/jp/ - Otaku Culture

What is giving your waifu a foot massage like?

Posting in the name of Tolkien's greatest creation.

>>13450609
Kiss the abomination! Do it now!

>>13450626
Thanks for reminding me that I won't live to see the end of Outsider's prologue.

Here. Have a Girtablilu. I need more though

>>13450579
>did grimdark well
He fought in the battle of the Somme and lost most of his friends in the trenches, so yeah.

>>13450633
Jes wanna irrumate that Girtablilu.

>>13450630
Gladly.

>>13450634
I always thought his description of turin hiding out in that trench for the dragon to pass felt a little too real. A greater metaphor for his experience, perhaps.

>>13450630
But the tentacles...

>>13450642
Nice underboob hug tentacle that girl has.

>>13450642
That guy drew the larvae girl, didn't he?

>>13450648
Kissing a girl with a dozen tentacles instead of a tongue is like getting a dozen kisses at the same time, anon.

>>13450630
How? do I just deepthroat the tentacles to get to her lips?

>>13450656
Sound like it would be cramped.

>>13450630
No, burn it.

>>13450670
Do you like Ignis?

>>13450630
Burn any and all mentions of this manga

>>13450674
If she gets rid of "that", I will like her a whole lot more.

>King offers his monster girl daughteru Princess to anyone who can complete a task
>Said Task is to climb the tallest mountain take the Leaf off a Tankui's head, climb down the other side, steal the gourd of an Oni, climb back up and across the mountain without getting caught
>Then you must use both to sneak into the lair of the Hydra, using the leaf to turn into a statue, and the booze to make the creature drunk and slay it before it sobers up or it regenerates it's heads
>You must also carry the dead body back to prove you killed the Hydra and not simply took one of it's heads
Do you do it?

>>13450657
That's why they call it a deep kiss, anon.

>>13450677
No.

>>13450677
I'll ask the tanuki for a loan, pay the oni to do the job and once I'm married with the princess I use the royal money to pay the loan.

>>13450677
>all this
>for some spoiled princess
I don't even get out of bed for that level of reward.

>>13450677
No.
>Whoring his daughter out
I take her away from her shit father. And live a life of adventure as a fugitive. What griffith should have done, really. Retard.

>>13450677
>Hydra ends up being a lonely CC conjoined Lamia twins
I'll be the young stud they cuddle and love. In fact, I'll just take them over the Princess. They're less spoiled and give better hugs.

>>13450690
What if they get jealous pf each other?

You met her by coincedence in the park. She was the most beautiful girl you had ever seen, perfect in every way. You two quickly hit if off and started dating. After two dates you just knew it, she was the perfect match and meant to be your future wife.

Life went on and you stayed close to her, the sex amazing and her smile geruine. However soon the night of the full moon approached. While it was your intention to be together with her during the evening, she quickly told you that she urgently had to be elsewhere instead.

You were a little dissapointed, but chose to accept her excuse. Surely she must have her own important tasks to take care off and can't always be with you. However as the night fell and you tried to sleep, you couldn't help but feel watched. As the feeling becomes too much to bear, you decide to leave your bed and look around. Hoping to get rid of that nagging feeling.

What you didn't expect to find was her. Hiding in the closet, was a plain, ghostly looking girl. She didn't look like the girl you loved at all, nor did she sound like her as she softly cried. But you simply felt it. You instantly knew that this girl was the same as the one you spend that perfect month with. The one that matched all your desires, hobbies and had the perfect personality.

One question remains however. What would you do now?

Would you accept her, give her a chance? Or would you refuse her, feeling betrayed and angry? or would you do something else entirely?

I want to be a hunter with my monster waifu.

>>13450710
Put it in.

>>13450706
Well there's only one of me, and they're conjoined, so they'll just have to learn how to share.

Crow Tengu Love is best love.

>>13450714
>try to make love to them
>one starts pouting because you "clearly started on her sister's side first"
Sound like it would be vexing.

>>13450727
>not the love seen just out the corner of your eye creeping and crawling towards you

>>13450710
>plain, ghostly looking girl
But that's my fetish. She'd look something like that to snag me in the first place.

>>13450710
I take her hand and say "It's cold, come back to bed."

>>13450727
>no vanilla Crow Tengu stories ever

>>13450739
>only that one tengu story with urethral insertion
No thanks.

>>13450731
You kiss one right when she starts to complain.

If the other is about to you kiss her.

Repeat until both are too engaged in pleasure to complain.

Hydras are jealous needy girls, but deserve love just like anyone else and can give plenty of their own. In fact they give double the love a normal lamia would!

>>13450733
Well maybe she could stop creeping and crawling around and try a more direct approach.

>>13450710
The most gayest thing you would do in this situation.

>a centaur will never give you the frontgina

>>13450753
Thank fuck.

>>13450751
Yeah, and maybe these threads will collectively start loving manticores

>>13450758
So I guess a creep crawly that would aggressively rush me, inject me with her venom and then get intoxicated on my saliva as we rut like beasts is out of the question?

>>13450763
>So I guess a creep crawly that would aggressively rush me, inject me with her venom and then get intoxicated on my saliva as we rut like beasts is out of the question?

The ironic thing is that's what they usually do

You know what I like doing? Bullying wyverns.

>>13450753

>Frontgina

No sense at all.

>>13450763
Thats literally their profile, all this uguu spaghetti crap is pure undiluted threadcanon

>>13450764
Hence why I was hoping for it.

>>13450765
I hope you get bullied by a swarm of Beelzebubs.

>>13450767
Pleasure in the front, business up the back. It's like a reverse mullet.

>>13450770
Then No. An oomukade which acts like a normal oomukade isn't out of the question.

>>13450765
You know what I like doing?

Beating up bullies

>>13450765
>"Ha! Nice arms!"

>>13450765
oh shit that's a christmas tree in the background huh?
i always thought that bitch was zooming around in space

>>13450710
>Ew, get out, slut

I wonder what would happen to her. MGE doppel consists of man's feeling of one-sided love or something. If that man rejected her, would she disappear?

>>13450773
>>13450777
Wyvern will protect me!

>>13450786
It would be extremely depressing

>>13450788
Does she have stockholm syndrome or something

>>13450791
She's a frail girl.

>>13450797
For you

>>13450792
I'm offended that you think I would bully a monster without giving her make up cuddles afterwards. That's like, the whole reason to do it.

>>13450773
Now now, there's no way a Paladin Girl would be posting in this thread.

>>13450805
I want to be bullied by a monster girl and given make up cuddles afterwards!

>>13450807
On the internet, nobody knows you're a paladin. Nobody.

>>13450805
Or you would just cuddle with her without making her feel bad.

I'm starting to have killer instincts towards bullyfags

>>13450776

I understand where you're coming from.

I want human-ish pussy, but I don't want my daughteru's birth to tear my waifu apart.

Still, it just doesn't make sense. The pleasure part and the business part have to be the same.

>>13450773
Projecting a little hard there, aren't you paladin-chan? you probably have a lot of problems. Some pent up stress. But I understand if you want to keep it private. you don't have to tell me what happened, but you do have to eat these eggs. And not with your mouth

>>13450816
She's a masochist, anon

>>13450805
Too late, the Wyvern hates you now. You'll newer know sweet wyvern childhood friend romance.

>>13450827
>you do have to eat these eggs
Why are you doing this?

>>13450809
What Monster Girl is the best bully and cuddler and why is it Hellhound?

>>13450837
You don't want to force a pure paladin girl into being an incubator? I'm not even eggs-up-the-butt guy, but he's got me fond of the idea.

>>13450845
I think manticore is better at bullying

>>13450847
Wouldn't work, the sticks up their asses don't leave enough space for much else in there.

>>13450845
Hellhounds don't bully, they just rape you and then cuddle with you. Unless you count rape as bullying.

>>13450845
Gazer.

>>13450847
I'd rather force a pure paladin girl into being an incubator for me.

>>13450859
But what do they do when married? I mean, they're big tough strong dominant girls. They'd probably end up with some weak subby boy.

How can they resist bullying?

>>13450855
Doesn't stay in the ass, plops into the belly. Imagine how confused she'd be after hours of sexual abuse for you to lovingly turn around and cuddle her bumpy belly. How much switching and good-cop bad-cop would it take to mindbreak a paladin?

>>13450863
Anon, you don't lay eggs.

>>13450865
Because they don't care about bullying, they don't have shit taste. They're happy just with having sex and cuddling with their husbands.

If you want dom bullies you should go for manticores.

>>13450845

An inept bully Wurm.

>Hey Four-Eyes!
You don't wear glasses.

>Shoots spitballs at you
If you unwrap them, they're love notes.

>She traps you in the Gym equipment room.
Joins you.

>>13450855
Gotta work up to it, start with small eggs and get bigger and bigger. Eventually you can feed the eggs inside her with some nice anal ceampies.

>>13450875
>If you unwrap them, they're love notes.
Wurm bullied me the other day. Shot a spitball at me that was just a crumpled up picture of me soaked in love juices. what do?

>Find a perfect pic for my Valkyrie waifu
>She doesn't have wings
Fuck

>no stronk girl to lift with
G-guess I'll just go to the gym alone

>>13450875
Rape the Wurm bully.

>>13450868
>Anon, you don't lay eggs.
I mean for her to incubate my seed with her eggs, if you know what I mean.

>>13450880
well, she probably can't read or write, so that's the same as a love note.

>>13450883
Muscle megane best megane. Would cuddle in the shower.

>>13450876
>all this paladin butt stuff

Sinful! Vile! Indecent!

>>13450880
You know exactly what to do.

>>13450883
>go to the gym alone
Don't worry, you won't leave alone

>>13450894
Cum on a picture of her and throw it at her? Is this young love?

>>13450885
Bully not so tough after being molested

>>13450882
link, i'll redraw for practice

>>13450883
I want to see her in a suit and a short skirt with black stockings held up by a lacy garter belt and tight, pussy-conforming panties.

>>13450874
>Bully Monster Girls
>Shit Tastes
No it's not! I bet you I can get a Hellhound to willingly bully me and make her enjoy doing so!

Bully monster girls are the best!

>>13450895
Maybe a Jinko will correct my form doing squats. Or an Oni will bully me about how little I'm benching (lmao1pl8), or maybe a stuttering Alp cardio bunny in spats will ask me how to lift.

>>13450885
>Making a Wurm know that you're receptive for sex
Good idea

>>13450906
Bullying a shit. A SHIT.

>>13450902
http://i.imgur.com/du73hhw.jpg

Never trust elves.
And certainly never let an elf near your bottom.

>>13450892
I bet paladin anus is super tight from all the clenching. I want to tie one down and gently massage and kiss her all over to make her relax and then slowly work my hot, throbbing erection into her tight virgin holy rectum. I'd forcibly kiss her and hug her as I shoot my seed deep inside her.

>>13450907
Maybe the Jinko and the Oni will drag the Alp into the locker room while you are changing to convince her that she should bulk up by demonstrating what a big, strong monster girl can do with a human. All they'd need is a volunteer.

>>13450909
>Making a Wurm know that you're receptive for sex
>Good idea
It's but one step in my master plan.

>>13450909
As mentioned in a previous thread, bullying in this context most likely means light teasing. People are just lazy in word choice. Plus meme.

A real bully monstergirl would be terrible and unpleasant. A 'bully'/teasing monstergirl is something I'm ambivalent toward. Could be good, could be bad.

>>13450920
That would be lewd and lovely and painful.

>>13450917
Good thing this elf is just a cosplayer

I want a story about a Hellhound Senpai who bullies her underclassman human boy, thinking nothing of it until one time she ends up causing him to have a mental breakdown. After trying to comfort him a bit she finds out how she's not the only bully in his life and that her bully victim has had a harsh miserable. Now equipped with an understanding about the consequences of bullying, she vows to protect her kohai's smile and tries to cuddle him and improve on her bully-tendencies.

>>13450883
>>13450895
>First day on a gym where practically all the clients are monstergirls except for one or two human girls
>Dozens of eyes all over you
>Jinkos, female orcs, onis, minotaurs, werewolves everywhere
>You can even see some of them licking and biting their own lips

>>13450930
And tiring. What if they take a liking to you? Extra 'workout' sessions every time you're done with your usual routine. What if the Alp also gets swole? Three firm, sweat sheened bodies pressing up against you, eager hands roaming all over you waiting to see who gets to go first. No amount of cardio gives you enough stamina for that.

Manticores started getting hate because they were so popular. Now that they're no longer popular, is it ok to like them now?

I want to be bullied by a Manticore!

>>13450942
>You'll never make your Gazer friend go to the gym just to laugh at her
Why even live

>>13450942
Maybe you shouldn't go to an all-female gym.

>>13450946
sounds wonderful, but I know each of their weaknesses.
Jinko's is pic related
Oni's is telling how feminine and pretty she looks
Alp's is holding her hand

>>13450948
It was always ok to like Manticores. You just have to accept that someone will almost inevitably hate what you like you filthy tailpussy slut.

>>13450948
I hope bullying stars getting hate too

>>13450956
Where is your sense of adventure

>>13450961
Teasing is just a thing that you do though. fucking monstergirls is just a thing you do, too and that's pretty popular and that will never get old. I can't see light teasing going anywhere.

>>13450963
It follows my sense of self-preservation.

>>13450942
I also want a buff minotaur to bully me at the gym

>>13450955
Why would you even want that? Only to see the poor Gazer dripping with sweat and that oily black stuff on her limbs as her tail and eyestalks droop, almost dragging behind her?

>>13450961
I bully on a daily basis and my friends never get tired of it because they know I don't do it seriously. It's just teasing, a lot.

>>13450958
Oh please, as if they wouldn't make you do it on a daily basis so they can overcome their weaknesses.

>>13450978
but the secret weapon is ear nibbling

Harpies are great

>>13450710
Niebelfader's Insecure Doppleganger was pretty good

>>13450980
As if big, strong, confident monsters would become putty in your hands just because you sensually kiss, nimble and lick their ears.

>>13450988
Well the Alp would at least

>>13450981

Cute picture! But inaccurate!

Papi has shown she has great motherly tendencies.

She'd hug those chicks so hard.

>>13450983
>reposting images
why?

>>13450970
Exactly. That's the idea

>>13450991
Oops

>>13450983
Yeah, back when he delivered.

>>13450992
She'd get her revenge. Eventually, when she finally catches her breath.

>>13450989
She'd be a confident monster by then who don't need no gentle ear nibbling. Wouldn't say no though. Only to prove that it has no effect on her, of course. The moisture on her spats would also only be sweat.

>>13450988
They would though.

>>13451001
Good thing I do cardio.

Would monstergirl grandmas make delicious meals?

>>13450937
I want to reenact Yandere Kanojo with Great White sempai.

>>13451027
Yes.
They'd fatten you up with real food, then make you play it off by running around as they make fat jokes.

>>13451027
Sure.

>>13450990
Those chicks are Unfortunate Harpies.
They're nasty old men that look like birds but have big, burly human legs.

>>13451027
Hey whats this book I found in Grandma Werewolf's house

>>13451044
Man every time I see this I can't help but get grossed out. Cum pudding. Imagine the texture. Eugh.

>>13451012
I would help her braid her hair so hard.
Then fuck her into oblivion.

Big, ornate braids like that are my hair fetish. Also Yukari style hair.

>>13451027
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zrv2FuajJZ8

>>13451059
The hypest grandmas.

>>13451011
Well if she really doesn't need it I guess she'll just have to go without

>>13451061
I can just picture an Alp struggling between her newfound pride and the need for gentle intimacy.
You wouldn't tease one by making her ask for it, would you?

>>13451074
>You wouldn't
It's like you don't know me at all, Anon

>>13451057
>liking old hags

>>13451106
She is also a cannibal

>>13451106
>not liking old hags
Pleb.

>>13451106
I just want to fill the gap in her heart

Who rusalka here?

>>13451155
Peny

>>13451153
Right. Since your intentions are so pure, I'm sure you wouldn't even think of filling any other holes. You don't have those sort of warped preferences, do you, Anon?

>>13450935
>Cosplayer.
So she's a human girl?
I don't know if that's worse.

>>13451074
You'd better believe I would. I'd even offer to hold her hand and slowly caress her inner-thigh, while whispering sweet nothings into her ear.

If she's good, I may even let her test out her confidence by being top that night.

>>13451184
>letting an Alp top
Throwing her straight in at the deep end, I see.

>>13451179
She keeps saying she's always wanted to have kids. I'm not so callous a man as to deny her the joy of motherhood.

>>13451198
You wouldn't steal a bear.
You wouldn't download a car.
You wouldn't repeatedly knock up a monster GMILF.

>>13451213
I would do all of those things. Any red blooded American would.

>>13451182
She's cosplaying as you, and your butt's her dream dress.

>>13451213
>steal a bear
probably not
>download a car
I would and have
>repeatedly knock up a monster GMILF
We would make that clan on breeders on TLC look infertile.

>>13450727
Always.

>>13451000
>>13450983
Forgiveness prease, anon.
If this fickle slut doesn't come to visit me, I can't deliver anything. And she's giving me the cold shoulder lately, the cockteasing bitch.

Appreciate the loev for doppelwaifu, anyway. Thanks

>>13451213
No, I would totally do that last thing.
I'd take that aging kistune and pump her so full of kits that she wouldn't give birth to kids, she'd give births to broods.
That mature and (Grand)motherly air they have is the best, no to mention that they age like fine wine.
One could say that I love silver foxes.

>>13451213
>You wouldn't steal a bear
Well, that depends. Are we talking an actual bear? And where am I stealing it from? I would definitely steal a GMILF Grizzly from the zoo or something and knock her up repeatedly.

What if men whos hearts are so small they are only noticed by monster girls with giant hearts like wurms and yetis? What if those men bbegin to use their nigh invisible status to start robbbing banks being guarded by monstergirls? What if i started writing cook anon again?

>>13451240
>Oh bother, you wouldn't want an old grizzly like me. I sleep all day and am a little softer than I used to be in my younger days.
>You don't mind? Well, I guess I could always use something new to cuddle as I sleep.

>>13451237
If only reality was so kind. Seems like only 1 in 20 women actually age well.

>>13451247
>Bear-milf waifu goes into hibernation
>Spend all winter cuddled up next to her, playing vidya, reading, etc.
>Survive off her breast milk
>By the time she wakes up she's a thin, willowy hottie
>Start stuffing her with sweets and repeat the process all over again next year

Would your waifu still love you if your dick, the better part of one leg's muscle, and a large portion of skin on your abdomen were blown off by an Order car bomb, lacerating your face? The wounds will heal and you will survive. You won't be horribly mangled in the facial region either, but you'll be hospitalized for a while.

>>13451247
>>13451252
Heavenly. She would probably be a sight to see with some honey, too.

>>13451245
Someone who would abuse their love in that manner should be exterminated.

>>13451258
It's not abusing their love if I'm robbing other monster girls who don't even know i exist in order to make my waifus life better

>>13451256
>Order car bomb
Pls no propaganda.

>>13451256
No dick=no spirit energy=no interest for mg
That's pretty obvious

So if Lamia has a magicial voice that can entice men then what if they got into ASMR?

>>13451263
The order is all about killing monstergirls. Why wouldn't they use car bombs?

>>13451262
Lies. You specifically stated that their heart tiny, and if you have a tiny heart you aint gonna try and improve anyone's life but your own.

>>13451256
>Treating the Order like guerrillas
>When they're the Order, the biggest government in all of monster land.

More like a smart missile or bunker buster to get traitor-kun's.

>>13451271
Because car bombs are pleb tier.

>>13451273
>not bio-weapon like virus killing only MGs

>>13451277
So is the order.

>>13451273
>ISIS-tier fanatics
>technology

>>13451264
B-but muh tru luv though...

>>13451279
Whatever you say, traitor.

>>13451277
>Not bycycle bombs

>>13451271
Because they're an organized military with the resources of all human kind behind them mostly. They'd use real weapons.

>>13451278
That's still in development, as it still kills Order-approved girls like Houri, Angels and Apsara. And that's just unacceptable.

>Trying to stop the New World Order created by the Demon Lord

>>13451272
If they live with their waifu then by improving their own life they are improving the waifus. The yetis/wurms forced their way into their lives in an attempt to "fix the cold man".

>>13451289
>wanting a dystopian world

>>13451256
You fucking faggot.

>>13451291
>World where Monster Girls rule and Human Boys have their needs taken care of
>Dytopian
More like Utopian

>>13451286
>not unicycle bombs

>>13451291
>world ruled by mama Chief God that knows best and corrupted theocracy
>not dystopian

>>13451299
You're not even trying.

>>13451287
>eros minions
>order approved
Ahahah
No

>>13451311
Both sides are shit, more at 11.

>>13451315
They are. Read the profiles. Eros gets a pass in Order lands.

>>13450948
>manticores
>popular
>not simply spammed to death by bob and #tailpussy

Are we arguing about pointless things again? Here, have an Ameratsu.

>>13451315
>>13451322
They're "approved" in the sense that they consider them acceptable tests of a knight's sanctity and chastity.
They don't like them, and if you shack up with one you're viewed with suspicion by the inquisition, but it's not technically an executable offense.

>>13451330
Smelly doggy pls go.

>>13451331
>inquisition
Man, what?

>>13451331
>Making up headcanon nonsense
KC says specifically that getting a waifu delivered from god as a reward is celebrated.

Shit like unmonsterized elves and other demihumumans are tolerated.

>>13451291
>>13451291
>>13451299
ELECTRONIC OLD SUCCUBI

RUNNING THE COCK

>>13451340
> Eros, Goddess of Love
> "Also, there are times when she dispatches her subordinates to men who perform good deeds. Her angel subordinates are all extremely beautiful physically and spiritually, and they strongly desire to love human men. Their mission is to continue showering men who've accumulated good deeds with love as their wives until they die. One would think this behavior is close to that of the monsters, but no matter what, it's regarded as “a way of expressing appreciation for those who have done good deeds. The Order views it with suspicion, but it isn't treated as heresy or blasphemy."

>>13451347
What a shame.

>>13451258
>>13451252
>She normally has a layer of pudge that makes her look soft, giving her a small belly you can tease her with.
>Her face has a matronly air about it, a little worn to show her maturity but without any sagging or drooping, hinting at the beauty she had been in her younger days.
>Her breasts have remained perky despite their age, a pair of great, heavy orbs that beg to be fondled.
>Her hips are wide and her thighs thick, giving her a small hourglass figure while her rear is a bouncy bubble butt you can sink your hand into
>All of this in a person who loves to snuggle with you when she sleeps, or just laying about in general.
>You will never come home from work after a long day to find her sitting in the den, reading a book with a pair of black reading glasses perched on her head, a specialty pair made for grizzlies, and suckling some honey as she reads, a steaming plate of dinner on the table next to her as she waits for you.

>>13451340
Angel and Valkyrie are approved by order
Eros minions are suspicious but tolerated

>>13451348
>The Order views it with suspicion
Of course they do when stuff like the Houri is almost indistinguishable whether it's been corrupted or not and DE is like this unstoppable cancer infecting everything. You have to keep your eye on them.

That doesn't support anything you said about tests or inquisition one bit.

Other material also mentions how there are still many worshipers of Eros in the Order lands.

>>13451347
>succuvirus
I knew there was a reason they called it "freeware".

>>13451364
>Spyware
>It's just a Succuvirus that records all your data and sends it to MG's in the neighbourhood
>Also may or may not turn your monitor into a camera without you knowing and may or may not host a livestreaming site which just livestreams your life

>>13451371
Actually, it was supposed to be a dig at her for being a slut.

>>13451371
Sounds terrible. Why would anyone want to see my life, anyway?

>>13451374
I don't know Anon, why do Wurms like the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?

>>13451375
Because it's fucking delicious

>>13451375
Presumably, they wouldn't like looking at an empty room 80% of the time, and the chances of them capturing me doing something other than looking at a blank screen are tiny. Is there a fetish for boring people?

>>13451354
Yep. It seems I was right to call that heavenly. Delicious Grizzly milf/gmilf.

>>13451374
Maybe you have some creepy stalker that wants to always watch you?

>>13451383
I don't know anon, is their a fetish for tiles?
Don't answer that. I know

>>13451371

>You have been monitored by various MGs living nearby for awhile now.
>One day you just have a terrible day where nothing goes right for you.
>And you start rambling on and on about to what you think is an empty room.

>>13451391
>Tiles
It's been some time

>>13451371
>Not looking at walls like there are cameras from a comedy show while making faces

This is getting a little too Truman Show for me.

>>13451394
>Checking out at the groccery store with all the stuff you need for the week
>Just about to pay when the cashier gives you a smile
>"Anon, you forgot to buy some more milk."
>Oh shit, you actually did forget to buy some milk
>"Oh anon, you're so forgetful."
>It's true. you've had a tendancy of forgetting the little things as of late
>After thanking the nice cashier and buying a few bottles of milk, you go on your way back to the comforts of your ho-
>Wait a tick. How'd she know you were forgetful?
>And how'd she know you forgot to buy milk?

>>13451398
They're watching you right now. Better do something interesting, the sponsors need money.

>>13451397
>Not glancing at nothing and making a smirk after you made a joke like you're in a comedy show

>>13451406
I'm literally the most boring person alive. How could they possibly be making money off of lying in bed in shorts?

>>13451409
You'd be surprised

>>13451409
Lewdness.

>>13451409
>How could they possibly be making money off of lying in bed in shorts?
They'd be making a lot more if you wore nothing at all.

>>13451402
>And how did she know your name?

>>13451418
This conversation is getting too lewd for me.

>>13451428
Are you some kind of blushing maiden? Give the girls some action.

>>13451431
Gazer pls go and stay go.

>>13451431
I don't know Anon, some girls get off to this Anon's behaviour
If he were to change it he'd upset the viewers.

>>13451402

>Turn off your computer for the evening
>Meanwhile on the otherside with the MGs watching
>They're all disappointed that you're turning in early
>But they all wish you a good night anyway.

>>13451443
>You swear to god everytime you go to bed you hear a faint "good night!"
>And the occasional "sweet dreams!"

>>13450630

>>13450630
You bet your ass I would.

>>13451398
I'd read the fuck out of some MG based Truman Show thing. Sounds like a lot of fun.

>>13451384
>She has one round, fuzzy ear that looks like it has a chunk missing from it
>When you ask about it she just reply that its from "My rebellious younger years, I was quite the hellion you know?"
>You think she's just talking about being a bit of a punk when she was little when she was, in reality, the head of one of MGC's most fearsome gangs.
>You sometimes get her to wear her old gang leathers in the bedroom so she can "feel young", talking like a ganger as she rides you.
>She's REALLY good at it, although she does comment that everything "feels a bit smaller than it used to be."

Why are older MGs so great?
I kind of want to see an old familiar that acts like a crotchety old man.

>>13451447

>One day you neglect to lock up your place before leaving
>The MG take note of this and one of them decides to visit you
>While out during town you realize you forgot to lock up
>You move to return
>But the cashier tell you "oh don't worry I doubt anyone stole your things " suddenly
>How did she even know
>You return home, ignoring her words, expecting that your possessions will be damaged or stolen
>Instead a single MG waits for you inside
>"Welcome home!"

>>13451431
And if I am?

But that's not the point. They'd watch someone more interesting than me.

>>13451459
>A single MG waiting for you inside
>Not coming home expecting your possessions to be gone just to find out that you're door was locked
>But who locked it?

>>13450642

>>13451470

>And also how was it locked?
>You only had the one key and it's on your person.

>>13451470
>not having door lock behind you as you come home

>>13451455
So what's the Anon Show theme song?

Do they have special songs they play at key moments? Like the touching song whenever emotional shit is happening, or the slow jams for when Anon starts masturbating?

Do they have a blooper reel? Imagine all the embarrassing shit you do is saved onto a blooper reel and set to the Benny Hill theme.

>>13451450

>TFW the World attacked Thing-chan
>ATTACKED HER
>Rather than partake in Communion
>With its inflexible lumps of flesh that are weak

>>13451479
>You don't know what to be afraid of
>The fact that you may have locked your door but completely forgot
>Or the fact that someone, maybe some divine entity which watches over you, has your key

>>13451483
Altman Sheeple pls.

>>13451458
>Former thug Grizzly
Yes. This line of thought has developed so nicely. Also, older MGs are so great because older MGs.

>>13451482
>or the slow jams for when Anon starts masturbating?
>masturbating
So, I've wondered for years, but do you think they would have shown him masturbating as he grew up? The whole show is based on his every moment, but that would definitely be illegal.

>>13450710
Doppelganger's entry is some of the stupidest shit ever. Just tell the guy what you are when he loves you, tell him of the condition on your powers, and keep being the best girlfriend ever by letting your boyfriend have sex with a different woman every night. Geez.

>>13451497
The MG version definitely would.
Probably sell a special "through the ages" compilation.

>>13450733
I want to beat her tummy from the inside.

>>13451497
Can you imagine the look on her face when you get her pregnant?
How happy she'd be?
She'd probably wrap you up in a big ol' hug and carry you off to bed.

>>13451497
>definitely be illegal
To be fair the whole concept for the show is illegal, so who knows what kind of laws they have in that setting.

>>13451516
Oh god. I can imagine it now. They could also sell a yearly compilation of each time he did it during the year and rake in the money.

>>13451530
True happiness. Complete and true. First you choose an old grizzled grizzly like her, and then you give her a child? Yes.

>>13451541
True enough. I was trying to ignore that whole part, but I guess if we're discussing illegality, you really can't.

What if the introduction of MGs into our world brings back magic? What if Shamans from our world bbeing forced to work side bby side with bbaphomets and other sabbath members to try and quell the fairy/pixie uprisings?

>>13451561
Good lord, does your keyboard have a typing impediment?
Either way, brings back" implies that we had it in the first place, and chances are our magic capabilities are 100% gone after not using them for so long.

>>13451561
We Shadowrun now.

Prepare for Horrors.

>>13451575
Yes actually it does. My lil bbro spilled soda on it and the B key is fucked now.
And shamanic is one type I can see as bbeing an inherent magic because it has to deal with man's conneciton to nature.

>>13451515
If you stick to the profile like glue, I don't think doppels can actually transform at will.
They become the perfect waifu of the guy they imprint on, but then they can't spontaneously choose to turn into something else. They're fixed in the form they first adopt, except at the full moon when they're fixed as the plain black chick.

>>13451581
You could just use backspace and erase one of the 'b's, Anon.

I will never have hot, sweaty, post-workout sex with Yuugi. ;_;

I've got no strings
To hold me down
To make me fret, or make me frown
I had strings
But now I'm free
There are no strings on me

>>13450618
The best.

>>13451583
And if their husband comes to love their true form, they can't transform at all, yeah?

>>13451589
THERE ARE NO STRINGS ON ME

That doll looks pretty damn cute by the way

>>13451589
Surprisingly I like this colour scheme better than the original

>>13451589
I would take her to work, a portable waifu.

>>13451587
She would grind your bones to dust anyway.

>>13451581
>man's conneciton to nature
Druids fit that bill much more than a shaman.

>>13451603
I'll manage.

>>13450914
Dayum anon, you got some good taste.

>>13451610
Shaman is pretty much just shorthand for any kind of heathen priest or witch doctor. Druid indicates a specific religion.

So you're both right and wrong in certain ways.

>>13451621
Druids were more into the whole nature thing than something like a witch doctor.
Would beast, insect, and plant type MGs be more into Druids?

>>13451559
>Old ganger grizzly sitting in a lazy boy as she cuddles your newborn duaghter, the baby grizzly holding on to her moms hand.

>>13451630
>Winter comes again
>This time you share the bed with 2 bears instead of 1
>Cuddle daughteru like a teddy bear whenever you get bored

>>13451627
Some Indian medicine man of a tribe that worships the spirits of nature would still be a shaman or a witch doctor. Druids just narrows it down to the actual druids, the shamen of the Celts and Gauls. Nature worship is the oldest basest form of worship after all and exists in a thousand different varieties over the ages.

>>13451589
Ultron-palette Golem, pls?

>>13451561
>shamans
Look around you
Look beyond
You could make an unbreakable bond
The world around is not what it seems
Souls revealed beyond your wildest dream
>tfw It was 14 years ago
Fuck ;_;

>>13451589
Huh, this is probably the first recolor I actually like

>>13451644
Interesting.
Still, would those Celtic Druids be hit on by Yew Dryads that take ages to actually grow? And make a bow from their wood as a pact?

>>13451638
>Chubby daughteru you cuddle through the winter
>Even in their sleep, neither she nor her mom want to let you go.

Muh heart.

>>13450626
>it actually updated

Holy hell.

Remember to pet the daughteru non-sexually anons.

>>13451663
>Outfit
>Haircolor
Keine is not a daughteru.

>>13451663
But I neither have nor want a daughteru.

>Feeling a little under the weather, good thing it's the weekend, wouldn't want to have to go into work like this
>Your Kikimora maid insisted on going to the store to get soup and ginger ale
>While she's gone you feel a little nostalgic and decide to look for your old NES
>Thinking about where it is, you remember that you put it in the closet that your Kikimora took over for her things, so unless she moved it, it should still be there
>You go to check and start searching through the closet
>Maid attire, maid attire, maid attire, maid attire, oh that's a nice dress, maid attire... what's this?
>Folded up on a shelf in the back is some really delinquent-esque clothing, is this really her's?
>"Master?"
>Shit, uh, abort
>You stuff it back in the closet and turn around before uncomfortably asking why she's back already
>"I bought what I needed for my sick master and came right home, it didn't take long. More importantly, where did you find that?"
>Find what?
>"Those clothes, I thought I got rid of them"
>Well, they were there, and it's not like you were snooping, you were just looking for your NES
>"Master you look uncomfortable, does it make you upset to know that I was like that in the past?"
>Wait that wasn't a costume?
>"In school I was a little... rowdy, and it earned me a reputation as someone who enjoyed fighting and causing trouble"
>"B-b-but that's all in the past!"
>She looks like she's about to cry
>You pull it back out of the closet and hold it up, then smile and ask her if she'd like to wear it again for old time's sake
>"You mean you're okay with it?" she tentatively asked
>You tell her yeah, that you think it'll look really good on her and might spice things up in the bedroom
>She's smiling from ear to ear and her face is as red as a tomato

>>13451589
>living doll outraged at films like Child's Play and Demonic Toys

>>13451663
You say it like I didn't already know.

>>13451651
>>tfw It was 14 years ago
Goddammit anon, I feel old...

>>13451663
It's not like my dick is inside her 24/7, get your mind out of the gutter.

>yfw MGs want your mind in the gutter always

Heh.

Line 166
http://pastebin.com/zc5vhD0E
>Disgrace

Not actually a Paladin anymore.

>>13451673
>Ex-Delinquent Kikimora
>Master likes her to dress up and be a bit "Rowdy" in the bedroom
I like this idea. I like this idea a fair deal.

>>13451676

>Loves Puppet Master though.

>>13451685
>turgid

STOP IT

>>13451593
>>13451647
I HAD STRINGS
BUT NOW I´M FREE
THERE ARE NO STRINGS ON ME

>>13451701
Oh for god's sake

>>13451561

>"So... magic is a thing now, eh?"
>"Apparently it was always a thing, we just sorta... forgot about it."
>You eyeball your American counterpart over the bar table. Cynicism all over your face.
>"So these... 'Monster Girls'... they stir any trouble up for you guys yet?"
>"Well, a few elves tried to sabotage some oil rigs out in Alberta and there's a bunch of dwarves in Labrador that dug a hole in the ground and proclaimed themselves their own country, but that's about it. You?"
>"Well, the US government has been 'politely informed' by a rather militant group of monsters that 'the veil', whatever that is, is extraordinarily thin at these coordinates and that they'll be seizing control of it in the next few days and it would be unwise to try and stop them."
>You look down at the little sheet of paper he slides towards you.
>"31.7833° North, 35.2167° East...?"
>"Yessir."
>It takes you a minute.
>"...That's fucking Jerusalem."
>"Yup."
>"Ah man, this is not gonna end well."

>>13451696
Why is MGG so mad about turgid? Did Bob use it to describe his futacocks or something?

>>13451701
Spooky.


>>13451583
>they don't have a fixed form
>they are always transformed and never show their true form

Anon, get off my nuts and let me have my fun.

>>13451715
Turgid is just an unerotic word.

>>13451589
Top cutie. Would bukkake pregnant.

>>13451701
Bride of Pinbot, you are not.

Nice touch, though.

>>13451710
>thrown out of plane by Ushi-Oni

>>13451723
HE DIDN'T FLY SO GOOD, WHO WANTS TO TRY NEXT?

>>13451701
2spooky5me.

>>13451724
Perhaps she's wondering why you would shoot a woman before throwing her out of a plane?

>>13451733
At least you can talk, who are you?

>>13451723
>You will never put your Ushi-Oni waifu to sleep by repeatedly punching her in the face.

>>13451723

>"Uh... ma'am? That was the pilot."

>>13451592
Yeah.
The only form a doppel can take is "perfect waifu". Which initially is some human qt, but then if she does well it becomes the gothic loli.

...which is fairly lame, and the threadcanon one where she can do whatever the fuck she wants is much more fun.

>>13451747
Yeah. I like her original form, but what would be the point of a doppelganger if she couldn't change her form anymore?

>>13451743
>"That was the plan."
Cue several thousand feet of pelviseration at terminal velocity.

>>13451715
Funny enough, yes.

>>13451753
I would never leave my house if monster girls existed.

I want /tv/ to leave.

I just realized something. You guys remember the Dark Matter who wrote the second World Guide?
She's actually pretty waifuable.
>She wants a loving husband instead of just a cumpump
>She's a christmas cake who missed out on getting a husbando when she turned her home kingdom into a demon realm
>Despite being a dark matter, she's implied to be a bit of a sub
>Smart and has elemental familiars who she wants to share you with.
>Busty, nerdy, christmas cake Dark Matter who just wants a loving husbando.
Seriously, I'm not joking. Look at these quotes.
>"though I am verbose when writing, I'm extremely nervous when actually meeting someone face to face and chatting, and I must admit I'm rather taciturn. So, I'd prefer a person who would gently pat my head, hug me, kiss me, and then push me over, and make me feel really good if I affectionately leaned close to him without saying a word."
And this one about Raging Mushrooms
>"a monster raped with such a penis will learn the joy of being violated as a female and raped by a male of overwhelming power... In fact, I yearn for this a bit myself."

Now if only she didn't have such shit opinions on corruption and monsterization.

>>13451756
So no different from now, what's your point?

>>13451756
...because you'd be locked in the rape basement by ur waifu?

>>13451759
>waifuable
>sub
roaringlaughter.webm

>>13451759

You forgot the part where she just wants to be fucked and ignore you while reading all day. That firmly locks her into the shit category for me, along with her opinions.

>>13451759
Oh yeah those aren't lies at all.

>>13451763
That's a hot opinion ya got there.

>>13451759
>telling anons of the waifuable monster instead of waifuing her before anyone else

Do you want NTR? Cause that's how you get NTR.

>>13451771
Don't be a racist anon.

>>13451772
Yes, it's a big opinion

>>13451766
Yeah, this is the problem right here.
If she was really interested in sex at all she wouldn't have had her nose in a book when her homeland went monster.
She really just wants to use you as a dickthrone while she keeps working.
She's only good for apathy fetishists.

>>13451762
No.

>>13451763
>if she's not making me her bitch I'm not interested

Laughing Dorfs.jpg

>>13451759
...So basically she's Shindol's librarian girl.

>>13451781
She actually straight says it too. Something along the lines of "I just want a husband who loves me and doesn't mind dicking me all day while I'm reading my books."

That's so terrible it's turribel.

>>13451773
Didn't I say that her shit opinions on Corruption are kind of a deal breaker for me?

>>13451766
Sounds great to me, could be pounding her like there's no tomorrow and making out with her familiars while she lazily flips through a pretentious novel and occasionally moans louder than she intended.


If you really wanted you could make it a mission to fuck her so hard she couldn't focus on her book.

>>13451797
>Liking apathetic sex
You two were made for each other. Go be happy. The rest of us will be happy for you even if also slightly disgusted.

>>13451756
>>13451762

Progress in science and technology would stagnate if Monstergirls were real here since they're horny all the fucking time.

>Strong MGs would invade a space research center and kidnap the guys who are working hard to invent space elevators or spaceships that would take us to new habitable planets in outer space in order to husbando them
>Yandere MG locks the guy who would discover the cure to cancer in her basement
>MGs rape the pilots in a 747 in mid-flight before they get to push the "autopilot" button
>Obsessive MGs claim the people who keep the stock market from going down the shitter and snatch them away while they're at work whenever they please

And so on.

>>13451803
Eh, nothing a little violence can't fix.

>>13451803
Which is why I'm incredibly glad that monster girls will never exist.

>>13451803
You're forgetting the positives

>Beezlebubs unleashed and completely destroy Africa
>Tanukis outjew Jews
>The existence of the Elementals allows for the creation of perpetual energy

Shit man do I even need to continue, all that alone makes up for the cancer guy. The word will survive.

>>13451803
>Progress in science and technology would stagnate if Monstergirls were real here since they're horny all the fucking time.

They would if they were in charge and allowed to do whatever they pleased anyway.

The real solution to most of those problems is to have only married people work those jobs. Imagine having to get married like as soon as you hit puberty in the same expected manner as going through school, then going through the rest of your life.

>>13451798
>not liking apathetic sex
It's like you don't even kittypussy.

>>13451823
Yes, heard you go on about tiny bored brown kitty plenty of times thanks. I'll pull up the archives if I want to read it again.

>>13451798
But apathetic sex is great. So is sleep sex, that's why I like Weresheep and Dormouse.

>>13451823
I don't furiously dislike it, it's just it's not really waifu material.

>>13450710
>>13450713
>>13450735
>>13450738
Take note: i've never written smut before.

A smile forms on your face as you realize that the answer to that question is incredibly simple. You reach out to her and take hold of her hand, causing her to look up to you with tears in her eyes.

“It’s cold, come back to bed” you simply tell her as you give her hand a light pull. She only looks at you for a short moment before crashing into your arms, still sobbing but the tears now flowing from happiness.

“Are you sure?” she whispers, as you pick her up and walk towards your bed. “I never even had to think about it” is all you have to say. A smile forms on her face as you carefully lay her on your bed before joining her yourself. As you lay down she simply rolls over on top of you and rests her head on your chest. You spend the next few minutes simply stroking her soft black hair, as she nuzzles her face in your chest and neck and takes in your smell.

After a while you decide to take things further, as you slowly bring her face towards yours. Understanding what you wish she closes her eyelids covering her ruby-red eyes and brings her lips to yours. As you do the same you feel her cold, yet soft lips connect to yours. As you both give each other several pecks to get a renewed taste, you take your chance to softly bite her under lip and attempt to gain entry with your tongue. You soon start curiously exploring every inch of your lover’s mouth, frolicking around with her own tongue in a friendly match for dominance.

(1/3)

>>13451828
>Wanting someone who just lays there and doesn't care
Nah. Dated enough cold fish in my life to be turned off that forever.

>>13451834
As you explore her mouth, your hands haven’t remained innocent and have actively started exploring the rest of her body. It’s nothing like the body she used to show you, yet it somehow feels better. Starting from above you feel her small, yet soft breasts to fit well on her small and delicate body. Moving on you slowly explore her body to the bottom, kneading and massaging every inch of it and causing her to squirm and moan from pleasure. You make no exception for her small but round and soft ass and her surprisingly thick thighs, kneading and massaging them thoroughly.

As you hear her squeal from pleasure and feel her grip on you tighten you move on to her sacred pink flower. As you touch it’s petals you realize how wet and slippery she already has become. With your attention shifting to her flower the kiss between you two ceases, allowing you to fully shift your attention to the sacred place between her legs. In a quick and sudden roll, you put yourself on top of her and bring down your head down towards her now soaking slit. You can feel her shudder and shake as you refuse to even hesitate a moment and assault her sacred place to drink its juices. A soft yet sweet smell penetrates your nose as you lap up and drink her love juices, causing the delicate girl’s body to shudder with each lick.

As you fully satiate yourself with her juices you move your head away from her flower and remove your boxers with a single pull, releasing your member to the world. Looking towards your lover you see her eyes being glued to it, silently giving you permission. You carefully position yourself over her delicate body and interlock your fingers together with hers. You need no words to understand how much she wants this as her pleading eyes begging for more tell you enough.

(2/3)

>>13451785
I'd say more like this.

>>13451841
You seal your love with a single thrust as you insert your member inside her tight flower, resulting in a loud moan from your lover and a surge of pleasure racing through your body. As you lovingly look in each other’s eyes you slowly start to move your member around inside her cave, its walls seemingly squirming around you and causing light moans to slip from your lover’s lips with each movement you make.

As her walls of pink slowly adapt to your throbbing member you start to slowly thrust inside her. A moan escapes her lips with each trust you make, as you struggle to stay in control within the tight confines of her walls. As you build up the pace, thrusting faster and plunging deeper with each trust you feel her grip on your locked fingers increase as her body trembles from pure pleasure.

Soon you start losing control, and looking at the face of your lover you realize the same counts for her. As she hits her limit you can feel what seems like a shockwave flow through her body, causing the walls surrounding your member to clench together, causing your own limit to be reached as well as you explode within her and see your vision go white.

As you both bask in the afterglow you can’t help but stare at her ruby-red eyes and the smile on her face as you play with her hair once more, slowly entering the world of dreams. But before you can entirely slip away in a deep sleep, you hear her whisper the most beautiful words in your ears.

“I love you”

>>13451685
I look forward to more.

>>13451828
Necrophilia > Sleep sex > Apathetic sex
Apathetic necrophilia is doublebest.

>>13451854
>Apathetic necrophilia is doublebest.
But that's literally the same as 3dpd abuse of a corpse necropedo-kun.

>Wanting to be ignored during intercourse.
I don't get it. It it like a penis shaming thing?

>>13451834
>>13451841
>>13451847
Not bad for your first try.

>>13451859
An apathetic undead has an emotional connection with you, a plain corpse doesn't.

>>13451872
>apathetic
>emotional connection

Oh, so this is one of those things like where you say bully but don't mean it at all.

>>13451846
What's this from?
Google isn't giving me anything.

>>13451872
>emotionless with an emotional connection
Lazy English.

>>13451880
You're not having sex 24/7 dude. I'd prefer to fuck a cold corpse that's my friend and lover during the day than one that just decomposes when I'm not balls deep in her.

>>13451854
>>13451828
>>13451854

>TFW no one needs you

>>13451894
Get animals. Or a skilled job.

>>13451894
Feels good.

>>13451892
>apathetic
>friend
>lover

You really are just being lazy aren't you? This isn't about apathetic sex at all, it's one of those "She just pretends to be apathetic but really loves it and has to bite back her moans." sort of deals.

>>13451886
The Library's Forbidden Zone, by Saida Kazuaki.

>still no gentle pirate monster girls like sea bishop

>>13451909
Which part of
>You're not having sex 24/7 dude.
don't you get?

It's one of those sort of deals where she can't feel anything from her slimy rotten corpsepussy but loves me with her working mind.

>>13451925
First "apathetic lover", now "gentle pirate".

Are you guys for real?

>>13451899
Skilled job?

>>13451930
Of which the example picture you gave is a chick who ripped out her soul so she doesn't feel anything with either.

>>13451934
You should have been here last thread, people were arguing about salt and gold for four hours.

>>13451834
>"I never had to think about it"
>"I just asked mgg what to do 6 hours ago"

Ever since someone mentioned cleaning under a Wurm's scales, I've been interested in seeing stuff about monster girls getting cleaned. Is there anything like that outside of EMG?

>>13451941
No, I saw.

Needless to say, I did not gain any insight from that nonsense.

>>13451944
some guy made some how to clean your mgg guides, Id link it if I had it

>>13451925
>"Ah, excuse me, we'll be taking you cargo now, I'm sorry about that but we have to do it"
>One of her crewmates whispers into her ear
>"Oh, and could you all please take off your pants? My crew would really appreciate it if you had sex with them"

>>13451936
Something where people depend on you doing your job right and actually showing up.

>>13451951
>gentle kidnapping and rape on the high seas

This is my fetish.

>>13451949
>thinking The Great Ones are fucking stupid

>>13451944
>>13451950
There was also that guy who wrote about polishing a Holstaur's horns.

>>13451944
I know some writefag was going to do a "guide to cleaning monstergirl waifu" thing, but that was ages ago when it was mentioned. Before the move to /jp/, even. I have no idea if it was ever done.

>>13451956
That's really specific.

>>13451939
>MGE Lich
>>chick who ripped out her soul so she doesn't feel anything with either
>literally loves her husband more than sorcery

Just stop already, you're really reaching here.

>>13451964
It's a hard fetish to fulfill, yes.

>>13451965
>MGE Lich
She doesn't feel any of it unless you smash her vessel and return her soul to her body.

>>13451970
>She doesn't feel any of it unless you smash her vessel and return her soul to her body.
>Due to this, they can enjoy pleasure and maintain the capability for calm, objective thought
Oh wow, it's almost like you're making things up because you don't like someone else's fetish.

>>13451942
>>13451834
I'm sorry anon, I couldn't write it earlier as I had other work to do.

>>13451864
Any advice?

Anyway here is it pastebinned if anyone cares:
http://pastebin.com/6mLZGyZm