/jp/ - Otaku Culture

don't lost you're burg

>>11888055

>>11888059
that is neither tenshi nor is it a corndog.

>>11888055
i want to fuck the burg

Is this the burg thread?

>>11888284
Welcome

Burgin! lol

>>11888284
y loli cryin?

>>11888436
She hasn't had burg in a while and is crying tears of joy.

>>11888436
Because she missed eatin tasty burgs. Or maybe she was on a diet, but her love for burgs overcame her.

>>11888447
poor loli suffering from her diet i feel bad for her

>>11888439
>>11888447
yokata i thought she was sad bout somethin lol

>>11888436
thinkign of burg

are burgers now called burgs?

i liked it when they were called hamhams

If you saw a loli looking very sad outside a burger store because she didn't have enough money for a tasty burg, would you buy her one?

>>11888460
You can call them whatever you'd like. Burgs are a lifestyle.

>>11888472
yes or i would share mine with her
i dont know if i would cut it in half though or do it the other way so we could share indirect kisses

>>11888472
But good gentlemen and kind hearted strangers don't exist anymore. Only sick perverts and pedophile murderers who want to hurt children.

>>11888480
wow not true dude

>>11888480
>>11888478
Wow. My face when a sick pervert already posted before I could.

This is the world we live in.

>>11888472
That depends on whether she is overweight. I would not wish to contribute to her health problems.

>>11888478
I would buy her the biggest burger the store could sell! Then her eyes would lighten up because she had that whole burger, all to herself.

That reminds me of when I went to a movie theater with a friend of mine when I was very small. My friends dad asked me if I wanted a drink, and he got me an extra large drink, which must have been almost half my height! For a 5 year old, it's like a dream come true.

>>11888488
I don't think indirect kisses are all that bad, but it is a little lewd!

>>11888480
that's just what places like fox news and /pol/ brain washes you to think

you dont nearly hear the same amount good things as you do with bad because it is more interesting.

>>11888502
i like going out of my way to help people because thats how adventures start and i wont get arrested

Nazrin is a... a... uh... oh my!

every time I see these threads it makes me want to go out to five guys and get two huge ass burgers.

>>11888502
You can't fool me. I lived in a society where kids trusted adults and everyone was more open with each other.

Nowadays everybody is paranoid about being mistaken for a pedophile.

>>11888504
Please don't do lewd things to innocent kids to satisfy your sexual urgers.

>>11888511
you already have aspergers, LOL

>>11888511
My burger consumption has increased because of these threads. A week ago I had two Big Macs and tonight I had six White Castle sliders.

Where the HELL can I get some decent burgs in Canada?

>>11888511
What if you put one huge ass burger on top of the other huge ass burger? Then you'd get a huge huge ass burger! And in the process, your ass would get huge as well.

>>11888522
Your ass would get huge only if you're a girl.

>>11888511
filthy west coast scum

let me keep my delusion that the majority of the posters are from glorious east coast

>>11888521
Her fries are touching the tray, gross.

>>11888516
Over the past week, my burger consumption went up since finding out that you could ask for pickles on burgers at In N Out.

>>11888516
y-you're turning all those excess calories into muscle though, right?

>>11888451
what the f*ck
btw do /jp/sies play LoL and hearthstoned?

>>11888531
Do you think I'm gay or something? Why would I want muscles? I can barely maintain a normal weight as is so I just sit around and eat burgers and sweets and hope I don't turn into more of a skeleton.

>>11888529
Please double check your posts so you could quote accurately.

>>11888521
Make your own! I use:

>1-2 packs of lean or extra lean ground beef
>A handful of finely diced onions, or shallots
>One egg
>Some extra spices or herbs of your choice, maybe some chopped rosemary

Once you've mixed those all together, make some nice patties in whatever size you want. Be warned, the burgs will expand a lot through cooking, so I like to make my patties pretty flat. Always make a small indent in the middle of the patties before cooking, so they don't expand too much.

Cook them in a pan on medium high heat with some olive oil to prevent sticking, a few minutes on each side. Then you can add whatever you'd like to your homemade burgs! Oh I almost forgot, the secret to making your burgers nice and juicy is to not press down on them while cooking, no matter how tempting it may seem.

>>11888533
You can get grilled onions too! And animal style fries are amazing! Those are fries with melted cheese on top, grilled onions on top, and spread on top! They're really really tasty but they look kind of gross...

>>11888540
Don't call me out like that, I learned my lesson dude.

>>11888542
Are you kidding me dude? If there's one thing I've learned from /jp/ its that little girls love burgers and muscles.
All I have to do is hit up a burger joint post-workout and I'll leave with a new loli girlfriend each time.
Make sure you wear a cool hat too, that helps.

I write to you today a broken and pitiful man. My head has spent the last 6 days in my hands and my dreams lay broken at my feet. In what was to be a digestive alley-oop, it was found last Wednesday that I cannot buy a bucket. My friends, I was burgin.

Before I go into details, I'd like to talk about what burgin is and, more importantly, what it isn't.

burg•in (adj.)
Experiencing the intense need for a huge, gnarly burger. "Man, I'm burgin"
Passionately consuming a burger or burger. "Oh yeah, I'm burgin!"
Recovering from burger overindulgence. "Goddamn it, help me, I'm burgin!"

Have you been thinking about getting a few burgers for dinner ever since you woke up? You are burgin.

Did you just decide on a whim to pick up a combo meal for lunch today? You are NOT burgin.

Do you have the urge to eat burgers until your jaw gets tired, and have you felt this way for days? You are burgin.

Does a burger sound kinda, halfway, sorta-ish good right now? You are NOT burgin.

Have you been doing that thing where you're talking to somebody and they begin to look like a burger to you? And you go to compliment them on their shirt and you end up saying something about lettuce? You are burgin. HARD.

>>11888545
Making your own burgers is always the best. My favorite ones are the ones that I make myself. Oh god, they're just so good.

I don't do anything crazy, just some light salt and heavy pepper seasoning, cook both sides for 6 mins about on a HOT grill and then roll the buns around in grease and crisp them up a bit. All they need is a little iceberg lettuce, tomato and mustard.

>>11888552
I'd like to try something like that but I don't like the spread they use. I actually get mustard instead of that. They do look a little gross. I want to try a 2x4 or whatever.

>>11888542
How light are you anon! I was excited when I found out I went from 93 to 103 lbs over the last half year!

>>11888510
I want to eat her burg!

>>11888545
What? No, damnit! Don't make burgers like that. You want at least 25% fat in a burger otherwise it will be dry and/or taste like cardboard. You just need a bit of salt, some pepper, and maybe some onion or garlic powder in the burg meat. The meat will actually shrink/contract like all other meats when cooked, so it's better to make a burger thinner otherwise you'll end up with meat balls. Use a good for pan frying like canola or peanut oil so it doesn't burn, but not too much. You want a nice crust on that burg so don't cook it at too low of a temperature.

My autism is cooking so please trust me on this.

What are some things you should never put on a burg?

>>11888575
Mayonnaise. Ever. Mayonnaise is the most disgusting thing humans have made.

>>11888561
>little girls love burgers and muscles.

Burgers yes but not muscles. You're lying.

>>11888566
On my burgers, I just like to add some red onion, grainy dijon, and a little ketchup. Sometimes I add a little bit of mixed salad if I have some lying around.

>>11888575
"American" mustard, it's the worst. Same on hotdogs, but I don't really like hotdogs to begin with. Unless I'm downtown and I buy it from a vendor.

>>11888545
That seems more like meatloaf than hamburgers.. I'll try it anyways!

>>11888576
What about egg?

>>11888580
You're going to have to trust me on this one friend. I don't want to blog.

>>11888588
Little girls do not like muscles and no matter what you say cannot change my mind.