/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Angus had gone out into a witch hut to do something, so I went to spy on him. I see the hut, a magical lantern hanging over the door flared up a bit at my approach, the door swinging open, so I hide behind a nearby bush. I notice this bush is occupied by a possum hiding under it, so I figure I'll relocate to the next nearest bush once the coast is clear.

On a small ledge, below was a Pus of Man, I plunge attacked the human part, circled around, plunge attacked it again, and kept attacking the human part, until it died. I was irritated, since attacking the human part did no extra damage.
ZUN came over to me, he very quickly said "Hey I've got a version of the Touhou characters that all want to drag you off to have sex. No? You're good with that? Okay. Bye." then left. I was told I've lost everything, but I can still get it all back, I just have to play on Legendary difficulty, the hardest one, the option was beset with an orange jewel. I'm told I have to be like the legend of the lord who slew hundreds of heroes that rose up against him during his reign. I was given the name Darth Tian, appearing in a Vader-like outfit. There was a thing, where if you cover up the sides of the T my name becomes "FREE SEX"
In a grimy shed, there's a girl saying "Everyone in the world would have wanted to have sex with you, but now nobody in the world would!" Standing in a hall, a guy annoyed me so I chucked him at a wall, he turned into a little rabbit and went through a hole in the wall so I went through after him since he was necessary somehow, picked the little shit up, white rabbit with a brown tail, then hurried back because I knew some faggot would be proclaiming him King of Touhou in my abscence. Come back in to see a guy in Dragonslayer armour with Helm of Favor standing in the middle of the room, and kick him over. There was a possum on his head.

I was told I should hope, not want.
A guy who was prompted to come fuck with me comes over, looks at me like he's checking my aura, then just says "You're fucked" and walks off.

It's said I'm an Archdragon statue with its arms crossed, like this https://files.catbox.moe/a3fbhy.png

Naster is playing "Ds3" but he's a giant berserker, a few people are around him so he uses his ultimate, slamming the ground which tears it up in a circle around him. One of these people sends him a hurt message, saying something about his family. I'm walking with Naster and he shows me this message and says "Is this guy you?" I say "Hey, you goaded me" he says "Yeah, but how hard did I goad you?" I say "Yeah, I don't even remember what you said." I go with him into a bathroom. He's pissing at my right, there's a guy pissing at my left who makes me go "Woah!" since he's shooting a storm of piss.

There was a shark that looked up at another shark above it, saying some deep sea related curse, but then that shark noticed and started coming for it. It tried to swim away but the other shark bit one of its gills out, and it died as it sunk into the deep. Then I see dolphins say "Hey, that wasn't actually a shark, but a dolphin that talked a lot of shit and hadn't been told off yet". Because of this event, March 5th became a Valentine's Day for trannies.

I go outside my unit. Outside one of the other units was Yukari and Merry. I looked between them for a bit, the more adult looking one being Yukari. I was holding myself back, but then I said "I can't help it! At least let me chase after you!" She ran off while I chased her, eventually grabbing her in a hug. She looks around, and pulls up a hood that was apart of her tabard.

In a long hallway with Yukari and another guy. He laughs "You think she's beautiful" like he thinks she isn't. She laughs "Yeah" like she's smugly saying she is, I say "She *is* beautiful." Yukari sung a little song "There's wouldn't have been any cheating, any beating..."
I'm running down the hallway, collecting items, I can do an airdash to collect everything on screen, but it has a cooldown. I nearly miss one item, reach back and placing my foot on it. A trading card with Guts and his beast of darkness on it, thinking "Wouldn't want to miss this." Youmu comes from where I was headed, where a game was held, she looked defeated, and said "Only you can stop it..." Then I saw myself posting in a 1000 person stream "I'm the King of Touhou, Yukari's husband!" and linking my sites.

Walked a long way down a road looking for a hairdresser to clean up my hair for Yukari, but there actually wasn't a hairdresser in that direction, so I started walking home. I heard a song by Jimmy Urine, lyrics about being obsessed and completely fucked up emotionally, but that feeling was that only thing that was always there for him, helping him carry through. I went home. I said I had had two daughters, but they were now dead. Tragic, but this isn't so special, there's people out there that have actually had this happen to them, I can only pray to the gods I can become blessed once more.