/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45915457 (2/3)
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B-But that shouldn't matter! It isn't the first time I've felt crushing loneliness or this intense hopelessness—under that pink tree… blood, mud, and rain—and there are ways out of this abyss! My child and I won't need to live surrounded by darkness, so far away from everyone in this world of mascaras and falsehoods—there'll be a father! There will! I won't let their future be of a pain comparable to mine… No, I'm their mother! All I have done is make sure they live in a happy, pain-free world! Their love will then be genuine, final and absolute…

… Otherwise, why did I do everything I have done?

What can I do? What can I change? What more can I control so the future isn't a vacate and cold world for them like it was for me? The HSE has done its job, but… Maybe I should keep Anon with me. He'll be there for the stages of my pregnancy; he'll see my belly grow heavy with his seed; he'll hold me; and then… he'll love us. Yes, that makes sense! He'll love our children, me—our family!

But t-that's just the first step to guaranteeing happiness for my family… I'll have to take measures—by that point, I'll have my sword; I'll be capable of killing gods and making the world bow down to me; however, that'll mean nothing if death claims them. No amount of omnipotence will change a death by tripping on the stairs…

That means I'll need a safe place where not even natural death can threaten them. Yes, I can do that! I can create an environment safe from even the natural course of the universe! I can already stop their aging; I can maintain their healthy bodies with my Gaps, and they'll never suffer if I control every single interaction they have. And—for once—I'll be happy, because I'll be able to cultivate true affection in that safe environment where no disgrace would ever dare blossom.

My smile is anxious, my skin pallid like a cadaver’s, but I do not care!

To achieve that outcome, I'll just need to work harder and continue doing what I do. I've been like this for centuries, so more of the same is barely an issue—

—I meet Anon's eyes. They are dark with confusion: his shaking hand, which I hadn't noticed moving, holding onto mine, his grip gentle, yet also very frightened. His tender hold wasn't kindness born from the desire to see me happy and well. It was just his duty.

The plan I had made streams through my mind again, though now it carries a perplexing cynicism that fills my mouth with acid.

Because that plan wouldn't garner his love…

… Nor from our child.

My heart feels hollow, my throat swollen, and I clutch my belly tightly, praying that I'm wrong and that everything I did would end anyway in caring and warm love—that this cold and empty world would eventually subside. My thumb caresses the back of his hand, trembling a little, almost imploring… All I feel from him is a repressed desire to pull his hand away.

…

… Something. There must be something else I can do. Something I can c-control and—and—

Voices. Muffled voices catch my attention, and I turn to see Flandre and Chen coming in our direction, the latter's eyes bearing confusion, tails low and ears pressed against her head; but the former… There's authentic worry in her eyes. I get up, pushing the automaton out of my way—Anon yelled words I couldn't hear, and something deep inside my heart pulled me, lacing my blood in remorse, urging me to repent… I ignored it. So what if the thing breaks? I can build a new one—there wouldn't be a difference—and, gently, catch Flandre in my arms, lifting her from the ground with a sudden yet heartfelt laughter. Her immense red eyes broaden and her cheeks are beautifully rosy. A mirror to my overflowing joy.

… Love.

This is love; this is genuineness!

This is what I want to see in my child's eyes when this world, tailor-made for our family, welcomes it.

Flan says something, but it's lost to me as I hug her—

—she returns the hug, and at last I hear: she sounds all giddy. “Y-Yukari-san, what is happening~?!”

“I simply wanted to hug someone I like very much; Flan~is that a crime of which I wasn't aware?” I express it with a smile, rubbing our cheeks together. She giggles and I drink from it with fervor. Perched on my arms, laughing and blushing with adoration…

She looked so very natural…

My eyes rush to Anon, longing for him to be with us in this eternal moment of bliss, of true happiness—

—He holds Chen in his arms, her knee scrapped and bleeding; my eyes lock with hers, and there's a devastating sadness behind them. My smile fades, confusing shame growing inside—why?! It's just a shikigami—a machine! Its feelings are fake and can be c— “WATCH WHAT YOU'RE DOING, WOMAN!” Shocked, my eyes whip to Anon. He looks furious, pointing a finger at my face, brows creased, his body tall. “SHE HAS DONE NOTHING TO YOU—and doesn’t deserve to get hurt! I don't know what has gotten up to you, but you have no NEED to hurt her! You should be ashamed of yourself!”

And, with her in his arms, he leaves.

>>45613126
Are they allowed to use their powers? Yukari would thrive in transportation regardless whether it was in people or goods.

>>45432185
I bet Yukari's idea of sexy is going into autistic detail on various train models and their history.