/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Well lads my The Handy came in today. Turns out it doesn't really work on macro penises. I have a humongous, girthy dick with a completely average length and this shit literally will not work unless I fucking strap it on like a goddamn vice.

You'd think having a gigantically thick penis would prevent the the thing from slipping off, but you would be completely wrong. I cant get through two strokes on a comfortable tightness level without the thing falling off the sleeve. In order to get it to not fall off I have to fasten it really, really fucking tight and at that point the pressure required for the mechanism to follow the wide contours of my behemoth dick prevents it from actually making it even halfway down my shaft. This creates an upward thrusting bias which causes the strap to come off even when tight.

I can barely even fit in the sleeve separate from the machine. This shit almost turns fucking orbular just to reach around the extremely wide midsection of my shaft.

I am now worried that if I ever have sex with a woman for whatever reason or another, I will not be able to do it comfortably. Wasted three fucking hours trying to get this shit to work and gave my self fucking rock solid blue balls trying to keep myself hard for that long. I don't think I can play this off like I'm warning you guys or something, but to the one other guy in here with a girth around or above 5.76", don't even fucking bother with automatic masturbators.