/jp/ - Otaku Culture

She's a cartoon

>>12125159
your face is a cartoon, nerd

anal

Stinky anal bitch

patchy a shit

>>12125164
>>12125168
>>12125174
pls no bully ;_;

Books and old closet air.

>>12125156
patchouli

>>12125200
but patchouli smells like hippies

Lavender.

semen

>>12125184
I want to dig my penis into Patchouli's tummy fat!

Chemicals, dust, toxic heavy metal, and strange herbs.

>>12125234

What is Patchouli's favorite hip hop artist?

Please don't molest the Patchouli!

>>12125246
She's got taste, so Biggie, with Wu-Tang Clan in second. Cypress Hill when she's feels like it. In before people post a bunch of mediocre underground rappers with no flow

>>12125246
wutang niqqa

>>12125246
Knowledge Dogg

>>12125246

Wizard Khalifa

>>12125246
Atmosphere!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMBMgxUw6YQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4zvYLxZuf8

>>12125246
Dälek with Faust

I want to fatten up the patchouli, is this wrong?

>>12125272
Yes, but it can't be helped. The Patchouli will be fattened.

Please do not sexualize Patchouli.

>>12125279
The pole must go higher.

>>12125283
What is she going to do?

>>12125283
I'm sorry but I can't help it ;_;

>>12125272
As long as it doesn't harm her health. How does obesity affect Touhous?

wake up see this, what do?

Patchouli is fat! Just like a pig! Oink oink!

>>12125301
Wonder why I'm sleeping upside down

>>12125306
But piggies are adorabe. You're telling me you wouldn't want to snuggle up with a fatty patchouli?

>>12125319
I do, but I also want her to be embarrassed about being a fat piggy. I think it would be cute!

>>12125306
I want to dominate Patchouli!

>>12125301
fuck it, unless you already did last night

>>12125337
Why would that stop me?

>>12125337

>>12125156
Salty milk and coins

>>12125347
I'd drink Patchouli's salty milk.

>>12125348
w-why would it be salty..?

>>12125352
She's really bad at Hisoutensoku.

After much thought and research, I have determined that if Isaac Newton were alive today, he would post on /jp/ and Patchouli would be his favorite Touhou

would you read patchouli a good night story?

>>12125373
Only if they're lewd ones.

>>12125371
You might be right. He was a bit of a socially inept shut-in, right?

which touhou would tesla like?

>>12125380
He'd probably at least want to talk to Tojiko and Iku about how they make lightning.

Who would Lovecraft's favorite 2hu be? I've got a few ideas.

>>12125384

Yukari or Koishi.
He'd hate Suika, though, reminds him of the negro.

>>12125384
He looks like he's about to punch the camera guy.

Patchouli is a good girl.

She reads books in the bath and has a clean, feminine scent.

She has a maid and a small devil to serve her.

>>12125387
If the camera guy was anything but 100% Nordic it's probably true. He wrote a whole short story about how blacks, Asians, and those who associate with them are evil and scary.

>>12125392
I wish I was 100% Nordic...

>>12125388
Why would you read books in he bath? Theyd get wet?

Patchouli is a girl.

Girls don't masturbate.

>>12125374
What kind of lewd stories would you read patchouli?

>>12125397
The Plump Patchouli and The Naughty NEET

>>12125396
You don't know that. She probably secretly reads lewd novels while flicking her bean and then flips the page with the same hand.

>>12125401
I never understood the phrase "flicking the bean". What bean?

>>12125397
>>12125398
>>12125401
Lewd behavior is not allowed at the Scarlet Devil Mansion.

>>12125427
the clitoris

>>12125427
The clitoris.

>>12125429
>>12125430
What is that?

>>12125432
a proto penis

>>12125432
youre cute

>>12125398
What's that one about?

>>12125434
What do you mean? Do all girls have that?

>>12125156
Cute ballsack, Patchy

>>12125439
>not liking puffy vulva

>>12125439
I want to suck on Patchy's balls.

>>12125438
Yes. All humans start off as female. If there is a y chromosome the clitoris combines with the urethral opening in order to develop into the penile shaft.

>>12125456
I used to be a girl??

>>12125156
it smells kind of like old people + cinnamon, at least to me.

>>12125378
Yes, he was reclusive and didn't seem to care too much for socializing. While he did join clubs and societies, I think that they were more of a necessity back then and if Isaac was still here today, he would prefer to just stay on the internet. He also died a virgin.

He was fascinated with the occult and alchemy, so an attraction to Patchouli only seems natural. Keynes said that "he was the last of the magicians."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaac_Newton%27s_occult_studies

>>12125380
Reisen for her ability to manipulate wavelengths.

>>12125476
We're all little girls anon.

>>12125476

Hi I heard you use to girl? will you friend me that's girl?? (´･ω･`)

>>12125510

Hello? do your bewbs bounce when in p.e??

>>12125430
how about I manipulate the boundary of my fist and your face

>>12125517

You magical girl?? will you be grillfriend??

>>12125476
Yeah, it's pretty crazy. We were all little girls at some point.

>>12125514
M-maybe..

>>12125528

We erp now in chat?? Too embarrassing...dies. mc disappear now erp over such life but worth meeting you :3

>a-anon, she said I was fat ;_;

>>12125551

you are fat

>>12125561

Patchouli, as a youkai witch, does not need to eat or drink anything.

As a result, she is pleasingly slim and has a very feminine figure.

>>12125602
Maybe I like the idea of burying my face in patchouli's tubby belly.

>>12125156
Just like her library unless she decides to put on some heavy grape scent.

Chubby Patchouli is a miracle of this universe.

It's the greatest thing.

>>12125625
you mean wine?

She smells like roses and fresh baked cookies.

I happen to be an expert on the subject.

I have these at home, they smell like nice flowers. I light them every day.

>>12125156
Old ink and books, with a touch of lavender and just a slight hint of fecal matter.

What does Patchouli's feet smell like?

>>12125156

like sex and candy

>>12125761

like peaches!

You know don't usually like butts since poop comes from there, but whenever I see that image I just want to lay my face onto Patchy's butt~

I think anal loving would be great with Patchouli because she wouldn't have to deal with the pain of her first time. Unless she has already "experimented".

>>12125813
Why patche is always portrayed into anal stuff?

she is an asthmatic girl and I think intercouse could kill her, especially if we're talking about anal sex

>>12125831
I have asthma, and as long as you keep harsh physical activity to a low you're usually fine. Though puffers are most likely not available in Gensokyo, I'm sure Eirin could brew something up to help.

Besides, Patchouli is a very mysterious girl, she may be into a ton of different things.

does she have 2 koakumas?

>>12125813

Patchouli is a girl.

>>12126279
That boy is pretty ballsy

Spurting thick and sticky ropes of burning hot semen deep inside Patchy's innards!

I want to eat pie together with Patchouli, then snuggle with her and read books together.

>>12125669
Found this in my garage the other day, smells like some shitty indian bushes.
Kinda explains how Patchy is worst 2hu

>>12128116
My mother has some oil diffusers around the house, and a bunch of scented oils. She puts the Patchouli one in alot and asks if I like it, then says she asked because it's Patchouli like the character.

>>12128139
How does your mom even know about 2hu?

>>12128189
I told her about it
Also we went to Japan together two years ago

You look around the library, searching for the one source of light in this gloomy place.
Ah, there it is, a small clearing in the man made forest of books and dusty shelves.
She's sitting there as always, surrounded by books and reading one by the soft orange glow of a candle that never seems to go out.
You approach her from behind, slowly sneaking your way behind her...
You gently grab her waist from behind and she gives out a little yelp before realizing who it is.
A small warm smile crosses her normally apathetic face as she looks back to you and says "Ah, so good to see you again.".
You instinctively draw yourself closer, hugging her around her neck as you rest your head on hers.
She gives out a approving deep murmur, you can tell she's smiling, even if you can't see her face.
You bury your face into her hair, taking a long deep smell of her odor.
And then you throw up.

>>12125394
She has waterproof books she reads in the bath.

>>12125669
I have those too! They do smell quite nice.

>>12128263
>She has waterproof books

I don't remember her having that spellcard.

>>12128270

It's not a spellcard, per se. From the wiki, "She also has waterproof books that Marisa finds interest in reading in the bath."

d-do you think patchouli like cuddling?

Do you think Patchouli likes smoking?

>>12128400
she probably hates it because asthma

>>12128226
>Patchouli
I want to come in her butthole and wipe her rear after she shits out my semen

>>12128605

Please do not sexualize the Patchouli. It makes me very sad.

>>12128644
But she's the lewd one.

>>12128650

You mean Sanae?

>>12128653
You heard me.

>>12128660

Please stop. She would never even consider doing something like that. She'd die.

>>12128391
Yes.

>>12128660
Patchy is sexy!

What's a good Patche doujin?

No futanari. No yuri.

Is it strange if i want to bury my face in there and smell it but i don't really care about fucking her or not? Would do it too but if i had to pick i would rather smell it.

>>12128763
http://exhentai.org/g/537375/2d2e03214f/

Would you take responsibility for a pregnant patchy?

>>12125476
Holy fuck I didn't know that.

>>12129255
Sure, m8

>>12125456
Holy fuck I didn't know that.

>>12129345
It's also why men have nipples even though they are useless to them

>>12129352
MIND=BLOWN

>>12129352
The gender develops after the nipples in the womb, stupid.

>>12129360
Yeah, that's what I said.

>>12129367
Right, I'm the stupid one.

>>12125271
My nigger
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqcuLsdnRU8

>>12129381
thanks for this

>>12129255
If I was the father, yes

>>12128660
oh god I want to feel those breasts against me when I hug her.

>>12125246
KRS-One, aka The Teacher.

Patchouli smells like SUCTION♂

>>12125267
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIbIBYnAQNQ

>>12125156
knowledge
>>12125246
Canibus although KRS-One was also correct.
>>12128400
I don't think she would smoke and even if she did she wouldn't be smoking menthol thats for sure.

>>12125246
She probably listens to Eric B. & Rakim.

>>12128663
I want to lewd patchouli

>>12132958
Would you lewd me instead?

>>12131460
You don't think she'd smoke w-weed would you anon?

>>12132986
Nah, she's more of an opiates person.

>>12132990
Kinda wanna do beer bongs with Patchy

>>12132986
>>12128400
Why does everything you post involve Marijuana?

>>12133015
He's fishing for attention, same as most people who post figures like that.

I would consume hallucinogens with Patchouli.

>>12133015
>Tobacco
>Marijuana

>>12133031
that's about right

>>12133031
How would you comfort Patchy if she started tripping out?

>>12133042
I would hug her gently, telling her everything is alright. Of course, that's if I'm not freaking out myself.

>>12133052
You're better off just cuddling and listening to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yc8XcaPVG9k
>the only one I could find of Arato's cover

>>12125761
Probably nothing since she flies around instead of walking.

>>12125246

>>12133168
Why is Patchy flying when she could be sucking my dick?

>>12125156
Veggies.

>>12133219
Fuck you.

>>12133312

>>12125246
Slick Rick since he has an eye patchy

>>12125301
Sniff her feet.

>>12125347
Coins?

>>12125551
There, there. She only insults you because she hurts inside and wants to feel better about herself.

>>12132986
Just stop. Please. I don't know if you're trying to be edgy or if you're just one of those xxweedsmokesorandomlolblazeitxx people but there is no reason for marijuana to be all you talk about.

>>12125840
Isn't it canon that Patchy was trying to magically cure her asthma, but immortality was the closest she could get?

>>12128206
Did you visit the onsen together?

>>12125301
Hugs!

>>12134132
Hugging fuck, I get it.

>>12132996
>corona
>budweiser
>weed
is it even possible to be this pleb?

>>12125301
Sniff her butt.

>>12133516
How is weed even edgy?
I think you need to calm down.

>>12134330
It is.
I prefer stouts and IPAs but hey, free beer is good beer

>>12135046
It's people who make it edgy, not the weed itself. And you posting about it constantly doesn't help. I'm not trying to start a fight, but if you really need to do that then you can go to /weed/

>>12135060
Its just those 2 pics
and if I'm not posting those 2 pics then I'm usually posting my sweater
Other than that I don't really post other shit

>>12135122
Well if that is all you're posting you should stop posting

>>12135134
I thought it was okay to shit up a shitty board

>>12135046
What is this from?

Patchouli, old books and a hint of sweat I'd imagine.

>>12135161
No, that's what makes it shit, see?

She smells like a big, stinky poop poop!

>>12136447
No you!

>>12136447
I'll fight you nerd!

>>12136614
I want to feel her tongue on my cock.

>>12132990
I think she's into benzodiazepines.
About opiates - I like to imagine Yuuka having a huge field of poppies next to the sunflowers.

>>12128206
Are you the guy who went to Reitaisai with his mom?

>>12125397
The 120 Days of Sodom

>>12138970
Indeed I am.

>>12125202
Patchouli is an herb.
Hippies like herbs.
Witches are hippies.
Patchouli is a witch.
Therefore Patchouli is also a hippie, and smells like herbs.

>>12141174
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Fuck you

>>12135224
Also she smells like cum, because she's always inviting guys into her room. I've never seen the same guy twice~

>>12128226
I bet that smells so satisfying.

>>12125503
>Keynes
I don't know who that is, but apparently he never heard of Arthur Waite, Samuel MacGregor Mathers, Aleister Crowley, Eliphas Levi, Austin Spare, Peter Carroll, Grant Morrison, Gerald Gardner...

Patchouli is an idol!

>>12141189
You took me off guard with that shit.

ctrl-f Patty, no results

>>12141957
Why Patty? Isn't as cute as Patchy.

Question : what the hell is she wearing here?

I can't decide if it's a weird apron or a weirder bondage nightgown.

Patchy is a pretty good Touman, not the best, but pretty neat.

>>12144968
Looks like some really weird pajama.

Patchouli's warm, hairy, gooey, sticky vagina!

>>12144968
It's an apron. It just looks like it has leg holes or something sorta resembling underwear.

>>12145598
>hairy
I was eating you fuck!

>>12125476
>>12129263
I thought intelligent people posted here.

>>12148041
wow get out anytime

>>12148058
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, no, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

>>12133185

I'd imagine Pache would listen to something more intellectual.

And be elitist about it.
I wouldn't dislike that.

>>12125605
that could be it

Does anyone have that cute picture of patchy with the SICP book? The one from /prog/

>>12157549
Is that a fuck you joke? because no matter how you read it, Muck you doesn't sound like むきゅ unless you really try to hear it that way since muck makes more of a ま sound than a む sound.

>>12157745
It's a mukyu joke
>>12128263

You should study more joke otaku! Ganbatte!

>>12157549

Why would she have a picture of Marisa

>You will never knock over Patchy's bookcases and see how she reacts

I love patchy

>>12158624
With all of my hate, I would kick down Patche's door and stand there menacingly with a clenched fist. With my bloodshot eyes, and grizzly 5 o'clock shadow face, I would pierce my eyes into Patche's. I would slowly approach her as she fell on her butt in the corner of the room with teary eyes. Biting my lower lip ever so slightly to draw some blood, I would continue to stare at her. Then I would slowly approach her crying wide face with my face with a deep scowl and tell her that she is a good person and that she is very lucky to have such good friends at this mansion. Then I would turn around and knock down all of her books as I walk out the door.

>>12159063
Dude what the FUCK

>>12159065

>>12159067
Edgy.

>>12159067
looks like someone failed to clone patchy

>>12159063
>>12159067
>>12159099
Whattafuck man?
Patche doesn't deserve this, even if she's the worst SDM

>>12159067
On second thought that pic is kinda hot... would skullfuck.

>>12159330
>worst SDM

Did we play the same game?
Do we look at the same fanart?
Do we read the same doujin/ extended canon by ZUN?

clearly you made a typo and meant to type Meiling right?

>>12159342
>Meiling
Stop right there, faggot. Hands off the only SDM that is both good-looking, lovable *and* not a bitch.

>>12159365
>the only SDM that is both good-looking, lovable *and* not a bitch.
That would be Koakuma

what makes her such a secondary magnet?

Would read a book with Patchouli?

>>12159330
>worst SDM
I think you mean best

>>12159099
No big deal. She still can give blowjob and paizuri

>>12159334
thats a bretty small gondom :----DDDD
she gonna fug a little boy? :D:D:D:D:D

>>12159690
Condoms are elastic, nerd.

But I guess I shouldn't expect a virgin to know that. LMFAO

>>12159666
This is highly relevant to my interests

I don't know, but I know dirty hippies smell like patchouli.

Stop bumping this thread you assholes, every time I see it in the catalog I have to fap.

>>12159063
>>12159067
>>12159099
MORE! MORE! MORE!

>>12159566
Yummy feet.

>>12159998
I'd post some, but I'm pretty sure I'll get get banned for this.

So have a link instead :
http://www.mediafire.com/download/i7pbdf3b11jijmq/2hu+Ryona+Guro+V2+-+331+pics.zip

>>12160003
I already have that. Post more Patchy feet then.

Where ya' going, boy?

Patchy
Soft
Belly

Patchouli is sickly. She does not have a shapely figure.

>>12125156
blood sweat and tears

Patchouli recently changed her name to "Patty Sausage". Please acknowledge her decision and call her by her new name: Patty Sausage.

>>12160145
What the hell? You made me laugh and I don't even know why I find that so funny.

>>12160052
>>12160137
>>12160142

delicuous patchy legs. I think she'd probably let me squeeze her thighs while she is reading a book

>>12160537
>that left leg
Terrible.

>>12148058
I actually laughed

Patchy making lunch for you. Is it any good?

>>12162079
It's made with Patchy's love. I'll tell her it's delicious, even if it's not.

>>12125246
ｶﾗｼ!

>>12162781
Gross.

>>12125246
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NohEn_Axusk

>>12162942
Nice clip. It's way better than his shitty movie

>>12162951
I want to hug her.

>>12162781
erogenous zone

>>12133031
this is something I agree with

smokes and booze aren't conducive to asthma and a weak constitution, but mages do hallucinogens all the time. just ask /x/

>>12163341
>conducive
Hello kaceytron

>>12125761
i don't know, but i'd love to smell them and find out.

>>12157549
You mean this one?

>>12164219
thank you

>>12160040
That was one heck of a doujinshi series.

>Touhou girls as sluts in Tokyo!complete with orgies and creampies!!

>>12167835
Not the prettiest feet, but passable.

>>12125156
I want to rim patchy to sleep every night.

>>12125156
Like patchouli flowers.

Patchouli smells like fresh-baked pastries and sweets.

Patchouli smells like mukyuu~ and love

>>12168121
Ah. Much better. The feet are getting there. On a side note, what does mukyuu smell like?

I bet she smells like blueberries

>>12168165
I want to hug her in a bikini