/jp/ - Otaku Culture

I'd let my danmaku talk for me.

You're right.

They'd probably eat me.

>>10551541

that picture made my day

I'd let my dick talk for me.

It's not that I wouldn't have the balls, it's that I'm too socially inept to just chat up and befriend someone I don't know and don't have any real reason talking to.

So I would start my time in Gensokyo by donating at the shrine enough for Reimu to befriend me, and then have her introduce me to other touhous.

They have H&M there!?

Probably true op in regards to the more stronger ones, but I can see some of the lower stage bosses being curious enough to approach you. A human from the outside world is interesting stuff.

>>10551571

that was the first thing I noticed. H&M is very nice!

>>10551541
I was going to sage and type a witty response but I suddenly felt awkward just looking at this image so now I know it to be true.

>>10551585
No it's not. The quality of their wares are subpar at best. I'm happy I've only been to one twice in my life, but believe me - I've still seen the horror that is their ''collection''.

>>10551616
I shop mostly for winter clothes there that don't look like piles of shit.
They're pretty good.

>>10551541
輝夜姫、私。。。

>>10551625
I'm sorry for insulting you, please forgive me!

>>10551541
that picture is fake! moukou and kaguya would never go shopping like that!

>>10551635
Ok :)

I'd let my monster dong do the talking.

>>10551635
>>10551639
fuck off

>>10551636
Mokou has no money and Kaguya has no friends, sounds like a quid pro quo to me.

I want to be their flamboyant homosexual guy friend who is secretly hetero.

That mokou needs more talismans for her hair.

>>10551616
>No it's not. The quality of their wares are subpar at best.

whoa ok nerd ass. we're not all living off our rich parents and shop exclusively in expensive shops!!!

although i wouldn't buy anything apart from plain basic clothes, I find h&m has a nice fit and good styles of the basic t shirts etc.

>>10551572
They also happen to be fucking delicious.

>>10551572
and then they left after 5 minutes

>>10551541
Say that to my face and not online etc etc

>PS3s already appearing in Gensokyo

I'd believe this.

>>10551708
They'd probably stay longer if you knew how to make some technology from the outside world.

>>10551710
They never do! This was even remarked in one of the books.

>>10551666
>h&m has a nice fit

>>10551541
jokes on you OP

ill be marisas best male friend

>>10551728
Hes right!

I bought a button up long sleeve shirt from there and its one of my favorite shirts, it was also only $10. I've been meaning to leave the house to get more but the store is very intimidating to enter because of the cashiers and people walking around helping.

>>10551702

Y-You too

But I don't want to go there specifically to talk to them.

Gensokyo has NO GAMES

>>10551851
truly epic /v/ro

>>10551736
I've heard that there exist self-catering cashiers in Britain.

>>10551860
Please do not respond to trolls.

>>10551868
I'll respond to who I want to respond to, cocklord.

>>10551860
you just fell to my epic trap /jp/ew

>>10551880
Please don't misuse spoilers.

>>10551887
_________________________ ___ ___________________ _________ ________________________ _ FUCK YOU_ ____________ __

>>10551899
Put a spoiler on this.

>>10551851
>>10551876
>>10551880
>>10551899
>>10551922
These posts also violate global rule 3, Mr. Janitor.

>>10552391
The janitor singles out the people he considers to be the scourge of /jp/ and bans them on sight for the best reason he can come up with.

>>10552391
>being a tattletale

>>10551861
Self check out machines? Yeah, but only in supermarkets and a couple other random stores like Boots.

They have a scale in the bagging area to ensure you're buying things properly and if the weight isn't correct, it'll refuse to proceed and you'll need to flag a worker to come sort it out. This is guaranteed to happen at least once in every transaction.

>>10552450
>This is guaranteed to happen at least once in every transaction.

Every fucking time.

What am I doing wrong? Even if I hit "I don't want to bag this item" and hold all my stuff like an idiot, the machine says "approval needed" at some point.

This is a pretty big bug, surely?

h&m is the only walk in store around here that has extra small clothes in mens'. if i didnt have h&m, id still be buying my shirts from the boys' section. i still have to buy my pants there, though.

>>10552520

I've never had a problem with them, myself, even if I've got my own bag. I just pile the stuff up in the bagging section, then put it into my bag after I've scanned everything and paid for it.

>>10552450
>>10552520
Never had a problem at my store, I just push the bags aside and dump my shit on the weighing circle.

I do all my shopping at 11:30 PM and use the self-checkout.

>>10552572
>>10552574
I guess I'm just unlucky.

Fuck you, ASDA. You finally invent a way for me to be asocial while shopping, then you force me to ask someone for help anyway.

Youmu would be the easiest person in the world to talk to.

>>10552572
>>10552574
You guys have it good. I have to nearly starve myself before I dare go grocery shopping.

>>10552591

are you a dork?

>>10552591
I'd think you would be able to relate to Sanae the most.

>>10552603
whys that

>>10552603
I would talk with her about my super robot if you know what I mean.

But I don't want to talk to Touhous, maybe just happen to walk by some and chat or danmaku with. I think it'd be fun to bug Reimu until she exterminates me though. Or maybe go to Underground and party it up with some of the oni that may or may not live down there.

>>10552611
Because she is normal like you.

>>10552599
Can't you just buy in bulk then?

>>10552611
She lived in the outside world once

>>10552616
That wouldn't fix anything.
In fact, it would make things worse since I would dread even more the day I have to go grocery shopping.

you know that theyd just laugh at everyone that comes here. theyre women, why would they be any different

>>10552633
Most of them are youkai and maybe when the portal opens we'll all become girly youkai too.
Just maybe, or you'll all stay ugly nerds or become faceless men or canon fodder.

>>10552633
>here

You mean you've already found a way?

>>10552597
Probably. There isn't really anything wrong with that.

>>10551571
it's a decent store for cheap clothing

too bad most of it is too big fo rme :(

>>10552615
Normal is Subjective, How many 'normal' girls do you know that are gods? How many of them cause miracles? Do you even know a girl?

>>10552719

Sanae isn't even real, nerdlord.

>>10552727
Then how are you classifying her as a 'normal'? Comparing her to other women in the human village, I'd say she's far from normal.

>>10552727
>real
but she's right there, in front of my computer screen I can see it, it exists.

Is that America or Japan or somewhere else? All malls all over the world look the fucking same.

>>10552753
It's South Korea.

i gota say, that pants wraring touhou is kinda ugly. i dont think ive ever found myself attracted to it. maybe the fire fart has something to do with it.

>>10552757

At first I thought those were Muslim women with burqas. I was about to make a bad joke about how they would blow up in the name of Allah, reciting things such as "allalalalalalarakatanahamarabaassalamualakyuboom".

>>10552757
that pants wraring touhou.

>>10552770

Of course, the best idea is to find and befriend Rinnosuke.
Since it is semi-canon that real world technology ends up there, and he collects them, show the youkai how the real world works.

Or just become a bard, traveling around and telling tales of the outside world.

captcha: aDolan Wood

>>10552790
I care faggot, kill yourself.

>>10552779
Nobody gives a flying fuck about your captcha, /b/-kun.

>>10552790
Don't talk to your fellow tou-bros that way, the last thing we need is to be at each other's throats (we gotta stick together).

>>10552779
Semi-canon? What?

Well, assuming you go in Gensokyo one day in the near and middle future, it would probably with virtual reality. As such, you could be absolutely what you want in Gensokyo, and that makes the balls to talks to the touhous far easier.

>>10552579
This happens to me quite a bit at my local Tescos, I put my things one by one gently on the machine weigh thing but it'll goof up and I'll have to look over to the workers and wave my hand a bit at them.
It's a bit embarrassing, more so when there's a decent queue behind you.

Don't EVEN talk to me about self-service machines.

Indeed they are a double-edged sword of sorts. Allows you to avoid check-out socialising, but can push you into normalfag corners of the worst kind.

My worst experience recently was holding up about 9 people at shopping rush-hour (5pm, my stupid fault) by being slow, then having to stand around like 5 minutes waiting for help cause it was telling me something was wrong with my bag, then having to wait another 5 minutes to show the angry Tesco lady my ID, which is also very embarrassing because she's there being angry all the time and probably knows I'm an alcoholic now.

Oh and the STARES that day. The stares. The sheer impatience. The repulsion. The disgust on the faces of all those people wondering who the fuck I think I am for holding up ordinary working folk in order to buy cake and booze. They knew. They all knew and they hated me.

Almost enough to cause an eruption of turdblasting in one's underskiddies.

>>10557259
stop over thinking shit

no one was angry at you
no one was disgusted

>>10551541
>touhou

>>10557259
I know those feelings, Niggy-san.

I always feel like I'm being judged when I have to show my ID. One time in Tesco it screwed up weighing my items *three times* and a different assistant came each time. All of them asked to see my ID, even though the first lady had approved it. It was just uncomfortable, and the well-adjusted people around me probably got a good laugh out of it.

Also I never feel like I'm worth holding up queues. The worst is a coffee machine in the library I go to. It's a fairly popular machine, but the coffee and milk drip out super slowly, then you have to add sugar/toppings, stir, and get the very-awkwardly-shaped lid on top properly. I always end up holding a queue of five people or more. It's awful.

>>10557259
It's great living near a 24 hour Tesco, I can take as long as I like fighting with the self checkout machine at 4am and hold up nobody

>>10557273
I worked in Sainsbury's and I judged people all the time. I also hate when some faggot takes forever on the self service machines, especially when there's a queue.

Stop projecting. Some people are human beings, not emotionless robots.

>>10557276
>It's a fairly popular machine, but the coffee and milk drip out super slowly, then you have to add sugar

Cannot do this. All those normies staring at me. Thinking "how dare you even eat our food?". Judging all my choices. Wondering how someone can be so awkward.

I give it 6 months before I can't do anything but online shopping, this just gets worse rather than easier with age

>>10557306
I'm already at the point where if a queue forms behind me I pretend to change my mind and walk away until there's nobody around. I bet they're watching me, though. They know I'm not putting anything in that bin.

>>10557318

Had a man yesterday ask me if I wanted to go ahead of him because he had a whole trolley full of stuff and I was just buying 1 cake (I like cake). I said no and he was like "are you sure?" and I said no again. I wonder if I seem really polite or just retarded.

Times like these I'm happy to have /jp/, no other board understands these things.

>>10557333
David-san!

>>10557333
I'd prefer to suffer in silence. I don't like being there, but I don't care if I have to wait longer to buy my cake. I just want you to not talk to me or pay attention to me.

>>10552520
This has only happened to me once. And the was when I had barely touched the tip of the bag by accident.

That looks like a lot of fun, cosplaying as a Touhou with your friend and going to the mall to try on some cute clothes. I wish I could do that...

Please take your change.

Notes are dispensed below the scanner.

Thank you for using the fast lane.

>>10557349
Fag

>>10551702
damn straight i am ;)

Which Touhou would you UNEXPECTED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA. PLEASE REMOVE THIS ITEM BEFORE CONTINUING.

>>10557369
I remember once I was trying to buy some fruit juice, and the bagging area thing just didn't like it at all. Even after the lady did her ID thing it just said unexpected item etc, so I put it on the ground for the time being. After I paid, I picked it up and the same lady asked if I paid for it! What the fuck! You just saw me scan it. It made me feel so nervous... What if they think I'm a shoplifter now ;_;

>>10557384
You can never go to that shop again.

>>10557369

I like self check out lines because I don't have some girl trying to ask how I am. It also means I can walk in and out of the store really quickly because I know what I want to buy.

And of course I wouldn't talk to anyone in Gensokyo, I don't do it here to begin with!

>>10557385
>I don't have some girl trying to ask how I am.

A few days ago I bought beer and I was super tense and had my ID ready. I had everything planned but then I overdid it. The conversation pretty much went "Do you have y-" "YES HERE IT IS!" *whips it out*

After that she tried to be all casual. "Do you get asked that a lot? You seemed prepared!"

Fuck you. Bag my fucking beer and shut up.

>>10557391
You can also order things from amazon anyway

>>10557391
Yeah, I haven't been in there much since then... Thank god for ordering food online.

>>10557385
Have you considered the fact that maybe the girl thought you were good looking?

>>10557413
http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/field-keywords=bread

>Books

I can't eat these ;_;

>>10557408

>*whips it out*

>>10557425
I think he meant cashier girls in general, not a specific one.

>>10557425

Staff in supermarkets are often told by their managers to ask how your day is and how you're doing. Stop being a faggot.

>>10557369
This reminds me of that one time I went to the library and I was having trouble with the self checkout and it told me to speak to a librarian but instead I just put the book back and cried on the way home and I havent been back to the library since.

>>10557428
http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=sr_nr_scat_359865031_ln?rh=n%3A359865031%2Ck%3Abread&keywords=bread&ie=UTF8&qid=1362263292&scn=359865031&h=77d4ad1f9518d33f3bccc77505aa6240f25e51e1

There, you just have to select the right category.

>>10557440
Seems like the managers need to go to one of those training courses on mental disabilities, particularly Asperger syndrome and social anxiety.

>>10557356
H-hey don't be mean ;_;

>>10557445
Yay, thank you!

>>10557445
Wow, this was the first result.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sunnyvale-Sprouted-Wheat-Organic-Bread/dp/B0069L6CWE/ref=sr_1_1?s=grocery&ie=UTF8&qid=1362263426&sr=1-1
Isn't hemp weed? Are they even allowed to sell that?

>>10557458
"Hemp" is pretty much a euphemism for parts of the cannabis plant that don't get you high. It's usually used to make clothes and oils.

>>10557369

I prefer a human shit's far easier that those annoying fucking self service.

Notice how this thread went from generic 2hu nonsense to tru/jp/NEET discussion once the Brits arrived. We truly always have been the greatest posters.

>>10557333
I have a feeling that actually did more harm than good, rejecting someone trying to help you like that. He probably felt very awkward.

>>10557464
oi m8 u bein a cheeky cunt nd takin the piss do u want me to smack u in the gob or summing u little twat

>>10557276
>>10557318
>>10557333
>>10557384
>>10557385
>>10557408
>>10557411
>>10557442

I hope you're all underage

>>10557464
I honestly had no idea there were so many of us here. We should have a meetup sometime! It would be really awkward but fun at the same time.

>>10557481
I went to the BakaBT meetup in Yorkshire.
There were at least two other /jp/ers there.

It was fun!

>>10557476

oh god I think you're right

>>10557480
library anon here, I'm 22.

>>10557480
What? What made you think they're all underage? There's nothing which could indicate that. Social anxiety doesn't instantly disappear when you turn 16/18/21. If you mean underage by asking for an ID, maybe they're lucky enough to look underage.

>>10557481

>meetup

No, I would be tempted to attend but as a genuinely socially anxious faggot I bet I would just be standing there alone whilst you guys turn out to be extroverted normalfags doing stupid memes all day. Sorry but I don't think I can take that risk.

>>10557494

Fucking this, I'm not overly anxious in public but having to meet up with other peers from the same site is too much for me I'd be constantly worrying about the meetup.

>>10557491
Oh, I didn't know there was a BakaBT meet all the way up there! I'm down here in the west midlands hahah.

>>10557494
Well, you don't have to come I guess. It'd be rude and inconsiderate to make you feel uncomfortable with doing something you don't want to do.

>>10557494
We'd all feel exactly the same way, nerd.

This is a case where it's good to be British. We may be more "meta" with our cynical attitudes and whatnot, but we also know how to keep a stiff upper lip and not act like faggots. Sometimes taking it too easy and being too laid back just gets annoying.

>>10557507

I don't know, honestly. I am really autistic in person, not "joke" autistic. If I ended up finding out /jp/sies are all well-adjusted socialites in real life I would cry so much for so long. I don't think a tru/jp/sie would really attend something like this. But I don't know. I'm confused.

>>10557505
>>10557507
Well, all of us here haven't been spouting memes and shit so far, right? So it'd be easy to assume you don't do that in real life. We could just split off from the meme-spouters if any too.

>>10557493
Most supermarkets have a Challenge 25 policy (recently went up from Challenge 21). Some Tesco branches are experimenting with a Challenge 30 policy.
Basically if you look under 21/25/30, you get asked for your ID, even if you look over 18. Some places even ask for IDs no matter what, which has led to OAPs being refused sales.

>>10557494
The way I imagine a /jp/ meetup going is, everyone shows up to the meetup location but is too shy to say anything so you just end up with a bunch of dudes standing around waiting for the meetup to start until you slowly leave one by one, each of you thinking you were tricked into thinking a meetup was actually happening and you were the only one that arrived.

>>10557521
I'm the same. I know how you feel, but I'd attend a meetup if I had the money because why the fuck not. I'd feel anxious all the way there, I'd probably fuck up buying a train ticket, I might even cry a little, but I'd go just for the hell of it.
Then I'd shuffle around awkwardly and not say much and wish I was at home, but I'd still see it as "an experience".

>>10557526
Christ, are you serious? That... that's a bit much. How else are those OAPs supposed to relax after a hard day's work I guess gardening when they can't even get any alcohol!

>>10557537
They should have their Passport or driving licence on them. How else can you be sure they're not 15-year-old chavs about to sneak around the back of Tesco and start trouble with their friends?

>>10557464
this thread was made yesterday

>>10557536
>>10557530
At least we would try, right? That's what counts.
I was going to say maybe we could do something to try and distract ourselves from not knowing what to say, but I can't think of what. Maybe going down to a pub and having a nice meal and drink? But I guess there are chavs there and I personally don't like talking while eating.

... Why does the UK have to be so boring, hah.

>>10557546
From my (limited) experience pubs are usually just full of old working class people. Which can be more or less scary than chavs, depending.

We could go to one of those trendy gastropubs. Those are usually full of student types who are more annoying but less intimidating.

If you guy like to having meeting, please let me be invite....... If its okay. Hope.

Certainly, I would love drinking beer with some guy from /jp/...
Ah, maybe its only dream.

I dont think many people in this board may be from my UK area, anyway. Its remote area. (´・ω・`)

Minasan have fun ♥

>>10557546 here
Maybe we could just go somewhere and play Touhou and be nervous the entire time from being watched/judged. I don't know ;_;

If I ever went to a meetup I'd give it a pass by first to make sure nobody is wearing a trench coat or fedora then maybe move in for a closer look.

I remember seeing some kind of meetup in Southampton once outside the Waterstones in the city center. There was some fucking 18 y/o-ish white girl with black hair (not land whale, actually sort of qt) wearing a maid outfit. Fuck knows what there were planning to do though.

>>10557566

> make sure nobody is wearing a trench coat or fedora
>actually sort of qt

See what I mean? Not bullying you here, but I couldn't go to a meetup with people who think like this. I want to meet /jp/sies, not some random Touhoufags with disgusting /r9k/ mentalities like this.

Okay, BritNEETs:

If you're interested in /soc/ing it up, put a dot or a circle on this map indicating roughly where you are. Make the circle large if you're paranoid.

This probably won't go anywhere so don't worry.

>>10557560
You live in the UK too? I really had no idea there were so many of us here! I've been assuming nearly everyone was from the US or scattered around the rest of Europe.

>>10557553
Yeah, that could work.

>>10557566
To be honest, I don't think /jp/ would be bad for that. I think most of us would show up in jeans and T-shirts or something, and it would be pretty underwhelming how normal we all look.

>>10557576
I'm around here, in the countryside.

>>10557585
Heh, all I own are jeans, shirts and normal-looking jackets.

>>10557576
Anywhere in this general area.
Too much farther is scary.

Lonely up here (´・ω・`)

>>10557632
You're Scottish?

What the fuck.

>>10557627
Apparently a lot of people live up near there. I couldn't handle it though, much too cold.

>>10557632
Whoa, you're really far away. What is it like up there? I haven't been to Scotland yet.

Here I am, >>10557576

>>10557632
Lenfried most ichiban boyfriend confirmed for !DQN/aQg2wY's alter ego.

>>10557642

Yeah... I bet you guys are all English... (´・ω・`)

It's alright though. I'm a bit shy for these things anyway.

>>10557656
Filthy uncouth Scot, go back to your heroin and shortbread

>>10557576
I hope I count.

It would be nice if the UK was a bit smaller, we're all so far away from each other. Travelling is going to cost a lot, and we would probably have to spend the night at some hotel... I would probably be too nervous to sleep, hahah.

>>10557660

Traverse the seas! ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

>>10557662
Don't be mean! I quite like shortbread though. It's really nice.

>>10557671
I'm not traveling anywhere, because I have no money
NEETLYF

>>10557677
Apply for Employment and Support Allowance. You don't have to go to the Jobcentre to get it.

>>10557682
I live with my parents, I doubt I'd be eligible
I hate going to the jobcentre, I feel so pathetic.
I feel lying killing myself every time I go.

>>10557689
You should be eligible for it, unless they're incredibly wealthy.

Any train otaku looking forward to High Speed 2?

We'll all be able to meet up wherever we want in 2032.

>>10557689
>I live with my parents, I doubt I'd be eligible
Doesn't matter.

>I hate going to the jobcentre, I feel so pathetic.
You don't have to go. You have to go for one assessment interview with a private company. You can say you're housebound because of your anxiety and they'll come to you. You get paid a preliminary amount for weeks before this happens.

>I feel lying killing myself every time I go.
Tell them that.

>>10557698
I hope it isn't too expensive! Train tickets can be steep enough as it is. I'm glad the coaches here are at least somewhat decent.

>>10557689
go to uni and study at home

you are confortable at home then can study at home

>>10557698
I want High Speed 2, I hate the trains where I live
They are filthy and slow
I hate it on the news, where I hear people protesting it

>>10557698
How long did it take Japan to build their high speed rail infrastructure?

20 years sounds like a long time.

>>10557695
>>10557702
I'd be scared of being arrested for fraud or something
I'm not housebound, I don't like it, but I can go out

>>10557716
Maybe when I save some money

>>10557727
I went on a train for the first time ever a few years ago. I had no idea what trains were like. I didn't even know what they looked like. I thought they might be like those big metal steam trains but then they turned out to be shiny plastic-looking bullet things. The inside was awful, like a bus except more uncomfortable and more crowded. I was really scared and disappointed and wanted to get off at every station.

At least the views are pretty.

>>10557737
It's not fraud.

What are they going to do, read your mind?

You have a problem. You are the person benefits are supposed to be for.

>>10557744
google "train" next time

>>10557752
I don't know, they might investigate me, I can't exactly prove it
Going to a Doctor and explaining my problem would be horrible

>>10557385
Cashiers ask you questions in 'Murrica? Thank god I don't live there.

>>10557770
They just ask you questions. The assessment is handled by a private company, so they don't have access to your medical records.

>>9655221
Here's an Anon who used to work with the assessment company giving some good advice on the assessment. It should give you an impression of what they're like. They are strict, and they've attracted a lot of controversy for refusing benefits to some pretty severely disabled people, both with physical disabilities and mental disabilities.
You might have to ham it up. This does not mean lying about anything they can prove, but you need to stress that you can't work properly. The whole point is to determine whether you have a Limited Capacity for Work, not that you simply can't work or you can't walk (that's what Disability Living Allowance is for). ESA is basically like an extension to Jobseeker's Allowance for people who aren't just normal folk out of work.

Another thread shit up by the disgusting subhuman backwater creatures known as brits. Oh well!

>>10557827

Cause it was such a quality thread at the start, right?

>>10557815
Thanks for the link, I'll consider it but I doubt I'd be accepted
I find it incredibly hard to talk to people I don't know, so trying to convince someone I don't know to let me not work would be near impossible
I'll read through the post later though

>>10557827
Get out, American.

>>10557566
what if I get to wear a trench coat and a silly hat every rainy monday?