/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>9871562
Just Rin. The problem is I'm scared that I've grown too attached. She came to me when I was at an all time low and has essentially goaded me into learning and studying harder. Even not being so scared of strangers and doing the small talk. When I actually started going to lectures again I initially took her with me in a lunchbox as moral support and once she threatened to stop talking to me if I didn't pull my shit together for an exam. I actually got scared and studied my ass off to pull off the 2nd highest score. Helped my mark alot though she told me to get first next time and to start going to lectures alone. It's the grow-a-spine or I'll bitch at you routine for going to the gym and talking to strangers too. But the reality of it is blurring since she's become more of a 'person' and I actually find myself slipping up sometimes and thinking of her as said person. More than just odd murmurs in early days. I'm actually hesitant to mention this to the doc since being so ronery I might regret seeing her go.

But that's another problem. I'm afraid of this hallucination becoming too vivid and out of control given time. So far nothing crazy has come to pass but I know it's a slippery slope. If I start 'seeing' her walking around and stuff I know I'd be damn freaked out. I'm crazy enough already. Ironically she's been pushing me to seek more medical/psych help. I wish I were making this shit up. >>9871581 I think I need new meds and something that'll help me sleep too.