/jp/ - Otaku Culture

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"About time! Awen't you kinda late for the thwead!"

"I need to take a nap!"

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Hey Watson, when awe you gonna play Gel-awshie's Pwo Fwuitboawdew?"

"Ya know, that doesn't sound too bad right now."

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Heawd you wewe gonna be playing some kinda block game. Watch out for Bad gwaphics ghosts and that fweaking duck that'll eat both youw pixels!"

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Yeah, can you investigate Senow Cawdgage?”

“Sir, I investigate Myths, not strangers.”

>”TeRtIARY!”

“...I’m catching the next flight out.”

>"Homestaw Wunnew."

"Yes, I'm investigating the myth of someone in Free Country, USA named "Dijjery Doo" an-"

>"No idea who you'we talking about."

"But He's featured here in this book "Homestar Runner goes for the Gold" an-"

>"Still no idea what you'we talking about. Nevew heawd of this guy and he's cewtainly not shoved in a box in my shed."

"But-"

>"Gotta go, bye!"

>"Hello, you've weached the Homestaw Wunnew."

"I say Homestar, butt's twelve by pies?"

>"Ooh, ooh! I got Amelia to say something stupid! The Gwumble Cakes will be mine!"

"Wha-? Oh god damnit."

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Hey Watson, I heaw you've been losing youw cool lately! When I need to wegain my game face, I just have some Smawty Juice!"

"Homestar, that stuff expired in 2007."

>"Made by a faceless Mega Cowp, with a couplea hills in the logo, Faw out!"

"...Side Effects include 'Soothing Children's programing", weird but not too bad sounding, I guess?"

>"Alwight, faw out...!"

“Watson Detectove Agency.”

>”Yeah, I was just gonna theow in some icebewg lettuce, nothing fancy, nothing fancy.”

“Homestar, does this phone call have a point?”

>”Maybe a little Catalina, nothing fa-“

*click*

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Yeah, can You sing the theme song to Night Couwt?”

“Does that song even have lyrics?”

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Hey Watson, did I evew tell you about the time I got punched by a walking stack of Swiss cake wolls?”

“Wha-okay, go on.”

>”that’s about it. Man, those things awe bad fow you.”

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Hey Watson, I weally like that one giwl's Pikachu outfit!"

"...I don't even know who you're talking about."

>"Wait, weally? Squeaks like a tea kettle? No?"

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Hey Watson! I weally like youw fwiend's Tom from Tom and Jewwy costume!"

"I... There are so many people that you could be referring to-"

"It's Tom! and! Jewwy kids! That's whewe all the action is!"

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Hey Watson, I weally like youw fwiend’s Bugs Bunny costume!”

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Hey Watson, I weally like youw fwiend’s Ghostface costume!”

“Ghostface...? Wait, are you talking about Calli?”

>”Yeah, yeah. You like scawy movies and all that!”

“Try again, Homestar.”

>”Oh, okay. Hey Watson, I weally like youw fwiend’s Bloody Mawy costume!”

“...you know, Calli would probably take that as a compliment.”

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Hey Watson, I weally like youw fwiend’s Ultwos costume!”

“Homestar, try again.”

>”Oh, wight. Hey Watson, I weally like youw fwiend’s Owthwos costume!”

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Hey Watson! I weally like youw fwiend's Wonald McDonald costume!"

"Ronald Mc-wait, Homestar, are you talking about Kiara? he's not supposed to be Ronald McDonald!"

>"Oh, wight. Hey Watson, I weally like Kiawa's Wockafiwe Explosion costume!"

"Wha...I'm so confused."

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Yeah, I heawd you'we looking fow games to play on stweam. well luckily fow you, Videlectwix has plenty of games to stweam!"

"Um, I have plenty of games to stream right now Homestar, but-"

>"Awe you saying thewe's no one in youw gwoup that would like Peasant's Quest? ow Kid Speedy? ow Stwong Bad's Cool Game fow Attwactive People?"

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Yeah, who the heck needs a Poopsmith? Who wakes up and says “I think I’ll get a job shoveling what’s-it fow a living.”

“Someone adept in dealing with a lot of crap, apparently.”

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Yes, I'm the client who sent you the infowmation about the cweepy painting in my fwiend's bwothew's closet?"

"Ah, Yes. I passed the information along to my occult specialist..."

>"Go on."

"And it is definitely Occult in nature. and she seemed to have a hisory with it, mumbling something like "That was for Bradley"

>"That is weiwd."

"And that will be $3999.95, plus tip."

"Watson Detective Agency."

>"Hey, Have you seen Doweauxgawd? I haven't seen him wecently and I'm wondewing if he finally went solo."

"What does he look like?"

>"He's a cantaloupe on a pencil."

"Well I can already tell you He's not dead."

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Oh. Man! Have you heawd about this amazing new intewnet phenomenon called Planking?”

“Homestar-“

>”It’s going to be awound fowevew! And I’m gonna be doing it forevew!”

“Homestar-“

>”It’s gonna be etched into the halls of histowy! Gotta go!” *click*

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Hey Watson, can you use some help? I’m kinda hawd on cash since my website stopped updating as much.”

“Alright, what’s your resumé like?”

>”I’ve got gwit, gumption, and an adowable speech impootaboot!”

“Hmm, sorry Homestar, I’ve already got all those things in Bubba. Anything else?”

>”A twelve pack of business account ones?”

“Eh, that’s more of Calli’s thing.”

>”Oh, hew? She won’t take my calls aftew she met Stwong Sad and Coach Z. No idea why.”

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Hey Watson, you want some Owange and Black flavored Malloween mawshmallows?”

“Homestar, those marshmallows are just dyed orange and black.”

>”What? This is an outwage! This is wowse than when so found out Stwong Bad’s homemade ice cweam was made with souw cweam and not cottage cheese!”

“Watson Detective Agency.”

>”Yeah, I used to have a yellow shiwt with a duck on it, what evew happened to it?”

“You stopped wearing it when you pulled your current shirt from your craw.”

>”Oh, I know that, but I haven’t seen it since Stwong Bad’s 100th biwthday celebwation.”

“Have you checked the store?”

>”yeah, Bubs stopped cawwying t-shiwts in his black mawket shop yeaws ago, now all he has is counterfeit mewch of this company called “Hololife” or something.”

“Well, have you-wait, WHAT?!”