/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>valkyrie momster gets mad at you for masturbating
>says you should be blowing your load in her instead

>>20967706
>>20967729
Beasts and Demon beasts are pretty great, but I can't see why you'd ever pick a Majin over, say, an Angel or Demon type.

>>20909249
Pray really hard for a gf every night threatening to masturbate if your prayer isn't answered and the Chief Goddess will send down one of her servants to remind you that masturbation is immoral and a sin. From there it's up to you

>>18634330
I would make sure Valkyrie is properly rewarded for sticking with me throughout the adventure
>"Hey, Valkyrie, we're all dividing up the treasure. I want you to have this."
>"No, Hero, I really don't need any treasure. I'll be returning to Heaven soon, anyways."
>"Please take it, I insist."
>you hand her a comically small, palm-sized chest and she opens it with a smirk
>inside is the most ornate and elegant wedding ring that looks like it'd be right at home on a queen's hand

>Working the field of your farm, practically baking in the heat
>You wish you could continue adventuring, but an unfortunate run in with a dungeon trap cut that career short
>As you reminisce, a bright light surrounds you and you see a valkyrie descend from the heavens. You're so enthralled by her beauty that you can't even react
>She lands right in front of you and gives you a heavenly smile before blushing and looking away. She seems too embarrassed by something to meet your gaze
>"Greetings, Sir Anon. The Goddess' light shines upon you. I've been sent to aid you in fulfilling the prophesy of a great hero."
>...Whoa, wait, hold on. As much as you'd like to go on a journey with her, you tell her it's impossible to become a hero
>"No, you misunderstand. The hero isn't you, but rather your son."
>What? You don't have a son. You don't even have a...
>The valkyrie blushes a bit harder as she asks if she should make wedding arrangements at the local church
>Years later, your loving wife is preparing to give birth to your seventh child, as the prophesy was vague on which child would become the hero

>>17006596
Darn right.