/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>anon has no idea that his demon classmate has nearly a million different plans all currently in motion, some of which may or may not end up coming into conflict with each other and/or work against her, all for the singular goal of making him her boyfriend
>all he knows is that she has a habit of cackling to herself at random times, which he finds endearing

>>20789911
I don't have a "spacebattles side" and I don't want to harm monster girls. I just want to post some daemons.

>>20295192

>>19132371
If you don't break the rules you can stay
If anyone gets bitchy and you're just posting normal good stuff, they're the shitposter.

>>19117444
>>19117436
/tg/ actually hates 40k and it's only tolerated in containment generals
But I agree with you, /tg/ is one of the worst boards with the most autistic take-things-too-seriously posters, I just found your choice of wording inaccurate.

>get cornered in the hallway by a Tzeenchette
>"It's no use now, my dear, sweet Anon. You have no idea of the many thousands of plans I have for you, all currently in motion. I need but pluck a single string in this majestic tapestry I've weaved you into and, one way or another, you'll become mine. Forever and ever~"
>just then a khornette picks you up and throws you under one arm
>"C'mon, cutie. We're goin' on a date."
>"W-...Wuh? W-wait, come back! Anon's mine!"

>Tzeentch-chan is walking through the halls to class when she stops by the science room, suddenly drops her panties and braces herself against the wall the the astonishment of everyone watching
>then they hear you cry out from the science room followed by a lot of other ruckus
>you stumble out of the room, a mouse trap on your hand, a bucket on your head, your dick hanging out of your fly, and tripping over a tangle of cords
>you end up falling dick first into Tzeentch-chan's pussy
>"Geez, Anon, you should have just asked me out first," she says with a shit-eating 'just as planned' smile

>>16360710
better than tzeench-nee and her convoluted plans. it always starts with some mundane task like going to the store to get milk and somehow ends with you balls deep in her while she yells "just as planned!" as she ahegaos

>>16069076
Easiest way to draw ELH out is to draw a magic circle with a pentagram in the center, using black latex boots and a horsewhip as reagents. Then, lift up one of your legs up and hop up and down going "Ufufu Ilassa Ara ara ara" three times to a dark bathroom mirror.

If you're lucky, he'll manifest.

>>15941312
>Create an OC Lilim
>Remember that in some variations, deities gain power by having the faith from their worshippers
>Give the OC Lilim your real name without giving it to others, using a faux human name
>Start to spread that she has her own OC Lilim that she uses to gain faith by preaching to a non-existent fictional populace
>The OC Lilim's OC's OC does the exact same thing
>DL's face when you're playing 18th dimensional chess and not having to lift a goddamned finger to accomplish anything

What if your life is being manipulated by a master-planner from a higher plain of existence?

>>15819789
>Not knowing Tzeentchian Demons

>Be Crusader
>Remove MGs like you removed the Saracen from your holy lands
>Be told by many of them that you're just a puppet on unseen strings
>They laugh and spit in your face as they're taken away in stocks
>Some to be sold as sex slaves to fat, ignoble louts
>Others to be relocated to their own homelands
>Receive word from a Sister in the local chapel about three exceptionally strong Succubi sisters who may ascend to near-Lilimhood in terms of strength
>Purge them in the maker's fire
>Each one dies laughing at you
>Lose your way, get haunted by visions of a great Crow
>Until one evening, with the fire crackling you see a hooded figure right out of your childhood nightmares
>A woman's voice tells you that you turned out much better than she could've ever expected
>A completely loyal husband who'd do everything to please her
>Try to attack her, your body won't move
>She flicks her taloned hand at you, blasting your armor off
>Her face keeps shifting, from your older sister to the first female Paladin you'd lost your innocence to, surrounded by hay in the stables, to even the Sister in the chapel
>Ask her why she chose you, struggling to stay upright
>Tells you the early bird needs not answer the worm
>Yell at her that she did nothing more than trick you and remove all possible competition through her foul machinations to which she just giggles and whispers
"Just as planned"

>>14541931
You certainly have wasted a lot of effort being a fool.

>>14141285
>Imfuckingplying

>>14127930

Plans within plans within even more plans.

>>13825851
You're a very smart Ork Mr. Wagh.

You should be careful in MGC on your business trip, the elves there are a bit..."dangerous" to your kind.

>>13771686
You primitive Apes are so easy...