/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

I'm even happier.

>>3567734
This but the opposite.

I've got two new portraits and a third for autumn which is b+ good. I will end this year with about eight or ten resoanble canvases which is a marked improvement over the last two years. I am going to start on a life size canvaS SOON. fUCKING HELL.

The start of the year was too cold to draw anything. Then summer was a heat wave and my hands were too sweaty to draw. Maybe next year

>>3567716
started drawing in like late may, haven't drawn anything worth looking at but I keep going everyday and feel myself improving which is more than I can say when all I did was anime and vidya. If drawing is really so stagnant and painful for you why not just do something else?

>>3567716
I planned on finishing 12 (200 page) sketchbooks but I’m on my fourth now, so I’ll only reach about half my goal. The toughest hurdle for me in my art journey was figuring out what direction to take my style, in the end I decided to move away from anime entirely

>>3567716
you want achieve much if 4 months to go is almost the end of the year for you

i can just see you at 2pm 'well it's basically dinner time, might as well call it quits for the day'

>>3567735
How could it be the opposite when you have ME?

I don't put myself any goal, just draw.

>>3567716
I'm improving my health and by Christmas maybe I'll be able to live like a normal human being.

My goal is to finish two sculptures by the end of the year. Either I'm going to do it or my body is going to give out, either way I'm not terrified of failure as a concept nor do I feel like the consequences of failure are something that must be avoided at all costs. So I'm able to work hard with a clear mind.

Remember, /ic/, there have been studies on human motivation that show most goals tend to go really well at the start, flag in the middle when enthusiasm dips, and then get a kick in the ass to completion near the end when deadlines loom. If you're a little behind right now that's normal, but it's time to start pushing. Don't give up.

Inktober hasn't started yet and that will be my challenge for this year.

>>3567716
Hell no! I said to myself this year I'm gonna do more digital, but I ended up doing a lot of gesture and figure drawing. Also got a little better at drawing anime though. Looks like I'm gonna wait till next year to try and do digital again.

>>3567772
>tfw I read this at 2 PM
I'll keep going anon

I started drawing more seriously. Made a lot more pictures than usual. Then I basically abandoned my blog in favor of trying out fetish art which turned out to be really fun. Got way more fans than my sfw content did (to be expected) and even did a few commissions, which is the first time I've really made money in my life. Overall I was feeling pretty good.

Then in my quest to find ways to improve my art I came here and remembered how shitty my art actually is so now I'm sad again.

Did my first paid commissions and even accomplished my quota of commission's I wanted to do before asking for more money, even if it was for the same guy.

Until the end of the year I want to get at least 3 commissions per month constantly, I don't know if is possible with my current abilities and I kind hate post and shill my work everywhere, but semms like the only likely way of me getting such thing.

I didn't draw as much as I wanted to but I still drew every day.
I still haven't done any finished works, mostly just sketches and studies but I plan to change that in the coming months as I've been experimenting more with watercolor and gouache.
I also plan to attend some life drawing sessions in the coming weeks.

I'm a bit insecure, I don't want to expose myself until I reach an "acceptable" level so I keep everything to myself.
I want to change that too, I noticed that I keep shifting the threshold as what would be acceptable, I think it would be good for me if I had some group of people in which we could discuss and critique our art and goals. A real group, offline.

>>3568457
>I cam here and remembered how shitty my art is
That's what great about this place honestly.

>>3568495

I guess but it does pretty much zap all my creative motivation right out of me.

I mean I knew I wasn't good but I didn't think I was THAT bad.

>>3568501
You'll always be good enough for ME <3

>>3568501
Just improve anon, unlike manletism or autism your artistic skills are something that you can get better at, so no need to feel down about it!

Didn't really set any goals. I'm starting to draw every day and getting better bit by bit. Also giving an honest try to get used to CSP, I always go cross-eyed at art programs and give up after a while.

I achieved heights I never even dared to dream of. I landed on the radar of some important people in the gaming industry recently and have been getting high profile gigs since then. I went from 350 USD tcg illustrations to 3k USD cover iand marketing ilustrations.

>>3568520
Fuck yeah!
Congratulations, anon.

Broke up with a girl whom I'm crazy about but nothing in the relationship was going right and (i had a lot of issues which were exacerbated when my best friend killed himself.) then all this shit happened and I lost my mind. Family put me in a psyche ward for several months, lost everything in my life. Did a lot of drawing there though and made some improvements. It's been a rough year. Want to jump off a bridge sometimes. She wants to work things out but I don't have much life left in me.

>>3568520
>>3568523
Life in a nutshell.

>>3567716
literally 4 months left, calm down drama queen.

but so far
>wrote a resume for first time
>submitted to countless apps
>went through like 5 cycles of grief and mania related to job searching and didnt kill myself once
>went to my first interview
>also my first absoltue shit interview where i was laughed out
>made peace with all my ex gfs and cut contact with the ones that i was still keeping on the backburner
>mentally severed myself from parents and oppressive friend groups
>worked on house with dad
>took gre and applied to grad schools
>got into a grad school and starting next week
>lost 10 lbs of stress weight


i made a lot of progress. i dont think i did jack shit in 2017. i jacked off a lot and cried a lot, and ate a ton of junk food.

>>3568523
That's what you get for messing with thots. Sorry about your buddy tho

>>3567716
My resolution was to draw like Murata and then the blog, fanbase and exposure will naturally show up. But I'm still not quite there yet. But I believe that by December I should be close enough to be satisfied.

>>3567716
I'm just glad I got back into drawing. Using digital mediums was the new thing for me.
Getting exposure would be nice, but my art isn't good enough just yet.

>>3567716
>So what have you achieved?
I haven't even started

>>3567886
This right here are the words of a top bloke.
There is still around 3 months left anons, commit to it and you can do it

my new years resolution was to quit smoking
I began a week ago, so all is well
besides, it's day 229, there's 136 days left! the year isn't nearly over!

>>3567716
Tbh 2018 was just me facing artblock
I mostly drppped my blog out of the lack of motovation and my sketchbook wouldnt gain more than 3 filled pages a month
The only thing that kept me going was a Graphics Club i go to every tuesday during the school year.
I always have the oppurtunity to talk to many talented artists there, and get advice regarding my work
It's rly great if you ask me

>>3568591
If it was a tumblr blog you should know that it's all about the tags there
I remember how i would never tag my posts properly and i wouldnt get more than 8 notes
But all it took was for me to take the time to do it right and the post got 31 notes (even though looking back the piece was absolute garbage)

>>3567716
I started this January after spending my whole life afraid to, and I managed to fill two sketchbooks so far.

The unfinished sketches are already a victory to childhood me.

Got paid out my long service from my first job after a mental breakdown. Dropped down to 45kg. Quit my second job after nine months working for them, lived off savings and money off my art for three months, got to 48kg. Moved to a new town with just a handful of friends, no family, scored a new job after handing in a resume late and was assured I had the job before going into the interview. Made some good money, advanced heaps in my art this year, had a group exhibition with some mates that was sponsored by the local government, smashed out some collabs, pretty much have found time to draw or do something creative every day this year. Got to 54kg but have dropped lately. Had some mad depressing times where I thought I would literally go nuts, took acid and spoke to grass, met some incredible people and had some mind blowing experiences. Just advanced so much after struggling for so long.

>>3567716
Art-wise I achieved nothing. There's room for improvement but I'm actually fairly happy with my current skills. In actuality I've been focusing way, WAAAAY more on writing this year for my dream comic (which is actually a kinetic novel). When the script's done I'll finally be able to draw this thing

> almost the end of the year

dude, it's August.

>haven't drawn for a while because no tablet
>finally buy a new one
>friend wants me to draw for her, even offers commission
>i agree because i need the practice and money
>give her the finished art, which somehow to my surprise is better than any of my previous stuff despite not drawing anything for the past 7 months
>decide to share it with friends because i feel kinda happy with it
>even better she fucking loves it
>she posts it to her guildies
>suddenly an influx of people asking me for commissions
>i'm now commissioned for 5 people and have at least 11 people on a waiting list
>overwhelmed af
>kinda wanna die

it sounds like a humble brag but i'm legit freaking the fuck out. i'm not a good artist and it feels like i'm cheating people out of their money. what the fuck do i do?

>>3568641
People buy dumb shit. If they're stupid enough to give you money for one of your drawings, take it. They think you're good enough. Honestly people have no idea when it comes to art and they'll pay stupid prices for stupid things. If they're willing, accept it.

My older sister was diagnosed with stage IV glioblastoma multiforme (the most aggressive brain cancer) and we've told she won't make it to Christmas.

The average glioblastoma sufferer is 64 y/o men. My sister is 30.

We found out 5 weeks ago and my sister still doesn't know she's terminal. Right now she's on her 6th neurosurgery due to complications from a cerebrospinal fluid leak and an infected bone flap which had to be removed. Now she has a giant hole in her skull which brain is exposed through. Right now she's just sleeping, a lot. Like everyday she mostly sleeps, and it was only yesterday that it clicked, "final stages of cancer is decreased consciousness".

My mother has forbidden anybody from telling her because she's frightened that when she finds out that she'll just give up and we'll lose her much, much earlier. I don't feel good about this at all. 3 weeks ago, before she had to go back into hospital I was sat on the sofa next to her, holding her hand and listening to her sob about... how lucky she was. How lucky she was that the surgeons got 95% of the tumour, and that she'll live because of it. How not many people are lucky enough to be given a second chance like this. I smiled to her and nodded, squeezing her hand all the way.

I lied to my dying sister.

This doesn't feel right. I don't like it one bit. Not at all. It makes me feel sick. But if she were told, and then she did just give up, just gave up and died, could we really say that we made the right decision? Is it better for her to spend her remaining days in sleepy, optimistic ignorance or in terror of imminent oblivion?

My first funeral is going to be my sister's. I have never felt pain like this.

>>3568663
I'm so sorry anon..

>>3568663
My first funeral was also my sister's and my niece's. It will hurt forever but you will learn to live with it and even appreciate life more since you experienced first-hand how fragile it is. First few years will be tough, be prepared and you'll make it.

>>3568663
Ignorance is bliss, as they say.

>>3568663
I'm sorry anon.

>>3568669
Yeah. I'm sorry for myself too. I'm sorry for my sister. I'm sorry for everybody involved in this, everybody that has ever been involved in something like this, and everybody that will be involved in something like this. I never really understood grief until now. Words have not been made to describe the horror and pain that accompanys grief. I used to be such an edgelord before. I thought that when I first encountered death that I would struggle to even cry, but I was foolish and ignorant. It's so different when it actually happens. Nothing can prepare you for it.

I don't know why I'm posting this to this board of all places, but I have nobody to talk to about this and I need to get this pain out of me somehow.

Hey guys. Don't take your loved ones for granted. Hold them close to you, hold them dear to you. Don't let petty squabbles get in the way of your love. I hadn't spoken to my sister for 5 years on account of this tumour. It was in her frontal lobe and made her act crazy. We all thought it was the drugs and the alcohol, turns out her addiction was a symptom, not a cause. This entire time we'd been interacting with her tumour, not her.

Nobody could have predicted this. Not even the army of medical professionals that have treated her over the years and suspected BPD or some sort of schizoaffective disorder. A fucking brain tumour. It doesn't feel real.

When she came home after they removed 95% of the tumour, I suddenly had my big, cool sister back after all these years, but I'd never realised just how small and fragile my big, cool sister was. I'd never realised just how small her hands until that moment.

I cut her from my life for 5 years and now I'm going to lose her forever. 5 years lost because I wasn't proactive enough I let the hurt of her actions caused by her tumour cloud my love for her. I will carry this guilt with me for the rest of my life.

>>3568675
That's what people keep saying to me actually. That it will never be normal again and that life after this will simply be a case of getting used to the new normal. I can already feel now how much this has changed me. I'll never be who I was before this.

I actually prefer this cold, rational logic to the people telling me that it will be okay though, because I know it won't ever be okay again. Thank you though. I'm just sorry for you that you're in a position where you're able to give me this advice. I wish it hadn't had to be this way for either of us.

>>3568676
>>3568679
Thanks guys. These little interactions and comforts are like shining a little light on me when I'm wandering through a black cave.

I think I'm just gonna go be alone for a while. Sorry for sperging all over this thread.

>>3568680
>>3568687
>I'd never realised just how small her hands until that moment.
Stay strong anon.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80uSeDhQTW0

>>3568687
>>3568680

I'm returning to russia, a country i haven't been in since i was 10 (30 now). Got tired of living 20 years undocumented and constantly blocked from life opportunities/travel abilities. All the freinds/cons/etc i've missed out because I have been dead locked by lack of piece of paper. On the flipside my youtube and freelance work is going well and I have over 250k subs on youtube.

>>3567716
>almost the end of the year

i graduated art skewl

Guys this is not fun!
I don't know how i will deal with my parents death in the future, i can't imagine my life without them, it's so lonely.
My mom won't wake me up in the morning anymore, the father won't go to the supermarket and buy snacks for everyone from time to time anymore.
I'm 22 and they're in their 60s now.

>>3568641
we all get lucky from time to time with a piece

rule of thumb: never use an piece for advertising or client work until you are not use you can keep that level of quality while also keeping a decent quantity of it

>>3567841
this is possibly the worst thing you can do.
>hey anon what do you do for a living?
>i draw
>ooh like those graphic designers?
>n-no i just draw

>>3568663
Aw shit anon, that sucks

>>3568698
I have the same thoughts. The only way to avoid the loneliness is to start our own families

>>3568663
that sucks and all but what does this have to do with /ic/

>>3568641
this has happened to me before and every commission after was not as good as the initial, and yes even normies will notice that. that might freak you out but theres a solution
also this >>3568701
I mean frankly if you were so rusty you should not have accepted new commissions without a big warning sign to the customers.
so the short term solution is to work them until they look right follow the same formula you did for the initial and use a shit ton of reference for your weak points
long term is to study between each commission.

>>3568663
anon that's beautiful
the best work is made from the strongest emotions
use those complicated feelings and make something beautiful
make a portrait of your sister
capture that feeling

>>3568663
Anon, she knows she's dying. Your mom is kind of a stupid cunt, sorry. She thinks she can shield her daughter from her own death. That's a big yikes from me.

>>3567716
IT is NOT "ALMOST THE END OF THE YEAR"
FUCK OFF WE'VE STILL GOT ALL OF FALL AND A LITTLE OF WINTER LEFT

>almost the end of the year

You still have four months

My art blog is doing alright but i know could be doing better. Need to study more between posting works.

>>3568838
>anon that's beautiful
Only on 4chan™

>>3568641
post some wips to an art discord, maybe someone will take pity on you

>>3568869
let me guess, inktober?

>>3568663

Isn't this illegal? If your sister is 30, shouldn't the doctors have told her the reality of her diagnosis?

>>3567716
Eh, it could have gone better but I do still think I made progress. Got to work on an actual project but like I mentioned in a different thread that isn't going so well.
Even if things aren't going the way I wanted them to I'm still working towards my overall goal and learning a lot on the way. Can't really complain!

>So what have you achieved?

Nothing, but I am in the shape of my life. By the end of the year I expect to look like a manlet version of the Engineer from the 2012 Ridley Scott film, "Prometheus"®. Not that any of that matters.

>Did you fulfill that newyear's resolution for 2018 or are you still stuck in the ruts with unfinished sketches, no blog, no fanbase, and absolutely no exposure?

Guilty!

>>3568663

lad, I'm so sorry

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TT3t4_V9ZzY

I'm pretty good. I finally got over my pride and started taking meds for depression, now I feel like I might make it after all.

>>3568698
It's the life, try to appreciate it for what it is, in all its bitter sweet beauty. Find something meaningful to set your mind to while you're at it.

>>3568663
I'm very sorry. Squeeze her hand extra tight for me and try to find a balance - she should know that there's a (non negligible) possibility she won't make it, so she can mentally take that into account. Otherwise she might hate you and the whole world in her final moments, that wouldn't be good.
Just.. try to have fun. You know what they say, if they told you you'll have your right leg amputated tomorrow, would you sit at home and cry or run and run and jump up high somewhere off on a meadow?

>>3568687

>>3567716
I have a bunch of unfinished sketches but I'm forcing myself to finish a few and I now have a regularly updated art blog.
I can't get comms for shit and might end up starving before year's end though.

>>3568942
I was thinking the same thing. I guess every country is different but it's definitely illegal here.

>>3568663
>come for art feels
>leave with real feels
im sorry anon

>>3568505
>unlike manletism or autism

>>3567716
I had 2 exhibitions, got into design school, drew more than ever before, lost virginity,
but I did not fulfil my NYR of quitting this fucking website.
I guess the fourth time's the charm.

>>3568663
I am so fucking sorry anon. This is pure shit.

I made a portfolio in the first few months of the year and got some work during the summer. learned a lot, but now im just grinding it out to produce better work. It's a long journey boys.

>>3567716
I finally started drawing!
I used to be so afraid to apply myself; and though i still am in many aspects, i have taken up drawing to get better. I hate my guts when the results look like shit, but its the first step, and its the only way to make it.

>>3567716
Can someone link the new year's resolution thread? I've completely forgotten mine.

>>3567716
I managed to quit art. there's a glut of amazing young artists working for nothing nowadays, and all the 'pros' make more money teaching. it's a giant pyramid scheme, see you suckers later

i want to have an online portfolio by the end of this year, it's kinda lame i still have to send it in PDF form

Started drawing last year to get out of my 6 year long phase of animating sticks.

The goal was to be able to roughly draw the body for random animations. I achieved that and I'm happy.

I got a job in the game industry (as a 3d artist), which means I can finally go back to drawing in my freetime as I don't have to worry about starving. I do 3d at work and 2d when I come home, it's been pretty comfy so far.

>>3568663
I feel you anon, though I can't imagine what it's like knowing of the impending doom for so long. I lost the family member I was closest to, but for me the news came out of nowhere on a regular day.

It's going to hurt, and you'll never be the same. But allow yourself to mourn and don't bottle it up. When the pain just begins to lessen, remember that you have the rest of your life to live. For me, knowing that my mom always supported my dreams helps me move forward. And that even if I fail at a career in art, I know she'd be glowing with pride just knowing that I even tried at all. That as long as I try my best, she will be smiling down on me.

Best wishes to you anon. You're not alone

>>3567716
I drew for over 100 days in a row this year, for a minimum of 30 minutes a day. It might not sound like a big deal to anyone else, but for me it's strengthened my discipline and confidence.

I can whip out a rough sketch of a character in 15-30 minutes, rather than noodling on it for 2-3 hours.
When I set out to learn something, it sticks in my brain much faster now.
And I've slowly but persistently been chipping away at bigger projects, rather than killing myself by taking on too much of it all at once.

I'm going to hit 2019 off at a running start. For myself, and for my mom, who died in February of this year. (>>3571227) I will never forget how she went out of her way to cheer someone up, even just a little bit. I will carry on her legacy by making others smile, too.

Let's all make it, anons.