/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>14129149
boy, you don't have much uv'a choice.

>you get a kobold homestay
>you drive her into borderline yandere territory because you constantly ignore her healthy teachings and she feels a compulsion to correct your behavior
>on the way home from a long day of work
>you stop by the local corner store and pick up some cigarettes and a 40 oz; you really just want to take it sleazy
>it's a pleasant evening and you can't enjoy your goodies at home, because the kobold will just confiscate them and yell at you, so you decide to relax on a bench at a park near your home
>you light a cigarette and take a long drag as you take in your surroundings
>but out of nowhere, the silence is broken: "ABSOLUTELY NOT! NON! CHIGAU! VERBOTEN! NYET!"
>you've been caught
>"I was out for a run and I smelled something bad, something toxic, something gross, and where did my nose lead me but here? do you enjoy making me mad ? do you enjoy killing yourself slowly? do you enjoy those little cancer sticks? do you enjoy significant declines in your cardiovascular health?"
>she wag's her finger in the air and turns her back to you as she continues her "lecture"
>you take out the 40 oz from behind your back and take a big, cheeky sip
>"...and that's why cigarettes are a no no!" she finishes as she smacks a furry fist into a furry palm, turning around to see you
>her eyes go wide "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
>she snatches the bottle from your hands
>tears well in her eyes, "w-why do you betray me so?!"
>she lectures once more as she goes to the trash to dispose of your drink "alcohol is evil. soda is evil. juice is evil. energy drinks are evil. coffee is evil. We're only allowed to drink unsweetened tea, water, and water with lemon. remember?"
>she looks you over, hands on her hips
>"what am I going to do with you? I just don't get it. Why do you need poison sticks and poison drinks to make you happy when you have ME?"
>she makes you run 3 miles on the track around the park as punishment
>you can't help but love her

Monster Musume kobolds are better than MGE ones TBH