/jp/ - Otaku Culture

“ABSOLUTELY NOT!”

I, Chen—hi!—, blink in confusion as Ran and I leave through the Gap to the sight of frightened cats running away from the center of the decayed room, just another of many Mayohiga has to offer. With her fist striking the table forcefully, her pitch-black wings flapping and her tokin crooked, Ayaya was visibly furious and embarrassed, sitting cross-legged on the brioche cushion I’d made for her~the same was true for Tetsu, who sat across from her, pouting like a moody baby, arms crossed behind her neck. “When ya' gonna forget that?! C'mon, Ayaya! It was but a joke—”

“You joked about eating my belly—my PREGNANT belly! You're not coming within ten yards of my eggs!” To Aya's dismay, Tetsu just pouted even more. “Stop pouting! There’s no reason for you to get mad at me; you’d do the same if our situations were reversed!”

“‘Course not; I don’t lay eggs, dumbass! But if I did, my brats would eat yours alive… F-Forget I said that; it wasn’t thinking.” Tetsu looked genuinely apologetic, though the pout had never left her face. Aya hummed a low 'okay'. “… Would you let me see your eggs if I brought you an odd assortment of shiny stuff?”

“Of Course n—” Aya paused, tapping on the table for a moment and recomposing herself, eyes on Tetsu’s big and shiny spork, the crow’s eyes narrowing… “Maybe.”

“Goodness gracious, what are you? Children?” Ran sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose; that called the attention of the women and the cats, who, perceiving the area as not dangerous anymore, returned to loafing around; some even nuzzled on Ran's fluffy tails. I—barely—resisted the urge to crouch and play with them; I have important information to discuss! Cannot lose time! Though Reimu-san isn't here yet, I wonder if she's okay…

“Children? We may be, Ranni-obaa~can you convince her to show me her cute eggs? That kind of insubordination would get her killed in the Animal Realm, you know? Refusing to show your offspring to your boss.” Tetsu ‘informed’.

“You cannot fool a conwoman; that's a lie!” Aya repeated, paused… Then stared at Ran inquisitively.

“Well, it is not a lie per se—refusing an order from your boss would get you slaughtered and feasted upon in the Animal Realm,” the fox said in a suddenly weary manner, making her way and sitting down at the table. Giggling at the reporter's look of distress and curiosity, I rounded the table, giving a hug to her and Tetsu—she almost crushed my bones… the best kind of hug~—before taking a seat by Ran. “But last time I checked, despite your aviary prowess, you aren't under Toutetsu's direct command.”

Aya's smile turned smug, showing it completely to Tetsu, who mumbled, “Not cool, Ranni. Not cool.” Before falling backwards onto her fork, the custom-made cushion sliding on the metal and stopping under her fluffy hair, her pout had also finally disappeared. “Eh, I'll get you some fine chocolate from Greater Hell then. Reporters are easy to buy anyway~” Aya seemed ready to argue, then paused again… And pouted with a huff, Tetsu snickering before turning to Ran. “So, what's on the menu today? Conspiracies? Are we finally diminishing Yukari's forces by killing some of her henchmen? I still believe that's the best way of dealing with things, y'know? Though we'd have to avoid the virgo turtle bitch and her monkey, Gensokyo is still neutral ground… Won’t be a problem when only my alliance remains~”

“Unfortunately, just killing all your enemies doesn't work as well as it used to back in the day,” Aya shrugs, pulling out her mini notebook and writing something down. “There are many pacts to withhold, promises, and so on. It doesn't stop the war from happening, but it'll make the loser regret it a lot. Attacking Yukari unprovoked means she'd twist the story to be as if Okina had started it all and boom: the Dragon God smites our best chance of taking down the HSE—same for the vice versa.” I nod along, not understanding but comprehending.

“Bleh, your politics suck ass; I'll never understand why you chose this bullshit over the simplicity of the Animal Real, Ranni,” Ran giggles, a sound of nostalgia that makes me warm inside. “What's so funny, baba?”

“Nothing, just reminiscing about the 'simplicity' of the Animal Realm—like that time we found a bestial egg no one could identify,” Tetsu was suddenly pale, and Aya had a glimmer in her eyes, pencil moving fast. Ran had closed her eyes in delight. “Which you proceeded to nurture with so much love I could swear it was yours, and then you—”

Flustered, Tetsu stepped in. Aw… “W-Where's Reimu anyway?!”

“She should be with us sometime in the next five to ten minutes—said she had something to show us, too~”

Tetsu perked up from her lying position, pointy teeth in show. “Ho~any tips on that?” Ran negated, Tetsu speaking some weird words I didn't quite understand—a fling...?—my attention wandering to Ayaya as things turned boring, watching as she scribbled on her notebook…

She looked very focused… Slim, too…

… Wait a second—