/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45999985 (3/3—p8)
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A simple truth.

Silence followed, my mind loudly howling, 'Hold me, please! It's too cold!'; a necessity so primal and that could so easily be achieved, yet that wasn't fulfilled, as another part of my heart—one that sounded a lot like Yuyuko—softly whispered, 'too much harm done… Stop'. The result is that, in my inactivity, I had lost myself in his eyes; there's a weird serenity there that, drowned by horror and wrath, I had missed…

… It felt like all that hatred I deemed 'him' was all but another cruel lie.

Even though he had diminished the one-meter gap separating us in this cold, dark room, it still felt like an impossibility to close it…

… A bloodied iron knife, dull and small.

The Gap cannot change the past.

“I love Hana. A lot… She's my world.” I took a quiet breath, my stomach heavy. “But Hana borrows a lot from her mother, despite her best efforts to look apart when she was a kid—her face, her mannerisms, her tastes and… There were so many times I looked at her and saw Reimu; remembered what she had done to me—to us. Yet I never hated my Hana for it. She's feeling lost, down and depressed now; she was misguided… I'll help her become someone she'll feel proud to be when the time comes, and I'm free from you.” His eyes once again fixed on mine, a gaze so intense it reminds me of burning coals—controlled, calm… devastating. “Reimu destroyed her childhood, and you destroyed her teenage years—you two took a lot from my little girl… But nothing will change the fact that she still has her father.”

I find myself holding my breath, hands clutching my belly even tighter, a weird sense of peace spreading through my veins and taking over my heart. It's a confused relief of sources that, when identified, made me sick: the old doubts of what'd happen if I'd to lose at the Solstice, doubts I cast aside when a dragon bowed to my greatness! Still, a woman to whom dragons bow down, weeping and clinging to precious life like this…

… So what if dragons bow down to me?

My baby—it's the only thing I truly am proud of…

My love, his hatred. I thought a connection existed there and that I could use it to cultivate love between our little family…

A thousand years ago, under that tree, covered in blood, it was all my fault.

Surrounded by lies and deceit, a parody of home.

… It seems nothing changed…

“You'll never love me…” I mutter, heart shattered, searching for something inside his eyes in this unexpected moment of clarity, eyes big and desperate, feeling as empty as that day under the tree.

“I'll never love you; I don't know if you'll someday manipulate my mind to make me love you—before today, I used to wonder why you hadn't done it yet too…. After everything you've done to me and my daughter, Yukari, I hate you with a burning passion. Every single day, I wish you were dead…” He sighs, and I slowly nod, looking forward, a clawing feeling reaching from the bottom of my being all the way up; it tasted like regret. For the first time ever, I doubted everything that surrounded me: my plans, the HSE, the war to come… Yuyuko's voice from deep inside is a calm hum, alluring. “… But I'll never hate our children. Because your sins—” he turns to me, and, with a tender quality in his eyes, he reaches forward, slowly closing the gap between us…

… Though his hand stopped, hovering above my belly.

Trembling, I gently held his wrist as if it were made of glass.

There was no desire to pull away.

And guided it to my belly, a painful smile on his face and a melodic lullaby inside my heart. It wasn't as cold… “—will never be theirs.”

My heart thumped, words about to come out—

Frowning, Anon looked away from me, as if hearing something…

… His hand landed on my belly.

—The world around us changed lightning-fast, to the point where it took me a second to understand what was happening. Skin shivering and perplexed, one single monolith called for mine and Anon's whole attention: a towering Sakura tree of blue.

Despite wanting to, I couldn't move.

There were two people around us, to which I didn't care…

… The only person who mattered was kneeling in front of Anon and me, her eyes—two nebulas—gleaming with innocent wonder and her huge smile making my heart skip a beat. What was her name, I wondered; she has Anon's eyes, my nose and—

Her hands reach for us, each softly holding one of our cheeks. Warm. Very warm…

Looking into her eyes… An eternal moment of beauty.

Us three…

… True connection.

Her voice, angelic. “Mother, father…”

W-What…

“… I love you.”

The next moment, everything had vanished. The world of blue, the gigantic tree, the sweet girl that called me her…

Stumbling, I gazed at Anon, my heart beating so fast I swear it'd jump out of my chest. Anon gawked at nothingness, confused and shaken. “… Father?” He parroted, his calm gone.

Father, mother…

… My hand was on top of Anon's—warm—, us two gently cradling the beautiful life inside my belly…

Our daughter…

… My smile was immense.

Deserves so much better from me,
deserves so much better than to be influenced by faggot-trash like them.
God I hope You will make things right,
so that I can make things right.