I told you I'd make it! My very first comic is done!

[Anonymous No.7068285]

Greetings /ic/, I'm back, as I said I would!

As the title says my very first comic book is done! Almost entirely hand drawn/inked and digitally colored! Almost; because scanning A3s was getting expensive so... I switched to digital after page 34.

>who are you?
I'm Puffer, best known as the anon who made the perspective video (also thanks for the kind messages, I didn't expect that to help so many of you!). I also occasionally post in here, and one of my last posts was about this comic.

>What do you want?
I just want to share my creation. If possible, I'd like to hear what you think about it. Constructive criticism is highly appreciated. Feel free to ask me about it as well.

>Where can I read it?
It's free, I uploaded it on Gumroad:
https://pufferart.gumroad.com/l/COTEBC

Reminder: This is the first comic I ever made, so don't expect the new Dark Knight returns... There are a lot of mistakes that I wish you can point out so I can improve in my next attempt. My goal is to be a professional artist one day, so any advice helps! General feedback would be nice, page layout even more.


-Puffer.

[Anonymous No.7068290]

>>7068285
Congratulations, now buy an ad.

[Anonymous No.7068297]

>>7068285
I remember that perspective video, was pretty based. Congrats on the comic.

[Anonymous No.7068300]

>>7068285
how many have you sold?

[Anonymous No.7068305]

>>7068300
Zero haha!

Even though it's free people don't seem to be interested lol.

[Anonymous No.7068307]

>>7068290
Thanks!
I wish I had the buck man... I truly do :( .


>>7068297
Thanks man! Feels good to be done with it!

[Anonymous No.7068311]

>>7068305
unfortunately, anons here are just more interested in a manga style comic, rather than north american style. the cover looks good though

[Anonymous No.7068313]

>>7068311
Thanks!

I also posted on my socials, but I'm not famous so...
The cover was inspired by those faces in TWD DELUXE Edition done by D. Finch.

[Anonymous No.7068317]

>>7068285
no idea who you are anon, but i'll give your comic a read
good luck with further projects, nice to see people finishing their plans

[Anonymous No.7068322]

>>7068317
Hey thank you!
I have another video planned for this semester, hopefully I will be able to finish it too!

[Anonymous No.7068327]

>>7068285
i can tell from the cover it is absolute trash

[Anonymous No.7068331]

>>7068327
You’re not that wrong anon. But I bet the next one will be less trash. And isn’t that what truly matters?

[Anonymous No.7068334]

>>7068285
King shit! That's a huge accomplishment.

[Anonymous No.7068338]

>>7068285
Oh, I remember you asking about what to call it. Congratulations on finishing it! That’s a big deal! Absolutely fucking based, anon. I’ll give it a read. I like Val Kilmer on the cover, too.

[Anonymous No.7068342]

>>7068285
Good job! I'll be honest: It's not something I'd read. But it's still a thing you made and finished. That's worth a lot! Keep going. We're all gonna make it.

[Anonymous No.7068347]

>>7068285
>a conceptual comic in every level. pages will not be consistent
bruh
>the font
idk why, but some letters are more thicker than others. maybe it is my autism, but it is really annoying. imho readability of the comic should be 100%, not whatever this is

I picked that one page as an example of what i find weird about the comic
>white background
the color palette you are working with is very muddy, desaturated one. that is clashing hard with the brightest color aka WHITE. the comic would look miles better with some brownish or gray texture as background. the white takes all the focus on itself and there isnt a single panel which would wrestle the focus on itself
>crosshatching VS shading
usually you either use crosshatching for shading and then use simple colors. but you are inconsistently sometimes using color shifts and sometimes hatching. as a result it looks really weird and disrupting. just look at the dudes face in middle up panel: it is like he morphed into a new being. decide either to go full color with very minor crosshatching or vice versa. dont switch it randomly between panels
>stiff figures
no matter if the people stand still and talk, or wrestling for a gun, they look stiff. study gesture more

And lastly the platform you chose to host your comic is... bad. You need about 4 mouse clicks, an email address before the webpage coughs up 100MB+ pdf file which can take ages before your browser/pdf reader renders first page. Host your comic on pages where it loads 1st page INSTANTLY after reader clicks on a link to it. We live in age of zoomers who dont have patience for filling up forms before reading beg comics.

And your hands are weak.

[Anonymous No.7068355]

>>7068334
I have no idea what you mean by King Shit but thanks!

>>7068338
LOL thanks anon!

>>7068342
No need to read it if you don't feel like it mate, thanks for the words!
Either we're all gonna make or die trying!

[Anonymous No.7068357]

>>7068322
some shots are good, some are bad (hatching on pages 8–9 should've been redone), the writing confused me on the first go-through and it felt too much in-medias-res
but you know what, it was an interesting read, good luck with what you do next

>>7068347
agreed here

[Anonymous No.7068366]

>>7068347
Hey thank you so much for reading and taking the time to give me a feedback, it means a lot!

As I mention in the credits I've never inked before, so I'm still trying to figure things out. The comic is indeed conceptual since I'm experimenting on every page. I eventually settled.

I hadn't considered the background to be honest, I though the norm was for it to be white.

Yes I need to practice more in every aspect haha. Also people recommended me to post on Gumroad, so I clueless now.

>>7068357
Hey if SOME are good, than hell yeah I'm happy.


Curious fact no one asked for: I completely changed the way I draw after the comic was done. I learned a lot about me while making it.
I liked pick related.

[Anonymous No.7068370]

>>7068366
*pic related.

[Anonymous No.7068376]

>>7068366
>Hey if SOME are good, than hell yeah I'm happy.
the ones where it's perspective shit are pretty neat even for a non-comic-reader like me; i'm thinking pages 25 and 30. the head gore bits were pretty neat too
> Curious fact no one asked for: I completely changed the way I draw after the comic was done. I learned a lot about me while making it.
that's how it should ultimately be.

planning a new one already or

[Anonymous No.7068393]

>>7068376
I see, I also think that perspective is my strongest fundamental at the moment. I liked page 1 the most in that regard.


>planning a new one already or
Already scripted and ready to be story-boarded baby!!! I won't stop untill I'm dead (and if Satan allows, me I'll keep on doing it).

[Anonymous No.7068427]

>>7068311
I don't think it would get many clicks even if it was manga-style. This is an image board, he's got a comic he wants us to look at. Do the math, he could/should just be uploading the images here instead of asking us to go through some other website.

[Anonymous No.7068431]

>>7068285
Congrats! I'm honestly surprised to see your comic printed and published already, good job. Good call in sticking with the title most anons suggested

>>7068366
Interesting page composition, I don't think I've ever encountered this panel distribution

[Anonymous No.7068449]

>>7068285
You need better fonts.

[Anonymous No.7068450]

>>7068285
Good, gl forward man.
I'm all tired but too stubborn to give up. I'll be there too. At some point.

[Anonymous No.7068461]

Congrats bro! Wish you all the luck and success in the world. Don't stop now, push forward.

[Anonymous No.7068471]

Happy for you anon!
In fact, I just bought it! (for a dollar)

I hope it isn't some globohomo propaganda, but I've giving you benefit of the doubt!

[Anonymous No.7068479]

>>7068285
Congrats, it takes courage and dedication. I understand this is a demo and its not a final product, my thoughts.

what I liked:
the landscapes and backgrounds
the environment details helps to immerse
the usage of color in the memory panels (red wound), cliche but it works.

what I didn't like:
the story telling feels like: this happens and then this other thing happens and then wakes up from day dreaming, rinse and repeat. The rhythm of the story is boring. Trey parker did a lecture on this thing super short but I think your storytelling can improve by but and therefore. It may be a excerpt from your main story but this things are writer crutches so i bet you will find them in your main script too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9jEg9uiLOU

paneling: its too small, hard to read. this is why I don't like colored comics, most of the time the value management makes everything hard to read. put things on the background out of focus, make your subject pop. Also because of this I got lost I don't remember any character just Bennie and someone dies, I guess her ex but hard to tell.

Almost all the poses feel stiff

I'm not the target audience for your comic but good luck, you should watch more westerns I think you can pick up some things from the classics.

[Anonymous No.7068483]

>>7068427
Are you sure you would rather me post 45+ pages here?

>>7068431
I used Amazon KDP to do that. About the panel layout, I think it's quite common actually.

>>7068449
I do! It was my first time doing a comic font. Do you have any good resources on lettering? Kind of hard to find them...

>>7068450
Crap, what about me? I "gave up" twice, but couldn't sleep not knowing if I'd be able to make it or not. I just can't let this drawing shit go man, I'm obsessed. I need to get better and make it work, somehow.

>>7068461
I feel like I can't stop even if I wanted to. I'm too stubborn to let it go. Drawing is my only passion in life. It bites me in the ass constantly... but yeah. I know it is kind of pathetic but at least I have something to work towards day to day.

[Anonymous No.7068487]

>>7068483
>Are you sure you would rather me post 45+ pages here?
Yes. You already made a thread, the least you could do is post the thing you made the thread for. This is an imageboard, it's made for you to post images in.

[Anonymous No.7068490]

>>7068285
Congrats, It's an accomplishment to finish any project. How long did you spend on it?

>>7068305
Try going to a zine or indie publishing fair, I'm sure you could sell a few there.

[Anonymous No.7068494]

This is the kind of comic that I'd see on a comic store's shelves and then be reminded about why comic sales are dead nowadays.

[Anonymous No.7068503]

>>7068471
Oh man you didn't have to! I'm beyond flattered, like I put it for free no need to spend money on it. This is the first time someone spent money on something I did. I don't know how to thank you with pretty words, but I really appreciate it man. Seriously. I'd send you a copy with a personalized sketch but I live in a third world country and the shipment cost would be unironically more expensive than if you printed it out yourself.

>>7068479
Again, thanks so much for taking the time.

I agree with you, I made up the story very haphazardly but I didn't want to begin the main tale without any experience. I think it was the right decision at the end of the day. I also plan on getting some people to look over my main script before drawing it out this time, the time investment is too big to waste.

Consistency is an issue indeed. But I'm getting better at it now. Crap at the beginning (page 1-6) Benny has like three different faces lol.

Gesture is in my daily practice now.

I plan on reading more comics too, there's always room for inspiration and improvement.


Pic related is concept art for the main comic, I really liked Bernie Wrightson's take on Frankenstein (yeah, how original of me haha), and tried to emulate it with a brush. What a mess I did...

[Anonymous No.7068504]

>>7068494
Post your comic, we'll wait. :)

[Anonymous No.7068505]

>>7068483
>>7068487
I think 5-10 pages should suffice for general impressions and critiques, I don't think the jannies will like a 50 page comic being storytimed on here.

[Anonymous No.7068508]

>>7068487
I'm posting man, but 45 images is borderline spamming...

>>7068490
About 3.5 months. I deadlined myself.

I wish there were such things in my city. Bro I live in the middle of nowhere, like 6000 people live here, we barely got cable internet haha.

>>7068494
To be fair, plenty of indie creators are making a huge buck on comics. The big three on the other hand...

[Anonymous No.7068509]

>>7068503
>I live in a third world country
Makes me feel better about buying it now. Happy to help, people here who actually draw, even if its only a dollar

[Anonymous No.7068518]

>>7068503
yeah man I saw those panels and I was I wish the whole comic were in monochrome, specially top right the contrast between straight lines and curved lines its a banger.

[Anonymous No.7068528]

>>7068509
I'll probably never be able to shake your hand, but I hope life thanks you back.

>>7068518
Yes I also enjoyed them! I'm still not 100% on my inks, but improving for sure!

Speaking of which, any good ink masters that do critiques on patreon? I'm talking really good inkers.

[Anonymous No.7068600]

>>7068508
>Bro I live in the middle of nowhere
No fairs at all there? Not even just local markets? You'd be surprised at the amount of locals who want to support other locals.
If you have no fairs (or even if you do) try contacting your local book/new agents/any kind of stores, maybe even the local library, and try pitching them on selling a book by a local artist.

[Anonymous No.7068614]

>>7068285
Congrats man! I'll read it tonight.

Shame you didn't pick my name suggestion but I understand you might want to ease into the comic industry and not just become a superstar overnight
>My Life Is Just As Wrong As I Expected After Traveling to The Extinction Zone Where I’m Surrounded By Cute Girls At A Post Apocalypse High School And Am Also The Fabled Hero of Legend...

[Anonymous No.7068632]

>>7068505
>I don't think the jannies will like a 50 page comic being storytimed on here.
>>7068508
>I'm posting man, but 45 images is borderline spamming...
Making a thread just to shill your Gumroad is closer to spamming than posting artwork on the artwork critique board, retard. Actually posting the comic is better than just linking to it. You made a thread, that's already worse than posting pages in an already existing thread, spam-wise.

[Anonymous No.7068697]

>>7068614
>>My Life Is Just As Wrong As I Expected After Traveling to The Extinction Zone Where I’m Surrounded By Cute Girls At A Post Apocalypse High School And Am Also The Fabled Hero of Legend...
What a missed opportunity.
>>7068632
Jesus dude, just hide the thread or click the link you nodrawnigger

[Anonymous No.7068813]

>>7068697
>just hide the thread or click the link you nodrawnigger
It's because I'm busy drawing that I don't care to click through links just to see somebody's work who came here and asked for feedback in the first place.
The only reason I said something is because somebody complained that "anons here are just more interested in a manga style comic", when the problem is really just that OP is linking out instead of just posting the fucking comic where it's easy to see and comment on individual pages. All this just because OP thinks dumping his comic in a thread he made about his comic is spamming, when in reality it's worse to post the thread without dumping the comic.

[Anonymous No.7069075]

>>7068285
Congratulations, anon, but I'll be honest, the cover art looks just plain fucking ugly. I mean it's good technically, but it's that ugly as sin western artstyle, that you see on fully stocked comic book shelves next emptied manga shelves.

[Anonymous No.7069292]

>>7068632
I’m not shilling anything, it’s all free.

>>7069075
Yeah I’m not super happy with the cover either. I think that the biggest sin is the “logo”, or lack there of…

[Anonymous No.7069773]

>>7068503
I like that page, are you familiar with Al Williamson, Alex Raymond? Those are my two favorite western comic artists and your ink style reminds me of theirs

[Anonymous No.7069779]

>>7069773
I also liked that page, took me a while to ink it but I did like the result. I believe I implemented this style in most of the architecture/buildings inks. Page 01 for example (>>7068393).

I'm unfamiliar with these artists but I'm adding them to the list of people to look up.

[Anonymous No.7069788]

>>7068285
where did you get your comic printed, anon? Paper is so expensive nowadays

[Anonymous No.7069808]

>>7069788
I used Amazon KDP. They offer you a deal in which you can get premium paper (their words, although it is good quality) at a production cost. I printed in the USA and imported it, which was salty on the pocket but other local options were even worse...

On amazon, it's 10 bucks per copy (free shipping with prime). I don't think it ended up being that expensive but the Big Three definitely get a better deal since theirs are cheaper. I couldn't go much lower because I'd be having no profit which is against their terms.

But yeah, pretty expensive man. There's a lot of YT videos that talk about printing methods and companies; if you're looking for them I'd recommend you to watch several as I found some sources to be biased against Amazon because le capitalism. I mean I don't love Amazon but what alternative do I have? I can't charge premium for a normal comic that is already more expensive than the standard ones...

[Anonymous No.7069828]

>>7068285
Dated and repulsive looking. Imagine wasting all this time on a disposable piece of scroll by shit like this. You could have just used AI and saved yourself the trouble.

[Anonymous No.7069836]

aren’t you the guy that ripped off the fallout 3 intro before you got shat on by /mmg/?

[Anonymous No.7069863]

>>7069828
You may be right. But I have nothing better to do with my life so... bite me I guess.

>>7069836
I have never played Fallout 3, but anons did point it out. I don't know anything about mmg. You mean the Manga threads?

[Anonymous No.7073277]

Bump

[Anonymous No.7073286]

>>7068285
A lot of people will give you harsh feedback, but know that you should allow yourself a feel of good/pride in that you finished something.

Absorb the feedback and continue the struggle

[Anonymous No.7073330]

The thread is still up! I thought it had died, but ok!

>>7073286
I know people here can be harsh but I like that the unfiltered opinion is genuine. This is something I can only get on 4chan for better or worst.
Also, here is the only place I can get feedback since no one else was willing to read the damn thing. I mean I posted it in other places but no one answered me so yeah.

Since I'm here, I have a question for anyone who's reading it:

What are good communities/forums in which people review each others comic scripts? Is the literature board a good place for it? I've never been there. Also I need someone to read my other video script as well. Last time I made a thread in here and some anons helped me a bit but ghosted me after a while :/

[Anonymous No.7073388]

>>7068331
based as fuck. if more /beg/s on this board thought like this they wouldn't be so miserable.

[Anonymous No.7073394]

>>7073330
Frankly, it couldn't hurt to try regardless. Worst case you just get ignored.

[Anonymous No.7073397]

>>7073330
>since no one else was willing to read the damn thing.
I think the main flaw is that it's quite a niche story and vibe
That's fine, but being able to make something marketable, or even wanting to be read is a skill too and means sacrificing some artistic integrity somewhat.
To which extend is up to you.
It means turning art into a product and focusing on "what do I want to make" vs "how will others enjoy it more"
It's like making food for yourself vs making food for a family dinner if you want a food analogy
It's not inherently a thing of right or wrong, but looking at what is (becoming increasingly more) popular could help out. both in terms of style and story.
Great stuff that never gets read vs bad stuff that gets consumed en-masse ect.
Again: not trying to curb your artistic view, that's fine, but doing a market analysis and tying it all together.

Reminds me of the Spy x Family author. He's a mangaka who had a lot of attempts at serialization before and he personally doesn't like working on the series, but the series is beloved by many.

As many have said: your platform of choice might also not be the greatest. Try webtoon comic websites ect. and focus on getting the distribution as wide and easily accessable as possible for now.
I'm saying this in the context of that your next work will probably beat the shit out of this one; nobody wants to read a medoicre first work from a no-name author if it takes more than 2 clicks to start reading and give it a shot.
Make the first 2-3 pages banger, do a one-shot if needed that immediately grabs the eye.

[Anonymous No.7073398]

>>7068285
congratulations OP. it's great you saw your project through. something I haven't been able to accomplish yet.

[Anonymous No.7073454]

>>7073388
I think it goes to anything in life really. I try to keep this mindset whenever possible.

>>7073397
I completely agree with you. It's not marketable at all.

Just like other artists I'm pretty bad when it comes to marketing. A while ago I was desperately trying to get into the gaming industry (if you've seen my links it's pretty easy to tell) and failing miserably. You know when people say they hear crickets? Man I heard nothing. I'd send e-mails and slide into DMs to get not even a "no" in return.

Someone told me I should do something I care about instead of what's marketable, hence the comic. Something I care about. At the end it must be something in between, just polar extremes so far.

>>7073398
Thanks man; hey it just takes time. If I did it, anyone can. Awesome pic btw.

Let's keep at it bros. Currently grinding some fundies as one does.

[Anonymous No.7074227]

>>7068285
Congrats bro. First off ignore the straight up haters, finishing an entire comic is a major accomplishment and for that you should be proud.
Some had more specific criticism on lettering, hatching, marketing, and story that are probably valid.
I never read it yet due to time (I'm a wagie in addition to art) but hope to in the future. So I'll just point you in some directions on the visual side:
>lettering
You've already said the lettering needs some work. Check out Nate Piekos' Essential Guide to Comic Book Lettering. It's short on how to develop your own lettering style, but gives strong pointers on choosing the right fonts, spacing, balloon placement, etc. He also offers his own comic fonts (some for free) through blambot.com
>hatching
Guptill's Rendering in Pen and Ink is the go-to classic on hatching. Alphonso Dunn's Pen & Ink drawing is a more contemporary book. Both could take your hatching/pen work to the next level.
>art
Moebius seems to be an influence, right? Regardless I could see how studying the best European/American comic artists could benefit you.
Moebius, Philippe Caza, Philippe Druillet, Jean-Claude Mézières, Al Williamson/Alex Raymond (mentioned already), Wallace Wood, Steve Ditko, Jack Kirby, Richard Corben ... these all seem in line with what you're doing. I find studying masters you creatively align with as effective (or more) as grinding fundies.
You have the right non-doomer attitude, keep at it.

[Anonymous No.7074247]

>>7073454
>Someone told me I should do something I care about instead of what's marketable, hence the comic. Something I care about. At the end it must be something in between, just polar extremes so far.
The thing is, the advice isn't wrong, but it isn't right either. Creating something you care about is just as much a crapshoot as making something you don't but at least you're making something you care about. It's rare for the exact thing you're passionate about to be what clicks with readers. That's why editors in japan will tell authors to come up with stories that the authors themselves care about, but still go to town editing it into something marketable.
At the end of the day, just because you care about it doesn't mean the readers will. So the work of changing the work enough to be appealing to the intended audience is necessary. But even then, it's no guarantee. The success of any given comic is a crapshoot. You have to take a shotgun approach if you want consistent success, throw a ton of ideas at the wall and see what sticks. That's why manga thrives while comics flounder: sheer volume of new works all the time means some of them are bound to succeed.

[Anonymous No.7074343]

I want everyone to know that I'm saving these long answers for future reference. I'm making a text document and highlighting things I should improve. It really helps a lot, thanks once again.

>>7074227
>I'm a wagie in addition to art
I've been there man, it sucks. I was a teacher for a while (in my country we make as much, sometimes less than wagies (we get paid per class hour only, not counting the bigger portion of the work such as homework correction etc...)) and the stuff I had to put up with was just terrible. I know what is like dealing with public, feel free to read it when you've got the time and energy.
In fact I'll be back to the wagie life soon.

In regards to hatching, yeah, I'm still trying to find out what drives me in inking. I really like some of the old pen and ink illustrations (1500s, 1600s, etc...) hence why I feel in love with Bernie Wrightson's take on Frankenstein. But I also have appreciation for the modern stuff with guys such as Richard Friend. I feel like I still need to do some extra studies and experimentation before moving on...

>Moebius seems to be an influence, right?
Not really to be honest. Actually I feel flattered that you see his influence in me somehow. I like his stuff but I think mine is more messy and out there, you know? I'll take a look on the list of artists thanks!

>>7074247
Yeah, that's why I plan on having other people read my script before moving on. Hard part is finding these people. No one I ask seem available. I'll try the writing/literature board once I finish my current studies, hopefully I'll have more luck there.

[Anonymous No.7074976]

>>7068503
Gave it a read because I like indie stuff, the head split was cool but the rest meh although I didn't have trouble following along. Way too much text on the first page, just to explain you were experimenting. The last page when there's the ink only example of the main comic is probably the best stuff in there.

[Anonymous No.7075025]

>>7068285
why tf are the pages like 10K pixels wide
how many fucking people do you know that have a giant monitor

[Anonymous No.7075271]

>>7068305
>Zero haha!
>Even though it's free people don't seem to be interested lol
So it's vanity press? Congrats on having money to waste I guess

[Anonymous No.7075323]

>>7068313
It’s a very unappealing cover. Looks like a Greta thurnberg bio-graphic novel

[Anonymous No.7075468]

>>7074976
Thanks for reading! The splash pages were my favorite bits too.

I must be honest I didn’t expect people to really like those experimental brush inks. I’ll definitely experiment more.

>>7075025
I didn’t scan the pages myself. The folks at the stationary shop must’ve cranked up the resolution.

>>7075323
Yeah the cover isn’t the strongest point…

[Anonymous No.7077032]

>>7068285
>>7068305
Hey man, congrats but I can see exactly why people ignored your work
It lacks appeal

To start with, the cover does not impart any sort of emotion and does not tell you what it is about.
Based on the title, I expect that this is post-apo or at least feature heavy and controversial themes but nothing here implies that. The characters just stands there doing nothing

The big face is extremely bland
There's not enough playing with the light and the transition between the left and right images lacks a significant contrast. You ought to look at your idol better

That said, great job and I pray for your success