscule power level once in a while.

Imagine if a >>>FEMANON<<<< came oh god.

I'll bring the tea and convince everyone to engage in a suicide pact at the end.

If I was teleported into a room with you, all of you would kill yourselves out of shock.

>>1981998
You got it right, I've always refused to drink alcohol and such

>>1981966
Why would you do that?

I prefer to be alone when I'm being a gigantic faggot, thank you very much.

>>1981991
>more than nine corners
Yeah, rooms usually only have eight corners.

Everyone on /jp/ wishes CurryButt !CIELBE/jzM would be teleported into their room. We'd play F/UC, melty, and SWR in person... we could even compare our fig collections... we could even have real life curry cookoff contests. Imagine it,CurryButt, in real life.

>>1981999
Really nobody wants to. Hence the friendlessness.

I'd like to talk with Athens about sluts

>>1981998
You may not drink, but I know for a fact that there are several /jp/ers that do drink, and I think there are a lot that we don't know of either.

>>1981998
I'm willing to bet that most of /jp/ does drugs of some kind to cope with their miserable existence.

>>1982010
But I haven't failed in life

>>1982012
>and we always assume the worst possible meaning behind a given sentence.
What?1 Are you saying I insulted you earlier? You got some real guts to be making accusations like that!

>>1982016
I sort of imagine the collective rage at the femanon population would explode and turn into gangrape.

Then again, anon is too afraid of girls to actually do that, so maybe the femanon would be the one doing the rapings...

>>1982028

>curry cookoff contests

fuck I didn't that of that, thats an awesome idea.

>>1982029

All trolling aside, this would be awesome.

>>1982031
Drugs cost money and NEETs are poor.

>>1981986
Well, that's what I'm saying, you wouldn't make fun of me like that.

Anyway, discussing this is nice and all, but it's too bad it won't happen, as much as I wished it did. And even if it did, I live in motherfucking QUEBEC, so count me out.

>>1981969
I know I would.
BUT
THERE ARE ONLY FOUR CORNERS IN A ROOM AND MORE THAN FOUR ANONS IN /jp/
WHAT WOULD WE DO

>>1981999
oohhh, we have a normalfag in the audience

WHY I CAN'T MEET SOMEONE THAT LIKE TOUHOU TOO?

Seriosuly I just want someone to discuss random things about Touhou.

Fuck I would cosplay as Yoshika, I think I could pull it off, I would be the best trap ever.

>>1982016
What if you were the little girl, though?

give me your porns

I attempted to do a chibisexual meetup on /a/, didn't end so well.

If /jp/ is as anti-social /a/, expect awkward silence.

I wish everyone on /jp/ would be teleported into the same room. We could play a battle royale, a holy grail war, and bullet dodging in person... we could compare our di-swords... we could even have real life danmaku fights with high-caliber bullets. Imagine it, people who share your interests, in real death.

>>1982046
You COULD meet someone that likes Touhou, but odds are they'll be retarded as shit.

>>1982044
see
>>1982026
There are eight corners in a standard rectangular prism room.

I... wish this too. ;_; But I live in the middle of nowhere in the second smallest state by pop.

>>1982046
Heh, I found out recently that an online friend of mine is a fan of Touhou. Linking him to the Mima's Twilight Spark vid right now.

>>1982031
But I'm actually quite happy....

>>1982053
>a holy grail war

But who will draw the command seals onto the backs of our hands?

>>1982054
TATARIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

>>1982060

fuck how do you retards proposed getting in the upper corners? Touhous can fly, you can not.

>>1982053
Can I bring a folding chair?

>>1982046
All my friends do, it's quite normal. I've never seen a person that after being properly introduced to Touhou, doesn't like it. Keep trying bro

>>1982044
More than one person could fit in a corner

>>1982061
we can pretend and just draw three lines

>>1982064
Alright I'm coming stop shouting.

What I wish, was that /jp/ was a pub. Or some kind of similar social establishment. People would gather in the evenings, or whatever time they wanted and have heated discussions about powerlevels and how women can't be ronery over a glass of fine Austrian beer. Each table represents a thread.

All I need to enjoy Touhou is the constant influx of the games and doujin material.

Seriously, fuck you all when it comes to discussing Touhou. I have no interest in seeing a bunch of people spouting retarded memes.

I'll stand on the ceiling.

>>1982072
Then, if someone is trolling, you just pick up a bar stool and waste him with it.

... it could work.

>>1982061
Yo.

>>1982060
YEAH WELL YOU HAVE TO CONSIDER THAT NOT ALL CORNERS ARE POSSIBLE OR PRACTICAL TO UTILIZE UNDER NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCES

>>1982072

Slav beer is better than whatever bullshit you said.

>>1982078
Ductape.

>>1982072
So you'd have a couple of retards going to each table shouting about how they don't like whatever people are discussing and insulting them for it?

>>1982072
That'd make it different to attend to different threads. Hell, I follow many threads at the same time, one is not enough.

You guys need some friends. Seriously.

I hope I never meet any of you.

>>1982072
Sometimes you want to go

Where everybody knows your name,
and they're always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name.

>>1982073
I imagine that due to space limitations, all newcommers would have to stay outside

>>1982081
Russian beer is horrible. I can't imagine Eastern European beer is much better.

>>1982082
Pretty much. We might have to hire a bouncer..

Seriously, if anything about this was achievable, I'd fucking do it. If it was possible to convince anons to move to a particular city in order to gather at a pub, I'd make one.

>>1982081
If it's a matter of alcohol, I'm only willing to drink cognac or red wine.

I feel like we're actually having a party

>>1982082
Even most /jp/edos aren't socially dysfunctional enough to do shit like that in real life.

>>1982035
Awesome, I love a dominant woman.

>>1982048
I would consider dressing up in my Kaguya outfit, but I don't think I'd want to risk the gangrape.

Most of you would probably bitch about me smoking.
And then there would be fighting.

...Wait. Is this room empty? Because If there are tables and chairs all hell is going to break loose.

>>1982082

Yeah, but IRL we could get them evicted from the establishment.

>>1982016

B-but Klein, I thought you were female.

My heart is broken.

>>1982085
/jp/ is the only friend I need

>>1982099
Well, I'm not planning on staying in Quebec forever, open the Weeabar already.

So... Strike Witches?

>>1982085
I have friends, they are just not into my more "fringe" interests.

You can show touhou related stuff to friends as long as you don't expect a long stupid meme circlejerk afterwards. It has to be quality and everyone is cool with it.

I don't want to hang with you guys.

>>1982096

No problems here. Since this idea is fictional anyway, utilise the upstairs smoking room.

Actually, I would loot all your figures and stuff.
Or we could have a trading reunion.

We could have IRL power level discussions!

>>1982104
But I'm not an anon.

Really as long as everyone is calm it wouldn't be so bad but if the random /jp/ get-togethers (e.g. Steam group chat) are any indication of what would happen then it would eventually turn into /b/ nonsense.

>>1982109
Second. I can talk to them about anime and Melty Blood, and even a little bit of F/SN, but if I ever started talking about rape, tentacle monsters, and Wanko to Kurasou... yikes.

>>1982106
>Weeabar
OH SHIT! That would be a perfect name!

>>1982029
It isn't all that it is cracked up to be.

>>1982115
In all fairness, the steam voicechat was fine until some retards came along.

Rainbow Girl just started playing here and I am now imagining you guys as 2D characters. Well, I'm never going to meet any of you, so it's almost the same thing.
...;_;

>>1982105
i no rite ;_;

>>1982115
I would imagine/hope that most of us would be far more civilized in person to each other.

I we would actually teleport, we would be so shoked there would be massive heart attacks and traumatic shocked, eventually everuone would realize they're dead and on a room with a big black sphere in the middle

>>1982126
People are ususally more civilized when they risk getting punched in the face if they act like retards.

>>1982128
A lot of retards, actually. But whatever.

>>1982126
It's true, but who knows? The only thing I have to go by in terms of 4chan meetings are like...youtube videos of cons or something. And you can imagine how bad those are.

If we all end up hanging out, will there be private rooms? Be sure to lock the doors!

>>1982115
What do you consider as "/b/ nonsense"?

What if I someone got teleported while fapping

>>1982127
Oh shit, /jp/ Gantz fights would be awesome

>>1982138
Hide out in the bathroom while playing "Bad to the Bone" on a boombox.

>>1982143
Rape.

What if we were all teleported as lolis?

>we could even have real life danmaku fights with high-bouncy balls.

You have my full and undivided attention.

>>1982141
Saying memes, someone playing chocolate rain on the mic at some point. Also a lot of poor Japanese pronunciations, which I'm assuming would also be in abundance at a /jp/ meetup.

>>1982148
It's called dodgeball.

We could bake cookies in the shape of our favorite characters.

I wanna play ookie cookie with Sanya!

>>1982143
Be one hell of an icebreaker.

>>1982150
In frilly dresses.

>>1982150
I was always picked last, as was everyone here.

A guy at work told me he's a regular at 4chan. He knew that I watched anime, (probably because of how socially inept I am) and asked what series I watched. In the end he ended up being a normalfag who liked to party and smoke. It was kind of like looking into a mirror of what could have been, and I really didn't like it at all.

We would have a massive orgy.

>>1982156

I was scrawny and weak in school, but I was really good at catching the balls so I was usually picked near the beginning.