/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>46561778
Always good to be in the company of men of fine standing

>>44769398
It's been decent this past year, as in I'm not constantly wanting to shoot myself. I was only keeping back for the sake of my granny and the small tinge of hope I have for getting out of the neet rut I'm in.
Funny enough it was on Christmas I received a very nice Christmas card that snapped me out of my depression and allowed me to look forward again for the first time in a long while.
The effects of that magical Christmas card are waning and as of earlier this week I'm slipping again despite learning to soldier, helping my sister with her renpy project, making my own TTRPG and actively testing it enough to get it into a 2.0 state rule wise. Even farming (you)s through the various fanfics I've been working on and using as a way to harness my creativity.
I know how to escape this rut, I've done it before after all. It's as easy as putting on shoes and walking 150 miles to the nearest city and start making money. Still the horror of it all just surrounds me and I can't help but not see a future as I actively keep sabatoging myself because hindsight only occurs after you commit yourself.
If my granny died I'd probably go to Gensokyo, not from the sadness of losing her. I would be sad don't get me wrong, but the rest of my family has their futures and I don't need to be there for them. They can handle just fine with or wirhout me.
>>44769547
For me it was when I was in high-school reading LNs. I started realizing that all the characters I loved were a few years older, than I reached their ages, then I exceeded them. I can still enjoy their stories sometimes, but the last time I watched a high-school romcom was nagatoro back when it was still new and I dropped it after awhile once their relationship became more classic tsun. Not because I didn't like it, on the contrary I still enjoyed it plenty but much like vanilla romance and 18+ doujins I just can't help but feel this vast empty void. I missed all my chances for such things in life by being myself and not realizing when those opportunities happened. Now it's just an empty future ahead of me endless disappointment as I know that all romance avaliable to a man of my age is soulless and disgusting materialistic romance.

So the real question is how would (you) want to enter an abusive relationship with Reimu?
She turns mean after you marry despite being sweet earlier?
She is lightly a bitch during dating and it only gets worse later?
She coerces you into a relationship and goes lightly yandere?
Or something else?
Personally I love the first option, I think something broke in me.

>>41702678
Nuh uh