/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Youmu Fact #828: It's natural for her to be interested in dicks.

>>11344339
I don't believe you.

Youmu Fact #828: the above fact is false, she secretly is a boy

>>11344349
>>11344351
Which is real?

>>11344386
The first. She IS a girl, after all.

>>11344386
both, but >>11344349 is really the fact #829

What's fact 1?

>>11344441
#1: yumo a shit

>>11344441
Youmu Fact #1: Youmu is a dork

>>11344351
Facts can't be false. All facts are true by definition.

>>11344452
they're just misspelling it
these are actually Youmu Facets.

>>11344441
#1 Youmu is the softest.

>>11344441
That she's shit.

Youmu Fact #452: Youmu has the smelliest feet of any Touhou, and she is very self-conscious about it.

>>11344486
Even smellier than Patchy's?

Youmu Fact #12: Youmu prostitute herself

>>11344452
Fact: this fact is false

>>11344339

nerd.

And girl's have nasty, sticky, gooey vaginas! Ugh. Youmu is ruined for me...

Youmu Fact #198: Youmu masturbates four times a day on average.

>>11344560
I'm a girl and I don't have one of those...

>>11344664
I believe it! I'd love to catch her in the act.

Youmu Fact #371: Youmu loves mayo

>>11344676
So you're a qt trap then?

>>11344339
Youmu fact #200: Whatever the ghost half feels, she feels too!

>>11345619
So if Youmu was going to make a speech in front of a large crowd, you could have sex with the ghost and Youmu would feel it?

That would make for a wacky sitcom plot!

>>11345628
How do you have sex with a ghost?

>>11345632
Stick your penis in it!

>>11345628
Humiliating Youmu is not ok.

>>11345648
Yeah, it's great!

>>11345628
Yep.

>>11345671
No, it's bad.

>>11345668
I'm not sure where to save this, my lewd folder or my not so lewd folder.

>>11345632
Like this!

Youmu fact #315
Youmu's favourite date spot is the waterpark

Youmu Fact #4: Youmu isn't virgin

>>11345682
The thing my sword cannot pierce are next to none!

>>11345711
Youmu Fact #5: Youmu lost her virginity on her wedding night

>>11345725
Youmu Fact #6: She was married with a tentacle youkai.

>>11345758
Youmu Fact #100: Youmu died at the age of 25 in an unfortunate sex-related accident when her tentacle youkai husband accidentally drowned her in semen.

>>11345791
Youmu Fact #101: Youmu was revived by Yukari and Yuyuko two weeks later.

>>11345791
How does a ghost die, that doesn't even make sense.

>>11345873
She's only half ghost. If she half-died before, she could die completely.

>>11344339

Youmu fact #16
Youmu had severe chuunibyou growing up. She's worked hard to destroy all evidence.

damn I was never too much of a Youmu guy but now I'm feeling all fuzzy inside, /jp/ what is this?

>>11345889
>If she half-died before
But she didn't, she was born that way.
And she's already older than 25.

>>11345945
it seems you like boys

>>11345962
>older than 25
She's very youthful.

>>11345980
Youmu fact #205
Youmu is a beautiful beautiful christmas cake that's as fresh as the day she was baked.

>>11345980
Yes, but she's older than she looks. Half-ghosts mature slowly.

>>11346001
Ghosts don't age what are you talking about.

>>11346004
Maybe she matures at half speed? So if she's like 30, it would be like 15 for a fully alive person.

>>11346011
That would make sense.

Do note; we don't know exactly how old she is, but it's younger than 60. Looking at her and how she matures slowly, I'm just guessing she's older then 25.

Youmu fact #957: After Yuyuko went bankrupt, Youmu provided for herself by prostitution for several years.

>>11346001
Youmu is around 60.

>>11344450
>>11344450
>>11344450
>>11344450
>>11344450
this. youmu a dork.

gets invited to parties out of pity

>>11346443
At least she gets invited in the first place.

>>11346443
I'd invite her to a party to try to pressure her to sex.

>>11346449
You shouldn't do that! Just say hello to her!

>>11346489
She can be talked into things.

>>11346489
>implying a beauty like Youmu would give me the time of day

>>11346305
Youmu fact #958: She got pregnant twice during that time.

>>11346499
I-is that her soul?
What happens to a half-ghost if her soul gets taken?
Can humans handle the soul?
What happens if I rub my dong all over it?

Youmu Fact #63: Youmu is the third most bullied Touhou in Gensokyo.

>>11346566
Who are the most and second most bullied?

>>11344339
>Feeeeeeeet... ;_;
Dude, why are you crying?

>>11346555
shirikodama

>>11346573
2. Remilia (CHARISMA)
1. Wriggle

>>11346573
1. Satori
2. Tenshi

Moar Youmu feet, pls.

>>11346574
Becasue he'll never feel their softness.

Youmu Fact #20: Feet that are smellier than Youmu's are next to none!

>>11346595
>tfw disgusting huge nasty boy feet

>>11346618
You shut your filthy whore mouth.

>>11346634
W-what?

>>11346554
Youmu fact #959: She had to be interred at a psychiatric hospital for several month afterwards, as her psyche was completely destroyed by all the turgid members she took.

>>11346446
when was the last time youmu hanged out with reimu marisa and sanae? even kasen and the fairies hang around with the miko more

she only got invited to one party because of yuyuko

youmu a dork

>>11346573
1. Sanae
2. Kyouko

>>11346670
>2. Kyouko

who?

>>11345679
The rule of thumb is "am I going to fap to this?"

If you answered yes, l00d. If not, not l00d.

>>11346687
Yamabiko scum

Youmu fact #1012: Youmu is working hard to defeat Sanae

This thread should be way cuter! You need to make the facts cute by using exclamation marks!

>>11346934
At whoring?

>>11345679

no nips or vagoo, not lewd

>>11347106
There's /jp/ lewd and /a/ lewd. You can get away with posting tits on /a/ most of the time.

Youmu Fact #2: Youmu hates you

Youmu Fact #1651: Youmu caught a fish!

>>11347131
Youmu Fact #3: Youmu is a stone cold killer to people she hates.

>>11347133
With her bare hands? Cool.

>>11347133
Youmu Fact #1652: Every anon wants to be that fish!

>>11347152
no i want to be youmu

>>11347133
>>11347152
Youmu Fact #1652: Youmu loves smell of fish

i want to be myon

>>11347152
Why is brown youmu so much more sexual than regular youmu?

Youmu Fact #268: Youmu's dream job is slutty succubus office lady.

Youmu Fact #55: Youmu is Yuyuko's bitch

>>11347165
Youmu Fact #1653: Youmu's vagina smells like fish.

I question the accuracy of most of these facts.

>>11346949
Exclamation marks are lewd, not cute!

>>11347194
Youmu Fact #1654: Youmu loves to smell her own vagina.

>>11347194
S-Stop!

Youmu Fact #15: Youmu is fertile.

>>11344339
ACTUALLY, Youmu is in fact HALF-girl.

I don't like this thread.

Youmu Fact #57: Youmu half-died after being brutally raped in her natural youth.

>>11347160
Would you have sex with me if you were youmu?

>>11347174
ur a faget

>>11347223
no i have to stay pure

>>11347174
brown skin is lewder than white skin

Youmu Fact #88: Youmu is a nigger

>>11347210
sure she is >>11346554

the fuck is going on here

>>11347214
You and me both.

>>11347214
me niether

>>11347240
But is she fertile anymore, after all those pregnancies, drowning in squid semen, mindbreakage and assorted misfortunes she's suffered?

>>11347244
None of those things happened.

>>11347251
But they're Facts!

>>11347255
Not really. They're just stuff people made up and are calling facts.

Youmu Fact #23: Youmu has devoted all of herself to serving lady Yuyuko.

>>11347232
What if I politely asked you out on a date, would you accept?

>>11347273
it depends~ :3

Youmu fact #47: Youmu had her first orgasm in a gangbang during her prostitute years when an acid youkai ejaculated in both her eyes. She developed cataracts as a result.

Youmu Fact #1112: She doesn't know I love her.

Youmu Fact #22676

Youmu was the ghost writer for the 2002 hit "Always on Time" by Ja Rule featuring Ashanti. She came up with the famous lines "Baby, I'm not always there when you call, but I'm always on time. And I gave you my all, now baby be mine".

Now how about that for a Youmu fact.

i think you made that up, faggot

>>11347282
Youmu Fact 48: Youmu made so much money as a prostitute that she is still living off those savings.

Youmu Fact #442: Myon rapes Youmu every time she goes to sleep.

Youmu Fact #99: Youmu secretly enjoys being humiliated, but will never admit that.

>>11347337
Youmu Fact #100:Youmu can no longer reach orgasm without being abused physically or mentally.

>>11347282
>>11347313
>>11347337
>>11347342
>>11347328
So edgy.
You shits really take all the fun out of molesting Youmu.

Youmu Fact #453: Youmo likes the smell of a males foot and likes to be trodden on.

>>11347337
yum orange juice

>>11345791
>>11347342
>Youmu Fact #100:
wut?

>>11347290
>ghost writer
I get it!

Youmu Fact #454: Youmu can only have sex with an average size male with her urethra. Her other orifices are too torn and distended from her colorful life to exert any pressure on an average penis.

>>11347354
That's an obvious printing error, one of those should read 700.

>>11347347
I meant Youmu, of course. Much embarras.

Youmu Fact #202: Youmu is very irritable when she's on her period. It's best to keep away.

>>11347398
I want to fuck monster Youmu ;_;

Youmu Fact #999: Youmu has had a hard life.

>>11347360
edgy

>>11347409
we all do

stop it you guys

>>11347415
>You will never feel Youmu's monster claws crush you to death as you lovingly stare into her black eyes and kiss her bleeding mouth

Youmu Fact #999: Youmu has had a hard life.

>>11347418
b-but bullying Youmu is so fucking funny

>>11347419
fuck this world

>>11347430
Yeah, but this is an incredibly low-tier bullying circlejerk. It's stupid.

>>11347431
I'm seriously okay with any cute black-eyed monstrosity bleeding from every orifice. I wish my house had a girl ghost haunting it.

>>11347435
This is 4chan what did you expect?
If you want better, you'll have to come home, hebrew man.

Youmu Fact #24: Youmu is a slut.

>>11347435
What's high-tier Youmu bullying then?

>>11347443
Good question. It's not this, though.

>>11347443
Playful sexual teasing until she gets all flustered and wet!

>>11347443
The conversation that starts with >>10845904 comes to mind.

>>11347436
like any other sane person would. I personally would like to spend whatever time I had left against the body of a monster

Why is Youmu the cutest fumo?
Is it because they almost rhyme?

>>11347362
Xerox, what the hell are you doing?

Where can I subscribe to Youmu Facts?

>>11347565
it has to be a mutual feeling!

>>11347274
Depends on what?

>>11347567
If it was a mutual feeling and we went on a date and the date went well and we kept going on dates and I proposed to you, would you marry me?

>>11347561
/jp/ developments

soon Sakuya and Sanae facts
maybe Yukari and Reimu

>>11347581
well yeah, isnt that how these things work?

>>11347426
poor youmu
living with a black hole jerk, take care of a stupid garden, being bullied all the time and deal with perverts every day. is just a shitty life

There's not enough 半霊オナニー pictures.
Fact.

>>11345619
>>11345873
>>11345889
>>11346001
>>11346004
>>11346555

Konpaku fact #1
The Konpaku are half-phantoms, not half-ghosts, which are different species in Touhou. Phantoms are not "dead" (they are spirits born of emotion; a death is an emotion event that tends to spawn them, however a living creature can create a phantom, and on a particularly striking death, multiple phantoms may be created), although they do not belong in the world of the living.
A half-phantom is therefore a being that is in between the world of living and dead, but still unquestionably alive.
Ghosts are the spirits of the dead who have an attachment to the material world, and it is impossible to be half-ghost.

>>11347601
And if we had a nice wedding and you got to wear a pretty wedding dress, THEN could we have sex?

>>11347730
tomayto tomahto

>>11347772

They aren't the same at all.
It's a vagueness at first glance, but ZUN confirmed that yuurei and bourei are not the same existence.

>>11345619
>>11345628
To say that "Youmu/she would feel it too" is a bit misleading. Youmu's ghost/phantom half isn't a separate entity, and her human body isn't "Youmu" anymore than the ghost is. Both are one being, and both are Youmu. Of course she would feel what you do to the ghost, she IS the ghost, just as she is the human.

>>11347793
I was actually referring to whether one would use the English term "ghost" or "phantom" to translate "yuurei".

Youmu Fact #90: Youmu is a bit airhead

Youmu Fact #237: Youmu has functioning male genitalia.

>>11347882
Why bother censoring it?

>>11348543
I want to lick dat poonanie

>>11348565
Youmu doesn't like people talking terrorist.

Also this is the worst fucking thread ever.

>>11348590
>Youmu doesn't like people talking terrorist.
????

>>11348605
>poonanie
means vagina in some brown language

>>11348543
Careful, dude! I actually got banned once for posting that exact same image.

>>11348620
Comedy mods.

>>11348620
>3 days

This is fucking horseshit, I got banned for 2 months for that image, not even joking.

Youmu Fact #378: Youmu is ambidextrous.

>>11346953
>whoring

I think the answer to that is a resounding YES.

Youmu fact #1012a: Yuyuko is training Youmu to defeat Sanae.

>>11348783
They both have lost

>>11347337
Fact #1 about me: I want Youmu to drink my urine!
Fact #2 about me: I want to drink Youmu's urine!

>>11348865

Nah, they're just taking leave from being playable characters because they're both busy sucking dicks.

>>11347430
>>11347435
I thought you were supposed to masturbate to these threads. Don't tell me I'm the only here doing it for sexual arousal. First Sanae and now this.

>>11349298
What? Ok, I won't tell you?

>>11349302
The concept of a character being a slut is something to masturbate to. I've never viewed it as an appropriate tool for making fun of characters you don't like, and I never will. I will continue to take pleasure in people's posts about how so and so is a slut though, but doing it as a joke seems completely pointless.

Bullying Youmu ist verboten.

>>11349325
>ver·- bo·- ten
>1. Forbidden, esp. by an authority

What THE hell

>>11349349
You heard me, punk.

I'd just like to interject for a moment. What you're referring to as half-ghost, is in fact, half-phantom, or as I've recently taken to calling it, phantom plus human. Ghosts are not a separate entity unto itself, but rather another subset of phantoms popularized by early photography and cinema.

>>11349324
Fair enough.

Youmu fact #1: Youmu is a dork

Does Youmu have big boobies?

>>11349797
She has a modest chest size.

>>11348865
amen

>>11349801
Youmu fact #715

She has a perfect chest size

>>11349324
Well I've posted a number of disgusting Youmu Facts and I love her.

Youmu Fact #716: Youmu has a perfect butt size.

>>11350001
Actually, I think I have some kind of bullying fetish. I want to spread malicious rumors about Youmu being a used-up slut on the internet and then comfort her when she cries because of it.

>>11350026
Youmu fact #22: More than half of all Youmu facts are made up on the spot. They are artistic works of fiction and falsehood that only a fool would take seriously. Which ones? Use your best judgement!

>>11350074
I'm pretty sure that the “Youmu is a girl!“ one is a solid fact.

>>11350079
I'm not sure. I must see more evidence.

>>11350084
Would a boy have such delicious thighs?

>>11350084
Youmu fact #741
Youmu was once impregnated by giant bugs
Only girls can get pregnant

if you stick it in her ghost half does she feel it?

>>11350169
We've been through this already maaaaan
>>11345668
>>11345682

>>11350297
This one's better.

one day i want to have sex with a half ghost girl just once just to see how it feels

Youmu Fact #554: Youmu once had to take a role in Wreck-It Ralph for extra money.

>>11350976
>>11350297
It looks like Youmu is getting off on being drowned! What a dirty girl!

>>11353163
You could say that she's getting all wet from the excitement.

>>11350984
>one day i want to have sex with a girl just once just to see how it feels
fixed

>>11353483
Sex with Youmu!

>>11353523

>>11353523
Youmu fact #386
Everyone who has sex with Youmu has part of his soul drained to fill her ghost part.

>>11353535
>>11347730

>>11353554
u fac no1
ur a faget

Youmu fact #1735: There's way too little porn involving Youmu expanding her orifices with Myon.

>>11353595
I would prefer a nice hentai about sex, if there is one, there's no use for the ones with bad drawings.

>>11353535
I want to watch Yuru Tuhu so bad ;_;

>>11353523
Cumming inside Myon while watching Youmu react is my fetish.

>>11354089
That's my fetish too. We can run a gangbang on Myon from every angle until Youmu's mind breaks.

Youmu fact: Youmu knows men. Lots of men. The biblical meaning of "know".

>>11354107
I trust you have photographic evidence of this

>>11354123
Her mouth says no but her myon says yes.

>>11354100
Please don't.

>>11354124
Myon is a ghost and doesn't talk. It does no such thing.

>>11354140
It can talk just as clearly as hips or other body parts.

>>11354153
Well it still doesn't say yes.

>>11354157
Yes it does. It always does. Even in this picture it's screaming out for cocks.

>>11354164
Lies. That's all in your head, anon.
Don't deny it. You're the one obsessed with sex.

>>11354172
Youmu is all hot and bothered under that cool facade all day erry day. I want to ravage Myon until she's on the verge of orgasm and then kiss her lightly on the forehead to bring her over the edge.

Youmu fact
Youmu is a technical virgin, as she has only given out myonjobs to her clients

>>11354182
You'd like that, wouldn't you?

>>11354197
I'd love to kiss her forehead, yes. At any time, under any circumstances.

>>11354202
I meant the first part.

Forehead kissing is...not fine, but better than the rest of what you're talking about.

>>11354206
Yeah, that too whatevs
The forehead kissing takes priority.

>>11354202
Would you kiss her forehead right after I rub my smegma coated dick all over it?

What if you steal Myon and use him as a daki every night. Youmu would feel so warm and loved.

>>11354235
She would be more distressed that someone stole half of her. She needs that half!

>>11354111

I'm so hard right now. Dat Youmu.

>>11354514
d-do you need help? I think I know how to make boys cum from reading comics...

>>11354537
you're a grill?

>>11354537
S-sure. Come over then, I g-guess.

>>11355134
What does that even mean?

She's a hardcore, candystore, gimme-some-more GIRL!

>>11353163
I think that's the rope digging into her crotch.

>>11354107
>The biblical meaning of "know".
Last time I "met" your mom she told me that she knew you.

>>11354107
the bible is such a lewd book. it should be banned, it's inappropriate.

>>11354107
>The biblical meaning of "know".

>Some people say things like: "It is not correct that it is the
biblical meaning. The biblical meaning of a man's knowing a woman
is such total love as to know all about her, which includes
intercourse. It is not an evasive term for one-night stands."
>Not so. The Biblical sense of "to know" is simply "to fuck", as
you can see from Genesis 19:4-8 : "[...] the men of Sodom
compassed the house round [...] and they called unto Lot, and said
unto him, 'Where are the men which came in to thee this night?
Bring them out unto us, that we may KNOW them.' And Lot [...] said
[...] 'Behold now, I have two daughters which have not KNOWN man;
let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you [...]'"
>The Hebrew word here is yada (yod daleth ayin). The Greek
word gino:sko: is used similarly in the New Testament.

>From the use of know in the Bible. Some Bible translations, such as the King James Bible, translate the Hebrew word ידע as know even in sexual contexts, giving rise to lines like "And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived."

Fact: Yuyuko gets Youmu drunk and takes advantage of her.

>>11360830
What does that mean? Girls can't do sex together.

I wish I could make art. I want to make a youmu/aeka shiraki crossover art.

Is Youmu a girl?

Youmu fact #1012: Youmu is working hard to defeat Sanae

>>11366021
Yes. Those are definitely girl's feet.

>>11366058
i have feet like that but im not a girl
what gives?

>>11366154
C-Could you be a girl for me?

How would Youmu react if I disguise my penis like a part of the sword? I'm imaging her to touch it again when she surprises

>>11354235
My girlfriend stole my myon and uses him as a daki every night.

And now I am myonless.

>>11375498
kill that bitch!!!

>>11375499
I can't bring myself to, she looks too cute with it.