/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>45349310
A proper touhou jojo parody would be great. Im hoping there is one. Some translated shit on danbooru or something. Yukari would be the big bad because her powers are the most busted and she's a massive asshole. She could manipulate the boundary between tripping on shoe laces and not tripping on them so the character she's fighting keeps falling on her fat ass. Someone tells her to take off her shoes so she doesnt trip and then Yukari pulls some other dumb shit out of her ass.

>>45229690
In the halls of the slain
Valkyries and heroes attend me
Ravens and wolves at my side
Forever they did befriend me

I paid an eye for a drink of mead
And was given wisdom supreme
Granted to me the secrets
Of magic, of life and death

Speared, hung upside down
Nine days and nights
No food nor mead
The will to be a sacrifice
Of myself unto myself

Wisdom and rhyme
Sorcery, death living inside me

Of life and death I am king
For both do I bring
By sword and spear and ring

Raise thy weapons on this day
Ye shall not die alone
Fight and die, let Valkyries fly
For they shall take thee home

I promise thee that on this night
Ye shall be by my side
Asgard's halls await with heroes
Brothers that have died

For thee we wait at Asgard's gates
Come join us by our side

Valhalla waits, so choose thy fate
For all of us must die

With George Costanza and a lady in a lounge watching TV. I saw a gateway opened beyond which was lava. A doomguard made its way forth, a human atop the gate shouted something at it to which it replied "Like I give a hell!" while slapping the human skywards with the side of his sword. It left through the gate, then a few seconds later the human landed just where the lava begins, facedown spreadeagle sinking into it, making George wince. The TV then said the government had secretly making advertisements promoting people, maybe something about Australian pride. I saw some of George. I wondered would they make for me, thinking up
"Leader of the Scourge and the Fel
Out beyond the Gates of Hell"
Saw a doomguard at the edge of a lava flow, closeby a giant human as big as himself. He stood for a moment waiting for an opening, then grabbed the giant and dragged him through the lava until he was completely covered by it.
In a class with the students sitting on the ground while I was at the front maybe doing stuff on the blackboard with another guy to my right. Yukari is the student closest to the front, right behind me. She was agitated by me and my ass moving around behind her head, turning around and pretending to jab at it. After a bit I wondered if it really did annoy her so I walked away, which causes an error on the computer screen projected on the board. I'm told this is my 5th error and next time is the last.
Go over to Yukari who is in front of a TV screen reading/writing a lullaby that was playing on it. When I come near her she starts reading everything with weird names, though I only remember the protagonist heading off into "Pierce Woods" which I saw a map of on the screen. I stand at her left, hugging into her while I feel really drowsy. I beg "Please, wife, I'm going to be thinking about these words in my sleep" Then the hug feels so nice and I'm so fucked up, I can't help but breathe strangely. About a second of two shuddering heaving breaths, a second of two small breaths then a little purr-like noise, repeating. I think of how she gave away that she loves me in the Bernkastel dream and wondered if she finds this cute. I saw the protagonist of the story, a blue cat girl.
In a shed looking at my phone that had a video saying something about good luck in love if I crow caws for you after watching it. Right afterwards a crow flies atop a rafter above me, I imitate a caw for it, it replies with a caw that imitated my imitation, then croaked "Hello", I said hello back. It said "Food?" I said "You like peanuts?" it asked "Peanuts?" I said "Wait there for me" it said something like "Growing long" I thought it meant it would get AIWS from waiting in one place.
With the graphics teacher from school, he asks if I want to go to the gym again. I say "Eh...maybe if you could possess me and lift the weights for me I could bother." He laughs and leaves, then I think I probably should have got him to punch my body tougher.
On a school trip along a dirt road, I go over to something like a white carriage filled with people where Yukari is on the other side. She has a huge syringe filled with clear solution and a spiral of dark green sediment throughout, asking if I want to inject radioactive testosterone. I say "We're going to be doing a lot of walking on trip right? My ass will hurt like hell." We go off alone for a bit, I walk off from her for a moment and notice she's writing weird things again. I peer over her shoulder at the book where at the middle of right page she was open to I saw the words "Izanami LGBT team"
On a school bus near the back. I notice three girls at the backseat who were pretty but cut their hair short and wore pants. I thought it'd be hot to ask for a foursome, considering doing so as we were getting off, wondering if I should stick my hand out after the one person getting off between us and ask, but didn't. We got off to go down to "my weakness" the river, to pray. But actually it was the nearby bay. So I said, "Going down to the bay to pray"

Sitting at a long bench with other people. A passing guy says to me he wants a double u put in his username. I ask "A w?" he says, "No, a double u" I look at the name floating above his head, maybe Conquerer. Then I was at a table with some guy at my left and Angus at my right voting on how many u his name should have. They voted 4u and 3u, I said the other guy is right and voted 4u too. The floating voting prompt screen on the table about the name changed to something about "6u" so we agreed, 6u 6u 6u
Go to a small assembly before a stage with a guy on it talking about Angusnicneven. I had a computer beside me which I checked for a couple of pages about him but they were blank, then the guy smugly says "he notices Angus's monstrousness."

>>39289874