/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>21561353
That's not nice

>>21379714
Lilim kids are scary!

Hello. Victory and Defeat, chapter 10.
https://pastebin.com/2wMX7RUC

As it turns out, the first chapter of All's Fair in Love and War is over two years old, and the last is over a year old already. I want to believe I've been improving considerably in the meantime, since after going back and rereading a few of the first chapters, it looked bloated, longwinded, with many things that don't need to be shown taking up space since the events would show up later on in the story anyway. I could rewrite it, but with how it's structured and how I already have the chapters uploaded separatedly, it'd take a great deal of effort and I might even have to reupload the entire thing again in order if I wanted to split one chapter into two.

So what I wanted to ask is, would there be interest in Victoria's story if I rewrote it in an actually readable format, or am I better off finishing Derrota's story and then sticking to oneshots?

For reference, this is chapter 1 of All's Fair in Love and War
https://pastebin.com/Raf2qHXL

>>20563550
You really seem to like her

>>20405766
Bueno.

Lolims are for ___/

>>20104306
>Derrota building a wall
Does she make the Order pay for it?

>>19923877
Not unless .less wants to, since he did it of his own accord. It's the Victoria wip that's gonna get colored, and there's the chance this one as well.
>>19923890
You wouldn't stomach bulge a lilim

>>19902215
>Derrota
>Esdeath expy
>Not Tanya Degurechaff expy

>>19865101
>Derrota getting her hymen derrota when?
Bullies will be derrotados

>>19804980
I like them

Looky looky