/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Did I let you guys know that I love tanukis? I really do!

>>37168872
They have a sixth sense for money. They never lose when it comes to money. Even when shopping for groceries or clothes, they'll still somehow manage to get the store to owe them money. Do not underestimate these money adept raccoons.

>>36810531
>Rapes your wallet
>Rapes your credit score
>Rapes you

I would spend hours just sniffing tanuki breath while cuddling

I would spend hours just sniffing tanuki breath while cuddling

>>36204944
Get a loan.

>>36021706
I'm white, and I wanna facefuck a tanuki

>Hot tanuki breath wafting over your face
>Warm, sticky, tanuki spit covering you face
>Soft, slimy, tanuki tongue in your mouth

>>35320501
$25 for a blowjob isn't really high class

Haha, wouldn't it just be horrible if your face reeked of danuki spit from a long, sloppy face-licking? Absolutely awful haha

In an ideal world, my face would smashed against a tanuki's ass with my tongue buried deep in her butthole as far as it can go.

I bet you could get one to do literally anything if you paid them. Any fetish, any desire. Just give her the shiny coins

>>34178541
No, you're thinking tanukis. They can't resist anything that's 10% off

I want a tanuki to rape me like she rapes my credit score

Ah man, I wanna taste her all over. Her pussy, her ass, her mouth, her breasts. All of her!

>>34001717
Best course of action with danukis is to pay one for sex. It'll make her pussy wetter the Amazon Rainforest. She gets dick and money, the two things they absolutely love. And best of all, she didn't have to do anything for both. And if that wasn't enough, she gets a husband as a bonus! It's a win-win-WIN for her!

>>33886175
I want a story about an anon falling head over heels for a danuki, and when the subject of /biz/ comes up, he confesses how he's cursed, and that he buys the top and panic sells the bottom. And how he'd absolute love for a money raccoon to take care of the finances and make those decisions for him. Meanwhile, she's getting a danuki-boner and is consumed with an overwhelming urge to take him in under her striped tail and make him a /biz/ god for just a few dickings a day

>>33577472
I'm gonna convince the tanuki to prostitute herself out to me, but it's gonna be expensive as hell I bet. So I'll be sure to get a loan from her first!

>>30129445
Nah, that's too up front for a tanuki. They'll get you addicted to sex with them, constantly making you pay for it and loaning you the money. Then when you can't pay back the loans and you default on them, as per the contact, she takes you as collateral, and you're her "servant" for life. Which basically means husband.

I got things
Many things
Things to make you smile, things worth your wile
Things that could make your hair blue, things to make dreams come true
I got things

"You want it? I proably got it!"