/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

Read a book and copy others

Go read framed ink but yeah it's mostly about reading to get ideas.

>>4318085
Start making comics asap so you can get used to figuring out panel and page compositions, and from there you will learn what your technical weakpoints are. Read other comics and watch movies to see how they use panel compositions to create mood/pacing

>>4318085
take screenshots from a movie scene you like, copy the camera angles. making comics by scott mccloud has tips on pacing, picking key moments, etc. make sure it flows in the direction its read, and there isnt too much mess getting in the way. if someone has to stop and figure out how what theyre looking at, the flow is gone. same for lettering, consistent size, dont squish it into a bubble, use a good font.

>>4318107
This. It has everything you need to know.

>>4318107
>>4319426
mega link for this book?

>>4318085
storyboarding is basically comics. i do not know what you meant by this.

Use software like Comipo

https://store.steampowered.com/app/262490/Manga_Maker_Comipo/

You guys know any books about storyboarding?

>>4319517
Why the fuck would you do that when CSP exists?

>>4318085
I have a ton of notes on cartooning in my moleskine but they're slightly pedantic. A few on manga as well but I haven't transferred them yet.

>>4318085
This channel has a lot of useful info on how the Japs make their manga
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEnqdJTx9rYBAO0s6Croabw/videos

This blog has useful info on comics in general
http://one-shotstructure.blogspot.com/

Thoughts on this, so far? I took as much viable critique as I could from my last attempt on this particular page.

>>4320726
Composition is very good, can very clearly follow the storytelling without much in the way of visual noise. Linework is pretty interesting and adds a lot of visual appeal. Upper panel looks a bit off with the house sitting atop what appears to be a stone spire, could probably use some more background elements to properly establish scene. Face on the old man in the big panel looks a bit wonky and took me a second to realize it was the same character on the cutoff panel. Probably needs some adjustment around the mouth and mustache.

7.5/10, good job, keep at it.

>>4320781
Thanks for the input. I see I hafta focus more on drawing people at different angles

>>4320726
Looks like a western comic

Just by doing something like this it looks more like a manga

>>4319465
https://libgen.is/book/index.php?md5=42F89738FBF79FB2B396EBEBDA4B1CFF

>>4320726
Feels barren, like the scenarios need more things to make them feel lived in

It looks too western like youre trying to mimic japanese style instead of actually finding your own anime style.
The dojo building is too japanese also. This looks sci-fi when looking at the other panels so just make it a sci-fi building rendered in manga style. You dont have to remind the reader what the influences are.
Kill that tangent at the top of the girls head and turn her around to make it feel more like manga. She’s way too big in this page composition for us to be staring at her back. Thats some western comic shit.
Manga will always use a full body to show off a cool transformation or to show who now has dominance in a battle in shonen.
Also this whole establishing panel is too static. It reads like she’s just standing there letting them admire her or something. This is really enforced by her t pose position.. she isnt doing anything.
I broke that up in my redraw that huge panel is doing nothing in your current layout. Its showing nothing. Its too close to show the environment and nothing is happening substantial like a brutal punch or something.

Also work on your shapes. Do thumbnails over and over. Your shapes should be visible from space. This page isnt interesting enough to keep a reader. Also you arnt leading the flow of the readers eye down the page.

Notice in my redraw...

1 the forced perspective on the dojo turns the subject matter into a triangle leading them more into the panel from the top middle. The rocks gather towards the girls head thats overlapping to lead into the next panel

2 full body drawing with the ponytail leading into next panel.

3 face close up with forced perspective is an inverted trangle leading into last panel


Study Oda of one piece and Akira toriyama. Fuck everybody else. One piece is the best selling comic by a single artist of all time and theres a reason for that. He’s a master of composition and he learned it from Toriyama. The flawless flow of his pages keeps the reader in his work. Good luck.

iT lOoKs ToO wEsTErN

Also to add to my redraw i would probably add an over head wide shot of the interior of the characters positions in the scene and the setting before going to the full body panel.

>>4321066
Don't shitpost genuine crits. It's obvious what anon was going for, so it's fair to help him hit that.

>>4318107
>copy others
One very successful manga author advises against this:

>SJA: Do you have any advice for aspiring mangaka?

>MK: Don’t read too much manga. [laughs]
>Personally, I didn’t grow up reading manga, and instead, I was inspired by reading a lot of novels and watching movies. If you continue to just read your favorite manga series and emulate it, it’ll be very difficult to make a manga that surpasses the original. You might as well try out a manga that you don’t like, because once you start to analyze why it works for others, you’ll start to get ideas from that. Also you should have fun in your life. Go out and explore. Experience as many things as possible. Then draw. Just try to draw a manga and show it to people.

>>4321444
>MK
Masashi Kishimoto?

>>4320726
I did a quick rough thumbnail of how I would do it:

Panel 1: the establishing shot should also suggest the mood. I did it by setting it at night, using 3 points perspective with a tilted angle, and putting one side of the building in full shadow. With all this black you can also use contrast to guide the eye. The lit side of the building is where the action is.

Panel 2: same ideas. More shadows to suggest mood and also guide the eye. The camera is low and close to the girl, so she's bigger than the two guys, and the two guys are framed by the girl's thighs.

Panel 3: I used another panel because to me your second panel was doing two things at once, showing the menace of the girl and the reaction of the old man. So I separate them to focus on one thing at a time.

Panel 4: Basically what you did.

Looks awesome!
I didn't do too detailed a BG for the house, because a classmate was gonna do some extra stuff in the BG, digitaly. The house is supposed to be floating on a rock in the middle of nowhere due to the little kids power.

I alsoay have posted this in the wrong thread. I don't think we're making a manga. I think we're just doing a comic

>>4322017
I should also note, they're hiding in a basement corner.

>>4321661
Very nice love how the camera zooms closer and closer in each panel. And the shapes are so complex. Gives the page much needed weight considering the mood

>>4321661
How do you pick such dynamic angles and perspectives? It's really pulls me in.

>>4321661
Damn, that's nice

>>4320726
Curious. What's happening here? The old guy is scared of the lady, obviously. But why?

>>4321661
That's sofucking sexy. I could never pull of something like that

Sauce on the image? That's a cute Reimoo

>>4322320
https://e-hentai.org/g/598835/871bde7608/
It's a Yukari going to comiket doujin though

>>4321447
What is this page from?

>>4318107
Looks like Araki is secretly based and redpilled

>>4322017
Are you new? Do you know how to respond to people?

>>4322833
thanks

>>4321661
I love this, really nice style and use of blacks.
do you do comics, or have a blog I can follow?

>>4321064
>>4321661
Super good posts.

>>4321064
And Toriyama learned muscles and composition from copying scenes from Bruce Lee movies from VHS in the early 80's.

>>4323267
Oda started drawing from copying Disney movies.

>>4321444
I think Annos advice phrases this a lot better. You want to take inspiration from multiple places and make something that is your own instead of an emulation of someone else. If you make your own thing you'll be the best at it, if you try to copy someone else you'll always be a worse version of them.

>>4321444
There's also lots of successful manga authors that are saying how copying is important.

>>4322903
Shuukan Shounen Hachi. Sadly it got the axe

>>4321661
sir a demand a blog

>>4323073
seems like it

>>4318085
I always see manga/(web)comics that would fall under (battle)shounen and/or superpower stuff that get posted and crits in these threads. Should I even bother with a sol story?

>>4324677
Make what you want to make.

>>4324677
sol stuff is very popular with the right crowd

>>4318085
What I'm having a lot of issues with is character design
For some reason I can barely think of one that could meet the three most basic rules I'm using (easy to replicate, unique enough to be recognizable as an outline, matches the character sheet) and I wonder if it's because I'm just not creative or because I've set a bar that's too high
doesn't help that in the story takes part in a school with uniform clothes and hairstyles, so that easy way out goes down the shitter

>>4322071
one idea is to think of movies, shows, cutscenes etc. - they all at a stage go through storyboarding, and they're not too far apart from each other
of course, you need to remember that it's one thing to show something on-screen for 5s and different to put it as a static image, so you will need to be a bit more condensed - and to use a more 'boring' shot if need be
other than that unironically parrot what you like, if a shot/page composition/etc. resonates with you there's no shame in reusing that

>>4321447
>>4324048
man I'd love to one day be at Eiji Masuda's level, his expression game is on point

>>4322017
Can you post the page when y'all are finished?

>>4322242
My guess would be she's here to kill the kid for whatever reason is making him smoke and his dad (?) is trying to stop her. Like maybe he's a "good" demon and she's a demon hunter, or something similar.

That's what I get.

>>4320965
>https://libgen.is/book/index.php?md5=42F89738FBF79FB2B396EBEBDA4B1CFF
thank you pal

>>4318085
Comics is heavy on literary. Manga is simple

>>4327797
death note disagrees.

>>4326607
can you post an example we can rate?

>>4327797
manga is translated from another language entirely, of course the translator is going to dumb the language down for muricans

Bump

>>4327797
>Comics is heavy on literary.
Lmao.