/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>15948755
I've thought about it.

I work at a bank, most of my day is spent meeting people and helping them either plan things (vacations, college, new businesses, home buying) or taking care of their problems. Sounds mundane, but it's gratifying work, especially when you get to visit a business you helped make a reality, seeing how happy the new owners and customers are.

I would imagine meeting her as a flustered client trying to be respected as more than a monster girl only good for sex. She would be very brainy and shy, but ambitious, and willing to listen to good advice, whether it came from a human or a monster. I'd help her get things straightened out, put a plan together, and teach her how to deal with human clients. We'd bond personally meeting at museums and libraries, and enjoy talking long into the night, but it would be hard to move past the professional phase.

Until, one evening we go out for a drink together to celebrate her success. Naturally I would probably be quite shocked at her just slamming down drink after drink, way beyond my ability to keep up, until she can't contain herself anymore, drunkenly confessing her feelings, being dragged off to have steamy, bed-destroying sex all night long. Though she would be really embarrassed the next morning, some reassurances, and I think we could make it work.

Do you think it's hard to convince an Oni not to drink while they're pregnant?

Also >tfw your waifu has no fanart

>>15604837
Blue Oni.
That's like literally her thing

"Huuuuuh? Are you stuuuuuupid? There's no way we'll be satisfied with a little rinky dink glass like this!"

You tell the Oni girls to sit down and start drinking. But as soon as they do, the Blue Oni makes good on her statement and downs the alcoholic beverage poured before her in a fraction of a second.

You pour it again almost instantly.

To which the Blue Oni responds with a cocky laugh and downs the drink in the exact same manner. Her friends doing the same.

You pour it again. Faster.

The Onis look to each other confused and drink the shot given to them in the same manner.

You pour it AGAIN! Even FASTER!

The Blue Oni retracts herself for a second at the speed of which you refilled her drink, "N..NAHN DAH?!"

You tell the heavy drinkers to drink. And they comply, not wanting to lose face to a lowly human bartender.

"DOOOOORARARARARARARARARARA!"

You begin filling each girl's glass at insane speed and precision, without spilling a single drop. As quickly as they drink up, their glass is filled instantaneously. The Blue Oni begins to turn red out of sheer embarrassment at her incapability of keeping up.

Your pompadour unravels like a snake and grabs an expensive looking blue bottle from underneath the counter like a whip. The speed at which the bottle appears in your hand is so deceiving the Onis believe you to have willed the blue bottle into creation out of sheer badassery.

You decanter the expensive liquid into a funnel and wave a second bottle around, dipping each glass with chaff then topping it off with the finisher. The speed at which you do this is incredible, the Onis don't know what hits them. As the Onis unknowingly imbibe the liquor given to them, you pose fabulously behind the counter and point to the heavens above.

"You are already drunk."

"Huh----?"

!

The Onis collapse on the floor/counter sheer seconds after you state the fact.

You bow politely to the passed out alcoholics, thanking them for their continued patronage.