/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45770223
Don't worry anon a fair maiden, who happens to be the most beautiful woman in the world and a princess from the moon as well, will come to your aid in no time.

Run all you want, once she makes you immortal time will be on her side.

>Kaguya enters the living room hoping to talk to you when you make your bid for freedom.
>After 100 years of basket weaving you are skilled enough to quickly entrap her in a large woven basket while you escape.
>But with her 200 years of experience in tap dancing she is able to sense the reverberations throughout the basket and pinpoint the weak point in the fibers to strike and destroy the basket.
>It's too late, and with your 300 years of oil painting you used the few seconds she was trapped in the basket to paint every surface in the room to look like other surfaces, rooms, and hallways all with their own painted walls painted with similar paintings in different orders to confuse her sense of direction.
>Unfortunately with her 400 years of blindfolded mountain biking she is able to close her eyes and navigate the room with echolocation by screeching and chases after you.
>Luckily thanks to your 500 years of hedge trimming you are able to create an exact duplicate of yourself in the yard that draws her attention.
>Tragically, her 600 years of baking key lime pies made lime, egg yolks, and sweetened condensed milk, and topped with a meringue topping made from egg whites, or with whipped cream leaves her able to detect that the faint scents of the ingredients of the pie you ate that morning led elsewhere and she determines your correct location.
>Quickly, you use your 700 years of misdirection to trick her into using her 800 years of crime scene reconstruction to piece together a past scene you already played out earlier using your 900 years of improvised acting in anticipation of this very moment, tricking her into observing the past while you hide in the present.
>You have five minutes until she uses her 1000 years of kite flying to manipulate the local atmospheric pressure to create a wind formation that creates a small vacuum pocket in the sky that will collapse and suck you up into the air for easy discovery unless you prepare.

>>44393976
Alright here's another I've got saved. Kaguya's immortal Husband trying to escape from her:
>Kaguya enters the living room hoping to talk to you when you make your bid for freedom.
>After 100 years of basket weaving you are skilled enough to quickly entrap her in a large woven basket while you escape.
>But with her 200 years of experience in tap dancing she is able to sense the reverberations throughout the basket and pinpoint the weak point in the fibers to strike and destroy the basket.
>It's too late, and with your 300 years of oil painting you used the few seconds she was trapped in the basket to paint every surface in the room to look like other surfaces, rooms, and hallways all with their own painted walls painted with similar paintings in different orders to confuse her sense of direction.
>Unfortunately with her 400 years of blindfolded mountain biking she is able to close her eyes and navigate the room with echolocation by screeching and chases after you.
>Luckily thanks to your 500 years of hedge trimming you are able to create an exact duplicate of yourself in the yard that draws her attention.
>Tragically, her 600 years of baking key lime pies made lime, egg yolks, and sweetened condensed milk, and topped with a meringue topping made from egg whites, or with whipped cream leaves her able to detect that the faint scents of the ingredients of the pie you ate that morning led elsewhere and she determines your correct location.
>Quickly, you use your 700 years of misdirection to trick her into using her 800 years of crime scene reconstruction to piece together a past scene you already played out earlier using your 900 years of improvised acting in anticipation of this very moment, tricking her into observing the past while you hide in the present.
>You have five minutes until she uses her 1000 years of kite flying to manipulate the local atmospheric pressure to create a wind formation that creates a small vacuum pocket in the sky that will collapse and suck you up into the air for easy discovery unless you prepare.

Guuuyaaaaa!!

>>40868455
I just got off the phone with Kaguya and she told me to tell you that you seriously creep her out and she thinks you are a loser. She also said I'm cool and invited me to hang out with her and play boardgames. Her words not mine.

>>36628846
You first, Mokou.